//------------------------------// // 7. Dear Discord, Are you trying to hurt me? // Story: Seven Scrolls For Discord // by Lise //------------------------------// When the door to Discord's house swung open with a bang, the draconequus knew what would follow. There was only one creature in existence that destroyed first and felt guilty about it later. "Hello, Luna," he said with a deep sigh. The two had successfully avoided each other as much as possible since his return, and with very good reason. "WHAT IS THIS I HEAR?!" The Princess of the Night stormed in. "Oopsie?" Discord mustered his most innocent look. Discussing his love correspondence with Luna wasn't the best of ideas... especially since an email correspondence was the reason she ended up marrying him. "Look, I'm sure there is a good explanation for every—" "HOW DARE YOU DEPRESS OUR DAUGHTER?!" Luna shouted to his face. "THE POOR CHILD IS SUFFERING AS IT IS! SHE HAD TO GO BACK TO THE MOON JUST TO GET AWAY FROM YOU!" "Wait, what?" Discord blinked. A second later he frowned. Another second and he crossed his arms. "Deliria? She's gone back to the moon, has she? Well, it's hardly my fault she took your lousy personality — always sighing and brooding about things. Maybe it had to do with, I don't know, taking her to the moon for a thousand years?!" "SHE WAS CAST IN STONE!" Luna stoned her hood on the ground. "WHICH ONLY HAPPENED BECAUSE YOU HAD TO HAVE A TANTRUM ABOUT YOUR STUPID DOLL COLLECTION!" "Action figures!" Discord hissed. "And it's not like the ponies minded. You know, what?" He closed his eyes massaging the bridge of his nose. "Just forget it! You said your part. I'll go to the moon in a bit and talk to her. Okay?" "This is precisely the reason we don't talk anymore!" Luna snorted, yet in a more civil voice. "It was a mistake thinking anything would change! Talk to her! And if I find out she is still miserable, I'll be back!" The Princess stomped on the floor again, causing several paintings to fall off the walls and onto the ceiling. "Fiiine." Discord grumbled. "Say hello to Screwball for me," Luna said, walking towards the exit. "And congratulate her on her choice of wife. Rainbow Dash is a most excellent partner. Also, do try to be civil at the wedding." "Yes, I'll be civil at... what?!" Discord wanted to ask more, but Luna had already flown off. "Did she tell all of Equestria?! How fast is Rainbow Dash exactly? And why am I the last to learn of this?" Annoyed, he glanced at the table. A single scroll remained. "I might as well." The draconequus took it. "Things could hardly get any worse." Dear Discord, Are you trying to hurt me? Seriously, are you? I poured my heart out in that letter and what do you do? Flood the town with a mass response! You didn't even bother to change the text! When I first got it, I was the happiest mare alive! I really thought you had finally caught on. Five minutes later I hear my roommate laughing her flank off, because she has received an identical letter. Do you even know how that made me feel? You really are painful to love, you know that? Well, I don't care! Despite everything I still love you, you silly thing. Oh stars, at times I wish I didn't, but it's something I can't control. You never did see me at the Gala, did you? Nopony sees me at the Gala. I guess in part that's my job. Also, please forgive me for the things I said about Princess Celestia and Fluttershy. I don't know what came over me. Just jealousy, I guess. I know things are going well between you. The Princess often mentions how glad she is you are back to what you were, when you two were married. Fluttershy also deeply cares for you as a friend, but she has indeed confided that you are coming on a tad too forceful at times. You really haven't had much experience with friends, have you? That's what happens when you like chaos more than anything else. You were right about my love life, or the lack of such. It really is complicated. You see, I've been staying at a place with this mare for a while. She’s nice and everything, but she obviously has a thing for me, and I don't have the courage to tell her I'm into stallions. Mostly it's been only innocent flirting, the occasional peck on the cheek — all things I can ignore. Lately, however, she has started upping her game. The hugs have been getting more intense, and a few days ago she even nibbled my ear. I so fear I'll break her heart. That's why I finally found the courage to write to you. That, and some good advice I got from a friend. Believe me, it wasn't easy! I had to bribe Princess Twilight's dragon by arranging for a table for two in the most expensive restaurant Ponyville has. I even had to provide the music itself before he agreed. In the long run, it was worth it, though. I finally got to tell you how I feel, as well as hear back from you. Although you still don't have the foggiest who I am, do you? (No, don't feel bad, it's all right.) Nice try, but I happen to know your daughters quite well, and am aware Screwball isn't the least bit interested in getting lessons from me. Also, I know that she prefers Fluttershy to me as a potential stepmom. Nonetheless, I could describe our relations as warm and amicable. We are so very different, after all. She knows perfectly well, I cannot possibly take Princess Celestia's place. We both do. I'm not sure I'll write anymore. Maybe it's better this way, or maybe it isn't — only time will tell. Regardless, I am glad I did, even if I sounded like a maniac in the first letter. Mother always told me I dream too big for my own good. What could I say? Under this cold exterior beats the heart of a dreaming romantic. Goodbye, Discord. Take care of yourself. And if you come to the next Gala, if you could, keep an eye open for me. Always waiting, A mare that loves you. "This is a joke," Discord said, yet found himself incapable of looking away from the words. "It must be a prank! Somepony got the date wrong and..." He sighed heavily. After so many centuries, somepony who loved him had appeared again. This was horrible, of course! The last few times this had ended in utter disaster! The divorces were messy and what followed — ten times so. Frankly, he was lucky to be walking about. "There's no way in Tartarus, I'm going through that again!" The draconequus threw the scroll across the room. "Not in a million—" A knock sounded on the door. "Of course!" Discord lifted his forelimbs to the ceiling annoyed. "Interrupt me when I'm in the middle of a life defining rant, why don't you?!" Another knock followed. "Oh, for chaos's sake, Deliria! Just teleport in like a normal being!" He shouted, heading towards the door. "How many times have we been through this? As long as you live in this house, you shall follow no set rules!" He gripped the handle, tearing the door off its hinges. "Deliria, when will you stop acting like a—" The sentence remained unfinished. Much to Discord's amazement, there was a pony standing at his porch — a real, unadulterated, a hundred percent normal earth pony. Her dark mane almost blended with the darkness outside, making her light grey coat stand out. "Um." The mare started hesitantly, looking away. "Deliria told me you're home," she adjusted her bow tie, "so I decided just to come see where it was you lived. She has spoken so much about your home." Another pause. "It's almost like I I've lived here, myself. " A tense laugh followed. Discord just kept on staring at her, very much uncertain how to react. "This is wrong." The pony closed her eyes, shaking her head slightly as she did so. "I shouldn't have come here. It was foolish, and I should have know better. You are obviously quite busy and..." her words trailed off. Slowly she took a deep breath, then opened her eyes again, looking straight at Discord's. "Might I come in?" "Please, by all means." Discord moved aside so she could pass. "I was just thinking of having some nice tea to go along with your melody."