Megan 5, 5873
Sparkle's Log: It's been a few days since Clinical Trial came into my life and swept me off my hooves. I find my thoughts alternately consumed by him and the mysterious oil he gave me. All attempts to locate the stallion have failed, up to and including Grenadine's Planetary Scrying, which of course has the entire world as its area of effect. The only logical conclusion is that he came from another plane entirely. I'll have to ask Pinkie or Ditzy about it at some point.
For now, however, I'm refocusing all of my efforts on the oil. It's simply amazing! As I noted before, it exhibits virtually all properties of life, save for metabolism. It doesn't seem to require any material input at all. Oh, it can certainly accept and use food, usually to reproduce, but it doesn't need food anymore than a seapony needs a skateboard.
In another amazing development, I've finally found something that Spike won't eat. Well, that's not fair, there are plenty of things he's capable of digesting that he chooses not to consume. Me, for example. But this oil actually managed to suppress a young dragon's appetite. I'm pretty sure that that's unprecedented.
These observations are all well and good, but I'm not going to get anywhere without a more scientific approach. I need to think of some experiments, ways to put this stuff through its paces, show what it can do. The only questions are how and with what. Or maybe, just maybe... who.
Gitaxias provided each of his siblings with a portal to Equestria, each sympathetically keyed to a location that would match the mana of its surroundings. Vorinclex's portal opened in a forest, of course. A dark, ominous wood that smelled of untamed hostility. He'd smiled. Maybe this wouldn't be a complete disappointment after all.
First things first: Establish a beachhead. That had been as simple as pointing a few putrefaces in the right direction. The beasts were designed to perform three tasks over their brief life spans: maul, infect, and breed. They did so with their usual efficiency, the very trees weeping glistening oil in a matter of days.
From there, it was simply a matter of introducing superior species to a foreign ecosystem and letting nature handle the rest. Reluctantly, at Glissa's insistence, the Voice of Hunger allowed elves through to oversee the conquest. Distasteful as he found sapience, he admitted that it proved marginally useful in the early stages of an invasion.
Of course, that led to another matter entirely...
"WHY ARE MY ELVES TURNING INTO PREY ANIMALS!?"
Jin-Gitaxias might have blinked if he could. He definitely tapped his chin in thought. "Well, that's that hypothesis confirmed."
"WHAT HYPOTHESIS?"
"Morphic field restriction," Gitaxias answered idly. "The reason why there aren't any humans in Equestria is because they literally cannot exist in its set of physical laws."
"ELVES AREN'T HUMANS!"
"No, but they are hominids, and that appears to be where the line is drawn. From my studies, only ape descendants should be affected. Goblins, leonin, loxodons, all should be unaffected."
A grumble rose deep in Vorinclex's throat. There was a lot of throat. There was a lot of grumble. "AND, OF COURSE, I DON'T HAVE ANY OF THOSE!"
Jin shrugged. "Well, you don't have a lot of humanoids in general. Try your exarchs. They should be sufficiently processed not to register as taxonomic contraband. Out of curiosity, what specifically did the elves turn into?"
"DEER." The enormous praetor spat out the four-letter word like it was a four-letter word and closed communications.
The Core Augur pondered this for a moment. "Deer. Elk. Elf. Hm. Wordplay."
The life of a shaman is one of ascetic seclusion, steeped in ancient tradition and ritual in a never-ending quest towards enlightenment through oneness with nature.
Of course, even the enlightened need to eat, and for all of its benefits for the soul, oneness with nature does nothing for the stomach. As such, Zecora was gathering from the bounty of the Everfree when she spotted movement in the corner of her eye. She betrayed no reaction beyond slowly, casually turning her head for a better look. Surprisingly, it wasn't some denizen of the forest in the mood for an exotic meal.
"Now what creature do I see here?" she muttered to herself. "Some sort of foreign armored deer?"
Indeed, it seemed to be a doe, though unlike any the zebra had ever seen. Her coat was an odd greenish hue that seemed more suited for a pony than a hart. At least, it was where it was visible. Much of her body was encased in a strange copper-colored carapace, leaving only her flank and the upper regions of her legs exposed. She seemed to be looking for something.
Ascetic seclusion was one thing. Forging an alliance with one of those few neighbors who don't want to eat you was another. Zecora moved closer before warmly saying, "Greetings, friend, or so I hope. I wish you well. No need to mope."
The stranger's head snapped towards her with almost painful speed, and the shaman found herself struggling not to flinch. The doe frowned, but said nothing. Perhaps Zecora had been spending too long amongst the ponies, but she was not put off by this recalcitrance. "I must confess surprise to see a deer here in the Everfree. Most of your kin believe they should remain within the Whitetail Wood."
For a few moments, there was silence. Finally, the deer asked, "Do you always speak in rhyme?" Her voice had clearly been beautiful once, but now it was marred by a hoarse rasp, as though she hadn't had a drink for years.
"Shamanic tradition demands it of me to make sure I do not speak frivolously."
The doe's stance relaxed a bit. It was still wary, but didn't exude quite the same level of suspicion and hostility. "You are a shaman, then."
Zecora nodded. "I wander the world to be one with the wild, for it is my mother and I am its child."
"I see." She chuckled to herself, a sound uncannily like a log being sawed in half. "You might say I am doing the same thing."
The zebra smiled. "Our goals in life appear the same. If you would be so kind, your name?"
"Glissa. Yours?"
"Zecora, my dam and my sire decided, would mark where their foal's identity resided."
"Zecora." Glissa gave a small smile of her own. "Come. Walk with me. We undoubtedly have much to share. Insights into the nature of nature."
The zebra fell into step with her before voicing a nagging question. "Before all the lessons of trunk, branch, and petal, I must ask, why do you wear all of that metal?"
"Ah. That is a rather complicated story, but one you will no doubt find quite enlightening..."
Applejack looked up from the supper dishes when she heard the familiar sound of scratching at the door. The farmhoof gave a pleased sigh as she interrupted herself. "All right, Winona, Ah'm comin'." The scratching seemed unusually vigorous and didn't abate after her call, making the mare frown a bit in confusion. "Shoot, girl, what's got yer tail in a knot?"
She got her answer when she opened the front door. "Y'all ain't Winona."
The timberwolf didn't comment on that obvious statement, instead shouldering past the shocked pony and rushing for the stairs.
A moment later, Applejack registered that a dangerous denizen of the Everfree Forest had just entered her home. "Now hold on an apple-buckin' minute there!" She chased after the wooden predator, only to stop in shock at the scene before her.
The timberwolf, a symbol of the Everfree, of nature unguided by pony hoof, had its head in her grandmother's lap, whimpering like a scolded puppy. Granny Smith, to her credit, seemed to be taking it in stride, soothingly stroking the rough-hewn wood of the creature's scalp as she rocked in her chair. "What's the matter, li'l fella?" cooed the Apple matriarch.
"G-Granny! What in the name o' cinnamon sticks is goin' on here?"
The old mare shot her granddaughter a tepid glare. "Y'all hush now, Applejack. Th' timberwolves an' Ah have had ourselves an understandin' since b'fore y' were born." She turned back to the cowed canid. "What awful, awful beast did this to ya?"
The beast simply whimpered. Only then did Applejack notice the splintering rents in its body, long swaths of damage that seemed to have come from a massive set of claws, slowly dripping tree sap and some black, bilious fluid. After another few strokes of Granny's forehoof, the timberwolf shuddered, and the lights of its eyes flickered and died. It collapsed into a pile of wooden scraps shortly thereafter.
Applejack said nothing for a time, stunned by the event. Timberwolves weren't the worst threat in the Everfree, but she'd never heard of something that not only fatally wounded one but sent it running to a pony of all creatures. "Whaddaya reckon did this to it, Granny?"
The older earth pony didn't break her gaze from the wolf's still-intact head, still in her lap. "Ah don't rightly know, Jackie. 'Tain't good, though. 'Tain't good at all."
Megan 8, 5873
Sparkle's Log: I had the dream again. I've never put much stock in oneiromancy, but even I won't deny that the same vivid dream three nights in a row must have some deeper significance. I'll try to get down as much as I can remember.
It begins with a world built like a giant metal onion, layer upon layer, each supporting those above it. I don't know how I know this, simply that I do. It's a wondrous construct, beautiful, intricate, the sort of thing an artificer dreams of.
Then it explodes.
It isn't clear what causes the explosion, just that it happens. And it is devastating. Forests of pipes collapse. An ocean of oil bursts into flame. The entire planet is annihilated in a matter of moments.
And yet, there is hope. A metal being, shaped like a stocky, silver human out of some forgotten filly tale, carries just a bit of that world in him. When the metal man becomes a planeswalker, he creates his own metal world, a simpler, more elegant design. He makes a single outer layer surrounding a brilliant core of pure magical energy.
But this world is stagnant, predictable. It's not a place, it's a sculpture, an equation. That's how the metal man wants it, artwork over environment. But unknowingly, he leaves a bit of the essence of the first metal world in his as he shapes it to his tastes.
One day, the metal man helps a woman realize her own destiny as a planeswalker, and the two leave his world to explore the rest of the Multiverse. He leaves behind a Warden to keep the world safe. The Warden takes into himself the essence of the first metal world, and he begins to improve his creator's design. Lazy sinusoidal rivers are reshaped into an expansive quicksilver sea. Tessellating wastes of hexagonal plates sprout literal blades of steel grass. Precisely calculated fractal shrubs give way to immense spires of verdigrised copper. Algorithmically formed mesas are supplanted by proud, rusting peaks that play merry havoc with magnetism. And seemingly of its own accord, a morass of rotting metal and corroding flesh suppurates into existence
The Warden populates his new world with creatures from throughout the myriad planes. All manner of animals, including the ancient horses, ancestors of ponykind. Mechanized life, built rather than born, yet no less alive for it. Mythical beings like humans and fantastic races undreamt of by equinity. All of them at least partly metallic, flesh transitioning to metal organically, seamlessly.
Before I can see more, I wake up. Is this the story of the oil? It feels... unfinished, somehow. Incomplete. How can I learn the rest? Surely, if I continue my research, I'll find the answers. The mice I've acquired from Fluttershy under the pretense of feeding Owloysius have provided a wealth of data, and yet nowhere near enough. I haven't ruled out pony experimentation, but nopony in his or her right mind would consent to the kinds of tests I want, no, need to perform. Except for me. Maybe I should drink a bit more? It doesn't smell as bad as it used to, or maybe I'm getting used to it...
Oh, and Applejack said something about a wounded timberwolf dying in the legs of Granny Smith. Ugh. Why can't the forces of darkness announce their encroachments ahead of time? Here I am, on the verge of a world-changing breakthrough, and this happens. Honestly, does terrorizing timberwolves even count as evil? It's the Everfree Forest. Who cares?
Urabrask's portal opened in the middle of a mountain, one not of pure iron but of stone, a substance foreign to New Phyrexia. Excavation began immediately, the new material a welcome addition to the Quiet Furnace. That humans turned to small horses and ogres to moose was inconsequential. The Great Work continued, no matter what shape its workers took.
Sheoldred's portal opened in a sodden bog. To most, it would be a paradise compared to the hellish conditions of the Mephidross. To the Whispering One, it was an unsightly, flesh-choked wasteland begging for phyresis, a plea she was eager to answer. Especially that poor, poor hydra. It would thank her after the infection ran its course.
Gitaxias's own gateway wasn't constrained to a single location like those he gave his siblings. If asked, he would claim that the equipment needed to manually select a destination would be too complex and require too much training for the other praetors to even bother with it. Like much of what the Augur of the Core said, it would have been largely true while omitting the most important point; it gave him a distinct advantage in compleating the pony plane.
As for Elesh Norn, her portal opened up in the very spot where the first Phyrexian set foot in Ungula. The oil Clinical Trial had spread on the grass had flourished in the mana-rich light of the sun and moon, hypertrophying the plant life, slowly converting vegetable matter into tarnished steel. In this surreal savannah congregated evangels of the Argent Etchings, eager to spread the Glorious Word to the uneducated equine masses. Priests of Norn marshaled the blessed crusade, consecrating their efforts in the name of the Grand Cenobite and the absent Father of Machines.
And one day, it was determined that their numbers were sufficient to finish the work the Gitaxian had begun in Ponyville.
Perhaps the greatest sign of the attack's severity was the reaction of the florist triplets. None of them fainted. None of them panicked. None of them commented on the horror. When the first ponies came running from the north with frantic tales of a monstrous invasion behind them, the three calmly and efficiently closed up shop for the day, barricaded their windows, and sealed themselves in the panic room in their basement. Prior to this final lockdown, Lilly thoughtfully hung a sign on the door:
Apocalypse in progress.
Closed until further notice.
Thank you for your patronage.
We told you so.
Other, less paranoid ponies were eagerly filling in for the trio in the blind panic department, running in every direction conceivable for every reason imaginable. A few even galloped towards the invaders, countless incidents of books misjudged by their covers making these optimists believe the alleged army to be simply misunderstood. After a few dangerously close impromptu manecuts, they reevaluated the situation, opting for the more popular strategy of fleeing for their lives.
A few others stood in place, unable to process what was happening. Among them, Rarity gazed at the tableau, horrified. Two-legged monstrosities with dripping blades for forelimbs and cat skulls for heads. Flapping blasphemies that were closer to jagged, malevolent kites than birds. Monstrous, hulking creatures that made Diamond Dogs seem pleasant by comparison. They had attacked her neighbors. They were coming for her town. And each and every one of them was...
"Ugly." Something stirred in the fashionista's soul. "UGLY." Something righteous and indignant, demanding expression. "UGLY!"
Her horn flared and tiny sapphires crystallized around her, elongated octahedrons like beautiful, glittering darts. She launched them into the marching hordes, and her beauty smote their hideousness. The avian parodies fell from the skies. The feline grotesques dropped where they stood. The ogreish brutes slowly crumbled, like collapsing mountains.
Rarity caught her breath and gasped at the bodies in her wake. "What... what have I done?" They had been monsters, yes, but even monsters were to be diverted, outthought, contained. Not... not slaughtered. She slumped to the ground, shaken by what she was capable of.
A bizarre sound like a trumpet with a head cold broke through the designer's revery. One of the massive beasts had survived and was charging at her, ignoring the blood and stranger ichors flowing from its many wounds.
Rarity sat petrified. Time slowed to a crawl. With the peculiar sensory acuity of the imminently deceased, she noted every spot of corrosion on the armor bolted to her assailant's flesh. She counted the rings of stained porcelain that encircled its strange, elongated snout. She even noticed some alien script inscribed on the head of the hammer as it swung towards her skull.
Then, in a burst of green and a strangled cry of pain, time resumed its normal course. The unicorn blinked, beholding the brute's body, now burnt and bested. Flames still licked at black patches of fluid, turning red and smoky.
As though from miles away, she heard an anxious, caring voice. "Are you okay, Rarity?"
She smiled. "All the better for your asking, my Spikey-Wikey."
"Rarity!" Twilight's voice rang out, underscored by her galloping hooves. She stopped next to her friend, panting a bit. "We came as soon as we heard. What happened?"
The alabaster mare shook her head. "I simply don't know. These terrible, terrible creatures came marching in from the north, sending ponies fleeing before them. Something about them just... oh it was dreadful, darling, simply dre— Wahaha!" She sprang up, cutting herself off as she beheld the other unicorn. "Twilight! By Celestia's wings, what happened to you?"
"Huh?" The student looked herself over and saw only brilliance. "What do you mean?"
"What do I mean?" Rarity began to pace around the purple pony as she rattled off answers. "Your tail looks like a limp dishrag, your mane is falling out at the roots, you look like you haven't seen a brush or a meal in days, and your eyes..." She shuddered.
"What about my eyes?" Twilight crossed them, trying to see for herself.
The fashionista conjured a mirror and held it up. "Twilight, the whites of your eyes have turned black at the edges."
"What?" The studious mare examined her reflection. "Huh. So they are. Peripheral discoloration of the sclera. That's a new one."
Rarity was less sanguine about the phenomenon. "'That's a new one'? You obviously have some sort of terrible illness. We need to get you to the hospital at once!"
Twilight smiled. She knew her friend meant well, she just didn't have all the information. That was easily fixed. "Oh, Rarity. It's nothing to worry about. It's probably just a harmless side effect of my current research."
This didn't seem to help. "Twilight, let me preface this by saying that I deeply regret having to resort to such measures."
The lavender mare backed up a few steps. "What are you—"
Before she could finish, a clump of her mane was enveloped in a sapphire aura and yanked out of her scalp. Rarity considered the brittle strands mournfully before turning back to her friend, waving her own hair in her face. "This," proclaimed the designer, "is not a harmless side effect. This is a betrayal of the elegance and refinement I have come to expect from you, Twilight Sparkle. This is a travesty, a shameful waste of your gifts of natural beauty."
"But I—"
"Spare me your excuses. You have clearly learned nothing from the incident last summer. Once again you have come across some arcane conundrum and are so busily trying to make sense of it that you don't even notice your own decent into monstrosity. Well I won't have it!"
Spike nodded. "She's right, you know."
Rarity turned to him. "And as for you!"
"Wha—?"
"I thought it was understood that you were responsible for preventing these episodes. What do you have to say for yourself, young dragon?"
"I tried!" he cried. "I tried everything short of setting her tail on fire! She wouldn't budge! I even made her favorite dessert!"
Twilight frowned in confusion. "When did you make Crêpes Suzette à la Dragon?"
"Last night! When I told you, you didn't even look up from the centrifuge!" Tears welled in the baby dragon's eyes. "You just said 'Uh huh' and told me to put scalpels on the shopping list." He clutched her foreleg. "You're losing yourself, Twilight. You need to come back to us."
Rarity put a hoof on her friend's shoulder. "He's right, darling. Whatever it is you're working on can't be as important as you seem to think it is."
Twilight looked from mare to dragon, looked inside herself, and didn't particularly like what she saw. "You're right. You're both right. Especially given the whole 'invading monsters' thing." She grinned. "Actually, I think I may have an idea about that. Rarity, could you have everypony meet me in the library in, oh, about an hour?"
The designer plastered a smile on her face as she backed away from the other mare. "Uh, why... certainly, dear. Did you mean everypony everypony, or just the girls?"
"Just the girls. And Spike, of course." Twilight registered her friend's expression. "What's wrong?"
"Eh heh, well, how do I put this delicately..."
Spike didn't bother. "Your tears are black." What? He was a guy. He'd already met his sap quota for the month.
"Really?" Twilight summoned a mirror of her own, seeing the twin black streaks that went down her cheeks. "Fascinating..." She noticed a glare from Rarity. "I mean, worrisome. How worrisome and not at all intriguing." She gave her best innocent smile. "See you in an hour! Come on, Spike."
In the Books and Branches Library, the Bearers of Harmony gathered around a short table. After explaining her current appearance and enduring her friends' chastisements, Twilight took a deep breath. "Now, I'm sure you're all wondering why I asked you all to come."
"You asked us?" questioned Pinkie Pie. "I thought Rarity had arranged an intervention." She pouted. "Darn it, now the cake's inaccurate."
The lavender unicorn frowned. "What cake?"
"This cake!" The party pony produced a purple pastry parallelogram depicting the six friends in a group hug, Twilight in the middle. Magenta icing spelled out "Happy Intervention Twilight!"
"When did you—"
"I keep cakes stashed everywhere in Ponyville."
Twilight gave a wan smile. "In case of cake emergency?"
The poofy-maned mare frowned in confusion. "What? No. The hay's a cake emergency? I just keep them around in case I have to organize a party on really, really, really short notice. I mean, what kind of party doesn't have cake?"
"Pinkie, dear," Rarity said gently, "an intervention isn't exactly a 'party' sort of get-together."
Rainbow Dash shrugged. "Yeah, but we've all said our piece at Twilight, and now we have cake. I say we eat it anyway."
"But it's not right," moaned Pinkie.
"Tastes the same no matter what's written on it," Applejack reasoned.
"I guess..."
Twilight frowned. "If we could focus on the real reason I asked you all here?" Her stomach offered a counterproposal. With a blush, the unicorn called, "Spike could you serve this, please?"
"Sure thing." The dragon came downstairs and hefted the sweet sheet into the kitchen.
"I'll help!" Pinkie cheered, bouncing after him.
"And make some tea while you're in there!" Celestia's student turned back to her fellow saviors of ponykind. "Now, I called you all here because it's clear that something terrible is going on. Between the abnormal behavior of the timberwolf at Sweet Apple Acres a few days ago and today's incursion by... whatever those things were, there's an obvious spike in strange and frightening events."
"What?"
Twilight resisted the urge to facehoof. "A statistical spike!"
"Oh. Okay!"
She returned to business. "Has anypony else heard about something unusual recently?"
"A lot of creatures seem to be fleeing the deeper parts of the Everfree Forest," noted Fluttershy. "They're displacing the gentler animals who normally live on the edges and around my cottage. I don't know what, but something has them all very scared."
Applejack frowned. "Jus' like that timberwolf."
"Could it a be a new dragon?" Twilight proposed.
Rarity shook her head. "Dragons don't have legions of unspeakably hideous monsters at their beck and call. At least, none that I've heard of."
"I have!"
All eyes turned to Pinkie Pie. "Weren't you helping with the cake?" asked Dash.
"Yeah, but Spike's got everything well in claw." The party pony grinned. "So, dragon with abomination armies? Yeah, that could be it. It isn't, but it could be. Kind of a shame, I haven't seen him for a couple years."
Twilight perked up. "Wait, you know what doing all of this?"
"Sure! Didn't I tell you guys about the giant evil science person I met last week?"
Four ponies shook their heads. One gaped at the earth mare. "You were serious about that?" exclaimed Rainbow Dash.
Pinkie beamed. "I'm always serious, Dashie! Except when I'm not!" She pouted. "And I did ask you tell everypony else."
"Y' kin tell us now, Pinkie," pointed out Applejack.
"Oh yeah! Well, once upon a time, there was a bunch of big meanies called the Phyrexians, who were big and nasty and ugly and half-metal and who didn't like anyone who wasn't like them. They were led by the biggest, meaniest big meanie of them all, who wanted to turn the whole wide Multiverse into Phyrexians. But one day there came a planeswalker named Urza, who swore everlasting vengeance on Phyrexia for corrupting his brother and making him kill him and also blow up a continent. For millennia, the hugegantonormous extra-meanie planned an invasion of Urza's home, and Urza planned a defense. When the invasion finally happened, it was all BOOM! ZOOM! KAFWOOM! RAWWWWR! GRARGHL-ZAAAARGH!" Pinkie then performed an elaborate series of gestures and sound effects that actually summarized the Phyrexian invasion of Dominaria quite effectively, provided one knew what to look for. To the other mares, it looked more like an epileptic fit with style.
After a final leap and "SHAZAM!", the cotton candy maned mare lay prone on the ground. Twilight risked a question. "So, what does this—"
The baker held up a forehoof. "Up up up! Not finished!" With a backwards somersault, she righted herself and continued. "So, Yawgmoth was destroyed, Phyrexia was wiped off the map, and Pernicious Deed became a tournament staple until it rotated out of Standard. The end!" She paused and frowned. "Except it wasn't the end, since apparently there's a New Phyrexia now."
"And that's what's attacking us?" asked Twilight.
"Looks like it."
"Another plane," muttered the purple unicorn. "An entire other universe, trying to invade us. Make us into them." She shivered. "What do we do?"
"Twi', as much faith as Ah have in ya," Applejack opined, "Ah think this one's just a bit outta yer league."
The student nodded. "You're right. I'm still just one pony. This is an issue for the Princesses to address. Spike!"
Her assistant entered from the kitchen, a serving tray in tow. "Yes, Twilight?"
"I need you to take a letter. This is vitally urgent."
"Just a second." He fetched a quill and parchment.
Seeing that the dragon was ready, Twilight began her dictation. "Dear Princess Celestia,
"You may have heard of unusual events occurring near Ponyville and the Everfree Forest. According to Pinkie Pie, this is nothing less than an invasion from another plane of existence. The invaders are horrific beings, half-flesh, half-metal, who want nothing more than to make us into more of them. The other Bearers of Harmony agree with me that the situation is beyond our capabilities as mortal ponies, even mortal ponies who wield one of the most powerful magics in our world. This requires nothing less than Luna and your direct intervention. Please reply posthaste. I fear for all of us.
"Your faithful student,
"Twilight Sparkle"
With a puff of flame the message was sent on its way. As it went, Fluttershy peeped up. "Um, Twilight?"
"Yes, Fluttershy?"
"Well, I know we were all concerned and maybe a bit angry at you for letting yourself go like you did, but I realized you never really got a chance to say why. Would you mind telling us what were you working on so intensely?"
"Not at all." Twilight developed a fond, distant look. "You see, about a week ago, I met a stallion. An incredible, wonderful stallion..."
"You did freaky experiments on yourself for a colt?" Dash exclaimed incredulously. "What kinda creep is this guy?"
"Now really, Rainbow," chided Rarity, "we've all done foolish things for love at one time or another." She frowned. "Though I do admit, nopony who would cause a mare to so degenerate sounds like a desirable beau."
Twilight shook her head fiercely "No, no, you've got it all wrong! It wasn't Clinical Trial who piqued my scientific interest, it was what he gave me." She floated one of the vials of oil up from the basement. "Specifically, this. This fluid is one of the most incredible magical substances I've ever seen. It's a symbiont that augments all aspects of a lifeform while feeding off extraneous matter to reproduce itself." This was met with blank looks and variations on "Uh..." She sighed. "It makes living things work better."
Dash perked up. "So this stuff'll make me even faster?"
"You'll be doing rainbooms in your sleep."
"Sign me up!" cried the pegasus.
Rarity gave the vial a thoughtful look. "'Extraneous matter,' you say. As in weight loss?"
Twilight frowned. "Well, yes, but you seem to be in great shape, Rarity."
The fashionista shrugged. "It's always good to have some contingencies in place, dear."
"Um, could..." Fluttershy swallowed nervously. "Could it be used as a medicine?"
"Um..." Twilight's thoughts went to inoculated rodents scratching at their own flesh, convulsing in agony, oil seeping out of their eyes. "It's kind of rough on the system at first," she admitted. "From what I've seen, it's best to apply it to a healthy specimen."
"I see." The pink-maned pegasus frowned, then locked eyes with her friend. "And how precisely did you learn that?"
The unicorn bit her lip, glancing from side to side. She soon caved under the pressure of the low-power Stare. "I... I'm sorry, Fluttershy. I misled you. Not all of the mice you gave me were for Owloysius."
The gentle mare sighed, and Twilight inexplicably felt she needed to apologize to her mother. "As long as you are through performing these experiments, I forgive you."
The student quickly objected. "But, but there's so much I still don't know about the substance!"
"Then you can learn it without needlessly harming yourself or others."
"I can tell you."
Once more everypony turned to Pinkie Pie, realizing that she had been silent since the fluid was unveiled. "What do you mean?" asked Twilight.
The pink pony took a deep breath. "You're right, Twilight, you just don't have the whole story. That stuff does make something stronger, faster, more durable, but there's a catch. See, in order for it to do all of that, it reshapes you, turns you into a monster in both body and mind. You see, that right there is glistening oil. The stuff of Phyrexia."
Twilight became the center of attention once more. She shook her head desperately. "No. No, that can't be true!"
"Actually," noted a stunned Applejack, "there was somethin' like that on the poor timberwolf."
"And that horrendous fiend Spike so valiantly defended me from," Rarity added.
"Then... then I'm..."
"Turning yourself into one of the enemy," finished Pinkie.
The purple unicorn was horrified, looking at her hooves like she'd never seen them before. "But... but I'm still me." She looked to her friends. "Aren't I?"
"Your eyes are black around the edges, Twi," Dash said ruefully.
"I... How could I... There has to be a cure! An antidote!" She brightened with newfound hope. "The Elements! They must be able to help."
Pinkie nodded, a smile returning to her lips. "Yeah! There's no way Harmony wants to be part of the giant metal death onion!"
Silence. After a moment, she added, "Old Phyrexia was a bunch of concentric spheres. I always called it the giant metal death onion."
Rainbow Dash hovered over the unicorn, trying to give a reassuring smile. "Don't worry, Twilight. We're here for you every step of the way."
"Thank you, Rainbow, that means a lot." The studious unicorn took a deep breath. "Alright. Everypony, get your Element. Time is of the essence."
The other bearers nodded, then made for the door. Twilight waved them farewell, a grateful smile on her face.
After a beat, the smile turned snide. "Well, their hearts are in the right places. In between their lungs." She gave a brief laugh at the non-joke, then turned to Spike. "Get Exploring the Æther for Fun and Profit."
He nodded mechanically, then droned, "At once."
Before even Rainbow Dash could return with her Element, the library glowed with a surreal blue light, then faded away. The ground was unblemished by any sign there had ever been a tree there, much less one converted into a public building.
Pinkie Pie said it best, once she returned. "Well, we're boned."
Megan 12, 5873
Sparkle's Log: Oh, my friends. My dear, innocent, well-meaning friends. I know you only want what's best for me. But like so many ponies, you simply don't know what that is. You don't even know what's best for yourselves. But your good friend Twilight does. Oh, you won't like it, not at first. Spike certainly didn't like the idea of me dominating his mind, but the funny thing about free will is that you don't feel any different without it. Unless I tell you to. Who said nothing constructive ever came of changelings?
Pinkie, for all of your experience and wisdom, you were wrong. I am not becoming a Phyrexian. I am Celestia's faithful student, the Bearer of Magic, most powerful unicorn of my generation. Do you really think I didn't have the metacognitive capacity to recognize the clumsy attempts to alter my thoughts? That I couldn't respond to them? Oh, trying to fight the changes would be an exercise in futility. The mice taught me that. But not even the oil expected me to work with it. Phyrexia, it seems, knows nothing of the magic of friendship. And that is how we will win. We will unite the strengths of both worlds into a single insurmountable whole.
No, none of you will be happy with what I've done at first. Assuming you even notice. I chose a strong, dark brew for a reason. After all, it wouldn't do if somepony noticed the color or flavor of the glistening oil in her cup. But in time, you will see. You will understand. You will thank me. And then we can work together and explore the magic of friendship as never before. The findings we will bring to Celestia won't just be the understandings we mortals gain through personal growth. They will genuine discoveries, insights into equine nature to which even she is not privy.
Celestia. Soon, soon we will be able to converse not as ruler and subject, not as teacher and student, but true equals. True friends. Have you ever had a true friend before? Luna doesn't count. She is your sister. I know that the bond between siblings is different from friendship. Deeper in many ways, yet shallower in crucial ones. Perhaps the closest was Star Swirl, but to you even he was little more than I: A clever pet, a living plaything in whom you could witness the joy of discovery forever barred to you by your own divine omniscience.
For you are omniscient, are you not? Surely you would appear before me in an instant, cleanse me or strike me down were this not your will. Just as with the unfortunate incident with Smarty Pants. Oh, what a misguided fool I have been. But soon, soon I will make you proud as never before. Soon another will be able to assuage a millennium of loneliness and regret. I do this for love, Celestia. For love of you, of my friends, of all of Equestria. No doubt you would do the same.
Hmm. Curious. My mind keeps returning to the theme of unity. It seems... appropriate. Yes, the bonds of friendship, of family, of knowledge and understanding will connect all of Equestria. Like the neurons in a brain, we will be countless units of a whole inexpressibly greater than the sum of its parts. Our friendships shall be as the synapses, our love as the neurotransmitters. Together our cogitation will be exponentially wiser than all the greatest individual minds of history put together. A thought occurs to me. A good thought. A wise thought. I will commit it to this log for posterity, for future generations, for the keystone of utopia that it truly is:
All will be one.
Rain of Fabulosity 1W
Instant
Rain of Fabulosity deals 1 damage to each attacking creature.
Hoofcraft — Rain of Fabulosity deals 2 damage to each attacking creature instead if you control three or more Ponies, Pegasi, and/or Unicorns.
"Against these foul invaders, beauty is one of our greatest weapons."
—Rarity, Bearer of Generosity
Timberwolf Blightpack 4G
Creature — Plant Wolf
Infect
Whenever Timberwolf Blightpack becomes blocked, it gets +1/+1 until end of turn for each creature blocking it.
Their favorite food is whatever gets in their way.
3/3