//------------------------------// // The End // Story: I Miss You, Girl // by TheTimeSword //------------------------------// The Past – They were taken to another room in the clinic. The assistant called it the relaxation room, Applejack called it the death room. It was where the families of the pets were taken to say their final goodbyes as they were put to sleep. It was a small room with two soft chairs and a large fabric stool squared in the middle. They placed Winona on the stool that was just large enough to hold her. The assistant had been asking them questions about how they would like it to be done. Applejack made the decision to cremate Winona, something she herself did not ever want for her own body. She wanted to be with her best friend forever, and burying her didn’t seem like the way to do it. Taking her body out to be buried behind the barn was not something her best friend deserved, this gave her a place in the Apple home forever. Another decision was asked, whether to have the medicine take her quickly and be put out of her misery, or to have the medicine take her slowly so that it felt like she was falling asleep. Applejack chose the faster route, knowing that no matter her decision it would not be enough time with her pal. Applejack sat holding both Winona and the stool, crying her eyes out over her best friend. Granny Smith sat on the other side, petting Winona’s back. Winona still barked, but had calmed down and had worn herself out from all the stress. Hours had passed since they first arrived. “I’ll let the vet know your decision, and he’ll be back in just a moment,” the assistant said. “Alright,” Granny Smith replied as the assistant left the room. Winona’s collar had been removed by Applejack and placed on a chair. She rubbed Winona’s neck and kissed her face over and over, tears flooding down her own face the entire time. She looked up at the boxes on the wall. There were three different types that the animal’s ashes were returned in. Applejack already picked it out, the light brown rectangle of a box would do for her best friend’s ashes. The coloring of the box almost lined up with Winona’s shade of brown. The box came with a name plate on it of the cremated pet. They sat in this room crying, which felt like an eternity to Applejack. She wanted to get it over with and she hated that she felt that way. Nothing hurt more than choosing to have your best friend be murdered in front of you, something she hoped would never turn out that way for herself. All Applejack could think about in this time was the mistake she was making. She thought about waiting, but knew that even if she did, her best friend would still be in pain. The vet finally returned with two needles. “Alright, so this one will simply knock her out. The second one is a little something like morphine, except mixed with the first needle it’ll create a chemical imbalance. Essentially, it’s just an overdose. She won’t be in any pain,” the vet explained. Applejack nodded and leaned back to allow the vet some room. He stuck the first needle in right above her paw, then the second one. Applejack and Granny Smith sat around her, crying with their forelegs on Winona. The vet held his stethoscope to Winona’s chest to hear her heart slowly stop. He finally pulled back the stethoscope and said, “I’m truly sorry for your loss. Take as much time as you need.” “Thank you,” Granny Smith replied as he closed the door. Applejack sat there repeating the same words over and over, “I love you baby girl. I love you.” She cried over Winona’s body for quite some time. Winona’s eyes were left open, unable to close no matter how much Applejack tried. Applejack kissed her forehead and her cheek. Finally, she got up and grabbed the collar. Granny Smith opened the door before saying goodbye to Winona one last time. Applejack stared at Winona, tears in her eyes, she soaked in the sight of her best friend once more. One last mental picture, one last time she’ll ever see her best friend. When they returned home, Applejack left the house as Granny Smith explained to Big Mac and Apple Bloom what had happened. Apple Bloom had started to cry, only to be comforted by her big brother. Applejack headed to the barn. She smashed bottles, threw hay, even breaking a mirror. Letting out her emotion was the only thing she could do. Anger and sadness filled her like hot tea overflowing from a cup. She felt guilty for having allowed her best friend to be killed. She felt sorrow for having to make the only choice she could. She spent several hours in the dead of night bucking trees and smashing random things outside. Tears could be found wherever stuff had been broken. The bright moon overhead only helped in guiding her destruction. Once she finally returned to her home, everyone was shut in for the night. Granny had told them to leave her alone, she knew that any conversation would upset Applejack more than she already was. The first place Applejack went as she entered the house was Winona’s bed. She sat, lying next to it, crying and holding Winona’s collar. Her tiredness had caught up to her. The long day at work, and the stress of losing Winona had been too much. She held Winona’s collar as she pulled the blankets off her own bed, dragging them down the stairs. Throwing the sheets on the couch, she snuggled up in them, wrapping herself with Winona’s collar in her forelegs. The thoughts of what had transpired clouded her mind, breaking her concentration on trying to sleep. Had she done the right thing? Should she had tried for more time? Should she have gotten the second opinion from Fluttershy? All the bad thoughts she could think finally caught up to her after the bout of destruction she had caused to the farm. Applejack held the collar close to her heart. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Forgive me.” She cried. Worse than she did over Winona’s body. Applejack had family and friends, but no pony could compare to Winona. Winona was her most trusted companion. No friendship or relationship could compare to the bond she had with Winona. She was part of the Apple family just as much as Applejack. All these thoughts finally parted, her tears stopped as she eventually fell asleep on the couch. She still held the collar tightly in her grasp as she dozed off. I love you, was her final thought as she drifted off to sleep. The Present, Four Months Later – Applejack awoke from her slumber on the couch just before the sun had started to rise. It had become a normal routine for her to get up at the crack of dawn to go do some jogging. She would run three miles in the morning, then three miles at sunset. It allowed her to clear her mind and prepare for the day or the night. Hearth’s Warming Eve was soon to be upon them, the first Hearth’s Warming without her beloved pet. Every year Winona would get a gift that she would tear open herself. She was a smart dog, she knew there was always something good underneath a neatly wrapped exterior. Whether it was treats, a chew toy, or a ball, she always knew which one was hers. A look back on the previous years filled Applejacks mind the night before, and so this run was especially difficult as the thoughts flooded back in. Within the four months, Applejack had finally felt her grievances leave her, and she was eventually happy once more. Talking to Winona’s ashes seemed to help her cope with the loss greatly, even to where she continued to do it months after the fact. Of course, last night had been extremely difficult. Not just because of the thoughts that filled her mind, but because it was the first time she had slept in her own bed. The couch had become her spot to sleep, and none of the other Apples argued against it, but Applejack finally felt it was time for her to return to the old sleeping habits she once knew. Her back hurt the entire time she jogged around the orchard, her neck felt like it was going to snap off. Even the little tendons at the top of her hooves felt stiff and rough. The sun had peaked over the mountain range and shined down on the orchard just in time for her to finish the jog. She grabbed a drink of water, showered, and went back to bed. Her eyes were exhausted, but her brain wouldn’t allow her to drift off to dreamland. Every position felt uncomfortable to her, and her mind had been filled with the adrenaline of the run and the sleeplessness of the night previous. The same thoughts had returned to her, the ones she had the first few days after Winona was put to sleep. Did I do the right thing, will I get to see her again when I die, what would happen if I died, she thought. She groaned in pain as she covered her face with a pillow. Four months doesn’t seem like a long time to most, but after a while, you eventually feel numb to the pain. Happiness returns to your heart in its place. The only difficult part was when the numbness faded for a brief moment, kicking happiness in its shins. Applejack removed the blanket that covered her and got back out of bed. If there was no point in trying to get some sleep, then she wouldn’t have it. Back down the stairs and onto the couch she laid, staring up at the ceiling was about the only thing she could do in the wee hours of the early morning. Looking over at the shelf that held Winona, she couldn’t help but yearn for a chance to see her again. She stood back up from the couch and walked over to the shelf, placing her hoof on the paw imprinted clay circle. “Winona, I’m sorry. I just want you to know that. Well, I’ve been rememberin’ some of the times you and me had together.” She cracked a smile. “Like the one time you caught a bunny rabbit in your mouth and brought it back to me. I thought you had killed the darn thing, but it turns out you were tryin’ to get me to save it…” A long pause filled with silence lingered as Applejack held her best friends collar close to her heart. “Wherever y’all are… I hope you’re better off. And maybe, I’ll get to see you again one day.” Another long pause. “Just know, I love you with all my heart… and that…” She smiled as she held out the collar in front of her, tears running down her cheek. “I miss you, girl.”