//------------------------------// // Chapter 2: To Be Taught // Story: A Cog in the Machine // by ManlyDerp //------------------------------// Chapter 2, To be Taught “Oh you’ve got opper… opper… Ugh! Line?!” “Oh for the love of Luna’s pits, Flam! It’s, 'Well you’ve got opportunity in this very community!’ It rhymes, brother! It should be the easiest part of the slogan!” “Well excuuuuse me, Flim, but last I checked I was the idea pony and you were the showstallion! I think it’ll work just fine if you were the only one singing, brother of mine!” “Nonono! We’re the Flim Flam brothers, not Flim and gang! Brother, we need to do this together if we’re going to hit maximum profit margins!” “Oh… oh your right, brother! Let’s do this together, partner! 'Well you’ve got… opportunity in this very community! He’s Flim!” “He’s Flam!' Together now!” “We’re the world famous Flim Flam brothers! Traveling salesponies nonpareil~!” “You did it, Flam!” “Yeah…I did, didn’t I, Flim?” “No, we did it, brother!” And then they brohoofed, followed by brohugging. Gag me with a spoon. Actually, please do. You would need to get this fire proof muzzle off me first, but I would really appreciate it if you did. Also, while you're up, could you get me out of this goddamn doggie carrier? ... No? Well, I tried. Why would they need to have doggie carriers this large anyways? Also, what other creatures in Equestria breathes fire like a dragon?! This muzzle seemed to be readily available in the convenience store Flim and Flam stopped at after 'liberating' me from, bleh, Trixie. The one pony that was working at that store didn’t even look up from his damn magazine at the sound of a dragon begging to be let go three feet away from his face! It must have been a 'Playfilly'... ... Seriously, what the hell is wrong with Equestria? These were the things I pondered about while being freaking bored out of my mind. I had nothing better to do, after all... I've long since figured out how I'm going to escape. At this point I’m just biding my time... Quick mental checklist. Still in Equestria? Check. Still a baby dragon? Check. Still have razor sharp, eye gouging claws that can tear the carrier’s lock to shreds? Check. Tore the lock to shreds when the brothers weren't looking? Check and check. This muzzle must be enforced with magic material, or something, because my babies (thinking of naming them McStabbystab and Frank) can’t even scratch it! Even with my universe breaking ability of having opposable thumbs/claws in a land of hooves, I can’t seem to get this darn thing off me. Again, probably magic. I'm also still a girl and that’s totally the reason I’ve been crying my eyes out. Yup, totally the reason and not because I was horrifically betrayed and sold off to slavers by a pony who I considered a friend. Yup. Totally the reason. Double check. ... Trixie... -Sniff- Flam's voice cried out. “Phew! Let’s take five, Flim. My belly is a screaming for something to eat!” -Sob- ... h-haha, s-screaming, like what I was doing all of last night until they bought this muzzle thing for me... Funny. “Good idea, brother. Afterwards, let’s make some touch ups to the machine. We still need to get all the vacuums checked out, get the charms in place, and... oh, brother! I just had the most brilliant idea! Remember momma’s old fainting couch? What if we put that in the front and take it with us around Equestria?! I’m sure it would make us seem just as refined and cultured as momma and auntie Sham were!” “Excellent idea, Flim! We’ll go pick it up later tonight. For now though, let’s try to discuss possible names again. Does it need to rhyme with anything in the song?” “No, the slogan can take in about anything at this point and it’ll fit. I designed it with adlibbing in mind. How about we…” And then they disappeared into the garage, which apparently had a kitchen attached to it in the back. Weird. More importantly, that machine that was under the tarp yesterday? Yeah, it's their Super Speedy Cider majigger. They're still working on it though, so I guess they haven’t actually started traveling in it yet. Since Trixie has already made her visit to Ponyville, I guess that would put me somewhere in season one, maybe early two? That doesn’t seem like a whole lot of time to become 'World Famous'. Damn snake oil salesponies. Even more importantly though... they're gone. Time for me to make a dash for Trottingham. Somepony there has to be able to help me… ... I hope. Silently, I opened the doggie carrier and made a sprint for the dirt trail. I also made sure to pick up the remains of my egg, which was still left out in the open from yesterday, before I left. Trixie’s comment about it burning up a week after hatching makes me think that this might be my ticket out of here… somehow. Yeah, I’m grasping at straws here, but it’s better than nothin- It was at this point that I ran face first into a green forcefield. “MHE MHUCK?!” Still gagged, sadly. More importantly though... how the hell do they have a forcefield?! First of all, I didn’t even see it until just now! Secondly, how in the fresh hell do they have a forcefield?! I thought that was Shining Armor’s bit! Sure, Twilight can do it too, but she could also do Rarity’s gem finding spell. Twilight’s smart and magic is her talent, so it makes sense. Flim and Flam, on the other hoof, may be some definition of smart (as smart as enslaving a fire-breathing dragon can be anyways) but their talent isn’t magic! Its… ... Um… ... Apple-halves? ... W-well it sure as hell is not forcefields, so how…? My wandering eyes suddenly caught the sight of the smiling mug of Shining Armor, plastered to a cardboard box marked 'Easy Made Forcefields! Just add magic!' ... Faceclaw. These guys must be charm junkies. Also, Shining Armor is making a little extra money on the side, apparently... There’s a story in and of itself. Well, whatever. I’ve got another idea. Mr. McStabbystab? Frank? Let’s do this thing! I began spinning my arms around wildly, mimicking what I remember Spike doing for Rarity out in the gem fields in 'A Dog and Pony Show'. The soft dirt gave way to my claws’ constant assault, forming a baby dragon sized hole as I moved further into the Eart-, er, Equestrian terra firma. I folded my wings as tightly as I could as I jumped into my hole and continued digging under the forcefield. Yup, doesn’t go underground, just as I thought. The changelings must have exploited this flaw by using the underground diamond mines in Canterlot… or, at least their Queen did but not the soldiers. ... I’ll never figure out what the hell they were trying to do. At least it was cool to watch. Popping out on the other side, I made a mad dash away from the camp with egg in tow. ***^*** The one good thing about my time with Trixie… besides the feeling of safety, the full belly, the place to sleep, the full belly… ... -Sigh- ... Ugh, getting off track. The one good thing about my time with Trixie was that now I knew what general direction Trottingham was in. Just following this road will take me there quickly. This path is actually a branch off of a well trotted road, apparently. Me thinks the path I’m on was created from the pushing of the Super Speedy Cider thingamajig up and down it from wherever the hell the Flim Falm brothers are from. ... With my luck they’ll be from Trottingham and it’ll be the first place they look… One long walk/run later, I passed through the main gate of Trottingham without incident. I decided to stash the egg shards away in a nearby bush, so as not to lose them, before entering the town proper. Once I completed this chore, I took in the sights of the town for the second time in the last two days. Trottingham… is kind of a letdown. Think Ponyville but with more black and grey. The only other noticeable difference is that more ponies wear clothes here than in Ponyville, so I guess you could describe it as a mixture of Canterlot’s culture and a dash of Ponyville’s rustic feel. I liked it at the time, as it made me feel nostalgia for my hometown… but now looking around, I quickly came to realize that everything here was now capable of conjuring up memories of my short time with Trixie. Like, for example, over there is the restaurant where we stopped for dinner. During said dinner, we shared an order of hayfries and chatted a bit about Trixie's so called 'slaying' of an Ursa Major. Hehe, sounds familiar, doesn't it? Looks like the incident in Ponyville didn't humble her at all. Trixie also claimed that said incident was the result of her simply having an 'off' day. Right... It was also here at this restaurant (which was called 'The Dainty Dish') where Trixie told me about how a dragon’s immune system was resistant to, well, everything. Sure if you abuse it with, say, ice cream, of course you’re still going to get sick. But beyond that? Dragon’s don’t have 'allergic' in their vocabulary. Hehe... I instantly ordered an extra-large milkshake after that. Yeah, a hayshake was an option too, but to hell with that! I was going for broke! Ha! ... I… I wonder if that was rude of me? O-of course I shared it with Trixie, it was her bits after all... ... But… maybe if I had ordered a small instead she wouldn’t have- I shook my head and sighed. No… thoughts like that aren’t going to help me here. Trixie had planned to get rid of me from the get go. I was just a… a cog in her master plan, simple as that. I need to stop thinking about her. … But I can’t help it when I look around. Over there is the bench that the two of us sat down on after we had gathered everything from the stores. Oh my gosh, you wouldn’t believe it, but Trixie sits just like Lyra! She sits like a human! When I asked her about it, she blushed and said it was just another habit left over from her carnie days. Apparently, she would often hang out with 'The Bipedal Pony' and she figures some of that guy's strange habits rubbed off on her. Ha. Taking another sweep of the area, I was able to spot the stall where Trixie filled her saddle bags with apples. It's run by Apple family ponies, and now that I think about it... if worse comes to worst I could try to escape to their farm which I assume is somewhere here in Trottingham. The Apple families are supposed to be very hospitable, right? Maybe they’ll take pity on a dragon like me if she ran away from her, ugh, masters. I bet they could always use an extra pair of claws on their farms... ... Their stall was empty today though. ... Strange. In fact, every stall seems to be closed. Yesterday this place was what I assume Ponyville’s marketplace would look like on a busy day. But today… nothing. Now that I think about it, I haven’t seen another pony since I entered Trottingham! ... I only saw ponies yesterday too, by the way; no griffons or mules or anything non-pony really. I guess Trottingham’s supposed history with discrimination could be the cause of this. Flim’s words come to mind. “Damn talkers…Talkers live only to serve ponies… It’s just another damn talker like the rest of them.” Talkers… I guess that’s a derogatory term for anything that talks but isn’t a pony. Thinking about it, every non-pony creature on the show would be frowning when seen in the background, with the exception of cows. The sheep Applejack rounded up and the sheep Spike rode during 'Dragon Quest'? Frowning. The oxen pulling heavy things in 'Hearts and Hooves Day'? Frowning. The dragons that were flying overhead during the great dragon migration? Their default expression was 'frowning', and I’m starting to think it’s not because of an animation quirk... But, I'm getting distracted again. I need to find somepony who can help me... ... Bleh. Saying 'somepony' is starting to leave a bad taste in my mouth... I moved on. Looking around a bit more, I spotted the library Trixie and I browsed through yesterday. Before we continued on with her shopping, Trixie wanted to stop by and see if this store's magic tomes collection had improved at all since her last visit to Trottingham. I was ecstatic during this visit. 'Finally! A chance to learn some things about this new world!' I thought. It wasn’t an awesome tree library but it would have to do, I guess. Being short on time, I decided to only look over what could be consider the most beneficial to me as a traveler. With that in mind, I looked over some maps, some older newspapers, and a magic tome. Location, current events (and date too), and the one thing that I'm sure anyone else in my scaly shoes would be curious about: magic. Firstly, the map was interesting, but not very helpful outside of seeing where Trottingham was in comparison to Ponyville and Canterlot. Its down south from both by a large amount of miles. Down… south. … I'm not even going to comment on that. The magic tome was also… interesting, I guess... but I honestly have no freaking clue what the hell was in it. It was made up of nothing but weird symbols and graphs. I assume it makes perfect sense to unicorns... or, at least I prayed that it made sense to them. If all books were like that then I was going to be in trouble... Thankfully though, the newspapers were written in a language I understood, and a quick glance at some normal books confirmed that this seemed to be the official language of Equestria. Phew, that was such a relief. The newspapers turned out to be much more useful to me in the long run, as it not only helped me learn what language they use here, but also the date: October 2012, the same month and year as I remember it being... also the same dating system as Earth. Strange... but, again, phew, that was another weight off my shoulders. Outside of those two points, however, I couldn't discern where I was in the timeline, which was the main reason I picked up the newspapers in the first place. Maybe I just didn't look at the right ones (I went through them rather slowly, under fear of tearing a hole in them with my new claws), but I just couldn't spot anything in particular that told me if I was in season one, two, or three. I did learn, however, that Prince Blueblood did something to somepony over something, making himself look like a jerk… again. Guess the thing at the gala wasn't his first time being a dumbas- ... wait, can I still use that word here, or do I have to use the word 'flank' instead? Hmmm... something to ponder about later, I suppose. Besides those three points of interest, however, the visit was uneventful... until Trixie scared the living crap out of me, that is. She unintentionally came up from behind me in order to inform me that we were leaving, and her sudden appearance caused me to gasp out a tongue of fire and accidentally light up the newspaper. Unluckily for us, it burned into a small, black, unrecognizable crisp right in front of the head librarian. What resulted was another appearance of the 'squeeing' soundbite, both from me and Trixie. … I don’t think I’m going to find any help in that library, now that I think about it. My mind returned to the present and I continued my searching/reminiscing. Over there is where that weird earth pony thought Trixie was a Canterlot student. There’s where I remember blushing after being called cute by an elderly unicorn mare. And over there is Trixie... Trixie… Trixie?! I dived behind a corner and peeked out. Yup, there’s Trixie, along with everypony in Trottingham. My former companion was standing up on her newly restored wagon/stage, paid for with slavery. Ugh, I see where this is going. Two guesses about what she’s going to do, and the first one doesn’t count... Trixie rose to her hind legs. “Come one, come all, for the return of the most magical pony in all of Equestria! The Great and Powerful Trrrrrriiiiiixxeeeeee has returned!” Fireworks sprung up from the floorboards, and the crowd went wild. I guess if you’re not the one taking the abuse, Trixie’s shows can be quite entertaining… ... Too bad I’m one of the ones who took her abuse. Looks like I’m not the only one who remembers that this mare can be a bitch, as a few ponies left the crowd grumbling the moment the fireworks went off. Hmm... maybe they can help me? We share a common enemy after all. ... N-no, wait… I... I'll ask them for help, but not so I can get back at Trixie. P-purely a logical choice, I assure you! Unlike what some fiction would have you believe, dragons aren’t magic proof. If I willingly make her an enemy, it’s only going to end with me returning to the Flim Flam brothers in a pink magic aura. Until I can figured out how to properly use my new fire-breath, I shouldn't go about picking fights. Besides… I don’t think I could honestly hurt Trixie. Sure, as soon as this muzzle is off I’m going to burn her stupid wagon to the ground, but I don’t think I have it in me to sink my claws or fangs into anypony, no matter what has happened. Well… maybe Flim and Flam... but I still owe Trixie for the shake at least. At least… “Watch and be amazed by Trixie’s awesome feats of might and magic!” … I’d better move on. I turned to make a move in the opposite direction of the crowd. I'm planning to use the back alleys to catch up to those who left the cheering crowd. I made to start running, but I instead ran face first into a goat and fell flat on my tail. “Baaaahhhh,” it bleated rather mindlessly. Um… I'm not quite sure what to make of this. I gingerly waved 'hi' to the derpy looking thing. It responded by licking my claw, removing the dirt from it. ... Ew... I'd better keep my eye on it. I don’t want it chewing on my new hai- “Iron Will is outraged! Iron Will requested this square a week ago, yet they gave it away to a talentless hack?! OOOOOoooooh, if a pony steals your spot, then KICK THEM IN THE PLOT!” “WHUH MHE MELL?!" I shrieked behind my muzzle. I tore my attention away from the goat and strained my neck looking upwards at the literal giant that was peering over the corner I was just stepping away from. My vision was now full of blue, muscly, minotaur action. Freaking Iron Will? Again, what the hell?! Firstly, how did he sneak up on me like that?! It’s impossible unless you’re Pinkie Pie! Secondly; first I met the brothers, and then I saw Pipsqueak, then the whole thing with Trixie, and now Iron Will? Is Trottingham just full of single use show characters? Is this where they all live?! Am I going to find Queen Chrysalis hanging out in a bar with Cranky Doodle Donkey?! The hell?! Fifty bucks, er, bits says that next thing I’m going to see is Gild- I was interrupted from my thoughts by my eyes catching the sight of a griffon flying by overhead… brown wings… … Totally a coincidence. “Dragon! Who did such a thing to you?” I snapped out of my stupor and turned my head to face Iron Will, who was now on all fours in an attempt to look me in the eyes when he talked. “Muh?” I replied. “This is inexcusable! Little dragon, if a pony tries to block, SHOW THEM THAT YOU ROCK!” And with that he ripped off my muzzle with his bare hands! Damn! I thought this thing was on pretty darn tight, plus magically enforced. Iron Will here just made a unicorn somewhere cry. Initiating kissflank mode. “-Gasp- T-thank you, Mr. Minotaur! That thing was starting to chafe!” He laughed heartily. “Hahah, no problem, little Miss! Iron Will couldn’t stand to see a little thing like yourself be put down by the man like that!” I carefully yanked my hair out of Iron Will’s assistant’s mouth. “The man? Um, who would that be, exactly?” Iron Will chuckled again. “Why, ponies of course! Don’t worry, little one; Iron Will was in your position long ago, back when he was a young calf like yourself. You just have to learn to stand up for yourself a bit more! Don’t be shy, look them in the eye!” He winked at me. “Consider that a free tip, on the house! Haha!” Oh wow, Iron Will is pretty cool! Helping me out like this… … Like Trixie did. ... Um, suddenly I’m a bit more nervous about getting his help... But wait, he’s not a pony, and he did say he was in my position long ago... M-maybe I can trust him? But... why would he be more trusting then Trixie was? Because he’s not a pony? ... Oh man, I guess the song was right. Everyone is a little bit racist. I decided to press for more info as adorably as this new body of mine would allow. I’m a bit too young looking to be using any womanly wiles… plus I’m not sure if I want the help of anypony who’s into that kind of thing, thus cuteness was the answer. ... What? Have a problem with me using my new sex to my advantage? Well tough. I'm desperate right now and willing to use everything at my disposal to reclaim some strand of normalcy. Man pride be damned! Channeling my inner 'awestruck little girl', I raised an index claw to my lips to help complete my act. “Really, Mister? Big old strong you was muzzled, put in a doggie carrier, betrayed by your friend, and electrocuted by two unicorns who wanted to use your fire for their demon machine?” Iron Will just stared blankly at me. I attempted to look as cute and innocent as I could. I swear I saw a halo appear above my head. Cutie Mark Crusaders, eat your adorable hearts ou- Glump Before I could even comprehend it, the minotaur suddenly wrapped me in a surprisingly gentle hug without me even noticing it. ... Da huh? Wha...? “… No... Iron Will did not suffer like that. Iron Will was spared such a fate thanks to his friends here.” He replied, motioning to his goat assistant with a free hand. “Baaaahhhhh.” Replied the goat. He then put what I assume was a reassuring hoof on Iron Will’s shoulder, which was closer to the ground now that he was on his knees hugging me. “…But that’s no reason to go hating ponies, little one.” Iron Will finished. I stammered in place, and my cuteness shield cracked slightly because of it. “I-I don’t hate ponies!” I answered hastily. Iron Will finally let up on his hugging. “Don’t try to hide it from Iron Will, little Miss. Despite that cute face of yours, you spoke with such venom in your voice when you mentioned the unicorns, and even more so when spoke of this so called 'friend' of yours. She or he was a pony too, right?” ... Damn he's good. “Um, well... yes... but I d-don’t hate ponies! I’ve just had some… bad first impressions... I’m sure that not all of them are evil!” ...! I clapped my claws over my mouth. Evil? Did I just call ponies evil?! B-but I love ponies! I love the show! I love the supposedly fictional universe it was based off of! I love the community! I… I loved it… … But... then what is this that I'm feeling? This... pain in my chest... This, all of this, has just been a terrible string of bad coincidences... ... Right? Knocking me out of my sudden funk, Iron Will put a reassuring hand on my shoulder… which was a little silly, as only one of his fingers could fit on it while the others had to rest on the rest of my arm. Despite this, it was the thought that counted. He smiled at me. “If somepony makes you frown, don’t let it keep you down.” Our moment was interrupted by loud yelling coming from Trixie’s stage. “Behold, as Trixie trumps your pitiful talent for dental hygienic care by showing you what a real set of teeth looks like!” “My mouth! My mouth is full of glass!” “Neigh foal! Trixie has simply gifted you with dragon-fangs! Surely you can care for them properly, hmm?” I winced. I think I forgot to mention it, but dragon-fangs suck. I’m constantly biting my new tongue. Over the last two days I’ve been getting better with them, but still... ouch. Iron Will stood up and returned his gaze to the stage. “… If ponies make you frown, don’t let it keep you down… AND IF THEY STEAL YOUR STAGE, WELL THEN THROW THEM IN A CAGE!” Well there goes calm, reassuring Iron Will. I guess he has a bit of an anger problem. The giant rubbed the back of his head with a hand. “Er... sorry about that. Iron Will’s got a bit of an anger problem that he’s been trying to stomp out.” Called it. “Well, again, thank you for helping me, Mister! Both for the muzzle and, well, for the tips as well. I’ll try not to think that all ponies are out to get me anymore...” He returned to looking down at me. “Not a problem… oh? Hehe, silly Iron Will; he has rudely forgotten to ask for your name, little dragon, and Iron Will has not given his!” He finished by holding his hand out to me. My claw could only manage to wrap around his index finger, but he still shook it as hard as he could, sending me flying up and down. “Iron Will’s my name and training ponies is my game!” I attempted to answer while being flailed around in the air. “Nnnniiicceee tttooo meeeettt yyyooouuuu MMMrrrrrr IIIIrrrrooonnn Wwwiiill! Mmmmmmyyyy nnnnaaammmeeess…” My mind blanked. Crap, I still haven’t thought up a convincing name yet! What was it that fans called genderswaped Spike? Spines? ... Yuck! No... I don’t quite like that name. Ugh, what to do…? Iron Will suddenly let up on his shaking, releasing my poor claw from his assault. “Iron Will is sorry, little one. He sometimes gets carried away, haha! You were say-” “Baaaahhhh!” His attention was suddenly directed to one of the goats, some of them having returned from whatever errand they were sent on. This one was pointing into the crowd of ponies. Iron Will raised his hand over his eyes and peered into the audience. “You spotted the mayor? Good! Iron Will needs to have a little chat with him about this injustice to Iron Will’s show!" Taking a knee, he dropped back down to my level. "Again, sorry Miss. You were saying?” It was at this point that I noticed how nicely Iron Will treated his goat crew. No, more importantly, I noticed that he referred to them as his friends, not his crew or his assistants. How... nice of him... Wish I had something like that right now. ... Maybe… I have a chance here. ... Okay, let’s try this. I cleared my throat. “Oh, well, you see, Mr. Iron Will," I began while reinforcing my 'cuteness' act. "I don’t really have a name… o-or a home, for that matter.” At my comment, Iron Will’s eyes grew wide for a brief second before they softened. Iron Will's face was long with melancholy. “... Iron Will sees. You're an orphan... your mother died, didn’t she? And Iron Will’s heard that dragon fathers tend to leave after their mate's eggs are laid...” T-they do? Wow, that… kinda hits close to home for me. I mean, mine came back for the third kid, but still… ugh, no! This is not the time for an introspective look into my mind! I slowly nodded my head for him. “Y-yes. I’m all on my own now. I’ve been on my own for a while now, ever since I hatched. I-I was never given a name outside of being an It.” Half-truths. I’m afraid I’m going to have to be very manipulative if I’m to survive here. I tried being truthful and look what that brought me… “… Frank? Come here a second.” Said Iron Will suddenly. Frank? How did Iron Will know my left claw’s nam-… oh. He’s talking to one of the goats. I see. “Bahhh?” Iron Will whispered into his ear. I couldn't make it out, but whatever it was it caused the goat to smile and nod his head to Iron Will before turning to look at me. “Baaaahhh!” The goat then lowered his head… ... And gently clanked his left horn against my left horn. He repeated the process with his right horn to my right horn. “… Wha?” I asked, quite confused. Iron Will laughed. “It’s a sign of trust, kid. By connecting horns, you’re proven that you trust each other enough to not be offended with the invasion of such a superficial thing like 'personal space'.” I blinked “Oh… but why-” He smiled at me warmly. “It’s part of a little ceremony sentient goats do to welcome someone into their family. Frank here did it for old Iron Will years ago, and now he’s done it for you.” ... ... Whoa. ... ... W-whoa! I was completely taken aback. I mean... just... w-whoa! I was just hoping for maybe a ride to Ponyville, or something, so I could ask Twilight for help in case the egg thing didn’t work out! I figured Iron Will would be doing a show there eventually, so why not? But this… this is huge. “F-family?! Does… does that mean…?” Frank answered by taking off his ear mounted headset and attaching it to my horn, its position being roughly where a pony's ear would be so it fit like a glove. He then removed his little name tag and attached it to my chest, causing it to stay there through the power of, I don’t know, magic magnets? Magic magnets... yeah, I can totally see Equestria having those. “Bahhhhh.” Iron Will slapped me on the back in a surprisingly non-painful way. “Welcome to the Iron Will Show, little dragon, where we help everypony to be the best that they can be! We know you’ll do us proud!” ... Damn emotions were running wild again. I was crying again for no good reason… other than the fact that I was really, really happy. “Th-thank you! T-thank you so much!” “Hehe. There’s no need to fear, so please, dry those tears... Hmmmm… that’s a good one. Think we could fit that one into a show, Frank?” “Baaaahhhh.” “Yeah... yeah, you're right. A bit too sappy. So what do you say, Miss?" Asked Iron Will. "My crew here will show you what to do for our show today, and then we’ll come up with a great name for you during your inauguration dinner tonight!” As the other goats roared in agreement, I had probably the biggest, dumbest, and silliest looking smile ever on my face all at the same time. Sure, I’m not planning on staying here in Equestria; I have a life to return to, a family waiting, and aspirations to start a family of my own someday. But... now I have the best thing ever; a safety net. If things don’t go my way and I’m forced to stay here… I won’t be lonely. I’ll have a family to ease my pain and with their help I can move on and continue living my life. I’m aware, however, that I’d have to say goodbye to this family if I do return home. Can’t have both after all… but somehow, I’m not worried. I feel like Iron Will would understand if I told him about my situation. I mean, he did break the fourth wall during his episode, so there’s a chance he knows about humans. All the same... I’m going to remain optimistic about this sudden turn of events. But first, hugs are in order. I jumped up and used my new wings to launch myself at Iron Will’s neck, effectively hugging him as hard as I could while making sure not to ruin his tie. “Thank you, Mr. Iron Will! Thank you so much! I promise not to let you down!” He patted me on the head. “Heheh, it’s no problem at all! And please, just call me Iron. All my friends do anyways!” “Baahh!” “Oh, right. Got distracted there, haha! Iron Will needs to talk to that mayor about the show. Come on, gang!” Iron gently removed me from his throat and placed me on the ground. He and the goats started walking towards the town square where Trixie’s show had ended and everypony was leaving. I followed at the back of the group, not being able to walk as fast as the rest of them thanks to my small legs. I’m going to need to figure out how to use my wings properly if I want to be able to pull my own weight for this group and to live up to my claim of 'not letting them down'. It's the least I can do for him. Suddenly, I felt something tugging on my hair. I tried to yank it back. “Oh, please stop that, Mr. Goat. I don’t like that very muc-” The tugging increased and I was yanked off my feet and dragged around the same corner Iron Will and I had just used. “Ow!" I screamed. "What’s the big ida-“ I was then gagged by something furry and… y-yellow?! Oh no, not again! My screaming increased ten-fold. “MELP! MELP ME!!” “Quiet down, damn it!” Commanded Flam. The slaver pony was sitting down on his haunches against the wall, using one of his forelegs to constrain my arms and wings against his chest, while the other arm was busy pressing down over my mouth. His brother Flim trotted up, glared daggers at me for a second, and then trotted away towards where Iron Will went off to. “Why hello there, Mr. Iron Will! Fancy meeting you here!” Flim called out. I could barely make out what Iron Will was saying from behind this corner, and also over the sounds of me trying to escape. Iron Will responded to Flim's distraction. “Oh, um, hello there, Flim. Out here by yourself today?” Flim replied good naturally. “Oh yes. My brother, Flam, is currently putting the finishing touches to our machine! I’m happy to say that it’s almost complete!” “Well, that’s good to hear than. It’s still running off of steam, right?” Iron Will asked. Flim laughed. “Haha but of course! The only other thing that could work would be dragonfire, but you know that’s both hard to come by and morally unjust, yes?” “Oh, well, yes. Just checking. Don’t take it the wrong way, Flim, but Iron Will doesn’t see you or your brother as ponies who have all their marbles together sometimes! Haha!” Flam sputtered something under his breath. “Coming from a damn minotaur...” I took advantage of Flam’s sudden lack of attention by opening my mouth as wide as I could... ... And then chomping down on the leg he was using to mute me with my fangs. I think I hit a bone too. Awesome. Flam bit his tongue and was doing his best to not scream out in pain, yet he clearly was in it. One of his hind legs was pounding on the pavement and his tail was waving around wildly. His mustache even drooped. I tightened my jaw. Scream, damn it. Scream! 'Scream for me like you made me for you!' I mentally wailed. ... Oh, wow. The land of talking magical ponies, which runs off the power of friendship, has turned me into a very violent person... Go figure. I think Iron Will was starting to catch on that something was amiss. “Hey... Flim? Speaking of dragons, have you seen a baby one around here? A young girl was just following old Iron Will here no more than a second ago.” That bastard, Flim, hummed to himself, like we was actually thinking about it. “HHHHmmmm, nope! Can’t say that I have, my good sir! Maybe it’ll pop up later?” Iron Will was silent for a moment before yelling at Flim. “Maybe she’ll pop up later, Flim. Not it. You and your brother best remember that we non-equines have a saying: if a somepony calls you an 'it', THEN THROW A FIT!” With the tone of voice used, I could clearly imagine the scowl that was on Iron Will’s face when he said that. Speaking from experience, maybe? Flim chuckled weakly. “Oh, um, o-of course, my good minotaur! Won’t make that mistake again! W-well, good luck with your show! I’ve got to get back to that brother of mine. C-ciao!” The fibber quickly trotted back to us. Coming around the corner, Flim took in the scene of his brother being mauled by a very pissed off dragon quite well, I thought. “Ah!" He quietly yelped. "No! That’s a bad dragon! No!” Flim used his seemingly infinite magic unicorn powers to hit me with a… rolled up newspaper? ... Seriously? ... Bitch please. I stared into Flim's eyes for a brief second, giving off the illusion that I was listening... … And then I bit down on Flam’s foreleg even harder. Flam winced. “B-brother! Help.” Flim was physically panicking. “Okay okay, let me think! Um… oh…” The mustacheless one's horn flared and I was encased in a green glow. Flim was trying to yank me off of Flam. Sorry to disappoint, but I ain’t leaving this without a souvenir, boys. “Owowowowo! P-pry open the jaw first, you idiot!” Flam screamed. “I’m trying, I’m trying!” Flim continued to panic. I could feel Flim’s magic starting to seep into my mouth and my jaw starting to let go. Slowly, I was levitated away from Flam’s leg. Flam breathed a sigh of relief. I decided to finally put my new tongue to the test by shooting it out of my mouth and wrapping it around Flam’s foreleg like a frog. I then yanked myself back and returned to biting him.Tasted nasty as hell, but it got the job of harming-him-bodily done quite nicely. “Hey, Frank... is Iron Will hearing a commotion back there?” Iron Will asked his assistant around the corner. Thank goodness, he's close by! “Baaaahhh!” “Crap!" Flim yelped. "The stupid talkers are coming back here, Flam! Retreat!” “Get, this, stupid, thing, off, me, first, Flim!” Flim started dancing in place. “Oh, what to do what to do?! Ohhhhh...!” Flam was suddenly hosted up to Flim’s back via magic along with me still in his grasp. He proceeded to gallop around another corner as Iron Will came back around. It was at this point that I took notice that my headset and name tag were now gone, probably having been knocked off in the struggle. Damn it all, not again! Don’t do this to me again! “MRON MILL!!” I tried in vain to yell. My voice fell on deaf ears, however, as the brothers were already galloping past the Trottingham gate, with me being dragged along in a combination of two auras. One to carry me and the other to close my lips. The last thing I saw was of Iron Will looking around a corner, trying to find out where I went, before the brothers threw me into some kind of sack. ***^*** My life became pretty formulaic after that incident. Wake up, get tortured by Flim and Flam’s magical and steampunky techno babble, get tortured by Flim and Flam’s magic lightning as they tested out various parts of their machine, get tortured by Flim and Flam practicing singing the same song over and over again, and get tortured by my stomach as it cried out for food. Somehow I was able to put sleep down somewhere in that obviously busy schedule. ... Did I mention that I didn’t like it here? As soon as they returned to their camp that day, Flam gifted me with a nice shiner with his good hoof for what I did to him. To this day, the leg I bit still has bandages wrapped around it and it still caused Flam to wince in pain every time he tried to trot anywhere on it. Good. From the few glances I could get from the numerous reflective surfaces scattered around their 'base', my damaged eye seems to have had recovered quite quickly, and I was already able to see out of it again only a day after the fact. Quick healing… this could be both a good thing and a bad thing if it means that I can last longer before expiring. Translation: I have lots of torture to look forward to… ... Ugh, bad thoughts. Knock that off, brain. Getting back to the boys; to make sure his brother wouldn’t get hurt again and so I couldn’t escape again either, Flim doubled the amount of safety precautions that kept me a helpless damsel in distress. Firstly, I was back in the doggie carrier, which had its lock rejuvenated through magic. To make sure I didn’t wreck it again they chained my arms together behind my back before they tossed me in. Secondly, to replace the muzzle, Flim and Flam instead casted a transfiguration spell on my lips, transforming them into a giant zipper which remained zipped. It was a simple fix, but the downside of the spell was that they had to come check on me every hour or so in order to reinforce it. This meant that they had to have someone awake in order to maintain the spell, or else I’d burn the cage bars open in the night and escape again... ... Or, at least they did have to do that at first, but they quickly came up with a solution. Two nights after the Trottingham escape, I was surprised to find out that both boys went to sleep. I decided to attempt another escape as soon as the spell wore off that night. This event led to me to discovering the third and last improvement they made; they had shrunk down the forcefield charm and placed it around the doggie carrier and the podium said doggie carrier was placed on. The result was me crashing head first into the bubble shield and slowly slide down the side of it until I was resting at its base, which was off the ground slightly so digging was also out of the question. Boy, if only you could have seen the scowls on their faces the morning when they found me… Grumble Oh, sorry about that. I guess providing exposition can make you hungry… that or only eating every other day. One of the two. Yeah, they’ve been getting away with only feeding me every other day. They only noticed that they hadn’t fed me on the second day after kidnapping me from Iron Will when my cage shook with the force of my stomach growling. It turned out that they were really unprepared for caring for a dragon, as they had to consult the freaking manual in order to figure out what it was that dragons actually eat. “Let’s see here, Flam." Flim began. "It says that dragons eat pretty much everything ponies eat along with gems, precious metals, and… -gasp-, m-meat?!” “That’s horrible, Flim! What a monster!” Hmmm, suddenly a pony burger sounds tasty… oh, with cheese too please! I gave the brothers an evil grin with my zippered lips. I was worried that the motion would be lost on them, but a glance, followed by shivering, from Flim suggested otherwise. This only made me grin wider… well, as wide as zipper lips could smile, anyways. “Well what do we do then, brother? We have to save the food for ourselves and the apples for our customers…” “I don’t know, Flim... Wait, it said precious minerals, right? Did you ever get rid of all those used lug nuts and screws, brother of mine?” “Oh! In fact I hadn't gotten around to throwing them out yet, Flam! I’ll go get a bucket now.” Flim trotted back into the garage, leaving the 'manual' behind on the ground near my set up. Might as well take a glance at what they’ve been reading. Oh, please let it be called 'How to Train your Dragon.' That would be hilarious. Let’s take a look here… 'How to properly care for your Dragon companion for foals. By Starswirl the Bearded. Property of the Canterlot archives.' ... Meh, I guess this universe can’t be laughing at itself all the time. “Here we go, Flam." Replied Flim as he came back outside with several items in his magic grip. "I brought some water as well. Got to keep it hydrated too if we want it to breathe fire! Oh, and I found some broken glass left over from that storm we had a few days ago, brother of mine. I figure we should give it some nutrition in its diet in order to keep it healthy.” ... How does that make any sense? Ugh, Equestria... why you no make sense?! “Good thinking, Flim. Okay..." Flam's horn began to glow. "I’m going to lower the field and open the cage. You put in some of the bits and the bowl and then once everything’s in I’ll close it up and you’ll unzip it.” 'Well... that’s not entirely an air-tight plan they have there. I could try to breathe fire at the cage while my lips are unzipped. Then, once the bars are melted I would just have to use my back legs and tail to fling myself forward at the still melting bars, hope that my scales protect me from the burns, and then use my wings to propel myself at the point where the shield was lowered. This should get me on the other side where I would then set these two bastards on fire and make another mad dash for Trottingham….' Yup, I had a pretty good plan set up at the time. The only problem though was that I hadn’t eaten since dinner with Trixie, four days ago! I barely understand how I’m still lucid enough to scheme after so long… also how I’m still alive. So I just sat there, curled up in my cage, as they levitated in a small tray of nuts and bolts with some broken glass on the side for 'nutrition'. They also brought in water for me in a… a-a doggie bowl. ... I ignored the bowl at first and began devouring the nuts and bolts. I had to rely on my snakelike tongue to pick them up and put them in my mouth. I’ve become oddly adapt at manipulating this thing ever since the episode with Flam back in Trottingham. Like the fast healing, I’m not so sure if this is a good thing or not, but for now it’s the only way I can get any food in me. Food… is such a broad term. Those nuts and bolts were nothing like hayfries; these didn’t have a hidden taste that I could never imagine them having. These tasted like nuts… and bolts. Nasty as hell, but I was so hungry at the time that I didn’t care and even afterwards I was still hungry so I started eyeing up the glass. 'Oh God, I’m actually considering eating glass!' The nuts and bolts were okay, as I just imagined eating hard candy and it made it a bit more bearable. But glass was still glass. I was not looking forward to this. ... Not like I could get at it anyways. I didn’t want to cut up my tongue. Super healing or not, I’m still eating glass. I tried to look pleadingly at the brothers in a hopeless attempt to get them to levitate it to me. I’ve learned a while ago that these guys are immune to cuteness. Obviously it’s because they lack souls. I tried anyways, only to discover that they had stopped paying attention to me and instead were working on their machine again. I guess at this point the zipped lips were just there so I didn’t talk to them. There goes that idea. So I cut up my tongue something fierce trying to eat freaking glass, followed by my mouth. Had to chew it up well enough so that it didn’t cut up my throat as well, after all. If glass had a taste I honestly couldn’t tell you… unless it tastes like copper then I could tell you that it tastes just like blood. That just left the… doggie bowl. "Oh please no. I don’t w-want to have to sink that low..." … But I was so very thirsty. Fire breathing is thirsty business, after all, but... "T-this is just so…" -Sob- "H-humiliating." After a minute, I shook away the tears that had escaped my eyes. I realized that crying wasn't going to solve my problems. If I’m going to get through this I’m going to have to swallow my pride and do what I can to keep on living. I’ve already had to put up with this kind of humiliation before, after all, when I discovered how they expected me to use the bathroom in this thing… by going to the bathroom in this thing. Gingerly, I lapped up the cool water with my sore tongue. Pure nirvana. ... That was sadly two days ago, and I’m still in this cage. I’ve been with the brothers for four days now, and they captured me on my second day in Equestria, so I’ve been here for six days now in total. During this time alone I started asking myself the important questions, questions that I probably should have been asking since I got here. Questions like... why? Why am I here? For what reason am I here in Equestria? And why am I a dragon? How am I going to get home? Has my family noticed I’m gone yet? And how am I going to get free? I never stopped asking that last one. I prayed for the last four days that Iron Will would be able to put two and two together and figure something was seriously wrong when my headset was discarded in the path that Flim took to leave. It’s still kind of out there and unlikely, but he said that we were like family now, right? Well… I guess it would make sense that he never finds me, after all I don’t remember seeing a dragon with him during his episode. I guess I can’t change the future… ... ... NO! No, I’m not going down that train of thought! If I do, then I’d have to accept that I’m going to be stuck in the brothers' machine until long past their visit to Ponyville. I have to keep fighting to change my fate... … But their machine is getting closer to completion with each passing day. Outside of pondering the answers to important questions, I’ve been doing the only other thing I could do: listen. The Super Cider Squeezy 6000 had been given its name only yesterday, and the brothers were looking at another two weeks before the last of their additions were added and they could begin traveling. Don't ask me what the 6000 is there for, I wasn't there for that conversation. Also, these so called 'additions' confused me. The machine seemed pretty much complete from what I could see in my cage. On the outside they had attached the couch like they said they would and added the podium I was on to the front of the machine along with a train’s cow catcher. Where they got that from I have no clue... or why such a thing would still have that name here. All the tubes and wires were there, along with the giant vacuum, and a window was added so all the customers could watch the apples being sorted. The apples were sorted through the use of a magic charm of some description and said charm was powered, as was everything else in the machine, by my fire. I also discovered why they needed my fire. Their machine was the equivalent of a gas guzzler in terms of steampunkery. The amount of steam used to move a train wouldn’t be enough to move this thing an inch let alone across Equestria. This was because, on top of moving the machine, they needed to also power the vacuum along with the internal processes that sorted and crushed the apples into cider. They also wanted me to power their gramophone. Cause hey, why not? Even their combined unicorn powers couldn’t do this, apparently, as it wasn’t 'pure' enough or something. The auras would conflict within the machine and cause processes to stop in mid production. Also, magic apparently has a taste and it could ruin the cider so they needed magic dragonfire, known as the only magic force in Equestria that doesn't have a distinct taste, to run it instead. They could have used steam in combination with their magic, like Iron Will suggested, but they still would have had to use a large amount of their own magic in order to keep everything moving. By the time they moved the machine to their customers they would have been too tired to sing their song, heaven forbid! So I was being electrocuted and treated like a prisoner because they were lazy... Figures. Oh, but I haven’t gotten to the best part of the Super Cider Squeezy 6000, have I? I didn’t tell you about my room! Yes, I get my own room in the damn thing, right inside the belly of the beast. There's only one way in and out of it and that way is through the trap door on the roof. Even though the room was filled with all the wires and tubes the machine needed, it was surprisingly spacious enough to fit me and another pony inside… … Although that pony would have to duck in order to avoid the second vacuum, as it would drop down from the ceiling without warning. It would only remain long enough to suck up my fire before rising to avoid me destroying it… which I did on purpose already during the testing stages. That act alone set the brothers back a few days! Ha! Anyways, I will be chained up to the opposite wall across from the vacuum by my arms. All the proper measurements have already been taken to assure that it would be tight enough to hold me and high enough so that my toes will only barely scratch (literal) the floor. My tail would still drag on the floor though, and I assume that was done on purpose so the forked portion can slide under my doggie bowl and lift it up from the floor. Using the tips of my wings to adjust it, I could then raise it high enough for my tongue to lap it up. Same thing could be done with the plate that was placed there; I could use my tail to shuffle any nuts and bolts on to it, lift it up, and use my tongue again to eat. My tail could reach up high enough to put the bowl and plate within reach of my tongue, but not high enough to pick my bind’s locks. There was also a little high-rise between one side of the room and the other to prevent me from knocking either the bowl or the plate away from myself. ... I honestly think this was the most these two had thought about me in my four and a half days in their care. During this time, neither of the two had so much as looked at me outside of the tests, nor did they ever talk to me directly. That is, until the fifth day... ***^*** "Zzzzz... W-wha? Ow!" I was rudely interrupted from my slumber by a green aura yanking me through the bars of my carrier and violently pulling me through the forcefield. It was like being pulled through a very tight hole in the wall that was constantly shrinking around you. In other words, it hurt like a bitch. “Okay, you damn talker, what the hell did you do?!” Flim roared at me. I blinked at Flim very slowly, trying to wake up fully. I decided to take advantage of being lifted off the ground by properly stretch out all seven of my limbs. That doggie carrier can sure give a gal a serious cramp. I yawned and rubbed an eye with a suddenly free claw. The bindings must have come undone when he yanked me out of the forcefield. I looked behind myself at my prison set up. Yup, there they are, laying there on the floo- “Answer me, damn it!” I shook my head and returned my attention to a very frantic looking Flim. His mane and tail were a mess and he wasn’t wearing his shirt or hat, which was something I found strange as he’s always wearing those things, unless he was sleeping. He must have just woken up, like me. “Well?!” I finally noticed that he was actually talking to me... The hell? My lips were unzipped as well, so he must have been expecting an answer. If I wasn’t so drowsy and my throat didn’t hurt so much from all the fire blasting I did for them yesterday, than I would have answered with a fireball to the face. Instead, I did my best to answer him with my patient brand of sleep based cockiness. I mockingly smiled at him. “Oh, I’m sorry, Flim. How rude of me. You’ve seem to have caught me at a bad time. I simply haven’t done my hair yet, as you can plainly see. So, to what do I owe the pleasure of this surprise meeting, darling~?” He stomped his hoof on the ground. “None of that, you bitch! Tell us why Trottingham is on fire!” That gave me pause, woke me up, and knocked off my cocky act all in one fell swoop. “W-what?” Flim continued to glare at me. “Yeah! Flam just got back from picking up a few things from our house and he told me that a fire had broken out over there! Orange dragonfire! What is Tartarus did you do, dragon?!” I was speechless. “But I-I didn’t do anything! I’ve been here the entire time! You made sure to that you...you... flankhole!” Facehoof… as in Flim connected his hoof to my face. Hard. Since I was still in his magic grip, I was sent flying backwards where I then bounced off the still active forcefield and was sent crashing to the ground. Note to self: flankhole means exactly what you thought it meant. Excellent. Flam came running up to us fully clothed, although both his shirt and hat were quite dirty and caked in mud and sweat. He must have been galloping quite a bit today... “Brother! The flames are around the campsite too! I doubled and tripled checked the Super Cider Squeezy 6000... it’s currently empty, just like it was last night! I can’t tell what’s causing all these orange fire spots, Flim!” “Damn it!” Flim responded before he actually stood up on his hind legs and started kicking me. “Tell, us, how, you did, it, damn, dragon!” I’d be impressed by this if I wasn’t crying uncontrollably. “I-I-I" -Sob- "D-did’t do a-a-anything!” “Flim, wait… where’s the egg?” Flam suddenly asked. “The egg?” Flim asked as well, before his eyes grew wide. “Mother of Celestia...” He then resumed the kicking. “Where’s, your, damn, egg, talker?!” I was clueless. “M-my egg? Wh-why would that…?” My mind suddenly returned to Trixie’s words from… a week ago. "Trixie thought a dragon's egg burns up on their own accord a week after hatching.” ... Oops. I thought I was forgetting something... Wait, why did my mind translate that from past to present tense? Also, when did my mind have stereo? I looked up from behind my claws. I was using them to shield my face from Flim's assault. I took notice that Flim had stopped kicking me and had instead returned to all fours. He was gazing out towards the main road… ... Where Trixie was standing in full garb. A smug grin was plastered on her face. “Hello gentlecolts and dragon... Did you miss Trixie?” Flim stepped forward. “What do you want you damn witch?! This is private property!” As interesting as this possible conversation was going to be, I had just spent five days mentally and physically tortured in a goddamn doggie carrier. Rather than stick around I decided to flee… or at least I was going to flee, until Flam caught me at the last second in his magic field and brought me back to the camp. There, a fierce conversation was taking place between Flim and Trixie. Flim had his mouth wide open in a look of shock. “… What did you just say?” Trixie laughed him off. “Ha! Trixie just casually mentioned that she finds it funny that Trottingham is currently engulfed in flames the same color as the ones your little dragon spews. Trixie thinks that the guards would also find this bit of information equally as funny.” I decided that I might as well add to the conversation while I was 'hanging' around. “S-surprise surprise. Blackmail again, Trixie? Wow... for a showmare you sure are a one trick pony.” ... Okay, truth time. I've been waiting a week to say that to her. I didn't have anything better to do... Trixie shot me a nasty look. I countered with the one claw salute. She shrugged it off and returned to her haughty appearance for Flim and Flam. “Trixie is here to offer a business proposition; her silence on the matter, for your place of living. Seems fair to Trixie, does it for you? You are going to go traveling after all.” The brothers were silent until Flim spoke up. “... Why you stupid, bucking, show horse. Here, I’ve got a business proposition of my own!” “Flim no!” Begged Flam, but he was too late. Flim ignited his horn in a brilliant display of green illumination. Using the magical energy forming at its tip, he shot a familiar arc of lightning (usually reserved for yours truly) at Trixie. Trixie’s horn glowed only briefly but long enough to conjure a black storm cloud as a shield in front of her. It absorbed the blast before evaporating, revealing Trixie with a fully beaming horn of light pink magic. She stood firm as the very ground around Flim shook violently. The earth beneath Flim suddenly gave way and captured the stallion in a large sinkhole, one that trapped him up to his knee caps. Flim’s horn glowed momentarily before being struck with a small clot of dirt, destroying his concentration and ceasing the glow. Every time he tried to re-ignite the horn another clot would strike it and cease that nonsense. Trixie trotted up to Flim casually, her horn glowing only slightly. She smiled wickedly. “Submit, foal. You are no match for Trixie.” Flim looked so incredibly pissed. Was it sad that this brought me an endless amount of joy? Flam sighed and stepped forward to put a hoof on Flim’s lowered shoulder. “Let it go, brother... she has us beat.” He then set me down on the ground and placed a hoof on my back in order to keep me in place. He lit up his horn again and removed a set of keys from his shirt pocket. “Here you go, Trixie, but I need to have your word that this stays between us.” “Trixie promises. You have her word.” I let out an audible laugh. “Whatever that’s worth.” Flam moved his hoof up to my head and pressed down even harder, burying it in the dirt. My horns stood up above the ground, however, so I heard the rest of the conversation. “Now get out of here and leave my brother and I alone, Trixie.” “Oh, but you seem to be mistaken, Flam. Trixie needs you to leave now. After all, you are now on Trixie’s private property!” I heard Flim yell. “That wasn’t part of the deal!” “Trixie has changed her mind... pray she doesn't change it again.” I could hear Flim growling. Flam sighed again. “No Flim. She’s right. We’ll just gather our things and be on our way, Trixie.” “Good. And get that ridiculous machine out of Trixie’s new garage. She needs room for her stage wagon!” ... She… she just kicked two ponies out of their own home! She’s not just a bitch, she’s pure evil! Flam picked me up out of the dirt and held me at a distance with his magic. He helped Flim out of his hole as well and they split up; Flim going to the camp site in order get dressed and to pack up their things, while Flam took me to the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000. He opened the hatch and attached my struggling form to the wall. The last I saw of the brother was when he threw in my bowl and slammed the hatch shut. All the while, Trixie was laughing. Laughing the entire time. Laughing at us. Laughing at all of us. And thus the journey for success began