Applejack whistled a little tune to herself as she scrubbed the railing of the ship. Glancing behind her, she saw Li’l Scoots, groaning, head hanging painfully, one little hoof pressed firmly against her forehead. Her mop was balanced loosely in the crook of her foreleg. She was not getting any mopping done at all.
Applejack cracked a smile. Gotta learn young. She stopped whistling to give Li’l Scoots a little peace, and bent back over to continue cleaning. She didn’t stop until she could see herself reflected in it, and she gave herself a winning smile before moving on.
She looked up at the horizon and then paused. Out in the water there seemed to be blotches, swimming under water. She squinted. Sharks? No, sharks were gray. She could swear that these were colored like a pony would be.
And whatever they were, they were heading towards the ship.
Applejack looked back, but Li’l Scoots was not looking her way (and still had her head buried in the crook of her foreleg). She was debating sounding an alarm when a pony’s head burst out of the water, quickly followed by a second. Applejack took a shuffling step back and dropped her rag in shock. Ponies overboard?
The orange mare in the water grinned. She ducked down and then launched herself up out of the water. She seemed to remain suspended in the air for a split second… and then she pursed her lips and sprayed Applejack with water.
Applejack spluttered and scrubbed at her face. “What the hay-?” she demanded. They were ponies, yes; but what kind of ponies had flippers for forelegs and fish tails where their hind legs should be?
And what kind of greeting is spitting water in somepony’s face?
But when she’d cleared the seawater from her eyes, the ocean was devoid of any pony, seapony or otherwise. She frowned and scanned the sea again.
“Slacking, apple mare?” came Octavia’s voice, a little bit louder than needed.
Li’l Scoots grit her teeth and groaned again, and Applejack could almost hear Octavia’s mouth curl up in a cruel smile. She quickly picked her rag back up. “Applejack,” she corrected again as she resumed cleaning, but now she kept a wary eye out towards the ocean.
* * *
Applejack looked forlornly at her plate. The food was great. Dinky had really outdone herself, and they'd gotten enough supplies recently to get all kinds of good food. Honestly, if she closed her eyes really hard, she could almost pretend she was back at home for a bit.
Still, she felt guilty. Rainbow had been on fire recently; they'd been raiding ships left and right, and since Applejack couldn't or wouldn’t reveal the location of her island, the raids continued. She poked at her food with her fork. She felt guilty somehow, like it was her fault that Rainbow was stealing from so many merchants and sailors.
“She'd do it anyway.”
Applejack jumped as Surprise slid onto the bench next to her. “It's in her blood. She'd do it anyway.”
“How did you…?”
“Were you surprised?” Surprise asked.
Applejack nodded hesitantly.
“Well, there you are, then!” Surprise said, as if that explained everything.
Applejack pursed her lips, but didn't respond. She had the distinct impression that she'd keep her sanity better that way.
“It's working, though.”
Applejack raised an eyebrow.
“She liiikes you,” Surprise giggled, leaning in and brushing the top of her head against Applejack’s shoulder, acting like a filly half her age. “Keep swishing your tail and you'll have her clothes on the deck in no time.”
“Ah don't want her clothes on the deck!” Applejack protested.
“Whose clothes going where?”
Applejack jumped as Rainbow Blitz herself appeared. She grabbed a plate and slid it haphazardly down the line. She started serving herself, dumping food onto the plate that overflowed their boundaries and got all mixed up. “Whose clothes where?” she repeated.
“Uh…” Applejack said dumbly.
“Are they mine?” she asked with a playful smile. She looked Applejack in the eyes and ran her tongue across the front of her teeth.
Applejack looked desperately around for some excuse to get out of the conversation. Surprise kept a wide smile on her face, clearly not about to help. Octavia stared with half-lidded eyes, but made no move, either. In fact, as she looked around, it seemed that everypony around was either blatantly listening, staring, or had an ear cocked in that direction. It was obvious that she was on her own with this one.
She started to a sweat. “Well…”
Rainbow began to eat even as she narrowed her eyes at Applejack. “You want to see me naked, don’t you,” she accused. “Get me all nice and naked with my flank bare? You wanna see my cutie mark?”
“Wait, Ah- No, well… it’s…” Sweat trailed down Applejack’s brow now. “It ain’t that, ‘cause ponies don’t normally wear clothes, you know? But…”
Her eyes narrowed even further. “You want to taste my cutie mark, don’t you?”
Applejack blushed bright red even as the sweat dripped down her cheeks. She toyed with her hat. “That… that ain’t it at all…” she stammered.
Rainbow held her expression for a few moments before she suddenly cracked up laughing, which was slightly disturbing as her mouth was still full. “It’s ok! Your captain is one fine looking pony,” she said. She swallowed, then winked.
Applejack managed a shaky smile and resumed eating.
Rainbow stuffed the last bite into her mouth. “Well, I can’t say for certain; but if you keep it up, you might just find some of her buried treasure.”
Applejack choked on her food. Rainbow Blitz burst out laughing again and headed out, having finished her food in almost ten seconds flat. She swatted Applejack on the flank with her tail as she passed.
Surprise sidled closer to Applejack. “Did you mean to do that?” she asked as soon as Applejack had stopped coughing.
Applejack pulled her hat down further to hide her embarrassment.
Surprise patted her on the back comfortingly. “You'll do it intentionally someday,” she soothed.
“Ah sincerely doubt that,” Applejack grumbled.
Surprise’s eyes brightened and a small smile played at the edges of her lips. Her voice seemed to rise in pitch with every word, until the last one was almost a squeak. “Are you saying that it would be a… surprise… if you did?”
Applejack turned to glare at her, but Surprise just giggled and flounced away. Applejack scrunched her nose. She couldn’t wait to get off this ship.
* * *
Dinky watched as Applejack walked away. She turned to her mother. “Can you believe she’s been on board for two months?”
Derpy nodded. “It’s been a long time, hasn’t it?”
Bon Bon made a ‘hmf’ sound. “That’s really weird, come to think of it. I wonder why she hasn’t just given us the cider and moved on.”
“Maybe it’s because she really likes pirate food?” Lyra suggested.
“Nopony likes pirate food that much,” Bon Bon scoffed, ducking just in time as Dinky chucked a spoon at her head.
Dinky scowled, and then relaxed a bit as she leaned in and motioned the others in, too. Bon Bon held back, but Dinky’s scowl returned and her hoof motions increased in intensity. When she had come in, Dinky spoke. “I think it’s ‘cause she has a crush on captain Blitz,” she whispered, “but doesn’t want to tell anypony.”
“Nah,” Bon Bon said, sitting back. “No way. Captain Blitz is cool, but she’s not exactly marefriend material.” She leaned in slightly, and Lyra squeaked and squirmed under the table. Apparently, Bon Bon had decided to demonstrate which of the ponies at the table was marefriend material.
Derpy glared. Seriously? In front of Dinky?
“I dunno,” Shoeshine threw in. “She’s pretty crazy herself, and she talks funny. Maybe she likes the crazy mares.”
“I’m just not seeing it,” Raindrops confessed.
Derpy snorted and gestured at her eyepatch. “I’m half blind and I can see it. She’s got it for Blitz, bad.”
Bon Bon considered this again. “Does Blitz know?”
“Does Blitz know what?”
The crew jumped as Rainbow Blitz herself appeared. She glared as she met each pirate’s eyes.
“Uh…” Derpy said, biting her lower lip.
“Captain Blitz knows all,” Rainbow intoned. “And she doesn’t take kindly to ponies hiding things from her.”
“But doesn’t that contradict your previous statement?” Shoeshine blurted out.
“Shut up,” Rainbow said in the same voice. “Captain Blitz cares not for your logical answers!” She turned and strutted away. As she left, the crew exhaled, relieved.
“So… she doesn’t know Applejack has a crush on her?” Dinky wondered aloud, too young to really consider the implications of sharing that.
From her position hovering outside, Rainbow smirked. “Oh, she knew,” she whispered.
“Oh, I think she knows,” Surprise added.
The other ponies jumped. Where had she come from?
Surprise picked up a spoon with her tail, and dipped it in the pot. She picked up a chunk of something out and flicked it out, caught it in her mouth, and slurped it up. She grimaced as she swallowed, and stuck her tongue out.
Dinky’s hoof edged towards a spatula.
Surprise continued. “Anyway, she knows. I’m sure of it.”
Most of the crew knew not to go against Surprise’s intuition. This, however, gave rise to another question.
“So why hasn’t she done anything about it?” Derpy asked. “You know, what with the whole ‘what Rainbow Blitz wants Rainbow Blitz gets’ thing?”
Shoeshine shrugged. “Maybe she’s just scared?”
“Excuse you!” Rainbow spat, dropping back into the conversation. The pirates jumped; but none trembled quite so much as Shoeshine. Rainbow strode forward, and Shoeshine scrunched herself against the deck, trying to present as little a target as possible. “Rainbow Blitz is never scared. Rainbow Blitz always gets what she wants. And you’re going to know that when you’re swabbing the entire poop deck tomorrow on your own!” And with that, Rainbow Blitz disappeared, leaving behind only her trademark rainbow contrail.
There was an awkward silence.
Dinky finally broke it. “They’re gonna do big pony things tonight, huh?” she asked.