“Good evening, Mares and Gentlecolts,” Sunshower says in an enthusiastic whisper from the table he is sitting at in the Wonderbolts’ cafeteria. He holds a cardboard tube like a microphone, and has one hoof to an ear as if listening to an ear piece. “This afternoon is the final round of the ‘Supreme Wonderdolt’ competition. And what a competition it’s been.”
“Indeed it has, Sunny,” a light blue mare beside him speaks up. She likewise holds a cardboard tube, and has her hoof against an ear. “Quite a competition indeed. Last round saw our very own Lead Commander Soarin and Clear Sky of Squad Six getting knocked out in the semi-finals.”
“And what a close elimination it was,” Sunny agrees, nodding to the mare. “I know you were rooting for Soarin, Fleet, but you have to admit he went down fighting.”
“That he did, Sunny, that he did,” Fleetfoot replies which a chuckle. “But, let’s turn our attention back to the final two competing today.” Turning, Fleet points over towards a large stallion wearing a cape and sunglasses staring intently at a card in his hooves.. “For those of you who have just tuned in, our first competitor is Air Mach, better known as Animak.”
“Yes, you heard right Mares and Gentlecolts, Animak!” Sunny picks up as Fleet turns to him. “Currently the effects specialist for Squad Seven, Animak is a favorite among the young foals for his boisterous attitude and showboating.” He then winks and nudges Fleet with one elbow. “I also hear he has a soft spot for a certain ‘Silver Streak’ in the ranks, if you know what I mean.”
Rolling her eyes, Fleet sighs. “Please, Sunny, he has absolutely no chance, and you know it!” She then smirks and puts a hoof on the table. “And speaking of no chance with the mares, our second contestant is the wanna-be playstallion of the Wonderbolts.”
“Indeed!” Sunny states seriously as he turns and points with his free hoof towards another table. “Ladies, still your beating hearts, and put away those pitchforks as our next contestant is none other than Lightning Streak!” The stallion in question is a pale blue with a two-toned light and dark yellow mane. He is likewise staring at a card in his hooves.
“These two stallions are competing for the honor of being named ‘Ultimate Wonderdolt’!” Fleet says happily, pulling a little trophy from under the table and putting it down in front of her. “A prestigious title, to be sure.
“Indeed, and for those at home who are wondering how they are going to attain this title?” Sunny asks Fleetfoot with a smirk.
“Well, Sunny, they simply have to be the last pony standing!” Fleet declares with a smile. “You are disqualified when you stop attempting to figure out the message on the card. So, whoever is looking at theirs last with the intent of figuring it out wins!”
“But, Mares and Stallions, this isn’t all fun and games! Yes, we have quite the amount of protesters lined up outside the finalists!” Sunny says somberly, looking over at Fleet.
“Yes we do, Sunny,” Fleet nods, but smiles. “But don’t you worry your pretty little flank! Our security team is second to none!” She turns, pointing with her cardboard tube. “In fact, why don’t we check in on them and see how they’re doing folks!”
Nearby, in fact really only a few tables away, the rest of squad Twelve and a few others seem to be running interference with a bunch of grumpy looking ponies.
The first set of ponies is an azure blue mare with a two-toned gold mane wrestling with another mare who looks like Spitfire’s double. The azure pony seems to have the upper hoof, and is slowly pushing the other back towards a table.
“You should know by now, Blaze,” the azure pony laughs as she pushes Blaze back more. “Mares are you true weakness! You’ll never beat another mare!”
“Shut up, Azure!” Blaze bites back as she springs forward to lock hooves with the other mare. “You and your squad of idiots are screwing around again, and I’m tired of it!”
“Why, Blazey!” Azure coos as she easily deflects an incoming punch and gets behind Blaze. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She then wraps her arms around Blaze and leans over to whisper in an ear. “Though, if you want to screw around, I’m sure Windy won’t mind.”
Blaze’s wings snap out, and she growls loudly, a blush on her cheeks. “Oh, that’s it!” She struggles heavily, which only accomplishes getting her off balance and allows Azure to easily toss her towards the table, and into a bowl of chili causing the entire thing to launch into the air and land on her head. “Why!? Why is it always chili!”
“Because,” Azure chuckles as she sits in front of the other Wonderbolt. “Anything else just wouldn’t match your fiery personality!”
“I see Azure has been paying attention to my fights with Blaze!” Fleet laughs as she looks back to Sunny, she then raises an eyebrow and pokes him with her cardboard tube. “You alright there, Sunny?”
“Hmm?” Sunny asks absently before looking back at Fleet, who nods to his fully extended wings. “Oh, horseapples….”
“It’s okay, Sunny,” Fleet giggles. “I like a little mare on mare action myself.” She wiggles her eyebrows before nodding to a different set of ponies. “But, Azure isn’t our only guard! Shall we look in to see how your friend Bear Claw is doing against the Captain of Squad Seven!”
“Yeah,” Sunny coughs as he clears his throat and folds his wings. “Lets.”
Pointing his own cardboard tube towards a second pair of ponies, Sunny and Fleet listen into the conversation they’re having.
“Look, I just have to know, Dex,” Bear Claw, the larger of the two, asks the smaller pony. “How does Rivet do the thing?”
“I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Dex, a tan pegasus with a curly orange mane and tail, sighs. “As I have not understood the past seventy-nine times you’ve asked me this hour!”
“But, you must know what the thing is!” Bear Claw continues, gesturing with his hooves. “I mean, the thing with the gizmos, and contraptions, and the blinky lights!”
“You mean inventing?” Dex asks slowly, raising an eyebrow behind his glasses. “Because if that’s not the case, then I assure you I have no idea.”
“Yes! That’s the thing!” Bear Claw declares, throwing his hooves up in the air. “Please, tell me how he does the thing! I must know!”
“Well, then please allow me to enlighten you,” Dex starts, pushing his glasses further up his muzzle as he takes on a serious expression.
“And I think that’s enough checking in with them,” Sunny says slowly. “If we keep on with them, the audience is going to fall asleep.”
“I think you’re right, I can barely stay awake when sitting in on meetings with Rivet!” Fleet yawns before shaking her head.
“You actually stay awake? You’re a stronger pony then I, Fleet,” Sunny chuckles. “But, then there are more ponies helping us out with security that just my squad! In fact, I think one of Lightning’s squad is aiding us in making sure he gets his fair chance at the title of Wonderdolt!”
“That’s right, Squad Three’s very own Misty Fly is keeping her Captain busy so he can’t drag his brother away!” Fleet smirks as she turns to look at the final group of ponies nearby, namely Misty Fly and another pony.
The two are in a silent conversation, Misty Fly’s wings and hooves moving as she speaks to the other pony in sign language, the other occasionally replies, but for all purposes is blind to the world at large around him, as his eyes never stray from Misty Fly.
“You know, the way Fire Streak looks at Misty, you can almost think he has something for her,” Sunny comments, raising an eyebrow as he smiles.
“I think even a blind pony could see there, Sunny,” Fleet replies, rolling her eyes. “Of course, with Lightning having absolutely no chance with the mares, all the smooth lines and luck with the mares had to go somewhere.”
“Too true!” Sunny nods sagely. “And I should know, I’m an expert in mares.”
“Your sister doesn’t count, Sunny,” Fleet smirks.
“Says you,” Sunny wiggles his eyebrows. “But, enough about that! I think we’re about to see the end of the championship! Lightning seems to be wavering!”
Turning back to the two stallions who are unknowingly competing in the competition, Fleet and Sunny watch as Lightning Streak’s brow starts to furrow and he narrows his eyes. He starts flipping the card over slower, sweat forming on his brow, tail flicking behind him. On the other hoof, Air Mach has yet to stop flipping his card over, his eyes hidden behind his glasses.
Before too long, Lightning sighs and tosses his card aside as he crosses his arms. “That thing lied, it didn’t tell me how to pick up mares!”
“And we have a winner!” Fleet declares into her cardboard tube.
“Indeed we do, Fleet! Let’s go to our head judge who shall give our lucky stallion his trophy!” Sunny delcares, looking over at Animak as a white mare with a gold-blond poofy-curly mane trots up to him with the Wonderdolt trophy.
“Animak!” The mare says loudly, putting an arm around the stallion’s shoulders. “Congratulations on winning the first ever Wonderdolt competition! Do you have any words for our viewers at home?”
Looking up at the mare, Air Mach smiles widely, pushing his sunglasses further up his muzzle as he jumps up and strikes a pose. “Well, Surprise! I would like to take this chance to tell all of them that no matter what, if you believe in your inner stallion, anything can be done!” He then looks to Surprise, who is simply smiling. “Now, what did I win?”
“Well, my boisterous friend,” Surprise laughs, “You’ve won the title of ‘Wonderdolt’ along with this nice trophy!”
Picking up the trophy and holding it up on one hoof as he poses, Air Mach laughs loudly. “Ah! More proof that I am the ultimate stallion! This proves the card right!”
Shaking her head, Surprise chuckles and turns, looking at thin air. “Well, Mares and Stallions, that’s all we have for tonight! Tune in next week to see who is the Alpha Mare!” She then reaches up and gestures as if she is pulling a light cord, complete with an audible click, and the lights go out…
“COMMANDER SURPRISE,” Spitfire yells from a nearby table. “TURN THE LIGHTS BACK ON THIS INSTANT!”
“Make me!” Surprise giggles, followed by the sound of running hooves before the doors to the mess hall open and Squad Twelve, plus Surprise and Fleet, scamper out laughing their heads off.