Lyra was leaning against her doorway, front legs crossed and cigarette hanging from her mouth. She'd adapted to standing only on her hind legs pretty well, though she was still a little wobbly. She took a deep drag and took the cigarette in her hoof, ashing it off the porch, letting out a large puff of smoke. She'd been able to do a lot more at one time now that she had her front hooves freed. "I gotta say, this was a pretty good move. Whoever knew that I would be so quick to learn new talents?" She grinned wide. "I think I should've had a cutie mark about having talents!" She chuckled then stopped, tapping at her chin. "What the hay would that look like?" She took another drag at her cigarette.
On top of gathering various hobbies and skills, Lyra had been researching and studying the layout and security of the royal Canterlot gardens. She hadn't forgotten her plan to free Discord, oh no. She had been putting to work her brilliant unicorn mind towards releasing the ever powerful god of chaos. Calculating, formulating, mapping and planning... And when that failed she would talk to her old friend Twilight Sparkle in the library, sitting around eating her chips while the lavender pony would answer her strange questions regarding the security force around the castle. Ultimately, her expert plan boiled down to visiting the castle in a tour and finding her way to Discord, arguing with whatever she saw... BRILLIANT! Lyra the bipedal pony, would also soon be known as a tactical GENIUS!
"Lyra sweetie, you coming inside for lunch?" Bon Bon called out.
"How about we skip lunch and I just come inside!?" Lyra laughed and let out some blue fireworks from her horn.
"Oh Lyra! I don't know what's gotten into you as of late, but I think I like it! We can eat later, come here Sweetcake!" Bon Bon walked over to the door, staring Lyra down with bedroom eyes.
"You bet your sweet ass Bobo!" Lyra put out her cigarette and walked over, forcing Bon Bon to the floor, mashing their lips tight together, forcing her tongue past her lover's lips. She felt the gesture returned with Bon Bon's tongue meeting her own. "Mmmmhmmmm Bobo that's nice!" The unicorn laughed as she felt lust well up inside her.
"Oh I know what you like Lyly, now get back down here!" Bon Bon pulled Lyra back down, kissing her deeply and stroking her lover's mane.
Lyra continued their kiss, only looking up for a moment. "Oh, shit!" Lyra pulled away from their kiss and looked rather panicked. Bon Bon had a look of disappointment across her face. "I'm so sorry Bon Bon, I have to go. The next train to Canterlot leaves in ten minutes! I was gonna go meet up with some friends and tour the gardens today. I'm so so so so so sorry Bobo." She gathered up a small pouch of bits and ran over to the door. "I shouldn't be gone too long baby. Hey you wanna come with?" She spoke quickly as if she was in a rush.
"Uh, no. I have some errands to take care of dear. Aren't you going to have lunch?" Bon Bon was a little confused and a lot disappointed. She was really looking for a good screw, she was even going to suck on Lyra's... She was going to do that one thing Lyra loved so much with her horn. All the energy and lust from mere seconds ago had left her.
"I'll take it to go love, in a hurry. You understand." Lyra stood up and took her sandwich in one hoof and ran out the door. "I love you Bobo, I'll see you later."
"I love you too... bye?" Bon Bon stared after her as she ran off. "Well... guess I'll go clop then."
Lyra ran, stuffing her sandwich in her mouth. It was a bit of a chore to chew the entire thing, and she almost choked trying to swallow it all down, but she managed. She made it to the train and gasped for air, leaning against a window. "Dammit, just when things were getting fun too. I'm sorry Bon Bon, but once I get back we'll break out that sexy saddle." Lyra giggled, then realized everypony else on board was staring at her after talking to herself and blushed. "Uh..." She gulped and stood straight, saluting for a reason even she didn't know. "Yes indeed, I was talking about having kinky saddle sex with my wife. Anypony who is uncomfortable with this information, please tune me out for the rest of this trip." Lyra felt her cheeks heat up with embarrassment. Some ponies just stared at her, mouth agape, she could hear one give a wolf whistle, almost every foal on board was having their ears muffled with their parent's hooves, and almost half the ponies stood up and walked out to the next car.
"What the hay is wrong with ponies like you?" One of the mother mares screamed out.
"I'm just being honest ma'am... I am truly sorry." Lyra gulped hard and sat down, bumping her front hooves against one another in embarrassment. "Note to self, being overly honest, does not seem like a worthwhile hobby."
"Yo! Lyra!" Lyra looked up to see who was calling her and saw a cherry colored pony who looked kind of wobbly waving towards her. "I had no idea you were into saddles, ya kinky fuck." The pony hiccuped and laughed.
"Heya Berry Punch!" Lyra waved back, happy to see her friend. "Saddles are more of Bon Bon's thing actually. How have you been?"
Berry Punch walked over and sat next to Lyra. "I been good hun. Pinchy's getting bigger every day, the sweet little thing. Gettin' quite the fuckin mouth on 'er though. NO idea where's she's pickin' that shit up." The earth pony let out another hiccup. "An' Romana been the same sexy bitch as always. Ah, I love those two ya know?"
"Romana?" Lyra hadn't heard that name before.
"Oh, sorry. I forget not everypony knows her by that name. Colgate?"
"OH! Awesome! How have you two been?" Lyra looked her friend over. It was obvious she was inebriated, but no more so than usual.
"She's back in my bed right now hun! Ain't it grand bein' young and in love?" Berry grinned and laughed. "I been thinkin' maybe she's 'the one' ya know? Kinda like you an' Bonnie. Ruby sure likes her, that's for sure. An' nothin's more important to me than my little Ruby Pinch's happiness... And a bitchin' bottle o' wine!" Berry laughed loutdly and hiccuped a few more times. "Say, when you and Bon gonna go drinkin' with us again?"
Lyra laughed. "You kidding? I'm still recovering from the last time."
"Aw that's a load o' shit an' you know it Lyra. You're the only pony who ever came close to drinkin' me under the table. C'mon." Another hiccup.
At the sound of this, another idea came to Lyra's mind. "Soon. And you can bet your flank I'll knock ya dead this time Berry. I'll be the best damn drinker in all of Equestria, even better than you!"
Berry Punch let out a laugh. "Ya ain't got the constitution hun. I like your spirit though. You could easily make second place." The pink pony stopped for a moment, staring at the wall before shaking her head. "What you headin' to Canterlot for anyway?"
"Touring the royal gardens. And you?" Lyra grinned.
"Well I guess so."
"Guess what?"
"Me too."
"You too what?"
"You just told me I was goin' to the gardens right?"
"No I was asking what you were doing in Canterlot."
Berry Punch gave a squinty, confused look back to Lyra. "Hun I don't even know half the things I do. I'm actually gonna get some fuckin' structure today and follow you."
"Probably a good idea." Lyra chuckled. While Berry was often drunk, she was in no way harmful. The earth pony had an astounding charisma and willpower, keeping her aware of what she did, so she was still able to function in everyday life. The two of them had known each other since elementary school, and even then Berry Punch had an unusual fixation with drinking whatever was around. The two were good friends, and Lyra was even Ruby Pinch's godmother. She remembered the first time she'd seen the little filly. Her dad was a unicorn Berry met at a bar. After an evening of 'unfulfilled expectations' as Berry once put it, she decided she was more of a mare's mare, a filly fooler. Though the sex wasn't fantastic, it had brought Berry the greatest happiness of her life, her daughter Ruby, AKA Pinchy.
Actually, Berry joining her would actually bring a fantastic opportunity. If what Twilight said was correct, than enough chaos should bring Discord to emerging again. What better way to bring about chaos than to have a drunk have her way with it?
Soon enough, the train made it's stop in the royal city of Canterlot and the duo found their way to the royal garden tour. Once they passed the sculpture garden, Lyra pulled Berry Punch aside and the two looked upon the statue of the mighty draconoquis. "Look at that Berry! A god, trapped in stone. Makes you wonder if all the other statues here are alive too eh?"
"What?" Berry Punch responded and not a moment later Lyra flinched at the sound of shattering stone. She turned around and saw Berry had walked backwards into one of the statues and caused it to shatter upon hitting the ground.
"Let's pray not." Lyra looked back to the statue of Discord. "So Berry... how do you feel about waking up a god?"
"Drunk."
"Besides that."
"Wasted."
"Forget I asked." Lyra groaned.
"What?"
"Exactly." The unicorn smiled with malice in her eyes. "The very embodiment of chaos and disorder, now a decoration in a hedge maze." She took in a breath of air to ready herself, then exhaled. "Berry, insult me real quick."
"You're a very beautiful pony and I'd fuck you if we were single." Berry Punch spoke without hesitation.
Lyra felt her cheeks turn red. "That's not an insult...Thank you...? But seriously Berry, come on, I can take it. Give me your worst."
Berry gave a stern angry look to the unicorn and hiccuped. "You bitch! You are one fucking amazing harpist. How dare you play so beautifully. And how Dare you.... you..." She began giggling in her inebriation. "You sit funny."
"Berry, you damn drunk. Is it really that hard to insult me? Come on!" Lyra crossed her front legs and tapped a hoof.
"How the hay should I know?" A hiccup, followed by a giggle. "Y'know you're makin' me wet with all yer fiesty talk. Wanna make out? Romana and Bonnie won't know. Promise!" Berry pursed her lips and made smacking noises as Lyra sighed and dropped her face in her palm.
"Are you really this drunk, or are you just messing with me?"
"Hay I dunno. I thought I was fuckin' with ya at first, but then I see the statue there turn into a goat... dragon... lion... thing... I think I'm hallucinating." Berry Punch grabbed at her head and let out a sigh.
"Wait... what?" Lyra turned around, her snout met the nose of Discord who was smiling back at her. "Well... looks like it worked..."
"But of course." Discord chuckled.