The Last Cutie Mark Crusader

by Jatheus


1 Cloudsdale Cadets

The start whistle blasted, shattering the calm of a spring day filled with puffy, white clouds lazily floating by. Before the echo even thought about subsiding, a hundred Pegasus ponies shot off from the starting line faster than lightning fills the sky. They were hurtling through an obstacle course at break-neck speed, dodging hoops, flying around markers, occasionally colliding, sending one or both parties spiraling to the cloud floor of the arena. Barely stopping to see if they were hurt, they would shoot back into the air, trying to regain lost time.

At twenty-first position, Scootaloo's wings were beating the air furiously. Her eyes were aflame with unbridled desire for victory. She zipped around a marker, through a hoop, and then a drop. She shot into twentieth, and then nineteenth position. She knew she didn't have much more, and she wasn't sure whether wanting to be first more than anybody else could help close the gap, but there wasn't time to think about that just now.

One of the ponies ahead, probably in the top ten, lost control and caused an accident. He spun wildly, unintentionally kicking one of the other racers as they attempted to pass. A third racer was caught in the fray as she tried to fly underneath them. All three spiraled down. That quickly, Scootaloo was in sixteenth position. She felt a little tired from the effort already, but pressed, passing another pony that slowed down from fatigue; fifteenth position now.

Scootaloo tried to focus on her breathing. With this kind of athletic exertion, not breathing properly is all it takes to send you falling to the deck. Inhale, hold it, exhale, hold it, inhale... It was an interesting rhythm, the breathing and the beating of the wings. They would synchronize when she paced herself. Her thoughts were broken as they came around the last sharp turn to the straightaway.

Every pony in front of her wasn't going to give up or make a mistake at this point. As Scootaloo rounded the turn, she shot ahead as fast as her wings would carry her. All of the others were sprinting as well, but this was Scootaloo's strength as a flier. Fourteenth position. Others were much more maneuverable, which is why she hadn't caught them yet, thirteenth, twelfth, but Scootaloo may have been the fastest of them all on a straightaway. Eleventh position, and still she pressed on. Tenth, and as Scootaloo shot into ninth position, she realized that her breathing was not synchronized, and she was becoming winded.

She ignored her body crying for rest, and decided to press to the finish line; she could see it. She put everything she had into a final burst of speed. Eighth place, seventh, sixth; she could see the dumbfounded expressions on the other ponies faces as she left them behind. Fifth, fourth; this was almost too easy. Third, second, and finally she achieved first place! All that was left was to maintain speed until...

...

The next thing Scootaloo knew she was looking up into the face of a monster. She began to panic, kicking wildly. She then realized that she was being held down by two other ponies, and it wasn't a monster. A field medic was checking her for injury.

Scootaloo asked, "Did I win?"

The medic had a very stoic look that somehow resembled anger. She heard one of the others laugh. It was Cloud Blazer, "Did I win, she says?" and he laughed again. Cloud Blazer was a brown Pegasus pony with some white patches and a darker brown mane. His eyes were emerald green. When the direct sunlight would hit him, it would reveal reds in his mane. Like Scootaloo, he had moved to Ponyville while much younger, and he had been taken in by the Cutie Mark Crusaders. They were the only two Pegasus ponies, and after Cloud Blazer helped teach her how to fly, they became very close friends. Unlike Scootaloo, he got his cutie mark, a white cloud with a fireball blasting through it, before they left Ponyville to take combat flight training at the Wonderbolt Military Academy. Equestria was at war. Nearly a year ago now, hordes of timberwolves had come out of the southern end of the Everfree Forest. A group of ponies led by Princess Twilight Sparkle had stemmed the tide, but it only bought them a little time. The entire Canterlot Guard was deployed to assist, but they were overwhelmed by sheer numbers. Apple Loosa was the first to fall, followed by Dodge Junction, but the Guard was able to hold off the timberwolves long enough to evacuate the most of the citizens. During that time, the princesses were able to deploy enough Unicorn ponies to the remaining cities in an effort to get protective shields up. Nowhere else had to be evacuated, but food shortages had already begun with the loss of so much farmland. Princess Celestia put out a call for every able-bodied pony that was willing to fight to assemble for training. Since it is on an island, and therefore much more defendable, Manehattan was the logical choice for the earth and unicorn ponies. The Equestria Guard Academy was built there, and available Pegasus ponies have been ferrying prospective trainees to Manehattan ever since. The Pegasus ponies were able to freely travel, and assembled very quickly in massive numbers. Cloudsdale was chosen to host all of the Pegasus trainees, and the Wonderbolt Military Academy was established.

Still stoic, the medic said, "You'll be fine." With that, they let her up, and the medics flew off to check on other injured ponies. Scootaloo sat half up and looked around to see the track above her was completely empty, and she was still short of the finish line. She laid back down to allow herself a moment of despair; her head was throbbing.

"Well, you fell a hundred feet after hyperventilating, and somehow you didn't manage to break anything. I'd call that a win," Cloud Blazer teased.

"You know what I meant," Scootaloo snapped at him.

"Oh, the race?" he mocked, "No, you lost that. Completely. I think you managed to come in behind last place."

She sighed, and then rolled over to get on her hooves. "How long was I out?"

"Oh, not that long, just a few minutes. You really had us worried when you didn't jump back up like most everypony else does." He was genuinely concerned.

Exhausted and humiliated, she started walking off.

"Where are you headed now?"

Without stopping, she said, "To get cleaned up."

He pranced up to keep pace with her, "Are you alright, Scoot?"

She hated it when he called her that, but she was too tired to argue, "I'll be fine. See you at dinner, Brownie."

He didn't mind the nick-name. He stopped and watched her walk away for a moment. Then he turned and took flight, lazily heading to the score board. He saw the medics had finished up with their work, and they were resting by a group of drill sergeants. They were all huddled near the score board, probably discussing the fate of the cadets. He could see the Wonderbolt colonel in command. She was a blue mare with a mane in the colors of a rainbow. She was the only Pegasus, so far, ever to create a sonic rain-boom. It was an amazing thing to have a living legend like Rainbow Dash be your trainer.

Not watching where he was going, Cloud Blazer slammed into the scoreboard, tried to catch himself, but was too high with nothing to grab, and he fell down. He wasn't hurt, but when he heard the roaring laughter of the drill sergeants, he was more than a bit embarrassed. One of them called out, "You okay over there?"

He sheepishly replied, "Yes, sir. Sorry, sir." Thankfully, they went back to talking amongst themselves. He searched the scoreboard for his name and rank. For this course they just did, he came in twenty-third place. "Not bad," he said to himself. He then noted that Sparklefly was first place, again. He then turned to the overall leader board. He had advanced overall to twelfth place. He searched for Scootaloo's name. She had been eighth this morning, but given the score from this race, she had dropped to fifteenth. He was in a bit of wonder for a moment that the top ponies were that close in score that she could lose position so quickly when his thoughts were broken by a voice, "Cloud Blazer, right?"

He turned to see Rainbow Dash talking to him, and he panicked a little, "Oh, me? Yes sir! er, ma'am? Yes sir, ma'am?" he fumbled.

"Ma'am is fine. You are Scootaloo's friend from Ponyville, right?"

He wasn't sure whether to be afraid for Scoot or not, "Yes ma'am, I mean, sort of. I mean, we're having dinner together, ma'am." Rainbow Dash was a bit amused at his manner, but he misread her expression, "No, not like that, ma'am. We're not... I mean, we're just friends ma'am. We eat in the mess hall, ma'am."

"Look, I know you're nervous, but try to calm down. You're not in trouble. I just wanted to ask if you'd tell Scootaloo to come find me when she has a chance."

Relief flooded him, "Yes ma'am. Of course, ma'am; I'll tell her."

"Thanks, kid." Rainbow Dash and the other drill sergeants headed off toward the officer's mess.

Relief slowly turned to curiosity and then concern. What could Rainbow Dash want with Scootaloo? Maybe she was concerned at Scootaloo's fall today. In any case, he wouldn't be able to find Scootaloo before dinner, so he began gliding to the southeast corner of Cloudsdale. There was a place right on the edge that he called his thinking spot. He and Scootaloo would go there sometimes and reminisce. On a clear day, you could see Canterlot, and the outline of the Everfree Forest. Sometimes, they'd both swear they could see Ponyville as well.

As he sat on the edge, the ground below looked alive with timberwolves. There must have been thousands upon thousands of them. So many that they were massed on top of each other, covering the ground like grass is supposed to. Even at this height, the stench of the timberwolves wafted up and could be faintly detected in the air. They were perfectly safe in Cloudsdale, but it was an unsettling sight. On such a very peaceful day in the clouds, the mass of timberwolves below served as a stark reminder that there were storms that still raged below.

...

Sparklefly took her ration and found a seat with her squad. She was pleased with her performance, but concerned for Scootaloo. She’d have to check on her later. Other thoughts began to fill her mind. It had been a year since the battle at Apple Loosa. One year since the town had been taken by the timberwolves. One year since her father had charged headlong into battle and never returned. She shuddered at the thought and tried to clear it from her mind.

“I’m with you,” Treble Cleft said, “These oats are stale.”

“These are oats?” Cherry Blossom asked.

“Yeah, but at least the company is good,” Treble Cleft added and winked at Sparklefly.

She felt herself smile in spite of everything.

“Easy,” she replied, “I’m on my way to becoming an officer.”

“Oh, I won’t forget to salute,” the amorous stallion quipped.

Sparklefly shook her head. Treble Cleft had seemed rather interested in her since the first day of their training. It was flattering, but she didn’t have time for such things. The timberwolf crisis had taken it’s toll on Equestria. More than that, Sparklefly had her family to think about. Her dad left her with the responsibility of taking care of them. Between a growing food shortage and lack of work, joining the military seemed the best way to accomplish that.

“I think this is hay,” Cherry Blossom mocked the food.

“Are you sure? It tastes more like dandelions,” Sky Burst added.

Treble Cleft snorted, “That would explain the texture.”

“It’s a small matter what it actually is,” Sparklefly interjected. “I’m just glad it doesn’t taste like old mattress today.”

She was trying to let her heavy thoughts go for a while and join in the banter with her squad. It did seem to help her feel better.

...

Scootaloo was ambling into the mess hall. She saw Sparklefly motioning her to sit with her squad, but she passed on and found a spot that was more or less away from everypony else and tried to ignore them all. She attempted not to overhear how excited some of them were for how they had advanced today. She didn't have much of an appetite, but ate anyway. Completely lost in thought, she was staring into her plate and unaware when Cloud Blazer came in and sat down across from her. She finally noticed him and looked up.

"Are you okay?" he asked her.

"I just can't believe I fainted earlier."

"Oh, well, you didn't really faint. You hyperventilated. Everypony does that at least once when they're trying to fly too fast."

"I wasn't flying too fast!"

"I just meant that you lost your rhythm, that's all."

She stared quietly at her plate for a moment, then asked, "So how bad is my score now?"

He hesitated, "Well, the top ponies are all really close. Overall, you dropped a little bit, just to fifteenth place." He could see her despair, "But fifteenth out of a hundred in our company is really good," it wasn't helping. "Besides that, our training isn't finished yet; there's still time for you to get back on top."

"Just forget it."

"What?"

"Never mind." Scootaloo's mood was bordering on complete despair.

She was the oldest pony she had ever even heard of that didn't have her cutie mark. She pretended not to care anymore, but it was just a façade. She still felt that there was some secret about herself that she couldn't figure out, and until she did, her cutie mark wouldn't appear. The thing that made it even more frustrating was that if she knew what her cutie mark was, it would probably give her a hint as to what she was supposed to be good at, and who she was. It's not something that anypony else seemed to understand. Her friends, Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle both have had their cutie marks for years now. If how long it took Scootaloo to learn to fly was any indication, she feared she may never get her cutie mark. When the war broke out, she came to the Wonderbolt Military Academy to help save Equestria. When she saw how good of a flyer she was becoming, she'd been certain her cutie mark would follow. She pushed harder and harder, always outperforming and trying to be the best, but still no cutie mark.

They finished dinner in silence. Cloud Blazer didn't speak again until they were about to leave, "Oh, I am supposed to tell you that Colonel Dash is looking for you, when you have time."

That got Scootaloo's attention, "Rainbow Dash?"

"Yes, she's looking for you; she didn't say why."

Scootaloo raced out of the mess hall, and then composed herself, restricting her speed to a trot. The setting sun had turned all of Cloudsdale into brilliant shades of gold. As she approached the office, she began getting nervous. This was the first time in almost two months of training that Rainbow Dash had asked to see her.

"Hey, Scootaloo, wait up!" Scootaloo turned around to see a silver mare with pale blue eyes that matched her mane trotting up behind her. It was Sparklefly, lead pony in her cadet squad. Scootaloo stopped and waited for her.

"What do you want?" Scootaloo asked defensively.

"I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I feel like you've been avoiding me," she replied innocently.

"Well, I'm fine, aside from being farther from your top score; now go away."

A little hurt, Sparklefly said, "I'm not here to gloat-"

"What, are you going to give me more flying tips?" Sparklefly was always trying to be helpful to others. Sometimes this came across as very annoying, especially to Scootaloo.

Sparklefly calmly continued, "A lot of us are really concerned about you." Scootaloo didn't know what to say. Sparklefly continued, "You're not in this alone; we're all training together. We're a team."

Scootaloo's pride was bruised from the events of the day, but she realized now that Sparklefly was being honest with her and that she genuinely wanted to help. Scootaloo looked passed her into the sunset. The last golden rays of sunlight were just shining above the horizon, and then it was gone. Day had faded into twilight, and the air felt much cooler now. The fluffy cloud floor beneath Scootaloo's feet was warm and moist.

She finally looked back at Sparklefly, "Thanks," she paused, uncertain what to say. "I'm going to be alright, really. We'll talk more later, okay?"

Sparklefly seemed almost relieved, "I'd like that. See you then."

"Later," Scootaloo said as Sparklefly walked away.

You almost hate some ponies because they are so naturally good at everything. Sparklefly was one of those, at least when it came to flying. It seemed as though every stage of their combat flight training was designed for her to show off her abilities. The most frustrating part was how humble Sparklefly was about her own talents. She never bragged or boasted, but always tried to encourage others to do better. She and her family had been in Apple Loosa when the first wave of timber wolves overran the town. Her dad had been part of the Royal Guard before he had retired and taken up farming. He and her mother married later in life and had three fillies and two colts. Sparklefly was the oldest. They were working their orchard when the bells rang out, sounding the alarm. After making sure his family was on the train, her dad flew into the battle to help the Canterlot Guard, which had arrived to defend the city. Sparklefly had begged to help her father, but he told her she had to protect the family. She'd heard later that the group that her father fought with became surrounded. Even after the defenders from the other positions had retreated, and the commander had died, her father took command and continued fighting until they were all overwhelmed and killed. Sparklefly was the first to arrive at Cloudsdale when the call went out for able-bodied ponies to train for combat. It somehow sounded glorious when told like that, but that was no comfort to the family he left behind.

Scootaloo took a breath, still a little nervous to see Rainbow Dash, and pushed the door open. There were several rows of desks and tables, and the walls were covered with charts and maps. Cadets didn't often come inside. This was where all of their training was planned. Every obstacle course and scenario that they worked through had originated in this place. At the end of the room was an open door, and Scootaloo could see Rainbow Dash sitting at her desk with some paperwork. Scootaloo walked inside and approached the open door, almost holding her breath. She stood there for a few moments, watching Rainbow Dash pour over her work. As she turned a page, Rainbow Dash looked up and saw Scootaloo standing in the doorway. She waved a hoof to call her in, and looked back to her papers. Scootaloo walked in and sat down next to the desk.

Rainbow Dash pushed aside her paperwork and said, "How are you feeling?"

"Just fine, ma'am; couldn't be better."

Rainbow Dash pushed one of the papers on the desk, "You're not hurt at all from that fall you took today?"

Scootaloo struggled to not be defensive, "No ma'am, the medics checked me out, and I'm fit to fly, ma'am."

"That's a relief. Not many could take a fall like that and walk away without even a scratch."

"Just lucky this time, ma'am."

Rainbow Dash watched Scootaloo for a moment, "You were eighth place this morning, and I see you've dropped down to sixteenth."

"Fifteenth place, ma'am," Scootaloo corrected her.

"Yes, fifteenth. Look, Scootaloo, I know you've worked really hard to be this close to the top, and you've really done a great job. You don't anything to be ashamed of."

"I just have to push myself a little harder, ma'am."

"That's not what I meant." Rainbow Dash stood up and walked around the desk to sit beside Scootaloo. "Pushing yourself isn't your problem. Scootaloo, you probably work harder than any pony I've ever seen. What you need is to learn to pace yourself just a little bit. I mean, giving a hundred percent is admirable and all, but if you push so hard that you don't have the strength to finish what you're doing it doesn't count."

"It's just, I... I just need to win, ma'am."

"This isn't about winning." Scootaloo was shocked at hearing that. "When we're out there, you don't fight alone. You'll be part of a team, and every pony in the team depends on every other. If you fall out in combat like you did today, what do you think would happen?"

Scootaloo shifted very uneasily. She couldn't find any words to reply, and she could feel tears trying to well up behind her eyes. It was all she could do to choke them back so they didn't spill out.

Rainbow Dash spoke softly, trying to be gentle, "We wouldn't leave you behind. It would take two of us to drag you out of danger, and that puts even more of us at risk. Do you understand what I'm telling you?"

Scootaloo swallowed hard, "Yes, ma'am. I need to pace myself, ma'am; even if that means I can't be the best."

"All anypony can ask of you is to be the best that you can be. You don't have to be better than everypony else."

Scootaloo couldn't let that go; something akin to a flash of anger shot through her, "If you don't mind my saying so, ma'am, that's easy for you to say. You are better at everything than everypony else, ma'am."

Rainbow Dash seemed a little more guarded with her posture now, "Is there something else that is bothering you?"

Scootaloo instinctively cast a fleeting glance to her flank, and then she tried to look away, but it was too late. Rainbow Dash saw it.

Rainbow Dash walked to the door and closed it, "Anything said from this point is off the record, okay?"

Scootaloo nodded, the tears were working their way passed her defenses.

"It's okay that you don't have your cutie mark yet. It doesn't matter."

The tears flowed hot and fast, and Scootaloo practically screamed, "How can you say that? How can you tell me that?" Her voice was cracking, "You've had your cutie mark for years; everypony gets them when they're little! But not me! I'm... I... I just..." the sobbing was uncontrollable at this point. Rainbow Dash put a hoof over her shoulder for comfort. Scootaloo cried it out for a little while, eventually degrading into quiet sobbing. She finally broke the silence calmly, "I've seen everypony else I know get their cutie marks. Apple Bloom, and Sweetie Belle, even Cloud Blazer, and every other pony in school below me back in Ponyville. When I learned how to fly, and everypony saw how fast I could go, I was just sure I'd get my cutie mark for flying. I don't know what I'm supposed to do, or be good at, or who I'm supposed to be. That's what cutie marks tell us, right? They tell everypony what makes us special? Well, what makes me special? I'm great at flying, but if it's not that, then what is it?"

"I'm not going to lie to you, Scootaloo. I don't know why you haven't found your cutie mark yet. All I can tell you is that pursuing it is not the way. Whether it comes, when it comes, these aren't things you can control." Scootaloo looked at Rainbow Dash, a little pitiful, but somewhat comforted. "Tell you what; I'll make you a deal. You learn to focus on the things you can control, like pacing yourself, and doing what's best for your team, and anytime you need to talk, my door is open. How does that sound?"

Scootaloo considered this for a moment, and then nodded. The tears had slowed.

"Alright, now go get cleaned up before you hit your rack. Lights out in a half-hour." Rainbow Dash gave Scootaloo a little squeeze on her shoulders before letting go.

"Thanks Rai- I mean, ma'am," she said as she straightened up.

"Anytime, Scoo- I mean, cadet," Rainbow Dash said with a smile.

Scootaloo left the office at a slow trot back to the barracks. It certainly had been the most full day she'd had in quite a while. She went from the glory of near victory, through the pain of complete failure, and finished it off with an emotional release that left her feeling completely drained. A good night's sleep would be just the thing to take care of this. Unfortunately, not a pony in all Cloudsdale would sleep on this particular night...