//------------------------------// // Rule 48 // Story: Chronicles of an Evil Overlord // by Melancholy //------------------------------// Domination of Equestria - T+189 days. Manehattan - Offices of The Evil Overlord - Sub-basement 83 - Vault 23 - Entry Level:Black Well, this wasn’t exactly how I had planned to do it. I mean, ok, getting into a facility that your enemy has had years to fortify was never going to be easy, but meticulous planning has always been something I’ve prided myself on. Of course, I’m no Twilight Sparkle, but given her...absence… Moving on. Being chased by changelings through tunnels carved as far deep under the city as the skyscrapers are tall was not how I expected to be spending my time a year ago. No, I was planning to open my new Manehattan store, having learned my lessons from that brief disaster in Canterlot it was supposed to be a smooth grand opening, laying down some ground rules early on then popping back to Ponyville all in time for my Spa date with Fluttershy. I wonder how the poor dear is doing? Still. None of that happened. Instead madness spreads out of Manehattan faster than a swarm of parasprites followed swiftly by an army of changelings, ponies and fell spawn from Tartarus that sweep across Equestria faster than Sweetie Belle can burn fruit juice. And here I am, where it all started, in the dank basement of the ‘so called Overlord’ being chased by changelings. I may have mentioned that before. It was surprising to find that a penchant for fine magical control and design would be so well suited to guerrilla warfare. Why did it have to have such a vulgar name? Let’s see if we can’t do better shall we? Lone Mare Warfare? Tactical Withdrawal Mastery? Ba- Ok, less naming schemes more dodging changeling fire. Why am I telling you all this if I have more important things to do? Well I felt the need to record my story, just in case this all goes wrong. I know, I know, poor time to do it, but I kind of only just thought of it. Yes, back to how well things have been going till now. Turns out that a lot of devices have weak points, similar to a complex dress design. In the same way that a single thread can hold together an ensemble headdress for Sapphire Shores, a few bolts maintain the structural integrity of many designs of warehouse. I know right? How poorly has the Manehattan building code been enforced these last few years!? I wonder. Still, remove a few bolts, distract a fork lift driver at just the wrong time and...bang! The whole building comes down in less time than it takes Rainbow Dash to wake up from a midday nap. Which, granted is a fair amount of time, just not enough to stop the inevitable collapse of a few hundred tonnes of rubble, metal and roofing material. Occasionally, there’s a fire too. A pleasant bonus. Ah, it seems I’m here. If anyone is listening to this, it means...well it means this didn’t have the desired effect. Or maybe it did, along with some unexpected side effects. Like explosions. Rainbow may like explosions but I have to say...I’m not a fan. The Central Control Stalk. A lump of changeling biology grown into a machine with the sole purpose of taking forced control of the hive mind. All I have to do, is cut it… right… here… Tada! It withers away like a flower long past its prime, and thankfully, with a distinct lack of explosions! Now, all those hooves coming up behind me… “Hello darlings! I’m very pleased to announce that this horrid thing behind me is now no longer in operation! You should feel a lot more like your old selves again!” “Rarity Belle! Stand down and prepare to be taken into custody for crimes against the Overlord and the Dominion of Equestira!” “No no, don’t you see? His control is gone now, you don’t have to follow his orders any more!” “Err, Miss, you do realise that thing hasn’t been running for months right?” “Err, what?” “Yea, that thing hasn’t been controlling anyone for ages.” “Then might I ask why you follow that brute? My understanding is he killed and cut up your Queen?” “Oh yea, but she was a bitch.” “Yea, total hag.” “And the Overlord...isn’t?” “No way. We have a pension now.” “Yea, a pretty good one too.” “And integration into Equestrian society as a whole.” “Is that so?” “Yea, we have real rights now.” “He’s a pretty swell guy when you’re not destroying his stuff.” “Or ogling his wife.” “Dude, be real, you’d want to ram a massive spike down the urethra of a dude who was eyeing up your wife too.” “True.” “So, let me just get this clear...The changelings in the Overlord’s army aren’t being controlled, and are in fact, quite happy and do not need liberating?” “Oh gods no, where did you get that idea!?” “Yea, that’s crazy.” “I...See…” “So, you going to come quietly? We have orders to mess you up if you decide to resist in any way.” “No! No...that won’t be needed. I’ll come quietly.” Overlord Rule No:48 I will treat any beast which I control through magic or technology with respect and kindness. Thus if the control is ever broken, it will not immediately come after me for revenge.