I Forgive You

by Father Pie

No One Is Perfect, After All... We're Only Human

Hi mother,

It's been years now. When I was younger, living with you was amazing! We were always going places, never staying in one place for too long. Though now that I'm older I realize that taking care of me by yourself must have been hard... I don't ever recall your job; Though you did your best to make sure I was happy, and you did a great job there... I don't ever recall being sad, or mad.

What about you mom? Were you sad? Of course you were, I remember all the empty cans of cheap alcohol around our home, I was too young to realize you drank yourself to sleep when you could. If I had known maybe I could have helped you. Wishful thinking, you couldn't even help yourself. I also know that you only wanted to be happy, I couldn't blame you, but I didn't want any one replacing my dad. Looking back now, yeah... I liked them, they were pretty cool guys; Though you never kept them around for very long, I wonder why? What did they do or say?

I never really had any close friends... We never stayed around in one place long enough, but I didn't care as long we met new people. I never told you before I left that I hate meeting new people now did I? I can't be in a relationship either mom, I don't trust others easily. Perhaps it's one of many flaws that I've inherited from you. That made me smile, mom you're perfect, because for all your faults, and all your mistakes... It only now makes me realize that my mom was a person, and people can't be strong by themselves.

Hey mom, do you remember all the friends of yours we visited? They were always so weird, but they were weird in a cool way. They never did any thing lamely, and they were always really funny. They never did live really long did they? Substance abusers is what I recognize them as now, I'm glad you never got like that around me.

I never wanted to be like you mom, not when I knew what you were... A failure. I now see that you aren't a failure, but a winner, and what you won was another day... You were a repeat offender of that prize, and I'm glad.

I had always thought that maybe... Maybe I wouldn't invite you to my wedding; Selfish huh?

I forgive you mom, and I hope you know that I never hated you for anything.

Rainbow Dash sighed, it had taken her years to work up the courage to write that letter, it was short, for all the years that she had kept her feelings pent up it had felt amazing to pour it all out; Though she now had to write her second letter... Dash smiled softly at the memories she had made with her father, now all she had to do was write her letter to him.

Hello father.

Dad... Do you remember when I was little and I used to shower with you? I loved being under the water with you, I miss when you washed my hair, toweled me off, and brushed my hair. Do you miss that as well? I had always assumed we were a happy family, you and mom cuddled on your bed, though maybe that was for my benefit? I never really gave it much thought when you and mom split up. I also never understood why mom left me with you, why did she leave me with you dad?

Remember when we lived with grandma? I never saw you often then, but grandma never brought it up, I think she was sad. What about you dad? Were you sad when mom left you? Maybe you were, because you also liked to drink alot, but maybe that was because you didn't want to mess up with me? I like to think that was the reason, and not because you didn't care. I also think you cared alot because after a year you got your own house, and we moved from grandma's.

Dad... Did you ever smile when mom left you? I don't ever remember seeing you smile, unless something really funny happened; Did you hate me? Did you blame me for mom leaving us? Maybe that's why you started to drink.

I know you tried to fill the void in your heart, I never did like the women you dated. I didn't want them to replace mom, looking back now though... I see that you didn't do it to replace mom, but you did it to ease your own pain, the alcohol also eased some of that pain too. I couldn't stand it dad, when I would wake up to an empty house, because you didn't make it home from a party. Sometimes I would walk to grandma's and she would hold me until I fell asleep, she never looked happy when I arrived alone at night. I wonder what she said to you.

Dad, I hated you for so long... Whenever I visited we would start to wrestle, maybe you thought it was me playing around, but I really wanted to hurt you.

Dad I now realize that you loved me with all your heart, but you never knew how to show it properly... I also have that problem, I can't express myself to my friends properly either.

Dad for being human, for having faults, and not being perfect... I forgive you.

Putting her pen down, Rainbow reached a hand to her eyes and began wiping away tears that had formed on them as she was writing her letters. Rainbow pushed off her table and leaned in her chair, her mind was racing through memories of simpler times; Time then seemed to move so slowly, a day seemed to last forever. Though now, time felt as if it passed by in an instant, Rainbow leaned forward, her chair finally having all of its legs on the floor. She debated in her mind whether or not to send the letters to her parents.
Rainbow sighed, her eyes falling to the floor... It still felt too soon, she could send them another day.