For the first time in many years, the mood around the Apple family table was subdued.
Applejack looked up from her cold meal every so often to throw a glare, alternating between her promiscuous brother and his questionable fiancée.
Big Mac, for his part, sat rather quietly, possibly deep in thought… or just genuinely silent as he was so often wont to do.
Trixie sat nervously picking at the cold apple-and-carrot stew. She had tried to levitate the spoon to her mouth with her magic, but after a stern gaze from the ultra-traditionalist Granny Smith, decided to struggle through eating the traditional earth pony way.
Twilight—having no trouble eating earth pony style—graciously ate the offered meal.
“Ah don’t get it,” Apple Bloom said, breaking the silence.
“What don’tcha get, sugarcube?” Applejack asked.
“How is Miss Trixie havin’ a foal?”
Silence resumed.
“Ah mean, Granny Smith told us that ya can only have a foal if yer married.”
“Well, that’s not—” Twilight stopped herself when she noticed Granny Smith’s dark gaze.
“Well… uhhh…” Applejack fumbled for words.
“You wonder how Trixie is having a foal without being married, yes?” Trixie asked, watching Apple Bloom. When the filly nodded, Trixie continued. “Well, Trixie has not yet had her foal, has she?”
“No…” Apple Bloom answered, unsure.
“And Big Mac has proposed to Trixie, to which Trixie generously accepted.” Trixie paused, waiting for Apple Bloom to process what she was saying. “And Trixie presumes Trixie will be wed to your brother before Trixie’s foal is born—”
“Darn tootin’!” Granny Smith called, bringing her hoof down hard on the table, causing all the plates to jump.
“Then Trixie will be married when she has her foal. Yes?”
Apple Bloom nodded, then smiled. “Oh, Ah get it now! Thanks, Miss Trixie!”
“Trixie is always happy to share her knowledge,” Trixie replied, nodding her head towards the filly.
“Now, no more talk or questions about foals,” Granny Smith chided the filly. “Eat up, an’ then it’s bedtime.”
Applejack glowered at Trixie throughout the rest of the meal.
“Ah don’t appreciate ya lyin’ t’ mah little sister like that,” Applejack growled as soon as Apple Bloom left the room.
“Trixie did not lie,” Trixie retorted with a wave of her hoof. “Trixie only carefully engineered the accuracy of her answer… massaged the facts… teased the truth, a little…” Trixie shrugged. “Would you have preferred Trixie tell your sister how it really happened?”
“Uhhh,” Applejack stammered.
“And your Granny obviously has not told your sister the truth,” Trixie said, pointing an accusing hoof towards Granny Smith. “Why do you blame Trixie for only bending the truth?”
The clinking of glass snifters broke the uncomfortable silence. Big Mac placed them in the center of the table, along with a dusty, unlabelled bottle. He uncorked it, and poured a small amount in each glass.
“A foal is s’posed ta be a blessing,” Big Mac said as he slid a glass to each pony at the table. “So Ah propose a toast. T’ the newest Apple in the orchard… Oh… an’ t’ mah fiancée,” he added sheepishly.
Granny Smith graciously accepted hers, as did Twilight. Applejack stared at the offered glass, but took it with some hesitation. Trixie practically dove towards her drink.
“Wait! No!” Twilight shouted, levitating the glass away from Trixie.
“Why—” Trixie turned to Twilight. “—do you hate Trixie so much? What has Trixie ever done to deserve this?” Applejack let out a harsh bark. “Don’t answer that,” Trixie huffed.
“Trixie, it’s not anything you’ve done. Alcohol is dangerous for a foal at this stage. Fetal alcohol syndrome is a real danger. And there are plenty of other things you will have to avoid, as the dangers of listeria infection are more pronounced. Soft cheeses—”
“Not Trixie’s soft cheeses! Trixie needs her soft cheeses. Even when Trixie was at her lowest, Trixie still indulged in soft cheeses.”
“No soft-serve ice cream, in fact it’s probably better to avoid ice cream altogether.” Twilight continued to list off dangers to the foal. “Eggs are okay, so long as they’re well cooked. There are a lot of raw foods you should avoid, though considering you aren’t a griffon, a lot of those don’t apply to you—”
“Trixie has nothing left to live for!” Trixie bemoaned.
“To our foal,” Big Mac called out over Trixie’s wailing, and Twilight’s lecturing.
“To the foal,” Applejack and Granny Smith echoed as they raised their glasses.
“To the— Oh wait!” Twilight said. Her horn glowed, and Big Mac watched his precious calvados float away. “Most partners opt to forgo the same foods that their partners must abstain from, as a show of solidarity. A recent paper published out of Canterlot University showed an increase in the health and well-being of a relationship where the father shared the burden of childbearing with the mother where he can.”
“That so?” Applejack asked. “If’n that’s the case, pass ‘er here. Ain’t no need t’ let any of the calvados go t’ waste!”
The two now-free glasses levitated towards Applejack and Granny Smith. Both Granny Smith and Applejack poured the already generous amount of brandy into their own glasses. When Applejack made to top off Twilight’s glass, she refused at first, but relented as the smell of the brandy filled her nostrils.
“To the foal!” Twilight, Granny Smith and Applejack called, before lifting the amber liquid to their mouths.
“Oh, and to Big Mac and Trixie,” Twilight added as an afterthought.
“To Big Mac an’ Miss Trixie,” Granny Smith added. “May they plant many more in the Apple orchard!”
Applejack coughed as she drank. That was one thought she could have done without.
“Nnsnse,” Twilight slurred as she staggered towards the door. “I’m still good to fly… or teleport… Ooooh, I wonder if I could combine those two?”
“Yer stayin’ here an’ that’s final! Ya don’t wanna end up with another MUI, do ya?”
Princess Twilight regally stumbled and landed rump up. Regally.
“P’rhaps tha’s for th’ bess,” Twilight admitted as Applejack helped her to her hooves.
“Trixie still needs to get back to Trixie’s wagon,” Trixie added, pretty much ignored by the two other mares.
“Nnsnse!” Twilight called out. “Trixie will have to stay here, too.”
“Really, Twi?” Applejack gave Twilight a flat look. “Ya can’t jus’ go an’ invite Trixie inta mah home.”
“Act-ally, I cannn,” Twilight replied. “Royal pri-village. Technclly, I own all o’ th’ land ‘round Ponyvlle.”
“Wut?”
“Yep-p, as… as Ponyvlle ‘s th’ seat of my powar, I technclly own all th’ land ‘round in it.”
“Where is Trixie going to sleep?” Trixie asked, once again mostly ignored by the two mares.
“That’s a good question, Twi,” Applejack responded, directing another glare at Twilight. “We only have one guest bedroom.”
“We jus’— we jus’ hafta build… another farmhouse…” Twilight waved her hoof out towards the darkened night. “Out there. Then we’ll have enough rooms.”
“Build another… good gravy, Twi, ya really are a lightweight.”
“Ooo! We could have a sleepover!” Twilight clapped her hooves together, undeterred, before losing balance and falling over again. “Trixie… do you prefer same way or top-and-tail?”
“Trixie wonders… if there are any other options,” she said, casting a pleading glance towards Big Mac. Big Mac replied with a shrug.
“We ain’t be havin’ no more o’ that, missy,” Granny Smith growled. “Not ‘til yer married good ‘n’ proper.”
“It’s not like Trixie can get… double pregnant—” Trixie huffed. She paused, then turned to Twilight, who was still laid out on the floor. “—wait… can she?”
“Only erly on in th’ pregancy, if there’s ‘nother ovlation, there’s a teeny chance you’d have fratrnl twins. But by now, yer cycle woulda stopped an’ you’d have a mucus plug ‘n yer server-ix that stops any mor’ sper-mato-zoa from entring th’ utrus. S’ this far ‘long…?” Twilight called out from the floor. “Nnnope!”
“That… is far more than Trixie ever desired to know.”
“Ooooh, I have s’ many books in my new libary! Have you ever seen a placnta? I have… hic slides.” Twilight giggled as she got back up. “So icky and squishy and gross… nature’s so fascinatin’!”
“Double pregnant or not, we don’t encourage that kind of behavior in this household!”
“Come on, yer highness. Th’ two’a ya need yer rest.” Granny Smith ushered both Twilight and her granddaughter-in-law-to-be upstairs.
Applejack glowered at her brother when it was only the two of them left in the room.
“Yer gunna be th’ death of me, ya know?”
Trixie wondered how anypony in the house could sleep. Somepony had replaced the alicorn next to her with a fully matured, sleeping dragon. At least, that’s what she presumed had happened.
Any time Twilight would roll onto her back, she would splay out her wings, flicking Trixie in the face. Then the snoring would start. Oh goddess, the snoring!
Trixie would just about drift off to sleep, when her bed companion would roll over and start snoring again. Each time, a ‘gentle’ hoof to the princess’s ribs would cause the alicorn to roll over, and Trixie would be treated with blessed, blessed silence.
Then the alicorn would roll over again.
After three hours, Trixie gave up on sleeping next to Ponyville’s petite potentate. She rolled out of bed, silently cursing the pain in her hooves.
It was alright, she supposed, she had to get up and pee anyway. That was one part of pregnancy she did not enjoy…
…Not that there had been any parts of it she had enjoyed thus far.
After visiting the lavatory, Trixie could hear Twilight’s snores rumbling throughout the quiet house, and had no inclination to return. She checked the doors of each room, finally finding the stallion’s bedroom.
“Big Mac?” she whispered in the dark.
“Mmph?” the stallion grunted back.
“Trixie cannot sleep next to the princess, her snoring is too loud.”
“Tha’ whad id is?” Big Mac mumbled.
“Yes,” Trixie whispered as she approached his bed. “Can Trixie bunk with you, just for tonight?”
She was met with silence for some time, until Big Mac lifted his covers for her to get in.
“Trixie will leave before Granny Smith wakes, she promises!”
As Trixie crawled into the bed, the sleepy stallion pulled her instinctively to his chest. She felt warm, and safe… perhaps not everything about this pregnancy would be so terrible.