//------------------------------//
// SCP-01110000011010010110111001101011-J — OH GOD IT'S HERE 
// Story: SCP-███ 
// by Journeyman 
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Item #: 01110000011010010110111001101011-J  

Object Class: KETER MOTHERFUCKER

Special Containment Procedures: We don't know where the fuck it is and we don't want to know. Should the subject ever be located, respond with locating Mobile Task Force Alpha-1 “KILL IT WITH FIRE” in order to contain the subject. If encountered by anybody short of a mobile task force, the subject is to be left the fuck alone. The subject’s last known location was in the middle of Ponyville before evading capture. 

Field agents are advised to run away screaming when coming into contact with the subject in order to broadcast their location. Urinating to make themselves look like a less appealing target is also advisable.

Description: The subject is a type of hairy mammalian creature that feeds off of friendship. All who come into contact with are are quickly enthralled and forced to love it. I swear it licked me once.



Dr. Lockheart has been placed in secure memetic containment pending further review.
~O5-██







You sick fuck.


Discovery: 


I was just walking back from my water polo match at the nursing home when I turn a corner to go get some donuts. I see it sitting there chewing on a hubcap and it looks at me, like, “I’ll rape your soul until you can’t have children.”


These are the last logs of Agent [REDACTED]. Agent was last seen being embraced by the subject and is presumed missing. We were too scared to look for him.





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