//------------------------------// // Humans // Story: Brony in Equestria: The Tacoing // by Omega Dracomancer //------------------------------// It has been a full month since the last time that I was injured, and in that month, I have mastered the skill of walking upright and flying upside down. My instincts were now at a higher level, that of a pegasus. I have also been training my magic with Twilight, and made an odd discovery. "Yo Twilight, check this out." I said, levitating a book over to her. "What is it?" she asked. "Humans!" I said happily. "What?" she asked, starting to read the book. "It says that humans have been here before." I explained. "Wow." "The same thing happened to them that happened to me, they turned into a pony." "Why haven't I read this before?" "Maybe someone is looking out for me." I said. "Did you read this part?" she asked. "Maybe, what does it say?" I asked. "That human turned pony was turned back into a human by getting struck by lightning." "That may be useful later, but I like using my wings and magic too much." "Says here that he kept both his magic and his wings when he turned back." she said, turning to me. "Where'd you go?" I wasn't anywhere near her, I was on my way to see Dash. "Human with wings and magic. Almost too good to be true." I said, smiling. I saw Pinkie and asked her where Dash was. Turns out she was in Cloudsdale working on the weather. "Perfect." I said, flying away. Just then I heard some yelling. "What's with the yelling?" I asked myself. I looked down and saw something that I never thought that I would see, another human, two in fact. I flew down and examined them closely. One boy, one girl. The boy was probably a jerk judging by the clothes he wore and the air that he carried around him. The girl looked unhappy with the boy and looked down. The boy was yelling at somepony. "Fluttershy." I said, enraged. I dived at him and tackled him to the ground. "Get the fuck off of me!" He yelled. Yup, definitely a jerk. I got off of him and looked back at Fluttershy. She had tears in her eyes and a look of shock on her face. That just enraged me even more. "Did you make Fluttershy cry?" I asked with incredible anger in my voice. "That that stupid pony's name? Yeah, what of it, bitch?" he said. "Nopony makes Fluttershy cry." I said, walking towards him. While I walked, a ring of lightning formed around me. I didn't notice it, and kept walking forward. The girl ran in between us and held out her arms. "Stop!" she yelled. I did, and she said, "I'm sorry about how he acted, he can't help it." I could tell that this was a lie, but I calmed down anyway. "Get out of my way bitch!" he said, moving to her. He pushed her out of the way and she fell down. "No mercy." I said angrily. The lightning returned, and I ran for him. I punched his face, and he was thrown back to a building. I ran to him and punched him again. This threw him through the wall and knocked him out. "I hope to Celestia that he isn't dead." I said coldly. "Is he ok?" asked the girl. "I hope so, I don't kill, I don't want to be a murderer. That aside, are you ok?" "Yeah, I'm fine." she said, "Why did you get so angry when you saw him?" "Nopony makes Fluttershy cry. I never wanted to see her sad, and I have. I never want it to happen again, but if it does, they will have to answer to me. Or someone else within the general area." I said. "Why are you so different from the other ponies, you walk like me, like a human." "I came here a human, and now I am a pony." "You're a human?" she asked, surprised. "Yeah." I said. "Prove it." "There is no way that I can do that now." I said, "You should know that." "I can think of at least one way." she said. "No you can't." I said jokingly. "What?" "Never mind, what is it?" "Knowledge of the human world." "Better idea, I just remembered something." I said, "Stay here, I'll be back in a minute." Then I zoomed back to Twilight. I got there and started looking around. "What are you looking for?" asked Twilight. "Ipod, you seen it?" "Over here." she said, using her magic to get it. "Thanks Twilight." I said running out the door. I jumped in the air and turned myself around, flying upside down. "Back to what's her face." I said. When I arrived, the boy was awake, and the girl was next to him, "He already got his due punishment, no shit beaten out of. Maybe." I said to myself. "Get away from me!" he yelled, backing off. I shot him an angry glare, and walked to the girl, "Check this out." I said, showing her my iPod. "That works." she said, "Guess you are a human. What's your name?" "I'm Phil, you?" "Destiny." "Who's the bastard that made Fluttershy cry?" "Name's Ray." he said. "Alright Ray, you need to know, if that happens again, to anypony, I won't be as nice as I was before." Ray just gave me an evil look. I glared back, and a spark of electricity appeared. "That reminds me, I gotta go!" I said. "Where are you off to?" asked Destiny. "Gotta see a friend, see ya. Ray, remember what I said, or you'll end up in the hospital much more than I had to." I warned. Then I flew off to go see Rainbow. "Hey Phil, whatcha doing?" she asked when I got there. "I need you to do something for me." I said. "What do you need?" "Zap me with some lightning." I said. "Are you crazy?" "You know the answer to that better than at least one pony." "Why?" "I'll explain later, can you do it?" "Yeah, hang on a sec." she said, flying away. After a few minutes, she reappeared with a black cloud. "Ready?" "No! Do it anyway!" I yelled. I stared straight at her, she lifted her legs, then everything went black. "Man, I get hurt too often here." I said, waking up. "You ok, Phil?" "Yeah, did it work?" I asked. "I don't know, but now you're a human again, so probably." "Sweet!" I yelled while I examined myself. Human me. I even had some pants and a t-shirt on "Fully clothed too, I was a bit worried about that." "Why?" she asked. "Human stuff." "Ok..." she said. "The only reason that I did this is because I would have wings and magic." I said, reaching back, "Soft." "Really?" she asked in amazement. "Wings." Then I smiled. "Best day in my entire life, so far." I flapped my wings, I could fly. "Thanks Dash, see ya." I said. Then I ran off the edge of the cloud and dived off. It was so much fun to dive again that I almost forgot to spread my wings. I nearly hit the ground, but used my magic to stop myself. I ended up landing right next to Destiny and Ray. "Who the hell are you?" asked Ray. "It's Phil, back to human form." I said. "How the fuck did that happen?" he asked. "Shut up." I said. "I've been meaning to ask you, how did you get here?" "No idea." said Destiny. "Any idea on how to get back?" I asked. "Only this piece of paper I found in my pocket when we got here." said Destiny, reaching into her pocket. I grabbed the paper, and it was indeed instructions on how to go back to Earth. "You two wanna go back?" I asked. "Hell yeah, I hate this world and all of the ponies in it." said Ray. "Who are you talking to, Phil?" asked Rainbow. "Destiny and Ray." I said, "They're new." "Cool." "Were you following me?" I asked. "What's with the lesbian pony?" asked Ray. Rainbow blushed and looked away, a tear in her eye. "Beat down time." I said with an angry glare in my eyes. After Ray was out cold, I asked Destiny if she also wanted to leave. "Yes, I miss my family, can you help us out?" "Yeah, stand still." I said. I focused all of my magical powers into the spell that I learned from the piece of paper, and after a minute, cast the spell. "See ya!" I said as they were teleported away. "Thanks for that." said Rainbow. "My pleasure." I said. She smiled and flew off. "Look at all this damage I caused beating the shit out of Ray. I'm gonna have to fix this somehow." I said to myself. There was a building missing a wall at the end of the street, and there were black scorch marks all over the ground. "Or maybe if I take off, I won't be blamed." Then I did just that, took off. I didn't make it very far, because my stomach started rumbling. "Fix the problem equals free meal?" I asked myself, flying back. When I got back, I started using my magic to fix the building. The pieces flew back to their original position and I sealed them together. I then used my magic to fix the ground up. When I was finished, it looked like there was no trace of a battle. "I did pretty good here." I said. "Thanks for fixing our house." said a pony. "That you, Lyra?" I asked. "Yeah, how did you know?" "I'm Phil." "Phil? Why are you a human, weren't you a pony a few minutes ago?" "Magic." She thought about that, opened her mouth to say something, then closed it, then said, "I don't think that I can argue with that." I remembered something that I forgot. "Listen, I gotta go tie up some loose ends, see ya." Then I flew off. "Do any of my friends need help?" I asked myself. "Actually, no, it doesn't seem so." I landed, then reached back. "Still soft. Hold up a minute, Fluttershy's wings might be even softer." Then I flew to Fluttershy's cottage. When I got there, I knocked on the door, and Fluttershy opened it. "Uh, hi Phil" she said. "Hi Fluttershy, got a weird question, can I use your wing for a second?" "Huh?" "Can I use you wing for a bit?" I repeated. "Um... Ok, I guess." she said, moving her wing to me. I reached my hand to it and said, "Soft, so soft." It was even softer than Rainbow's or my wing. "Thanks Fluttershy!" I said, walking away. "That was it?" "Yup. Wait a minute, Where is Canterlot?" "It is over in that direction, next to the mountain." she said, pointing. "If anybody asks, I'll be there." "Why are you going to Canterlot?" "I wanna see how soft the princess's wings are." I said, flying away. "Be careful!" she called after me. "Anything for the cutest pony around!" I called back. "Uh..." she said, blushing. "See ya!" I said, flying to Canterlot.