"Damn, this place is nice."
Perhaps that wasn't the best thing to say when we entered the throne room, as I was promptly met with a shush from Twilight.
After trying to muster up the most convincing annoyed look I could, I heard a voice that can only be described as something along the lines of a personification of angel food cake.
"Twilight Sparkle. I see you captured the human."
I looked to the source of the voice, only to meet with another alicorn. So this is "Princess Celestia". Somehow, I'm not surprised in the least by her appearance. At least that name isn't as saccharine-sounding as "Sparkle". She was noticeably taller than the others, her height giving a clear sense of power, and more importantly, intimidation. Her fur was quite possibly the purest white I could ever remember seeing, as if this pony was the single representation of everything good in the world. That goes for double with that rainbow mane that seems to defy all laws of physics. I mean, seriously, it's flowing in the wind, yet this is a castle. We're indoors. There isn't any wind. I've gotta say, that's impressive.
The look she was giving me, however, was not one I enjoyed being looked at with. It wasn't a look of scorn, or hostility, mind you, but more something of a careful curiosity. Still, I get the vibe that if this Princess is a representation of good, I sure as hell wouldn't want to be something she considers bad.
"Yep. He was about to get impaled by the guards when I got ahold of him." Twilight looked so proud of herself. "I figured you would want him captured as fast as possible."
"Yes, thank you, Twilight. Please, put him down."
The bubble surrounding me vanished, only for me to fall onto my back with a loud thud.
"Agh... jeez, you couldn't have done that any gentler?" I slowly got up to my feet to see Twilight, who, wouldn't you believe it, was actually smiling a bit. Yeah, laugh at my pain, why don't you?
"Whoops, sorry," she said, going back to trying to keep a serious demeanor.
"Twilight, if you don't mind, I would like to speak with the human in private," said Celestia, who had started eyeing me a bit more intently for some reason I couldn't imagine.
"Alright, Princess." Twilight turned, gave me one last look, and left.
So I was now alone in the throne room with the ruler of this whole land and a few guards. The idea that I was nervous goes without saying, but what I was more concerned about was the way she was staring at me. It was in a way that seemed gentle, yet still forceful at the same time. Mostly a look of concern, perhaps some confusion sprinkled in there. Or maybe it's a look of sadness?
Apparently, I'm not good at reading facial expressions. Look, the overall fact of the matter is, it was making me fairly uncomfortable. Thankfully, after a short moment, she broke the silence between us.
"Step forward, human." I obliged as carefully as I could.
"I have two questions to ask of you. First, what is your name? And second, why have you come here? If you can answer these, I can consider sparing you any form of imprisonment."
Oh. Come on now, really? Is this the direction this is going in? How the hell do I even answer that? You know as well as I do that I've got no idea why I'm here. Hell, I don't even know why I exist. Though, I could say that I feel like not existing right now. At any rate, I needed to say something. This is a princess, and princesses usually have dungeons of some sort at their disposal. I'd rather not get acquainted with them.
"Well, uh, as for the first thing you asked, I'm not entirely sure. I'm sorta just going by George right now. And as for the other question, well, I don't know that one either."
Her expression grew more concerned. "You mean to say you do not know why you are here?"
"Not really. I mean, in all honesty, this entire day has been confusing for me. You're a unicorn with wings, for god's sake. A completely different species from me. How am I even supposed to take that?"
"Human- or rather, George, I will not accept an attempt at dodging the question. You do know that humans are currently barred from entering Equestria, correct?" Okay, intimidation factor rising exponentially.
"W-Well, yeah, but I only found that out once that Twilight pony told me about it." Sweat pouring out of every orifice. This is not looking good. "I'm sorry, Princess, but I've really got no idea what the hell is going on. I just want to figure out why I fell out of the sky." I ended this with a hand gesture that just so happened to end with one of my fingers pointing at a window just to the left of Celestia. Now, that's just a hand gesture, right? Not too dangerous or anything. Thing is, when I did this, I inadvertently launched a ball of fire from my finger that narrowly missed Celestia and shattered said window.
...Wait, what the hell did I just write? A ball of fire? No, something's not right here. I can't do that, can I? I squinted through my cracked lens - yep - that window is gone.
My view drifted over to my index finger. There was a thin smoke trail emanating from it. In pure astonishment, I looked up just in time to witness a shocked expression on Celestia's face, coupled with a multitude of guards rushing at me seemingly out of nowhere.
This is an unfortunate predicament, isn't it?
Fortunately for me, It was at that point that I suddenly remembered something. I'm invincible, right? How else could I have survived that fall?
That was probably a huge conclusion to jump to, but I didn't really have the time to think about that. My mind being overloaded with pure, unbridled confidence, I put my hands at my hips and stood there, ready for anything...
And then I fell over backwards, wrapped in an amalgamation of various ropes and chains. I looked up just in time to see a green aura fade away from Celestia's horn, me now surrounded by a good few of her guards. Okay, maybe I was a bit overconfident. Maybe a lot.
"Alright, you make a good point! But I stand by my statement that I have no idea what is going on!" I probably wasn't helping my case here, but after the fireball, I feel like I was screwed anyway.
"George, you are going to be imprisoned for questioning. I advise you to come peacefully."
"Do I really have a choice?! The only part of me I can move is my mouth, for god's sake!"
She responded by adding a few more ropes that covered said mouth. What an absolutely lovely day.