Utaan

by Imploding Colon


It's All You Can Dash

“Or m-maybe not,” Rainbow Dash said, wincing.

She stood in the foyer of a three story stave-building filled to the brim with patrons. Wooden beams stretched over weary travelers bustling to and fro, chatting with one another, and munching heartily at a veritable buffet of rice and fish placed across long oaken tables in the center of the rustic tavern. At the far end, several Rohbreddenites sat before a thick stone hearth with a crackling fireplace. While a few elders shuffled up, the younger ponies filed out, gladly offering their seats to the wrinkled arrivals. Ponies of various ages and backgrounds took the opportunity to chat with one another, bursting with anticipation for the Month to come.

“Good heavens!” Rarity exclaimed. “It's like a shopping center during the twelve weeks of Hearth's Warming!”

Twilight Sparkle grimaced. “Of all the innumerable Equestrian things you could have compared this to—”

“Well, it's not like you were coming up with something any faster!”

“I don't need to!” Twilight retorted. “What's important right now is that we find Rainbow a way to remain inconspicuous!”

Rainbow grunted as a few tall stallions and mares brushed past her. Half of the patrons pivoted, then swiftly apologized while performing the same gesture as the travelers outside.”

“Er... yeah.” Rainbow hugged herself, shook, then brushed her right fetlock up past the length of her left foreleg. “Back at ya...”

“I'd say she's getting better at the inconspicuous part!” Pinkie said, humming pleasantly.

“Hmmmm...” Fluttershy craned her neck. “You know, Rainbow, I've never noticed before.” She held her hoof out at the other ponies' heads, then lowered it down until it was level with Rainbow's crown. “But you're awfully peti—”

Don't start,” Rainbow growled.

“Hello there, little one!” A mare in an apron stumbled up, standing breathlessly before Rainbow Dash. “Welcome to Four Brazier Inn. Will that be teeth's fare or lashes' fare?”

“Uhhhhh—” The conical hat slumped forward. Wincing, Rainbow lifted the thing back. “Huh?”

“Oh. I'm sorry.” The innkeeper smiled bashfully. “I keep forgetting that not all ponies are from Seed Prefecture.” She cleared her throat. “'Teeth's Fare' means dinner, and the rate is five bits per pony. 'Lashes' Fare' means shelter for sleeping, and the rate is eight bits per pony.”

“Really?”

“I know. The rates are up due to the huge rush of pilgrims returning home to celebrate Unification Day.”

Fluttershy stuck her head in. “Did she say 'Seed Prefecture?'”

“What happened to Osmanthus?” Rarity remarked.

“Whew-wee!” Pinkie giggled. “Dashie sure knows how to get around!”

Rainbow hissed over her shoulder. “Shhhh!

“Hmmm?” The innkeeper blinked curiously. “Something wrong, Miss?”

“Erm... I just...” Rainbow adjusted her hat. “...didn't realize this was a different Prefecture.”

“Where'd you come from?”

Rainbow sweated. “Uhhhhhh...”

“Heehee... lemme guess.” The innkeeper smiled. “The Middle Seas.”

“Huh?”

“Just that lots of ponies from the small archipelagos shave their manes so that they can swim better.” The mare shrugged. “Or so I'm told.”

“Oh. Right. I'm... uh...” Rainbow glanced left and right. “...Twipie of the Nealend Atoll.” She belched out the side of her muzzle. “Whoop.”

“Oh bother...” Rarity rolled her eyes.

“Wait...” Twilight squinted. “Who did she say she was this time?”

“Heeeee!” Pinkie leaned in, nuzzling Twilight's lavender cheek. “You hear that, Twilight? We're being baked together!”

“Buh?”

Fluttershy giggled.

“Anyways...” Rainbow fidgeted as more locals shuffled past her. “How much for... erm... Tooth's Fare again?”

Teeth's Fare, ma'am.” The innkeeper smiled pleasantly. “And five bits.”

Rainbow fiddled a hoof through her saddlebag. In so doing, her peasant robe slid open slightly. The Element of Loyalty glinted in the light from the fireplace. Grimacing, she yanked the bits out, adjusted her collar, and dropped the coins into the innkeeper's grasp. “There ya go. Uhm...” She narrowed her ruby eyes. “Is it 'all you can eat, or...'?”

“Help yourself,” the mare said, smiling. “But if you're paying Lashes' Fare, then we kindly ask that you limit your stay to two hours. There are lots of travelers marching the Silt Path, and each of them needs a meal to stay the course.”

“Guess that makes sense. Thanks.”

“And thank you, Miss Twipie.” The mare hugged herself, shook slightly, then brushed a right hoof across her outstretched left forelimb. “May Verlaxion's Thawing Warm You.”

“Oh... uh... totally.” Rainbow smiled, mirroring the gesture as well as she could.

The innkeeper slid the bits into her apron and trotted off to greet more waves of patrons entering the front foyer. Rainbow was forced to shuffle towards the center of the tavern or else risk being bumped into by more bustling ponies.

“That went better than I expected,” Rainbow said.

“Rainbow, I'm surprised at you!” Rarity exclaimed.

“What for?” Rainbow muttered under her breath while swimming her way towards the rice table.

“Don't forget!” Pinkie swam through the crowd, phasing in bursts of pink and lavender light. “Her name's 'Twipie' now! Heeheehee!”

Rarity sighed, then floated close to the pegasus. “You have enough bits! Why not rent yourself some shelter for the night?”

“Because...” Rainbow held her hat tight with one hoof while trotting towards the table. She struggled to keep from bumping into conversing equines on either side of her. “...I've got the energy to keep going.”

“Then why even eat?” Rarity remarked.

“It's not enough that I make my way east anymore,” Rainbow said. “I've gotta keep up an appearance.” She threw a look over her shoulder. “You saw how quickly she noticed that my mane was friggin' missing. Imagine how strange it'd be if I just turned tail and trotted out the same way I came?”

“She's got a point there,” Twilight said.

“There are so many blasted ponies in here, Rainbow,” Rarity said with a smile. “I seriously doubt anypony would notice!”

“Maybe not now, but when the Talon that Keris spoke about combs through here?” Rainbow shuddered slightly. “They'll be asking for any details of weird ponies who stood out. I don't wanna leave any more awkward an impression than I can afford to.”

“You... y-you really think it will come down to that?” Fluttershy remarked, gulping.

“It's not a question of if, Flutters. Only when.”

“But...” Pinkie bore a sad puppy dog face. “Keris is your friend, isn't he? He helped you save Red Barge!”

“And now he's gotta save his feathery scalp,” Rainbow droned. “Face it. The guy's got a job to do. And that involves wrangling me up. Maybe he's a cool enough guy to spare me at first glance, but I can't say the same about his brothers and sisters in the guard. From the way he describes them...” Her bound wings twitched beneath her robe. “...they sound pretty hardcore. If I stick around here for too long, my goose is cooked.”

“Huh?” Fluttershy grimaced. “Who on earth would ever want to cook a goose?”

Rainbow sighed, reaching the table. “I rest my case.”

“But, still... I don't see why you can't stay night,” Rarity said. “I mean, if the goal is to keep from looking out-of-place...”

“Did you see the moon last night, Rarity?” Twilight asked. “Before we reached the shore?”

Rarity blinked. She gasped. “Do... d-do you really think Luna will be able to reach us tonight?”

“It's possible,” Rainbow said. Another tavern worker shuffled up, placing down several freshly-cleaned bowls. Rainbow swiftly took one before the crowd around her could. Using a pair of utensils, she shoveled as much rice into her container as was manageable. “And if I open communication with her, it can't be he.”

“Yes...” Fluttershy shivered slightly. “That might... attract attention.”

“So, right now... let's just chillax, blend in... and gather our bearings.” Rainbow tilted her head up, spotting two lofty levels looming above the bottom floor. “And I think I know just the spot.”

“Good! Get a booth if you can!” Pinkie said.

The other three mares glared at her.

“What?” Pinkie shrugged. “Chairs make my fluffy rump ache!”


“Say... saaaaaaay...” A harbor master swiveled on the dock, pointing with a grin. “Yes. Yes! Come to think of it, I did see a mare with the most extraordinary head of hair!” He chuckled. “Every color of the rainbow! Just like you described!” He exhaled, brushing his bangs back. “Whew! Thought she was some... exotic dancer or some shit!”

Seraphimus and Keris stood on the metal platform situated at the mouth of the Sunset Tract. The horizon behind them bled a poetically fitting crimson as they collectively stared at the stallion in their shadow.

“Please, good sir,” Keris spoke calmly. He adjusted his limb within his sling, wincing slightly. “If you could tell us all you know about this mare's whereabouts, it will greatly assist us in our search.”

“What's she in trouble for?” The stallion smirked. “Did she do that to you?” He pointed at Keris' limb.

Keris took a deep breath.

Seraphimus spoke up for him: “A terribly ferocious beast did this to the Lieutenant. The sooner you fill us in on what you saw, the quicker we can get to preventing an even worse fate from befalling other citizens.”

Keris clenched his beak shut. His hawkeyes glanced up, spotting the three Sergeants hovering loftily over the docks.

“Hmmm... can't say I'm too keen on ponies getting beaten to a bag of battered bones,” the dockmaster muttered. “Especially with Unification Day around the corner.” He smirked. “Well, I doubt the good Captain knew anything about the dangers of this colorful prey of yours when she allowed her to board her cargo ship.”

“Captain...?”

“Captain Farouche,” the dockmaster explained. “One of the most trustworthy, friendly traders of these routes. Around these platforms, we like to call her 'Furthest Ouch!,' on account that she has a habit of kicking stallions in the balls for so much as flirting with her! Hahaha!”

Seraphimus took a deep breath.

“How very friendly,” Keris said with a subdued smirk.

“Heheheheh... yeahhhh...” The dockmaster crossed his rear legs. “I got 'inducted' into the fan club a decade ago. Still feel it every time I do naughty push-ups, if you catch my drift. Heheh...”

“Please, sir,” Seraphimus stifled a growl. Her charcoal eyes glinted beneath her helmet. “Do you know where she went to?”

“All I know is that the mare goes by the name of 'Rarishy.'”

Keris blinked. “'Rarishy?'”

“Yeah, and she sold her motorboat to Captain Farouche so she could have the bits to take a steamboat up the Sunset Tract.”

“So she's heading east?” Seraphimus remarked.

The stallion shrugged. “Most definitely. Probably headed straight for Riverstem. I mean—anypony who's anypony in Osmanthus Prefecture stops by that town. But I bet you buzzards know that. HaHA!”

Seraphimus nodded. “Yes. Thank you. On behalf of all of Verlaxion's buzzards everywhere... you've been most helpful.”

“Hey.” The dockmaster shrugged. “I'm happy to serve.”

Keris bowed slightly. “We must be on our way—”

“Oh! Say...” The dockmaster gestured. “While I have you guys here, maybe you could clear something up for me.”

Seraphimus breathed, “We really... really must be goi—”

“What is it, citizen?” Keris asked. Seraphimus bit her beak shut.

“There's been chatter all across the waves over the past two days!” The dockmaster blinked wide. “Dozens... hundreds of traders say that there's been a new shift in the seven seas' tide!”

“Oh? In what way?”

“Word is that the rat bastard of Red Barge bit it. Skagra! Stripped of steam! Hah! Can you imagine?!” The dockmaster grinned. “That makes the muck instantly friendly overnight! I mean... whew! First the Syndicate takes a dive... and now the Barges are clearing up? It's like Verlaxion's gift for this year's Month of Thawing!” The dockmaster suddenly blinked, jaw agape. “Saaaaaay... did...” He gulped. “Did you come from the Barges?”

“Mmmmm...” Keris nodded. “That we did.”

Seraphimus looked over. “Lieutenant—”

“Woo! I knew it!” The dockmaster slapped his knee, grinning wide. “Leave it to the Rohbredden Guard! You guys finally up-and-did it!”

“Did what, good sir?” Keris asked.

“Cleaned up shop in the Barge, of course!” The stallion leaned back, folding his forelimbs. “Flew in there with your armor all a'glinting and wiped that smug grin off both of Skagra's dirty faces! Hah! And here I thought the Council didn't care about us sea foamers!”

“Actually...” Keris leaned back with a calm breath. “That wasn't us.”

Raptr and Starstorm fidgeted high above.

The dockmaster blinked. “It... it wasn't?”

“No. I'm afraid the Talon had nothing to do with the liberation of Red Barge.”

“Oh... huh...” The dockmaster blinked. “Well, wh-who did?”

Keris turned his head, smiling calmly... patiently at Seraphimus.

Seraphimus exhaled heavily. “Divine. Providence.” Fwooosh! Her wings flapped, carrying her body skyward. “Come, Talon. Take wing.”

Keris whistled up at Windburst.

Windburst reached into a satchel beneath his crossbolt quiver and tossed the Lieutenant two coins.

Keris held them out to the pony. “For your troubles.”

“Heh... what troubles?” The stallion smirked, holding up the coins. “Good luck with catching your mare!”

“Much thanks.” Keris winced as he forced his body into a swift flight. “I'm certain we will need it.”

Seraphimus waited for Keris to catch up. Sweeping her forelimb, she pointed towards the estuary. “We head east! Follow the Sunset Tract! Fan out and check the shoreline terraces!” She sliced against the wind. “We meet in Riverstem at Moonrise!"