//------------------------------// // Memories // Story: Adoption: Spot // by Bluetree650 //------------------------------// Chapter 2: Memories         Off in the distance, Twilight could see the cloud home of Rainbow Dash.         She had spoken to her son about something that would make him feel more at home in her palace, and he mentioned how, when Cloudy Melody was alive, he lived in a cloud home. Not an extravagant one like Rainbow’s, equipped with three different rainbow falls, but a simple box that was easy to pull and was made of cumulus clouds.         Twilight had noticed during her take off, that Spot clung a bit too tightly to her neck, and whenever he looked down, he’d whimper. She didn’t want to make a big deal about it. He’d told her about his mother but two hours ago, and she couldn’t bring herself to deal him another blow over being scared of heights. “That much Cumulus isn’t going to come cheap, Twilight?” Rainbow Dash leaned against the cloud window just about her cloud front door, her rainbow mane lightly sticking to one side of her cyan face. “Cumulus are used all over Equestria, number one water holder. Small beds of the stuff can go for fifty bits.” Twilight pushed Spot away from one of the pools of rainbow. If one taste could send Pinkie Pie into a near catatonic state, she didn’t want to know what it’d do to a young colt. “And I’m sure you can get me a discount,”   Twilight wasn’t the kind of pony to pull strings. Sure, she was Celestia’s right hand mare, but she never, ever, abused that position. The worst she’d done was ask for help with the rent, and that was after spending three days in a panic trying to come up with the bits. To Rainbow, hearing her ask, without hesitation, for a discount, was more out of the blue than Fluttershy smacking someone in the face. Rainbow took off, doing a few flips before floating down to her porch. She eyed the colt, those red spots eyeing her, and smiled when he didn’t shy away. “Something special about him?”   “He’s my son, Rainbow,” Twilight’s words came with a flash of anger, “I just want to do something special for him, okay.” “No need to get mad, Twilight,” Rainbow put her hooves up, “It’s just not everyday my friend asks me for a discount on clouds.” Twilight looked down at Spot. He didn’t seem afraid, or overwhelmed by Rainbow Dash’s “awesomeness” as she puts it, but he was weary. “You know how I adopted Spot, right?” “Yeah, you wouldn’t shut up about it.” Rainbow said,  sitting down on the cloud, sending tiny puffs of the stuff out in either direction. “What about it?” Twilight sighed and took a step forward, “well Spot is my son, so I feel it necessary to do something for him every now and again.” “Look Twilight,” Rainbow got up and puffed her chest out before looking the other mare in the eye, “I get it. You want to get a good bit of cumulus for your new son, and you think that because I'm the weather manager here in Ponyville, that I can get you a hookup or two.” Suddenly Twilight went wide eyed, “I didn’t mean to assume, Rainbow, I– if you can’t do it then I’ll just pony up and pay the full price. I was just trying to–” “Calm down, Egghead, I have the connections,” Rainbow said with a thin smile, “who do you take me for, an air head that can’t back herself up?” Spot tugged on Twilight’s wing, “Mom,” he motioned for her to move closer. She did and he whispered into her ear, “I thought she was full of hot air. Am I wrong?” Twilight looked at her son before bursting out into rough laughter. “Hey! What did he say?” Rainbow shot Spot a glare, surprised when he didn’t back down. “I’ll have you know, squirt, that I am the only pony in equestria that can pull of a sonic rainboom!” “I’m sure he’s just messing with you, Rainbow,” Twilight said, pulling herself together. “Well, I never saw Rainbow do anything really cool, just heard her praise herself again and again. How am I supposed to know? Where’s the proof?” “Stop pushing her buttons, Spot,” Twilight smacked her son in the back of his head with her wing, “I’m sure she’ll show you just how awesome she is soon enough.” “Yeah,” Rainbow spat, “then we’ll see who’s full of hot air.” Twilight, Spot and Rainbow slowly migrated inside of Rainbow’s house. Rainbow gave Spot permission to look around and the colt was quick to agree. The remaining two made their way into the cloud kitchen, after Twilight told Spot not to touch anything. “Twilight,” Rainbow said, leaning against the table, “who is that colt?” The kitchen itself had a lot of things other cloud homes wished they had. A stove instead of a thundercloud, a refrigerator instead of a snow cloud, a microwave, a sink. Every single piece of technology would fall straight through the cloud if it hadn’t been for Twilight’s gravity proof spell. Most unicorns couldn’t gravity proof anything bigger than a poster, some of the more expensive gravity proofers couldn’t handle anything Rainbow had, but Twilight was Princess Celestia’s student, and one of Rainbow’s closest friends. “He’s my son.” Twilight’s words held a deadpanned tone. “Not by blood, Twilight,” Rainbow’s eyes gained a hardness Twilight only saw when the mare was truly passionate about something. She never thought that something could be her son. “He reminds me of my psychiatrist's son.” Just as quick as it came, the hate in Rainbow’s words died out and she gave a longing look up her stairs where Spot had gone. “My Psychiatrist killed herself almost a year and a half ago.” The last two hours had been hell for Twilight. She couldn’t see her son the same way after she learned what he’d been through. He seemed so frail, so pale and hurt now. She’d taken him out to lunch at the Sun Shack, but even with a full stomach and a smile on his face– He looked so broken To make matters worse, she couldn’t tell anybody. The amount of pity he’d get from the townsponies. The gifts, the unneeded attention, he wouldn’t survive! But to tell the secret to someone that pretty much knows it already, someone that apparently cares about Spot and could easily be convinced to keep the secret… secret. To tell the element of loyalty something that’s eating you inside like a parasitic worm...   “Do you know his mother’s name?” “Cloudy Melody!” Twilight all but chirped.         Rainbow blinked. She blinked again, and suddenly her eyes went wide. “Oh… my… Celestia!”         “Rainbow, I need you to keep it a secret until I can figure out what’s best to help–”         “Twilight!” Rainbow shouted, “I’m his godmother!”         “What…” It was Twilight’s turn to blink. And blink. “What are you saying, Rainbow?” Her words were a warning. Why she made it that way, she couldn’t rightly guess.         “I didn’t want to do it. I’m not good at the whole taking care of a child thing,” Rainbow nervously floated in place, scratching the back of her neck. “Cloudy, you know, helped me out a lot. I – well, I see the world in a new light thanks to her. So, when she asked, I kinda couldn’t say no.”         “I don’t care about the story, Rainbow! You’re not taking my son away from me!”         Suddenly Rainbow turned aggressive, “I made a promise, Twilight, one I signed a stupid document over. As of five years ago, if Cloudy Melody were to die, I would take Blazing Spotlight in. He’s my godson.”         “Mom”         Both Rainbow and Twilight shot menacing glares at the voice daring enough to interrupt them.         Spot flinched, “I just want to ask, Rainbow if I can borrow this book. You don’t have it in the library, and I kind of wanted to read it.”         The interruption did give Twilight enough time to think. She of all ponies shouldn’t be arguing in front of a child that’s been through what Spot went through. “Are you kidding me Spot, I saw that book on the shelf yesterday.” “No!” Spot all but spat, “I checked yesterday and the book wasn’t there.” Rainbow seemed to break free from the anger at that. “Twilight, don’t tell me you don’t have Daring Do and the Sapphire Stone! That’s the one that started it all!” Twilight thought for a moment. Rainbow was the element of loyalty, and she was Spot’s godmother. She couldn’t say no to anything that’ll help Spot! “I think it’s a good idea, Rainbow! He could read it on his new cloud bed”   Rainbow might be dense enough not to notice the ponies swooning over her affection,  but she wasn’t blind to the way Twilight articulated cloud bed. “I guess he can borrow the book, but I’d like it back in a week, alright?” Spot smiled and said his thanks before heading outside to get a better light. When he was gone, Rainbow spoke, but in a darker tone, “but I can’t give you a discount on that cloud bed Twilight. I'm suddenly not in the most generous of moods.” She narrowed her eyes, “maybe go see Rarity?”     Twilight backpedaled, lifting a hoof as if to defend from a blow. She wanted to say something, but she knew when she’d been beaten. “Okay, Rainbow,” there were no malice in her words. While she may be Spot’s mother, Rainbow was his godmother, and to fight with her wouldn’t look too good in his eyes. “Do you know where I can buy cumulus for cheap? I’m just talking the best you can think of off the top of your head, no insider’s deal or anything.” “Gray Skies up in Cloudsdale. He’ll give my godson a bed big enough for two. Me and him.” Twilight flinched. She said nothing and left. I woke up in the middle of the night. It was thursday night and I had a belly full of pizza. My head felt heavy and I fell back, only to realize that I was alone on the floor. My home was but a box of cumulus clouds, but to me it was the safest place in the world. I didn’t care that every other cloud house in Cloudsdale had a thunderhead stove, or cloud furniture, or even a bed. As long as I had my mother, the world was right. Picking my head off the soft cloud, I wrapped the blanket tight around my back. Mom left the floor door open and it was letting the cold night air wander inside. Bleary, I looked at the pizza box next to me. Not having a stove meant a lot of take out. The kids at school were torn between that; some say it’s bad and home cooked meals should be mandatory, while others are extremely jealous. Mom didn’t seem to mind, so why should I? Stretching my wings, I smiled. I tried my best to be a role model child, for my mom. I loved my mom. Yet, here in my box home, I felt the need to be a kid. Here I could whine, invade Mom’s personal space, beg for little things like a flying lesson or a candy bar. Outside, while I spend most of the sunny days there, is a place filled with rules. I have to be respectful all the time, watch what I say, and never, ever, push a filly around. I want to just be a kid, make mistakes, not think about the repercussions of my actions. Inside I could, outside I couldn’t. “Mom,” I whined, hoping she hadn’t gone too far, “Mom, I'm cold.” That gets but a chuckle from her inside, followed by a quick hug, or one of the way too many blankets she keeps in the corner, but if I had done that outside, she would have given me a quick slap to the back of the head. I don't like being slapped, who does? There was no response. “Mom? Mom where are you?” I looked to my left, debated grabbing the last slice of pizza. Cold pizza was always better than warm, but I promised Mom I’d save it for breakfast. I turned to the right and saw a piece of paper. Grabbing it, I read the word WILL before throwing it down. I could do that here and not get a slap to the back of the head. Stretching felt good in the mornings. I felt my bones creak and crack with euphoric results. I wobbled a little when I finished, giggling as I fell to the floor. “Mom, come on, I'm tired. Please come back.” Again, no response. I shuffled over to the floor door and poked my head through. There were times when Mom would drag the cloud home to random locations. It was light, and with the gravity proof harness, even I could tug the place a few feet before giving out. It normally happened on the days Mom had off. She’d taken me to Fillydelphia, Trottinghoof, Manehattan, and my favorite, Ponyville. Today, when I poked my head out, I saw none of those, but a giant chasm. Ghastly Gorge. “Mom!” I shouted at the top of my lungs. There was no response, but even with my blurry eyes I could see a pegasus flying off in the distance. Quietly, I took flight. While I wasn’t the best, I could go in a straight line and keep myself from falling to the ground in a great big splat. “Mom, please come back, I’m tired and you’re the only thing warm enough to get me to sleep!” I shouted, shaking at the bitter winds being dredged up from the seemingly bottomless gorge, “I won’t hog the blanket this time!” No response. I was getting worried. I did something I probably shouldn’t have. I’d seen in WONDERBOLTS the magazine dedicated to the stunt flyers themselves, Spitfire closed her wings to gain speed. Mom didn’t like me going too fast. She feared I might really hurt myself.         I didn’t want to, but without a response, what choice did I have? I couldn’t catch up to her using the technique she taught me. Slowly I tightened my wings – feeling the seemingly arctic air cut into my red mane and black fur. I shivered and felt the pull of gravity truly take hold. The dry stony ground of the gorge came closer, faster. My heart pumped adrenaline through my system and I felt it pulsing through my veins. “Mommy!” I shouted, my voice cracking. I saw the figure stop at the edge of the gorge. She had on the bright yellow jacket that Mom always wore when she took me to school. “Mom I'm scared!” Faster and faster, I felt my control slowly slip when Mom jumped. I couldn’t stop myself and started doing flips in the air. The world was spinning and I screamed. I’d lost control before. Everything looks scary. The ground, once safe, now loomed like a dagger glinting in the moonlight. The walls of the gorge swallowed me like it had Mom. I screamed again. In the fleeting moment in my flip I saw Mom’s bright green eyes. They were half closed, and suddenly opened so wide I thought her lids would rip. “Open your wings!” She shouted. Her words were like a soothing balm, and I followed them immediately. Opening my wings, I slowed down drastically, and was only able to regain control of myself with the help of the heavy winds being dredged through the gorge itself. “Mom!” I watched her fall. She was dive bombing just like Spitfire did, but instead of fluffy cloud, she’d hit hard earth. “Mom!,” I started hiccuping as fear pulsed through my veins, “Open your wings Mom!!!” I had never thought about losing my mother. It was inconceivable. In a flash I saw all the times I’d been bad. That tiring day where I whined about my food outside, the time I failed my math test. I got smacked on the back of the head, but I thought that was all. I didn’t think… “MOM!!” I screamed, tears streaming down my cheeks. I didn’t know how to react. Should I close my wings and try to save her? Could I even save her? “Open your wings mom! PLEASE!” I couldn’t save her. She was too big, too heavy for me to carry. I froze, my body went rigid as the sound of cracking bone and mushing brain echoed throughout the canyon, like biting into a crisp apple. I thought of dropping as well. Following in her footsteps and ending it all for no damn reason came through like a lightning bolt. I was too scared to go through with it though. Slowly, that crunch still ringing inside my head, I descended. I thought about what I was going to do next! Mom was dead. “Mommy!” I landed and ran to her side. She lay limp, head crushed like a watermelon. Blood, brain, and bone shards littered the ground like candy wrappers. Her body was still intact, from the first glance, but I knew when I touched her, things would jiggle. “Mommy?” I spoke like I expected her to answer, “Mommy… let’s go home, Mom.” I shook and put my hooves against her chest and pushed. “Mom, you need to fly me to school tomorrow. Tommy said he had an extra thunder cloud. You could make me lunches instead of giving me money… mommy?” My legs collapsed and I couldn’t feel the wet patch of my mother’s blood beneath my rump. I cried. “Spot?” A voice from above. Mom was already cold. She was dead. “Mom,” I whimpered, “why Mom. I…” I couldn't speak as a warmth wrapped around my stomach. “Spot, wake up.” Twilight. I looked up to see the gorge falling apart. The walls disintegrated into little particles that simply floated down. The ground and sky did the same, leaving a blackness that I knew were my eyelids.     Twilight had planned to make a stop in Canterlot after seeing that Cloudsdale was nowhere near. Spot had cowered before Celestia. While she couldn’t blame him, Celestia was five times his size, it hammered in the fact that he looked so damn helpless. She had kept herself together, which in turn kept Spot from running around and screaming his head off. Celestia had told her that Cloudsdale was close by: just off the horizon about three miles north of Canterlot, and that it was coming closer by the hour. She also told her that by the time she’d reach the city and found her cloud shop, it’d be night. Twilight wanted to blame Rainbow for her lack of preparation. She had every right. It was her fault the overpowering thought of losing her child took hold. How in Celestia’s name was she supposed to know, Rainbow was Spot’s godmother? Celestia made a few jabs to her student’s pride. Twilight wanted to smack her. Making fun of her was alright, but not when there could be a possible lawsuit looming over her head.  She took the bits for one night at an inn. With shame, Twilight left the castle. The return trip was harrowing enough with pulling what felt like fifty pounds of cloud and carrying a twenty pound colt on her back, but apparently Cloudsdale wasn’t moving towards Canterlot, but away. Celestia had a way of messing those she cared for, either that or she didn’t know to begin with. To top it all off, Spot was afraid of heights. A pegasi afraid of heights: even so, she didn’t say anything about it. If she was lucky he’d tell her, but during the fly there and back he just clung to her neck with his eyes closed tightly. When they got home, Twilight set the cloud up in the guest room on the highest floor. She admired Spot’s diligence in that he was able to set up all the pictures he had on the wall in such a way that you felt watched by Cloudy Melody. With the cloud setup, Twilight collapsed, dreadfully exhausted. She woke up as Spot was having a nightmare. “Spot wake up!” Twilight shouted. What little sleep she got had done wonders for her sanity. She could see straight and focus on a single thought again. The white pegasus opened his eyes and let out an ear splitting scream. He rolled off the bed and clutched his tail, curling up into a ball on the hard crystal floor. What sleep in Twilight’s eyes left instantaneously, leaving a dull thudding in the back of her head and what felt like bleeding in her ears. She climbed over, wishing that the cloud was like the ones in the inn, lumpy, but it felt amazing and she wanted nothing more than to fall asleep again. “Spot, it was just a nightmare,” her words felt slurred and her vision blurred, but she could see well enough to levitate the colt closer. “Open your wings – open your wings – Mom, open your wings.” The ramblings of a lunatic washed over her like an ever growing scream. Spot’s eyes were but pinpricks and he shook like a leaf in fall. “Blood. Bone, Celestia she’s like some cheap Nightmare Night decoration!” He took in a breath, tears falling down his cheeks, “MOM!!!” Twilight winced, a migraine quickly turning the left side of her vision fuzzy. “Spot, it’s alright, I’m right here.” Her words meant nothing to him. She might as well have been a stranger. Even with five months of preparation under her belt, the hard lesson that somethings just can’t be prepared for sunk in like a ship in the cold, merciless ocean.    Wracking her frail brain, Twilight could only think of one thing she could do. Quickly, she pulled Spot into a hug, wings working better as soundproofing material than she’d once thought, and stroked his head. “She’s dead – She’s dead – my mommy is dead and there’s–” he went silent, no more screams or words of death, he just silently shook against Twilight’s chest. With her first moment of reprieve, Twilight looked out to see the moon hovering over the horizon. She must have slept for a good four hours. Wondering if Spot had slept besides her or joined later, she looked down at the ball of fur in her arms. Spot looked up, as if sensing his her movement. “Everything’s alright, Spot.” It might have been the wings or something else, but this time her words registered and he finally began to relax. “Just take a few deep breaths, here, I’ll do them with you.” Celestia knows she needed them. Twilight took a lungful of air and held it for four seconds before slowly letting it out. She repeated this until Spot could make enough sense to join her. The two took at least twenty deep breaths before he spoke. “I just want to be normal, Twilight,” his words didn’t shake, but they were heavy with dread. “I don’t want anyone fighting over me, or dying because of me. I just want a normal childhood, one where I can make risky choices, run into the everfree, steal a pie, and know someone is there to set me straight.” He looked up at Twilight again, whom was still getting over how Spot didn’t call him mom, and rested his head against her chest. “Cloudy set a lot of rules, but she let me be me.” He paused, “I dreamed of her death. I saw her fall head first into Ghastly Gorge.” Twilight figured it was the cloud that brought these nightmares. Demons repressed, now set free to torment their victim. “You’ve been through so much, Spot.” “Why did you have to fight with my godmother?” Twilight blinked, “What? You heard that?” “I think the ponies on the ground heard you.” Spot went silent. “I just want a stable life, Twilight. No drama or death, just somewhere I can feel safe, and parents I feel loved by. Is that too much to ask!!”  Words failed to form in Twilight’s brain. She stayed silent until the sound of quiet sobs came from her son. She tightened her hug, “If all you want is somewhere to call home, then you already have it.” “W–Wha?” Spot sniffed and rubbed his eyes. Twilight kept her words calm the best she could with a migraine. She opened her wing, letting him see the room bathed in darkness, “this house is one where you can feel safe, and I,” she pointed to herself, “am someone that loves you for you.” There were a few grunts and whispers as he tried and failed to speak. After a moment, Spot fainted.