Turing Test stared back at the griffon before her as she and her friends all stood in the meeting room at Vanderbull Industries. He’d called himself “Talon Turing,” and he took a deep breath and just stared at her, a beaming smile on his avian face as he brushed his black crest feathers to the side. He still held her hoof in his claw, raising and lowering it gently, as if testing its weight.Turing Test cocked her head slightly at this, drawing her hoof back and giving a gentle twitch of her ears as she did so, but this only caused Talon Turing to gasp and clutch a claw to his chest.
“Remarkable,” he breathed. “I never imagined…”
Gadget rushed forward, eagerly taking up Talon Turing’s claw in her own mechanical hand and shaking it vigorously, startling him.
“Professor Turing!” she cried. “It’s such an honor! I’m Gadget, the one who wrote to you! I’m so happy you came to meet us! I’m Gadget— aaand I just said that already.” She groaned, dropping Dr. Turing’s claw as she smacked her own forehead with her hoof, her cheeks reddening slightly. “What I mean is, well, I’m really intrigued by your work on computing machines and I am soooo glad you read my letter and that you were available when Twilight and Turing were coming to visit - Turing Test Turing, I mean, not you, Dr. Talon Turing Turing. …Not that Turing. Other Turing.”
Vanderbull cleared his throat loudly and Gadget snapped to attention, finally stopping her prattling. The young mare pushed her glasses up along her muzzle and held her head up.
“So, um, yes. Thank you for coming, sir,” she managed to say.
Talon Turing blinked for a moment, then began laughing, covering his mouth as he did so. The onlookers all relaxed as he gave her a smile.
“Dear me, Miss G-Gadget, you flatter me too much! I’m not some pop idol or anything special. I’m just a simple scientist, a bit of a, well, t-t-tinkerer, you could say.”
Twilight noticed the slight stammer in the griffon’s speech, noting to herself that it was reminiscent of the way Gadget spoke when she became flustered as well. She was starting to wonder if it was a common thing in their profession or maybe they were just birds of a feather (fitting, considering Talon Turing’s species).
Twilight stepped forward, smiling politely as Dr. Turing faced her once again. “So, I guess Gadget asked you to come here and meet Turing Test?” she asked.
“Indeed so.” He raised a feathery eyebrow. “Was my visit unexpected? I haven’t imposed, have I?”
Twilight shook her head. “No. Well, that is, you are unexpected, but you’re not unwelcome at all! I’m very happy to meet you too. After all, in part thanks to Gadget, I named Turing Test after your theory!”
“Well, it’s less of a ‘theory’ and more of an idea, really,” he said, stroking his chin as he glanced over at Turing Test. “Still, I must admit that I am flattered to be the inspiration for your automaton’s name.”
“Robot.”
Talon Turing raised his head slightly, staring at her in confusion.
“I prefer to be identified as a ‘robot.’”
“You… ‘prefer’ it?” He smiled, nodding. “How interesting! Very well then.” He then turned his attention back to Twilight. “Princess Twilight, I, ah, I was wondering if you would grant me a private audience with Turing Test. There is a kind of, ah, a k-kind of experiment I would like to conduct, but before doing anything, I would like to interview her, one on one, to investigate Gadget’s claims. May I have your permission?”
Twilight pursed her lips. “Well, I guess that sounds fine with me, if you just want to talk. But that’s up to Turing Test.” She turned to her robotic companion. “How about it, Turing? Would you be all right with answering some questions?”
Turing Test nodded. “I will comply. It could be highly informative to speak with my namesake.”
“Splendid!” Talon Turing clapped his claws together, rubbing them eagerly. “Well then, Mr. Vanderbull, everypony, could we please have the room?”
They all nodded and started to leave.
“Twilight Sparkle, you will not stay?” Turing asked, causing Twilight to halt and look over her shoulder.
“Oh, well, I guess I could, but Talon Turing did say--”
“Ah, I say,” Talon Turing said, puffing his wings out as he stepped forward, “but perhaps we could simplify this ‘two Turings’ business. Your Highness, you could simply refer to me as ‘Talon’ or ‘Dr. Turing’ or, oh I don’t know, simply ‘Prof’ would suffice. I am used to it, after all. And while we are together, we could refer to Turing Test as just that, or ‘Miss Turing.’”
“‘Lady Turing’ would also be acceptable,” Turing Test said, raising a hoof.
Twilight rolled her eyes. “You didn’t get Rainbow Dash to call you that, so I don’t think we’ll start calling you that now either, Turing Test.”
Turing Test lowered her head. “Acknowledged.”
“In any case, I’m afraid I must ask if we could be alone. I wish for Miss Turing to answer my questions without the benefit of any cues from her caretaker or friends, if that is all right.”
Twilight again looked to Turing Test.
“That is acceptable. I will be glad to oblige.”
That said, Twilight and the others filed out of the room, leaving the two Turings behind. When the door shut behind them, they gathered up in the hallway.
“So, what exactly is it that makes Dr. Turing so important?” Twilight asked, looking to Gadget and Vanderbull.
Gadget and Vanderbull exchanged looks, both raising an eyebrow before they turned back to Twilight.
“Jeez, Twilight,” Gadget said, chuckling, “you mean you don’t even know that much?”
“Hey!” Twilight snapped, giving her a scowl.
“Er, what Gadget means,” Vanderbull said, interjecting (and giving his assistant a reproachful glare), “is that since you named Turing Test after him, or at least his ‘test,’ we assumed you had done more research into his work.”
Twilight looked away, her cheeks reddening. “Er, well, no… not really. I just know he wrote some stuff about robots or thinking machines or something.”
“He did,” Gadget said, “but he’s done a lot more.”
“Like what?”
“Well, his theories on computations have gotten a lot of ponies interested in building more sophisticated computers, especially after his paper on the Entscheidungsproblem--”
“On the what?!”
Vanderbull crossed his arms, rolling his eyes. “I never understand this theoretical mumbo jumbo.”
“It’s not mumbo jumbo, sir, it’s important!” she cried, her mechanical arms flailing about. “It’s… well, it’s all about whether you can solve any logical problem and prove something is true or not with enough axioms. This mathematician named Hill Bird wondered if, with enough time and resources, any problem with a ‘Yes’ or ‘No’ solution could be found. Dr. Turing imagined an automated computer called a ‘Turing Machine’ that would work through the data and try to solve problems.”
“What kind of problems?” Twilight asked.
“Oh, any kind!” Gadget exclaimed, balancing on the edge of her hooves, an increasingly crazed smile on her face. “I mean, it could be as simple as ‘For every X, if X is a pony, then X is not a griffon.’”
“Uhh, but that’s true, isn’t it?”
“Yes, yes, but the point is how can you prove it? And that’s just an example anyway--” She stopped, shaking her head. “Look, the point is, Dr. Turing did a lot of stuff with numbers and imagined this machine that would work through a lot of stuff that no pony could ever do on their own. He figured out two things: first of all, it’s impossible to prove that even with enough axioms, you could solve every single problem. But, more importantly - at least to me - is that he proved that if a problem really can be solved then it’s possible to construct a machine that can solve it.”
Twilight blinked. “Sooo?”
“It means that if a problem has a solution, no matter how complicated it is, then we can find the solution, and computers can answer that for us! And now a bunch of ponies all across Equestria are trying to build computers that can solve some longstanding problems!”
Twilight’s eyes widened. “So, wait, you mean we could make a machine that could solve Starswirl the Bearded’s 3rd Conjecture on the Universality of Polythaumaturgic Nets?”
Gadget blinked. “What?”
Vanderbull chuckled. “Now you know how I feel when you start talking like that, Gadget.”
Gadget frowned, ignoring the comment. “Er, well the answer is, if a solution to it exists, then a computer could calculate it, theoretically. I hear Dr. Turing is working on building a computer like that, too. It’s just too bad the Equestrian government isn’t subsidizing--” Gadget stopped, covering her mouth with her hoof.
Twilight cringed. “Oh. I guess Princess Celestia hasn’t really done that much to support it.”
“Which is weird, really,” Gadget said, using a mechanical hand to scratch behind one of her ears, “since it’s rumored that Dr. Turing used to work for the government.”
Twilight raised her head. “Wait, he did?”
Gadget shrugged. “Well, that’s the rumor. Nopony really knows.”
Twilight mulled this over and glanced at the door, which was still closed. She could barely hear the voices of the two occupants inside as they spoke.
***
Dr. Turing gestured to the nearby chairs around the coffee table in the small meeting room. Turing Test took a seat as the door to the room closed and Dr. Turing took up the seat across from her, rising into the air with some quick flaps of his wings before coming to rest in the large-backed, cushioned chair.
“Now then, shall we begin?”
Turing Test nodded. “I am ready.”
Dr. Turing adjusted his jacket, fidgeting with his wings slightly. “Well then… first let me make sure I have a few facts straight. Miss Gadget’s letters were a little, ah… disorganized, to say the least.” He cleared his throat. “Well, Miss Turing, am I to understand that you still have no idea who built you?”
“Some of the ponies who participated in my creation have been identified. One, designated ‘Fine Print,’ was discovered to be monitoring Twilight Sparkle and me in Ponyville. Another, Blue Blazer, was working at the Manehattan Hall of Science and unsuccessfully attempted to persuade Gadget to join her cause. They are both part of a much larger organization whose purpose for building me and methods for doing so remain unknown.”
Dr. Turing nodded. “I see. I must admit, while they seem like a group of scoundrels, I must compliment them on their achievement.” He smiled. “You, Miss Turing, are an amazing piece of technology. Gadget has sent me reports of your abilities. She says that Princess Twilight has tested both your physical and many mental abilities, in particular your mathematical prowess. Is that true?”
“Affirmative.”
“Then let’s try something a bit more complex than simple multiplication and division.” Dr. Turing took a notepad and a pen from his shirt pocket and began writing, narrowing his eyes in concentration. He gave what he had written an approving nod.
“I have a small equation here. When I show it to you, I want you to calculate the smallest possible value for ‘x+y+z’ in the shortest time possible, assuming x, y, and z are non-zero positive integers. Do you understand?”
“Yes.”
He leaned forward, holding up the paper. On it was the following:
3x = 4y = 7z
“61.”
Dr. Turing dropped the notepad, his eyes bulging. He had barely raised the notepad and was still leaning forward when Turing Test had answered it. She’d answered in less than a second.
“That is c-c-correct,” he managed to say. “My word, Gadget wasn’t exaggerating when she said you were quick.” He chuckled to himself. “That wasn’t a terribly difficult problem, but your speed is remarkable!”
“Thank you.”
He laughed. “‘Thank you,’ ahaha… oh just marvelous!”
Turing Test tilted her head, which prompted Dr. Turing’s laughter to intensify.
“So quick, so lifelike! Oh my… we have electronic calculators that can match your speed, but even they require our input, and such machines are the size of rooms! How is it that you can match their computing power and so much more and remain mobile?”
“I do not know,” she replied. “While I know many of my capabilities and that I am able to develop new ones, I have no data available on how I am able to function. However, my central processing unit, analogous to the organic brain, is split into three functions. My basic functions control my physical movement and interpret data and input. My lower cognitive function passively absorbs and interprets data and runs numerous subroutines based on the information I learn that influence my behavior. My higher cognitive function is responsible for decisions, abstraction, and interaction. The three work in concert with the data stored in my databank, which is essentially my memory. How I am able to do this is still unknown.”
Dr. Turing was nodding the whole time, taking notes on the notepad. “Remarkable. Well then, would you mind if I pick your brain for a bit?”
Turing Test sat bolt upright, her hooves clutching her head. “I must insist that you not attempt disassembly or picking of any kind on me, regardless of your offer of one bit.”
The griffon held up his claws defensively. “No, no, I only meant that I wanted to ask you some questions for a little while!”
Turing slowly lowered her hooves. “My apologies. I still find idiomatic expressions difficult to interpret.”
Dr. Turing nodded. “I see. Well then, I’d like to know more about your friends. You’ve been making friends just as Twilight Sparkle asked you to, correct?”
Turing Test nodded.
“And you claim to have experienced emotions, as well?”
“Correct. I have experienced numerous emotions such as gratitude, sadness, anger, amusement, and affection, among others.”
“So you would say that you have feelings of affection for your friends, then?”
“Yes. They accept me and teach me things that enhance the quality of my existence. For example, these gems on my forelegs,” she said, raising one of them to display it for Dr. Turing, “were a gift from my friend Rarity. I acquired them yesterday here in Manehattan.”
Rubbing his chin, Dr. Turing examined them more carefully. He smiled. “They’re lovely.”
“Thank you.”
“Why do you value them, though? Do they enhance some function?”
Turing paused and looked down at them, noticing the glow from her eyes reflecting off the precious stones. “They enhance my appearance. An ongoing difficulty I have had with making friends or being accepted among organics is my unconventional appearance. It is my hope that these will make me ‘pretty.’”
“‘Pretty?’ That matters to you?”
“Yes. Furthermore, it is normal to be appreciative of a gift from a friend, particularly one that requires significant effort or is acquired at significant expense.”
Dr. Turing frowned, looking up at her. “So you value them because they assist in your primary function of befriending others and because it is normal to be grateful for a gift?”
Turing Test nodded. “That is correct. However, your expression indicates you find fault in that.”
“No, I, ah, I sup-- I suppose that the way you’ve described it is similar to the way organics operate, though I’ve never heard it described so, ah, mathematically. You don’t dress it up.” He sat up, his eyes looking upward as he considered that. “Actually, now that I think about it, that’s actually quite refreshing. Hm.”
“Do you have other inquiries, Dr. Turing?”
He turned his head, as if he’d forgotten that she was there. “Oh, yes, of course. Ah, well, what of ethics? Do you have some sense or code of right and wrong?”
He noticed that Turing Test looked over at the door, the servos in her neck whirring as she glanced at it.
“Twilight Sparkle attempted to give me codes for behavior, a series of three ‘laws,’ but they proved to be inadequate. I am currently operating with no codified parameters that dictate my behavior.”
“But are you able to tell what is right from what is wrong?”
Turing’s ears squeaked as she shifted them up and down on their hinges. “I am able to understand that some things are considered so.”
“Well, what if, for example, I were to make you angry or offend you in some way? Would you then strike me to silence me?”
“No,” she replied immediately. “Physical violence is not an appropriate response in that situation.”
“‘In that situation?’ Then, is it ever acceptable?”
Turing did not move. “I am unable to answer that.”
Talon Turing narrowed his eyes. “Miss Turing… have you personally ever been physically violent?”
Turing Test lowered her ears, casting her gaze downward. “I do not wish to answer that question.”
Dr. Turing took a deep breath. “All right,” he said quietly. “I… um… I am sorry. I meant no offense.”
“Understood.” She lifted her head. “Please proceed with your inquiries.”
“Well, let’s leave off such things. You say you have trouble with idioms, so perhaps I could test your language ability. Would that be all right?”
“Affirmative. You may proceed.”
Dr. Turing cracked his taloned fingers. “I’d like you to consider the following phrase: ‘Time flies like an arrow; and fruit flies like a banana.’” He grinned. “Do you understand the meaning?”
Turing Test tilted her head, her eyes contracting slightly as her ears twitched. “The meaning is… is…” She tapped her chin, metallically. “The phrase is difficult to understand.”
Dr. Turing frowned and heaved a sigh. “I see. Well, if it is too difficult to answer--”
“I wish to answer,” she said, interjecting so suddenly that he gave a start. “I have analyzed that time is an abstract concept that is not capable of traditional flight, and neither are bananas or fruit of any kind capable of flight. I do not believe that the meaning is nonsensical, however.”
He leaned forward. “Go on,” he whispered, fixing his eyes on her. “Try.”
“Scanning memory… I have identified the phrase ‘time flies’ in different variations in numerous texts. Each case corresponds to the perception of time as moving faster or slower than expected, a concept that seems to be unique to inherent weaknesses of organic perception.”
Dr. Turing raised an eyebrow.
“It would seem that the word ‘fly’ in this case is equivalent to this concept of the passage of time. Since arrows travel quickly, this indicates the opinion that time generally passes more quickly than expected or desired. However, that does not explain the second half of the phrase…” Her eyes contracted even further, and a high-pitched whine began to emanate from her.
“It’s quite all right, really, Miss Turing,” Dr. Turing said, holding up a claw.
“But I do not wish to disappoint Twilight Sparkle. If I am unable to answer your questions, she will be unhappy.”
“No, no, it’s all right,” he assured her, getting up from his chair and taking her by the shoulders. “Y-you’ve already performed admirably in understanding the first half of the phrase. I daresay no other machine could understand that much. Some organics might not either, for that matter, so please do not strain yourself.”
The whine began to fade and eventually dissipated completely. “Very well, Dr. Turing. However, I request that you do not tell me the meaning of this idiom. I will attempt to decipher it later.”
He nodded, smiling at her as he stepped back. “It seems that such problems give you a lot of trouble. I shudder to think of how you might fare against a logical paradox.”
Turing Test stared back at him. “I am unfamiliar with that concept.”
“Oh, you know,” he said rolling his hand mildly. “It’s a sort of contradictory statement, like, say, if I were to declare ‘This sentence is false!’”
Turing Test’s head drooped to one side and her eyes shrank to pinpricks. The high-pitched whine was heard again and she stiffly dropped to the side of the chair.
“Oh! Oh my, oh dear, what have I done?!” He flew at the door, yanking it open, spotting the others still waiting outside in the hallway. “Princess Twilight, everypony, come quickly!”
They all dashed inside and found Turing in her frozen state.
“Turing? Turing!” Twilight shouted. “Oh my gosh, what happened?”
“I d-d-d-don’t know, I only gave her an example of a logical p-paradox and she became like this!” Dr. Turing said.
Vanderbull turned to Gadget. “Gadget, suggestions?” he demanded.
“Uhhh…” She scrunched her eyes shut, only to have them pop back open again as she raised one of her mechanical fingers. “Oh, I know! Try turning her off and back on again!”
Twilight whipped her head to look at her. “What? Why would that work?!”
“I don’t hear any other ideas, let’s try it!” Gadget jumped onto the chair and opened the compartment on Turing Test’s back, pressing the large red button and holding it until the robot powered down, her eyes going dim and her body going slack.
They all waited with bated breath as Gadget pressed the button again. Turing’s eyes blinked back on and gradually she began to move and sat back up.
“An unexpected shutdown has occurred. Checking for memory errors… minor errors detected and repaired.” She glanced around and saw the concerned faces of the others. “Twilight Sparkle? What has happened?”
They all breathed a sigh of relief as Dr. Turing came over. “I’m t-terribly sorry Miss Turing. I didn’t know you’d react so terribly to what I said. Do you remember anything of our conversation?”
She nodded. “Affirmative. You and I were discussing various aspects of my existence and ‘picking my brain’ about various information, including my comprehension of idioms. You then made a statement which caused me to go into an infinite loop. For protection, the statement has been deleted from my memory. I will attempt to construct a protective subroutine to cancel such loops.”
“Oh!” Twilight exclaimed. “You mean like that time I asked you to divide something by zero?”
Turing Test turned toward her and leaned in close. “Please do not say things like that, Twilight Sparkle. Even if they no longer cause my systems to freeze, I still do not like them.” Despite Turing’s lack of expressive facial features, Twilight couldn’t help but feel like she was being glared at.
Twilight winced, giving an uncomfortable smile. “Sorry. Dr. Turing and I will be more careful.”
“Yes, of course,” Dr. Turing said, adjusting his tie. “I am terribly sorry, Miss Turing Test. But, I rather think that I’ve learned what I needed to. I would now like to propose a bit more.”
Twilight narrowed her eyes, staring at Dr. Turing. “What do you mean? If it’s going to put Turing Test in danger…”
“No, no, nothing of the sort.” He sat up and puffed up his chest. “You’ve named your robot friend after my proposed ‘Turing Test.’ But do you know what that test actually involves?”
Gadget nodded eagerly, but Twilight only shrugged. “I’m sorry, but I don’t,” Twilight replied. “Gadget told me that it’s some sort of test to see if a machine is intelligent or not, right?”
“That is correct,” he said, “and Miss Gadget, if you would, I’d like you to not reveal the proposed version of the test outlined in my paper. Princess Twilight, if you’re amenable, I’d like to offer Miss Turing Test the chance to take, well, the Turing Test.”
The stunned silence in the room was broken by Gadget’s snickering.
“So, Talon Turing wants Turing Test to take the Turing Test? I wonder what will happen when Turing Test tests Turing’s Turing test.”
They all stared at her blankly, save for Vanderbull, who groaned and put his palm to his face.
“W-well, I thought it was funny,” she mumbled, turning away.
“As I was saying,” Dr. Turing continued, “in my short interview with Turing Test I see a lot of evidence that she might, in fact, be an intelligent being. However, this was only a preliminary measure. In the interest of being more thorough and scientific, I’d like to take things a step further.”
Twilight glanced back at Turing Test, then back to Dr. Turing. “With all due respect, sir, I’m confident that Turing is intelligent. I don’t really see the point.”
“Excuse me, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said, hopping off her seat, her metal hooves clattering on the hard floor, “but I would like to ask Dr. Turing more about this test.”
Twilight raised an eyebrow, but nodded. “Okay, Turing. If you want to.”
“Thank you. Dr. Turing, while I am happy to have Twilight Sparkle’s approval, many doubt that I am intelligent or sentient or capable of thoughts or emotions. You also appear to be unconvinced. If I were to pass your test, would that prove that I am intelligent?”
Dr. Turing furrowed his brow. “Well, it wouldn’t necessarily, ah, definitively prove anything. But it might give us far greater insight into your inner workings and help me to test my own hypothesis. I admit, there may be nothing to gain, but if you perform well, it could very well strengthen your argument that you are, in fact, a thinking being.”
“That’s right, Turing!” Gadget said, coming to her side. “With empirical evidence and something solid on your side, we just might be able get everypony to see you in a new light!”
Turing was quiet for a moment as she glanced to each one of them, coming to Twilight last of all and lingering her gaze on her. Then, at last, she turned back to Dr. Turing.
“With Twilight Sparkle’s permission, I would like to participate. When and where will it be held?”
Talon Turing clapped his hands together. “Oh, I’m so happy you’ve agreed! Well, I’m afraid that the test would be in Trottingham. My colleagues and I have a laboratory set up near King Bullion’s College at Cambridle University. We could be ready relatively quickly at your convenience. I daresay, if you’ll come back to Trottingham with me this afternoon, we could begin the test tomorrow.”
Twilight tapped her chin. “Well, I was going to go back to Ponyville today, but I guess I didn’t have any major plans for at least a few days.” She looked at Turing Test again and broke into a smile. “This is really important to you, isn’t it, Turing?”
She nodded. “I believe this to be a significant opportunity to prove myself publicly.”
Twilight placed a hoof to her chest. “Then I’ll guess I’ll have to send a telegram to Spike and my friends in Ponyville to let them know we’ll be delayed and then we’ll be glad to join you in Trottingham, Dr. Turing,” she said.
“Yes, yes, of course!” he exclaimed, bowing to her. “Oh, and since you were responsible for this introduction, Miss Gadget,” he said, turning to the bespectacled young mare, “I’d like to extend the invitation to witness the test to you as well.”
Gadget gasped, but froze and bit her lip. “O-oh, well, that would be wonderful, Dr. Turing, but I… I mean, I’ve got work to do here and I just took some time off and I’m sure Mr. Vanderbull needs me to--”
There was a hand on her shoulder and she turned to see Vanderbull crouching and looking at her, a warm smile on his face. “Go with them, Gadget,” he said.
“S-sir? I mean… no, that’s too kind of you,” she said, waving her hooves (and her mechanical arms) in objection. “I mean, we just had a security breach and I know you’ll need help with--”
“Gadget, I am going to spend the next few days tightening up our security and questioning various employees about whom I have doubts. But since you are one of those whom I certainly can trust, I see no reason for you to linger here.” He stood back to his full height, crossing his arms behind his back. “Go with them. Take notes. Learn as much as you can and return here freshly inspired. That is an order, Gadget.”
Swallowing a lump in her throat, Gadget held her composure and clicked her hooves together, saluting with one mechanical hand. “Yes sir!”
“Then it seems our little party has been settled,” Dr. Turing said. “Let us gather our things and I will meet you all at the train station. We’ll take the 4:15 to Trottingham. Now, if you’ll excuse me,” he added, stretching his wings as he moved for the door, “I have been told of some wonderful things to see and do here in Manehattan and I should like to experience them before we leave. I’ve heard much about the Manehattan take on pizza, for instance…”
***
Twilight rolled over in her bed, tossing off the sheets as she sat up, feeling herself jostled by the gentle rumblings of the train. She looked down and saw Turing Test sitting by the window, looking out at the countryside as it passed. The robot glanced up at her, noticing her movement. Gently, Twilight peeked over the side of her bunk and to the lower bunk, where Gadget was lying in her own bed, limbs akimbo and mouth hanging open.
“I guess Gadget isn’t having any trouble sleeping,” Twilight whispered.
“That is correct,” Turing replied quietly. “She has shown no response to the movement of the train and has not been disturbed by any ambient sounds.”
“I’m not surprised,” Twilight said with a yawn. She rubbed her eyes gently. “She didn’t sleep very well at all last night. I’m glad to see she’s resting now. Sure wish I could do the same!”
Turing tilted her head. “You also received less sleep than usual last night, Twilight Sparkle. Why are you unable to rest?”
“I guess I never sleep too well on trains for one thing,” she said, gingerly climbing down the ladder, careful not to make too much noise and risk waking up Gadget. “And for another, I guess I’ve just got a lot on my mind. I’m going to the dining car. If they’re still open, maybe I can get some water, or maybe some herbal tea.”
“Would you like me to accompany you?”
Twilight smiled, but shook her head. “That’s all right, Turing. I’d like a little time to myself, if you don’t mind.”
“I do not. Please enjoy your tea, if it is available.” That said, she turned back to the window.
Twilight was about to leave when she paused and looked back at the mechanical mare. “Say, Turing Test...?”
“As you wish: Turing Test.”
“No, I mean--”
“That was a joke. Ha ha.”
Twilight rolled her eyes, but chuckled nonetheless. “Cute. But seriously, there’s something I wanted to ask you.”
“What is it, Twilight Sparkle?” she asked, turning around to give Twilight her full attention.
“Well, I guess I still don’t understand why you’re doing this. I mean, I’m curious about what Dr. Turing has planned as well, but this could… I mean…” She trailed off, causing Turing Test to step closer.
“You are concerned. I do not understand the reason. If I am able to pass this test, it may well prove that I am intelligent and have a place among organics.”
Twilight swallowed. “Yes. If you pass, that might be the case.”
Turing continued to stare at Twilight, even as she fidgeted, looking away slightly. After a moment, it clicked.
“I understand. You are concerned about what will happen if I do not pass.”
“Well, why wouldn’t I be? If the benefit of passing is that you’re accepted as intelligent, then failing the test could mean that nopony will take you seriously again!” Twilight’s pupils constricted as she stared off into space. “What if Dr. Turing publishes a report? What if Celestia reads it? Oh gosh, what if all of Equestria reads it?!”
Turing Test watched her as she began to hyperventilate. She’d heard it said that Twilight was prone to stress regarding tests; it seemed those rumors were true.
“Twilight Sparkle, do you believe that I am intelligent?”
Twilight paused and turned to face her. “Of course I do!”
“Then there is no need for concern. I will pass.”
“But--”
“I will prove myself.” That said, she turned back to the window. “You should get your tea and relax.”
Twilight looked away, a frown on her face. “Turing, I’m sorry, I… I didn’t mean anything by it. I’m just worried about you. That’s all.”
Turing Test said nothing, but continue to stare out the window. At last, Twilight heaved a sigh and walked out the door, shutting it behind her.
She walked down the center aisle of the train, feeling it shift and rumble under her hooves. The trip to Trottingham from Manehattan had proved even longer than she’d suspected. Dr. Turing had sent word to King’s College and quarters had been set up for them, but it would still be after midnight until they arrived. It was for that reason that Gadget and Twilight had both tried to get some sleep that evening.
Twilight yawned again as she walked into the dining car. A single unicorn stallion wearing a black vest and bow tie was behind the counter of the spacious dining car cabin. The rest of the tables placed around it were unoccupied… or so she thought, until she saw a familiar griffon sitting alone in the corner, writing notes on his notepad.
“Dr. Turing!” Twilight exclaimed.
He looked up from the notepad and smiled. “Princess Twilight! I thought you’d g-gone to bed!”
“I thought you had too,” she said, returning his smile. “I guess neither one of us felt like napping.”
“Yes, quite.” He stood and pulled out a chair for her. She bowed graciously and took a seat. “Would you like cup of chamomile tea? Our host has a kettle on for me.”
“I’d love some, thank you,” she replied. “That’s just what I was looking for.”
“Wonderful!” He looked over to the stallion behind the counter. “Another c-cup for Her Highness, please?”
The stallion bowed and a moment later the tea kettle began to whistle. He levitated it and poured two cups of tea on saucers and levitated them both deftly over to Twilight and Dr. Turing without spilling a drop.
“Sugar?” the stallion asked, levitating some sugar cubes.
“I’ll take two,” Twilight said.
“And three for me,” Dr. Turing said. “My m-mother always said I had a sweet beak.”
Twilight chuckled as the sugar cubes floated over and dropped gently into their tea.
“So then, Princess Twilight,” Dr. Turing began. “What is it that has kept you up tonight?”
“You can just call me Twilight,” she said. “I still don’t really like all the official titles unless I’m doing something… um… ‘Princessy.’”
Dr. Turing laughed. “Ah, how charming! Very well, Twilight. So, as to my question?”
Twilight took a sip of her tea. “I’m worried about Turing Test. Er, about Miss Turing taking the Turing Test.”
“Ah. I see. You worry that her failure could be the cause of, ah, unforeseen c-consequences.”
She lowered her head. “Yes. I’m worried.”
“I sup-suppose that you could withdraw her from the test, if you wish.”
“I would, but Turing Test wants to try. If I don’t let her, I think it would hurt her feelings. In fact, I think I already hurt her feelings by telling her I was worried that she wouldn’t pass.”
Dr. Turing smiled. “How extraordinary,” he whispered, taking a sip of his own tea.
“Huh? What do you mean?”
He swallowed, setting the cup back on the table as he steepled his clawed fingers and leaned forward on the small table. “She values your opinion and has the capacity to be offended, or at least to act like she is. She certainly seems intelligent to me.”
“Then,” Twilight swallowed, leaning forward, “why don’t you just say that she is intelligent?”
Dr. Turing frowned and leaned back.
“We don’t need to take this test, Dr. Turing, you can just say she’s intelligent and everypony will believe--”
“T-Twilight, please…”
“You’re the expert! If you can just say that, then it’ll be enough, and she won’t need to worry!”
He folded his arms, closing his eyes. “That won’t work, and even if it did, I w-wouldn’t do it.”
Twilight leaned closer. “Dr. Turing, please!”
The griffon opened his eyes and saw the telltale glimmer of tears forming in Twilight’s eyes.
“Prin-- Twilight, you must understand,” he said, uncrossing his arms, “that my opinion is just that. A more rigorous test would be needed, or else it would m-merely be the word of a single griffon with nothing more to back it up than intuition. I can’t believe that would satisfy the whole of Equestria, the scientific community, or even Miss T-T-Turing herself! Or you!”
Twilight opened her mouth to reply, but then shut it and lowered her head. “No. I guess it wouldn’t.” She took a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I’m… I’m just worried.”
He smiled. “I understand. Listen, there are many things she does that make me think she could do well on the test and, again, I see signs that she might be intelligent.”
Twilight mulled that over and took another sip of tea. “What do you mean ‘might be?’”
“Well, she displays the ability to learn and reason and certainly claims to have emotions and seems to have a sense of herself, all of which indicate intelligence. But she is also obtuse in many ways and the way she describes her reasons for her actions is all very, well, ‘by the numbers,’ so to speak. She said she was grateful for the brooches on her forelegs because they served a purpose and because, as she said, it was normal to be grateful for a gift.” He sighed.
“Well, it is, though,” Twilight replied. “What’s wrong with that?”
“Come now, Twilight. W-when someone does something nice, are you happy because some rule states you ought to be happy?”
“What?” She made a face at that. “Of course not! I’m happy because, well, it’s nice to be thought of, or… I mean… I don’t really need a reason to be happy, do I?”
“Perhaps not. But Turing Test seems to think otherwise. I am curious if she is genuinely having those emotions or if she is displaying them in an effort to seem more like real ponies.”
Twilight narrowed her eyes. “You think that’s what she’s doing?”
“I don’t, I d-don’t,” he drew himself up, trying to steady himself. “I don’t think anything at this point. I can only wonder about it. I’ve just m-met her today, and th-th-that’s not enough to conclude anything! I know that her d-directive is to make friends, so it may well be that she has taken steps to appear to be an emotional, thinking being, but it may all be a very convincing illusion, brought on by sophisticated programming and algorithms more complex than even I could fathom!”
Twilight looked away for a moment, but then, to Dr. Turing’s surprise, she smiled. “No. Turing Test has a mind of her own. She has emotions and she is intelligent. I don’t have any doubts.”
Dr. Turing smiled back. “To be honest, Twilight, I am of the same opinion. I simply would like some data to back up any formal assertions. You know,” he said, holding up his teacup, “that when I was small, I had a book my mother gave me. Natural Wonders Every Foal Should Know, it was called. It described the workings of the body as those of the functions of a machine. In so many ways, I began to think of our own physiology in those terms. If that’s the case, if we too are machines of a sort, then I think we have quite a lot in common with Miss Turing, and she with us.”
Twilight nodded. “I guess that’s true, in a way.” She relaxed, sitting back as she took a sip of tea. “I’m sorry for getting emotional.”
“It’s q-quite all right,” Dr. Turing replied. “You worry for your friend. I certainly know the value of companionship. I imagine Miss Turing does as well.”
“Mm hmm.” Twilight gulped down her cup, looking over at the host behind the counter. “This is good tea. Think I could get another cup?”
“Yes, Your Highness. There is still some left.” He poured her a cup and set it back on the table for her, the two lumps of sugar already in it.
Twilight stirred her tea and noticed that Dr. Turing was staring out the window, a distant look in his eyes.
“Dr. Turing? Are you all right?”
“Hm?” He turned back to her slowly. “What? Oh, yes. I suppose I was just thinking of… well, let’s just say this all reminds me of times gone by.”
Twilight raised an eyebrow. “In what way?”
“Well, I… ah, forgive me, I don’t wish to bother you with my troubles.”
Twilight put her hoof to her chest. “I’m the Princess of Friendship. Helping ponies - or griffons! - with their troubles is what I do!”
“Well, this is more of an older matter,” he said, smiling, “but if you insist.” He rubbed his chin, deciding how to start. “I once had a classmate back when I was a younger griffon. Barely more than a fledgling, honestly. He was a pegasus with a keen interest in mathematics, much like myself, and we were the best of friends. We spent almost all of our time together and he m-made those rather difficult days at school bearable, even enjoyable.”
Twilight smiled warmly. “He sounds nice.”
“He… he was nice,” Dr. Turing said, his voice becoming quieter. “His name was Mist Toucher. He was the most important one in my life and I had hopes that we would eventually study together in university, but…” He paused, swallowing a lump in his throat. “But he suddenly died just after graduation.”
Twilight gasped. “Oh. Oh no, Dr. Turing…”
“It-it-it was tuberculosis. Poor lad had it as a child. Never told me. Probably knew I’d worry about it.” He gave a wry laugh, placing a claw over his beak, staring back out the window.
Twilight placed her hoof over his other claw. “I’m so sorry. I can tell he must have been a very special friend.”
“Oh, he was more than just a friend.”
He waited as Twilight processed that. Her eyes widened momentarily. “Oh, I see. I didn’t realize you, were, um…”
“You’re not disturbed by that, are you?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.
She smiled and shook her head. “No, of course not. I just was surprised. I didn’t know.” She held out her hoof. “Please, continue.”
“Yes, well, after he passed away, I… I continued to feel as though Mist were watching over me. When I would go flying along our old routes between our boarding school and town, I… I-I-I felt as though he were flying with me, as we used to all those times before.”
Twilight looked out the window as well. “It’s funny you mention this. Just last night, Turing Test asked me if she had a soul.”
Dr. Turing turned toward her slightly. “Oh? And what did you say?”
She shrugged. “I said I didn’t know the answer and that she should make up her own mind.”
He smiled. “A good approach.” He turned back to the window. “Nowadays, I admit that I don’t hold much faith in the notion of the soul. But back then, I was obsessed. I wondered how the soul would connect to the body, what sort of mechanism bound us to our souls, and indeed, to our minds. I felt the need to, ah, to divine the solution to the question of, if Mist Toucher truly was still with me, then in what state did his mind still exist?
“From there, I began to contemplate the existence of minds in general, and wondered how else they might manifest. Could they only exist in organic matter, in the brain? Could they exist in some form of energy? In some other structure? Could we create an artificial mind? An electrical mind? And that’s what fascinated me with the notion of automated computers and, in turn, with the idea of thinking machines. That is what compelled me, eventually, to posit my ideas about machine intelligence. Perhaps somepony else had a similar idea and gave birth to what is now Miss Turing.”
Twilight was quiet as she stared out the window. The countryside was a sweeping blanket of darkness barely illuminated by the passing lights from the train cast out over the fields and plains. Overhead, the stars glimmered innumerably.
The two sat in silence as they watched the world pass by.
Dr. Turing finally broke the silence as he drank the last of his tea. “We’ll be in Trottingham soon, Twilight. Perhaps we should both get a little rest before we arrive.”
Twilight nodded, finishing her own tea. “Yes, you’re right. Thank you.”
Dr. Turing blushed slightly. “Um… I am sorry for the morose nature of our conversation. I’m sure it wasn’t what you wished to hear.”
She smiled and shook her head. “No, not at all. I know it sounds strange, but it actually makes me feel a little more calm. I’m still worried about Turing Test, but you made me feel a little better about this situation. And I admit that I feel a little better knowing more about you, Dr. Turing. To be honest, at first I wasn’t sure what sort of griffon you were, but now I really think you’ve got a good heart. That’s why I know Turing Test will be in good hoov-- claws.”
The two of them laughed. “I am relieved to hear that. Good night, Twilight Sparkle.”
“Good night, Talon.”
The two of them went their separate ways, and Twilight returned to the sleeper car, opening the door to her own room, and saw Turing Test still sitting at the window and Gadget still laid out in bed.
“You are back, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing Test whispered. “Did you enjoy your tea?”
Twilight nodded. She trotted over and put a foreleg over Turing’s shoulders.
“Twilight Sparkle?”
“I’m sorry about earlier, Turing Test,” she said, looking out the window with her. “I didn’t mean to doubt you. I was just afraid. But I’m going to stop worrying about it and just let you handle everything. Just do your best and I’m sure you can pass any test they throw at you.”
“I agree. Though I doubt any test they give will involve throwing.”
Twilight chuckled. “Good joke, Turing.”
“That was not a joke.”
Twilight facehooved loud enough that Gadget woke up with a start and fell out of bed.
“Huzzamuzza yessir Vister Mandible, sir…” she managed to mutter before falling back to sleep, facedown on the floor.
Twilight gave the sleeping girl a lopsided look, one eye twitching. “Well at least somepony can get a good night’s rest around here,” she grumbled.
***
When the train finally pulled into the station at Trottingham, it was after 1 o’clock in the morning. Twilight led the group, still rubbing her eyes, with Turing and Gadget in tow. Gadget was holding up their bags with her mechanical arms, while Turing carried the rest. Gadget in particular was still groggy, which is why she blindly walked forward until she bumped into Twilight, who had halted on the platform.
“Huh, whatgives Twi’ight?” she muttered, glancing up. She was awake in an instant.
A dozen members of the Royal Guard were all standing at attention. Additionally, a few purple-clad members of the Night Guard were among them.
Twilight frowned. “Huh? What’s going on?”
“Forgive us, Your Highness,” said the leader of the group as he stepped forward. “We’re just here to escort you to your destination. Given the recent activity of the conspirators you encountered, Her Majesty Princess Celestia asked that we see to your protection.”
Twilight sighed. “Fine. I suppose that should be all right.”
They turned when they heard the flapping of wings and some of the Guard tensed up. They all relaxed when they saw Talon Turing flying over.
“Good heavens!” he exclaimed. “Is everything all right?”
“They’re just here to take us to Cambridle, Dr. Turing,” Twilight replied.
One of the Night Guards cleared his throat and came over. “Actually, Dr. Turing, we need to speak to you for a moment.”
Dr. Turing stiffened, as if standing at attention, and his expression was stony. “Very well.” He nodded to Twilight and the others. “Please go on ahead. I will be with you shortly.”
Twilight looked to the two Night Guards uncertainly, but did as she was asked. When the others had left, Dr. Turing leaned in closely.
“What is the meaning of this?” he hissed.
“Princess Celestia got your message, Dr. Turing,” said one.
“She felt it necessary to have this delivered in person,” said the other. He held an envelope in his hoof. The envelope had an ornate sun-shaped emblem on it.
“Ah. A Royal reply, as it were.” He nodded and took the envelope, gently tearing it open with his talon and drawing out the letter. He read it and slowly began to smile. “I see,” he said at last. “Very well. You may convey to Her Majesty that I will obey her orders to the letter.”
They both nodded and saluted. Before they left, however, the second of them said, “Oh, and by the way, Dr. Turing?”
“Hm, yes?” he asked.
“Equestria owes you its thanks. Even if they don’t know it.” He smiled. “But we in the Night Guard haven’t forgotten.”
He smiled. “That’s very kind of you. Perhaps someday others will know what we did. Some,” he said, looking down at the letter, “sooner than others.”
He read back over the line of the telegram that had most caught his eye:
“...hereby granted permission to discuss your work exclusively with H.R.H. Princess Twilight. As a Princess, she has the right to know what went on in those days…”
To be continued...