//------------------------------// // Like a Goodneighbor, Kingdomfarm is there // Story: Ponyville Public Access // by Justice3442 //------------------------------// Applejack sighs heavily as she surveys the damage of a spilled apple cart. One of its wheels is splintered and broken nearly in half which has caused the cart to tip to one side, and spill some of the mass of apples piled high inside. She frowns and lightly kicks one of the damaged red apples that has toppled to the rocky ground. She looks left, right, and even glances to the sky. “Like a good neighbor, Kingdomfarm is there~!” Applejack sings. A pony wearing a tricorn hat and red frock coat over a frilly blue formal jacket held closed by some sort of red, white, and blue sash. However, what Applejack notices most about the pony is that it looks like its face has been half-melted off before being blasted by extreme heat into some sort of tattered leather semblance of a normal face. “Hey,” the pony greets in a soft, if slightly scratchy masculine voice. “I’m your Kingdomfarm agent, or whatever.” He looks at the cart. “And you look like a pony who can use something to help with your troubled mind.” Although his appearance was plenty frightening, Applejack has had plenty of experience seeing ponies and creatures that look different and knows not to judge somepony by how they— “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—” The deformed pony sighs. “Alright, just get it out of your system.” “—AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—” “Come on! I don’t have all day! There are other ponies who’s gonna sing that damn song.” “—AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA—” The pony sneers angrily and places his face within a few inches of Applejack’s. “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!” Applejack fearfully clams up. Staring at the other pony she asks, “What in tarnation are you?!” The pony’s forehead pulls up as if it’s raising an eyebrow, its face missing such a feature. “You ain’t ever seen a ghoul before? I thought you ponies knew all about the wastes and stuff seeing as how many of you seem to be obsessed with it.” “Ghouls? Wastes? Ah have no idea whatcher talkin’ about! Where’s my regular guy?!” The ghoul glances at the cart. “You have a regular Goodneighbor agent? What? Do you make a habit out of breaking things?” Applejack sighs. “You clearly haven’t met my sister and her friends…” She stares at the ghoul, pulling her brow forward. “Ah thought ya’ll we’re named ‘Kingdomfarm’.” The ghoul chuckles to himself. “Let’s just say the whole place is operating a bit more ‘freely’ now.” Applejack taps her chin thoughtfully. “Gotta admit, something about Goodneighbor has a ring to it. Look, I’m sorry if Ah was rude, but Ah’m kinda in a hurry. Can you help me or not?” The ghoul pulls out what appears to be a large syringe with two cylinders flanking it. “Oh, I got yer fix right here.” Applejack stares intently at the syringe. “Now just what the hay am I supposed to do with that?” Without warning, the ghoul suddenly jams the syringe into Applejack’s arm and presses on the plunger. “Ouch! What the hey was thaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!” Applejack suddenly hitches the cart to her back and begins sprinting with the cart. She leaves a trail of fallen apples in her wake as the cart bounces up and down from the broken wheel. The ghoul grins and chuckles to himself. “Another satisfied customer.” A voiceover begins to speak as the words ‘Kingdomfarm are printed over the screen’. “Kingdomfarm. Of the ponies, for the ponies.” Twilight and Spike stare at the screen with matching blank stares as they try to process what they had just watched. “Twilight,” Spikes begin, “is it just me or are the things on the TV starting to make less and less sense?” Twilight opens her mouth to respond but a rainbow-colored streak suddenly flies by an open window, cutting her off as it begins to rapid fire a sentence. “HeyTwilightDoYouHaveAnyWorkForMeLikeMaybeSomeOverDueBooksICanFetchForTokensOrSomehing?!” Twilight turns just as the rainbow blur smashes crashes into the open window with a ‘thud!’  An inhaler with a small red bottle attached to it bounces away from Rainbow Dash and slides into the room, stopping at Spike's feet. “Rainbow Dash?” Twilight says in concern. AS Rainbow Dash hangs halfway in the window, she stares at Twilight with pupils as big as saucers and a smile to match. “WhyAreYouTalkingSoSlowTwilgiht?!HeyDoYouHaveAnyToolsOrFertilizerLyingAround?!Oooo!MaybeIShouldCheckWithAJIfShe’sNotTooBusyWithHerSettlement!” Spike picks up the inhaler and gives it a sniff. His eyes open wide as his pupils dilate. “Whoa! Who turned up all the colors?” Twilight sighs heavily. “Nope, I’m not dealing with this.” She begins to trot away. “Come on, Spike. We’re going to hide in the vault.” Spike begins to follow. “We have a vault? When did we get a vault?” The two walk out of the television room. “Since I got sick of dealing with everypony’s stupid problems.” “WaitTwili— GHA! Ugh…” Rainbow Dash rubs her head. “Who turned down the colors?” She attempts to get down from the window and succeeds by toppling face first onto the crystalline floor below. “Oof! Twilight! Come back! Do you have any Addictol I can buy off you?!” Rainbow Dash takes a few steps then trips over a rug in front of the TV. ‘Thud!’ “OW! I have caps!” she continues shouting after Twilight. “And like… 10 pipe pistols!” Behind Rainbow Dash, a gray pegasus mare begins a rapid descent to the same window Rainbow had just interred through. “Come baaaaaaack!” Rainbow Dash continues. “These come-downs are horrible!” ‘THUD!’ “Ugh… Tell me about it…”  The dizzy, wall-eyed pegasus utters as she hangs halfway in the open window.