Dear Cadance:
You mean... you could be my mommy?
YES!!! I ACCEPT!!!
Your new daughter, Scootaloo.
Dear Fax Machine:
That was Action Comics #1. Supermane's first comic. The single most sought after comic in the world. And you burned it.
When I am done with you, there won't be enough to identify you as a dragon. Or, for that matter, as anything that was ever alive.
Very angrily, Shining Armor.
P.S.: What I do with my Sailor Moon comics is none of your business.
Dear Fax Machine:
Though you may have fucked up Shining Armor's comic book, you still have a chance of redeeming yourself. I want my brother delivered to my bedroom tonight. Preferably bound so he won't try to escape. After that I want you to keep Cadance occupied so I won't be bothered. Try helping her with that chicken she decided to adopt.
Do not fuck up my night, or I will make you wish you never came out of that egg.
Sincerely, Twilight Sparkle.
Dear Shining Armor and Cadance:
I just heard the news! Congratulations! I hope your baby will be a beautiful little bundle of joy!
So... may I be the godfather?
Sincerely, Discord.
Dear Cadance:
Congratulations! I can already tell that your foal will be a big bundle of joy!
So, seeing as I am undoubtedly going to be the godmother, I'd be happy to teach your child everything I know. Wouldn't that be great?
Your loving aunt, Celestia.
Dear Cadance:
Since I'm the only pony qualified to be the godmother, I obviously deserve certain... privileges.
Basically, your husband has to spend some "fun time" with me.
You can start next week. Don't worry about tonight, I already have plans.
Your favorite sister-in-law, Twilight Sparkle.
Dear Luna:
Would you like to be the godmother? You're the only pony I can trust.
Sincerely, Cadance.
P.S.: Please help me rescue my husband. His crazy sister is holding him hostage and has her Fax Machine as a guard.