//------------------------------// // Secret Agent Mare // Story: The Bon Identity // by DashEight //------------------------------// 325 Stirrup St. Ponyville, Equestria 1001, Second Era of the Two Sisters 0230 Few things are more still than an empty building in the dead of night. Outside, nature is dynamic, always in motion. Wind blows through the trees, clouds drift across the sky, and the creatures of Luna's domain roam under the stars. The natural world rests for nopony, a chaotic bubbling mess of life and energy. The pony herds of old were very much attuned to this constant natural activity, huddling together en masse at night to provide protection and comfort from the strange, alien world around them. Eventually somepony figured out that it would be much easier to get some shut-eye if they didnt have to listen to all that damn racket the whole time. Who could sleep when everypony was constantly worried about owls, or bears, or owlbears? I mean, have you seen a manticore up close? No thanks. And would somebody shut those stupid crickets up already? It is three in the morning and we have to find a new field to graze in tomorrow and ugh... So ponies learned to control the weather, harness magic, and build structures to shelter themselves when they were at their most vunerable. Nature was great and all, but sometimes you just needed a break. Reshaping the environment was a small price to pay for a good night's sleep. Coincidentally, around this time coffee sales plummeted and did not recover until the invention of college. This course of events left ponies in control of their environment and masters of their destiny, but it had some quirks. Years of magical evolution honed pony senses to expect some level of background clutter at all times. Herding instincts kick in when a pony spends too much time alone. Their senses become hyper-aware, old fears bred into them for generations sink in. A small voice in the back of a pony's head starts urging them to seek friends and compions to better guard against predators. Empty homes often unnerved ponies with their stillness and silence, except for decrepit or haunted ones. Those were scary more for the restless spirits or poor resale value. The pony edging along the wall of a darkend hallway at two-thirty in the morning did not exactly appreciate this sentiment. To be fair, she was keyed up on a metric ton of adrenaline and a few Iron Bulls. As it was, she had other things on her mind. Like making sure she really was alone. You can do this, she thought. Two more rooms, grab the objective, and you're in the clear. She raised a hoof, shakily levelling her crossbow in front of her. Pause. Listen. Give your senses time to adapt. Don't rush, slow is smooth and smooth is fast. A minute went by. As her eyes and ears strained against the gloom, she could detect nothing out of the ordinary. No sound, no movement, nothing to suggest that this was anything except an average unlit living room. Okay, move. She pivoted through the doorframe, scanning the corners of the room and slowly, quietly advancing. She methodically checked every spot that could hide a hostile pony; you took no chances against an adversary as deadly as hers. Her crossbow's sights swept over the couch, unlit lamps, and coffee table, ready at a moments notice if any innocent furnishings revealed something sinister. She found nothing and resumed her careful advance, hugging the wall near the next doorframe as she positioned herself to sweep and clear the final room. The mare peeked around the corner and saw her objective illuminated by a beam of moonlight. The tall, angular box sat alone on a table, seemingly unguarded. She narrowed her eyes and waited, alert for the tiniest indication that she was not alone. Her infiltration had gone undetected so far, but she could not lose focus so close to her goal. No movements or noises jumped out at her. She hoofed a travel bottle of hairspray from her ninja-suit's saddlebag. A few aerosol spritzes later, a transluscent mist wafted through the doorway. It took on an almost etheral apperarance as it drifted through the shaft of pale light shining in through the window. The lone infiltrator screwed up her muzzle at the pungent chemical smell as she held back a sneeze. None came, and she noted the lack of laser tripwires between her and her prize. She carefully moved into the room and advanced to the target. She slung her crossbow and looked the innocuous box over, not daring to touch it yet. Hooves caressed the edge of the table, searching for any telltale wires or seams. Her ninja garb and inventive use of a Chill-Out spell would hide her from the thermal camera surely watching overhead, but this item's owner was far too shrewd to leave anything to chance. One wrong move now could spell disaster. One more hurdle and you're free and clear. Time to disable the alarm. Probably a pressure plate underneath or a motion sensor on the lid. Remember your training. She thought back to all those years ago, hoping her lessons would provide enough guidance to make it out of here alive. "Excellent performance, dear, but that last note was a C-flat. It should have been a G-sharp. Otherwise, much improved over last week." "Okay everypony, Miss Twinkleshine will start and the string and woodwind section will join her as they pick up the beat." "Your group project will be an original piece written in 4/4 time, based on the works of any musician from the Griffon Renissiance Era." "Ughh, chemistry is soooo boring. We shouldn't even have to take these Gen-Ed courses, we already have our Cutie Marks!! Pssst, Lemon Hearts! Ill buy your danish at Joe's this afternoon if you can fit your whole head inside this beaker!" ...so your training maybe isn't going to be useful here, she admitted to herself. Curse you, CGSU Department of the Arts!!! Why did you have to make your brochure so cool-looking?!? "You know, for a pony trying to sneak around, you sure are whispering to yourself a lot. It doesn't work with that whole stealth thing you've got going on." Right. Internal monolouges should be internal. Every muscle in her body tensed up in terror. She whirled around, looking for the source of the voice. She stared into the darkness, and the darkness stared back. Specifically, it stared back from about ten feet behind her, a shadow with three glowing orange eyes. THWAK! Her shot went wide, the shadow melting away. Hooves shaking, she racked another bolt into place. "Show yourself!" "Now why would I do that?" "Umm... to make it a fair fight?" "All's fair in love and espionage, bee-eff-eff," the perky voice floated somewhere off to her right. Her adversary moved like a ghost, quicker, quieter, and deadlier than she was. No hope for victory. Unless she could keep the shadow distracted... she put on her whiniest pout. "No it's not! You have nightvision goggles! That's, like, totally cheating. Why don't I get any nightvision?" "Good point, why didn't you get any?" "Because they're expensive!! You know I can't afford a pair on a musician's pay! You've got an unfair advantage!" "That's it? Like what you came here for isn't exp-" THWOK! Miss. The spectre melted back into the darkness. Time was running out, the being haunting her would soon tire of its game. A teal glow surrounded her horn as she began charging a Flashbulb spell. Her magic's aura and telltale warblewarblewarble sound made any further attempts at stealth useless, but the time for cowering in the dark was over. All she needed was one tiny chance, one lucky break to turn this whole game around. She chambered another shot and carefully sidestepped, flank to the wall as she scanned the room for a sinister shadow. Nothing. Frustrated, she whispered to herself, "c'mon, show me those bright shiny goggles one last time... where are yo-" Hot breath tickled her neck. She froze. "Look up." THWOK! Lyra Heartstrings stared crosseyed up at her new second "horn", affixed firmly to her head via suction cup. "I wonder if this is what goats feel like..." "Hon, I think goats have their horns on the sides of their heads," Bon-Bon remarked as she pulled another suction-cup dart off the wall. She dangled from the cieling, hind legs and tail wrapped around a chandelier. A pair of laquered wood and bronze goggles rested atop her head, holding her curly two-tone mane back. "Though, one more of those and you'd be the spitting image of a tricerapony," she giggled. "Speaking of goats, can you please lay off the Iron Bull? I know how you musicians like to party, but for Celestia's sake get some sleep." "Sure, mom." Lyra stuck her tongue out. Bon-Bon rolled her eyes. "Can we at least settle this silly bet? You tried, you failed, you have to make dinner this week," she glanced at the kitchen table at a plain box labeled 'EIO', absolutely devoid of any alarm systems. "And you have to get your own Expensive Imported Oats this time." Lyra let out an exaggerated sigh. "Fiiiiiiiiine," she glanced at Bon-Bon's goggles, the three orange lenses glinting in the light of the chandelier her friend hung from. "Sooo... sure you can't tell me about what you used to do with all these ninja moves and spy stuff?" "Lyra..." "I know, I know, classified, Princess's eyes only... I get it, Bonnie, I really do." Lyra paused, letting out a small sigh. "It's just... my best friend in the world has this whole other super cool side to her that I know nothing about. I can't help it sometimes." Bon-Bon frowned. She pulled the last of the darts from the wall. She leaned up and grabbed the chandelier with a forehoof, flipping herself rightside up as her tail let go. A moment later, she landed on the floor with the all the grace of an Anugyptian cat-princess. "I'm sorry Lyra. It's always a risk to tell anypony about my old life. I was burned because somepony got ahold of Ministry files and made them public. My identity and details of my latest missions were exposed to the world. Our whole department was compromised and shut down." Golden eyes took on a sympathetic look. "I-I'm sorry. It must've been hard, leaving everything you've known." "I do miss it, but..." Bon-Bon looked around the kitchen of her home/business then back at her best friend, struggling to remove a dart from her head at three AM. She smiled. "Retirement's kinda nice." Too preoccupied to notice the sentiment, Lyra gave up on removing the dart, instead levitating over several others and sticking them next to the first in a makeshift tiara. "All hail the Princess of Darts!" Bon-Bon couldn't help but laugh at that one. A thought occured to her as she paid respects to Equestria's newest ruler, giggling all the while. "Ly, a lot of my assignments were basically made public record by that stunt that got me burned. It's all under my birth name, and since nopony in this town knows who Sweetie Drops is, They have no idea that I'm the one in all those files. But since you're in on the secret..." She grinned. "It couldn't hurt to tell you what's already out there." Lyra's eyes were as big as dinner plates. Since the revelation at the wedding, this was the best. Thing. Ever. "Really?" Bon-Bon smiled at her friend, taking a seat at the table. She motioned for Lyra to sit next to her, which the unicorn promptly did in her usual odd fashion. "My name is Sweetie Drops and I used to be a spy. Until..."