Oh hi, Minty here... no it's not my story yet, but thought I'd speak up. You know, as bad of a klutz I am, and as much as this town's ponies like to avoid me, there are ponies that are even more disliked than I am around here. I had an experience with two of em recently, and It's something I really wish I could forget about. Because thanks to these two ponies, I ended up taking a really, really bad trip.
It was last Thursday, and I had gotten kicked of the Cotton Candy Cafe for knocking a table over and smashing all the teacups, when I saw this old beat up van, painted up in these wild splashes of color, with a peace sign on the van's door. There was smoke puffing out of the little smokestack on the back of the van, and sitar music was blaring out through the vehicle's loudspeakers.
"Hey, Minty, is that you? Far out!" A voice called out from the misty wall of smoke. "I thought I sensed your aura out here. Like, how's it going, mare?"
Now, every pony in town knows that this is a van that should be avoided at all costs, but I didn't see it in time to avoid it. It belongs to the weirdest pair of ponies to ever live in this town, and they've been known to cause if more disaster than I'm capable of causing.
"Oh, hi Port O' Bella." The greet the white mare with the mushroom cutie mark, as she steps out of the smoky haze. "Oh, I'm just heading home after hanging out with some friends, and I really need to get home to rearrange my sock drawer, and-"
"Wow, it's so totally rad to see you again!" She grabbed me by the hoof, and pulled me towards the door of the van. "You so totally need to stop by and commune with us for awhile!"
Oh dear, Bella is the last mare you want to commune with, or do anything else, for that matter. Actually she and I used to be best buds, and she helped keep me out of trouble back when we were younger. But one day I found a strange field of mushrooms outside of town, and Bella insisted on trying one first, to make sure it wouldn't hurt me. But those strange mushrooms changed her, and now my dear childhood friend is nothing but a burned out hippie pony!
"Like, your aura feels way too tense, girl!" Bella told me with a laugh, as she pulled me through the strings of beads hanging at the door, and inside the funkadelic van. "You totally need to peace out with us for a while, until you go all mellow!"
I was now in a confined space, with lot of wispy clouds, and shag carpeting covering every surface. A shiny disco ball was hanging from the ceiling, and reflecting what little bit of light was in the van. I coughed and gagged at all the stale air in there, and my head started to hurt from all the toxic fumes.
"Minty, it's so cool to see you again! Are your pure cosmic energies in tune with the universe?" A purple stallion with an ice cream cutie mark jumped up from the driver's seat, trotting over to greet me. "So good for you to join us while we harmonize our karma with all living things!"
Banana Split, oh dear... he was a colt I had a crush on when we were younger, he used to work at the ice cream parlor here in Ponyville. He used to serve me the sweetest green mint sundaes for free right before our dates, until that mushroom-huffing burnout turned him into a hippie. Ugh, I still can't believe I lost such a cute colt to a fallen former friend!
"Minty, girl. you look kind of stressed." Port o' Bella told me, shoving a mushroom into my mouth, and pushing my head back so I swallowed it. "Here, one of my magic shrooms will make you feel allll better!"
Ugh, these stupid magical mushrooms she grows in the van's window box- I can't believe she made me eat one! Some of these mushrooms can heal a sick pony I've heard... but I've also heard she grows some no-so-very nice mushrooms that do not-so-very nice things! I try to spit the fungus up after she stumbles away... but to no avail.
What, happened next.. is still kinda fuzzy in my mind. I remember lots of lights, sound, and colors. The van's floor gave way beneath us, and suddenly we were flying through the air, like we were Pegasai with no wings. The three of us soared over a pretty field of daffodils, and when I reached down with my hoof to touch them, they turned into a swarm of butterflies that flew away!
"That's it, embrace the warmth and love of the cosmic all!" Bella shouted flying next to me. "Let the positive energy of Aquarius flow through you, as we enter a new age of peace and happiness!"
I then saw Bella and Banana fly us far off into space, swimming through the endless sea of stars together as we flew hoof-in-hoof. Then all the stars changed into green birds, that flew away into a green sky! Then, the tree of us were all floating in a green boat on a green sea of lime punch, with green cracker goldfish swimming through it, while we sipped green mint tea from green cups. Ohhh, it was such a wonderful time, I almost wished it would never have ended!
I don't know how long it was before I stumbled out of that van, and trotted shakily down the street, wandering around town with swirly eyes, and muttering to myself. I woke up in Daisyjo's garden the next morning, talking to the daises about how pathetic my love life is. My head is still ringing from that whole mess, and I'm laying here on my bed with a cold compress on my forehead ever as I write this with my hooves! She got me so funked out with her weird mushrooms, I'm using big words I don't normally use, and I don't' even know what they mean!
A word to the wiser ponies in Ponyville; avoid this psychedelic mare at all costs. Who knows what kind of mushroom she'd give you to 'mellow out your aura'! Because if you're not careful around Miss Port O' Bella, she may send you on a trip that you'll never come back from!