//------------------------------// // September Drabble - themunck // Story: Auto's Authentic Anecdotes // by Autocharth //------------------------------// Celestia tries to introduce her sister to the wonders of modern technology. Luna only has eyes for the toaster. In the halls of Canterlot, decked in the beauty of many centuries of dynasty, a dynasty found in the form of but two ponies, Princess Celestia felt a headache forming alongside a very firm desire to have everything not invented in the past two decades thrown out. Along with the toaster. “Wondrous,” gasped Princess Luna, wide eyes peering into the abyss of wire and cherry-red grid within its majestic square frame. “Truly, this is a creation for all the ages to appreciate.” Biting back a sigh, Princess Celestia nodded. “Yes, toasters are very impressive,” she agreed. “Of course, they are just one application of such technology. Another device invented not longer after based on the same principles was-” “A larger toaster?” “What? No- I mean, yes, there are such things, but that isn’t what I meant,” said Celestia, brow furrowing. Her eyes widened, and her horn glowed, gently tugging her sister’s mane aside before it could fall into the toaster as the nocturnal alicorn pushed the toaster’s lever down once more. “Please, Luna, there is more to the modern era than the wonders of toasters.” Her lips pressed into a thin frown, watching her words go in one ear and out the other, bypassing not merely her brain but also anything else her sister might happen to have in that starry skull of hers. ‘Now, let’s not be like that,’ she told herself, shaking her head. ‘Luna has every right to be amazed by the things our little ponies have created.’ “Ah!” The floor shook with the impact, and for a moment Celestia hoped the shock of toast bouncing from her forehead would dull her sister’s enthusiasm. She waited with baited breath, watching for… “Amazing!” Luna rose, hooves clapping together in excitement. “Sister, did you see? Is it not fantastical beyond what the greatest of sages of the past may have imagined?” Sighing the sigh of the long-suffering, Celestia nodded. “Yes, Luna, I saw it. Perhaps, while you enjoy your toast, you would be interested in learning about the marvelous invention we call ‘trains’, and the rail system they use.” It wasn’t phrased as a question. It wasn’t worded as a question. For all intents and purposes, it was not a question. “No, thank you. I wish to delve the depths of this buttery, delicious mystery,” answered Luna, as if anything like a question. ‘I never twitched like this when she was on the moon,’ Celestia thought. Forcing a smile onto her lips, Celestia reached over ever so gently and began to pull the toaster away. “Luna, I must insist, there is far more than a mere toaster-” “Mere?!” The hiss burst from Luna, and she bared her teeth in a snarl. Her glee disappeared, and she snatched the toaster back. “You dare insult this ingenuous creation as a ‘mere’ toaster? Celestia, for shame! To think you would be so blind to the brilliance of our subjects, crafting such a device that defies imagination!” There was that twitch again, and it took every iota of willpower for Celestia not to snap at her questionably sane sister. ‘Perhaps the Elements of Harmony weren’t quite as...thorough as I thought.’ “Luna, my dear, beloved little sister. I want you to know, I mean this with the most love and care in all the world…” She leaned in close, staring her sister straight in the eyes. “It. Is just. A toaster!” For a moment, all was quite, Luna stared back, her expression empty. In that silence, Celestia hoped with all the hope she had, that Luna had listened- Well, she hoped that right up until Luna tackled her. “For toaster!”