Dan Vs. The Magic of Friendship(Season 1)

by Barrobroadcaster


Mirror Darkly: Above All Else

"Greetings, herr doktor," a familiar voice said the moment Vice stepped off the elevator. He looked up to see his guest waiting for him in the atrium of the elevator, not the lobby.

The human known as Dan leaned against the far wall, a thin trail of purplish smoke leading from the end of his lit cigarette to the ceiling. At equal points in front and surrounding him, blocking off the hallways to the left and right were Celestial Guards, the elite of the Imperial army. All four of the guards were alicorns covered head to hoof in polished white armor. Each wore an ethereal cape that resembled Celestia's mane and carried a long flag emblazoned with the banner of the Solar Empire. The top of their flag-staffs was tipped with a halberd and the other end was a shotgun barrel. Arguably, it was one of the most patriotic, albeit inefficient weapons ever created: you could shoot and stab someone with the Empire's flag though it would probably break immediately after.

Dan took another drag and smiled at Vice. "The resistance keeping you busy?"

Dr. Vice Grip ignored the question. "There's no smoking here," he strode over to him, intent on putting out the fag one way or another.

"Ah, you caught me," Dan said, holding the cigarette away from him. "My little dirty habit. Surely, you can show a little leniency given the extreme circumstances?"

The human was rubbing it in and Vice knew it. He ignored the obvious bait and grabbed Dan's cigarette, pinched it and put it out. "What do you want? Why are you here?" The guards around him inched closer, prepared to intervene if Vice laid a hand on Dan. But neither of them made a move. Dan simply stood there, brandishing the same smile.

"No time to chat, herr doktor? The rebels must've created a great need for your expertise, no doubt. Very well, is there somewhere we may speak privately?"

Vice glared at Dan. It was clear the human was determined to drag this out. "My office is down the hall," the doctor said, glancing at each of the guards, knowing there wouldn't be enough room for them all to fit in the office. "Follow me."

Dan snapped his fingers once and then held up two fingers close together, some sort of military hand signal Vice had seen them use before. The guards immediately relaxed their posture, about-faced and walked down either hallway. Where they were going, Vice did not know nor care. If they were leaving his hospital, all the better.

Vice led Dan down the hallway to his office. A few robots, the modular three-armed, three-eyed Mr. Capapples hovered by on their jets. Everyone and everything was hard at work to treat the patients. Not because they had to or because it was their jobs but because it was just the right thing to do. And the two of them were just walking by like reflections in a mirror.

But Vice was trying to save lives, too. If it meant doing this little dance with Dan, he'd do it.

They arrived at Vice's office, a door that was actually near one of the building's fire exits. The two doors were side-by-side, so close that if they were mislabeled, one could easily trigger the fire alarm by opening one. The two entered the cramped office, a room only slightly larger than a broom closet and barely big enough for Vice's desk. He wasn't in there often and it showed.

"Please, sit down," Vice said, acknowledging that Dan had already taken a seat. The human pulled the seat forward and began pulling things out of his pockets and placing them on Vice's desk.

Vice walked around to the desk and took a seat behind his personal monitor. "You know I'm busy, Captain, so please, if we could dispense with the pleasantries, I'd very much like to get back to running this hospital."

Dan pulled a final item out of his pocket and placed on the desk. He then proceeded to take off his watch, barely paying Vice any attention. He looked up at the stallion and grinned. "We're a lot a like, you know that?"

The doctor inhaled and exhaled, realizing his instructions would not be listened to. "No, I'm afraid I don't see the resemblance."

"I think it's obvious," the human said. "We both love our work. You do, don't you?" he said, taking off his watch.

"Very much so," Vice had to admit. "I don't believe there's anypony or any person out there beyond help. I try to make this hospital a place where they can come and get it."

"You've done a very good job," Dan said, still smiling. The human picked up his cell phone, a larger and older-looking model, and attached the watch to the end of it. "Too good of a job."

Vice leaned forward, noticing the trinkets Dan had pulled out. "Too good of a job? What exactly do you mean by that, captain?"

Dan flashed a knowing glance at Vice. "Come now, herr doktor. I think you've made it clear you're not interested in wasting time, so please don't waste mine." One of the items Dan had out was an MP3 player. He connected the music player to the watch that was strapped to the end of the phone, attaching it to the face. Dan then took the car alarm from his keychain and slid it into his cell phone's display.

The doctor stallion sat back again. "I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about." If Dan was going to be coy, so could he.

Finally, Dan completed his tinkering. He fixed the key to a car he no longer owned to the end of the MP3 player. The ear buds of the music device, he attached to the bottom of the phone, connecting it to the battery charger. He then tapped a few of the phone's numbers and pointed it, key facing forward at Vice Grip. "I'm talking about the members of the resistance you're treating illegally in this hospital."

Vice didn't know what to make of the device Dan was holding. The only thing he knew is that it was obviously threatening. He fought the urge to stand again. "Theā€¦ resistance? But I'm not a member of-"

Dan turned the contraption in his hand at Vice Grip's monitor. He pressed the car alarm button and a bright red beam fired from the key end. The beam lit up the console, causing its screen to explode from behind and shower the doctor with sparks and smoke. "AAAAHH!!" Vice stood, avoiding the melted slag that was his computer and braced against the back wall, unsure of what would happen next. Breathing heavily, he looked back to Dan who was still seated, pointing his device at Vice.

"This is called a phaser," Dan explained. "It was part of a top-secret weapons project in the Terran Empire before it fell. I'm afraid to say that this little baby is the only completed prototype, something I was working on back on Earth."

Vice stared at the weapon, now realizing the full extent of the threat he faced. Dan had lured him into a trap, one even Lightning Claw might not have seen coming.

"At maximum setting, it's capable of total particle disintegration. If I charge this up to its full capacity and hit even the edge of your hoof, your body will be broken down at the subatomic level and reduced to a vapor so fine it won't even condense into dust for at least a decade." Dan raised the weapon and aimed it at Vice's head. Vice could only watch as the key that made the phaser's emitter glowed red.