//------------------------------// // Only Human (Epilogue) // Story: Aria and Sonata Have a Prank War // by Glitch Hooves //------------------------------// 5 Years Later... She poised herself in front of the mirror trying to get a view of herself on all angles. She wasn't too sure why, she was meeting family, not going to church. Her dress was formal but still casual. It was simple white dress that went down to her knees. It exposed her shoulders and hugged her skin, letting a perfect outline shine through. A red waistband wrapped her hips. To match the theme, she was also wearing her white and red hat with black feathers. The dress definitely looked good on her. Than again? What didn't? She heard the doorbell ring and she left her room. She passed by a small room that had a grand piano and a black-gold saxophone lying against the wall. She took a day off from work to spend this day getting ready and catching up. Going down the steps, she saw a head poking up from behind the stained glass at the top of the door. She couldn't help but recall the events leading here. Things had been rough after her twenty seventh. Her and her sisters had to live off sugar water for about a year or so before they were finally able to move out of Canterlot and gain a new footing in life. Although... she still couldn't wrap her head around the dirty glares they got on a regular basis. Standing in front of it, she reached for the handle and was greeted the most halfhearted, 'great to see you again,' of all time. She gave a genuine smile in return as she greeted her house-guest. "Good to see you again, Aria," she said warmly. She was wearing torn up jeans with a... less than common sweater wrapped her shoulders. It was a tiger pelt... the lower jaw was missing and the top jaw was hanging over her head like a hoodie, the sharp teeth covering up her forehead. The arms of the thing rested on her shoulder and leaned forward, almost looking they were hugging her. She was also dragging behind a one strap backpack that looked full. On the parts the pelt didn't cover up, she was wearing a sports bra. Just the sports bra. "Hey there big sister," she replied warmly. Her eyes darted down slightly and a small smirk grew on her lips. "Or should I say, 'little sister?'" Adagio replied to this with an annoyed look before looking behind Aria, almost as if expecting to see someone. "Where's Sonata? I thought you said she was driving you here from the airport?" she asked. "Turned out I gotta another ride, I gave her a call to let her know to come straight here," she gave a brief look of realization. "Wait? She's not here." Something caught Adagio's eye. "Oh, she's here alright," she said shaking her head with an amused smile. "What are you- oh my god..." Aria turned around to see what had her interest at the moment. They could see Sonata's little purple car parked in the driveway... on the other side of the street. Sonata herself was engaged in a conversation of the owner of the house right across from Adagio's home. The man appeared terrified for whatever reason, looking at this woman who had just randomly pulled up in his driveway and was now attempting to strike conversation with him. He must have though this was a strange new attempt at a robbery. With the way his body language spoke, he appeared to be trying to close the door without appearing rude, but would get cut off when Sonata found another reason to keep it open. Creepily enough, she seemed to be inching closer to him... "HEY! IDIOT! OVER HERE!" Aria called out, grabbing her attention. Sonata turned around and saw her two sisters on the other side. She smiled brightly before waving goodbye to the man who replied by sighing in relief before she made her way down the street. She was wearing a warm looking purple and yellow stripped sweater, and she was carrying a large food container with what looked like it had a home-cooked meal inside. "Hey there, little troublemaker," Adagio greeted. "'Little'?!" Aria exclaimed. "She's bigger than the both of us... combined!" "Is that a fat joke or a big boob joke?" Sonata asked, looking slightly offended. "Big boobs," Aria answered blatantly. "... I'll allow it," Sonata said with a happy smile, striking a pose. "Alright, stop flirting you two-" "Flirting?!" "Let's get inside before you catch a cold," Adagio finished, taking a step inside. "Ughh!" Aria groaned as she stepped in. "I thought it was kinda cute..." Sonata chimed. Aria stopped suddenly, half her body was still inside and the other out. She turned her head slowly and made a look that can only be described as perplexed. "I made it weird, didn't I...?" Sonata replied with a shy smile. "Yeah! You kinda did," Aria mocked before turning back and going inside. The house was warm, and the first thing you would see is a large, red couch. Several heart shaped pillows leaned against it. As well as a large black blanket which has no doubt seen a lot in its years of use if Adagio's life style was evidence enough. Adagio was sitting on the dining room table waiting for the other two to sit down. She was sitting on the end closest to the door and was waiting for the other two to take their seats. She wore a patient expression. Aria sat down and set her backpack on the floor just next to her feet. Sonata sat down beside Aria on the farthest end of the table, despite the large space in the dead center. Their lives had taken a more positive turn after their agreed upon separation. They thought it'd be best to move on. Adagio was now helping run a small jazz club with big business in this town, although she practically runs the thing by herself. She does help write the music though, she even contributes a little more by playing the piano on most nights. Lord knows she couldn't handle the mic even if her life depended on it. Sonata moved to a small little town called humansville, while there, she actually opened up a little restaurant, ironically named. 'The Little Restaurant,' look, those two may love their little sister, but she doesn't really have a way with names. She has an aquarium with an electric eel inside named, "Mr. Unagi," who she posts videos of his feedings every two days. Now Bom on the other hand... she held on to Bom for as long as he could before he passed away the year before. He spent his final two months sleeping most of the time in Sonata's arms. Moving on, Aria was a second in command so to speak. She ran a gym all the way over at manehatten with her boyfriend. Well... by day it's a gym, at night it turns into a full fledged arena, with bets on winners and everything! Adagio is still wondering whether it's legal or not. Needless to say, those two rule the underground. Sonata set down the container of food while Aria pulled up her backpack and gently set it down on the table. Key-word: gently. She unzipped it stating that she had a special surprise for everyone. Sonata was sitting relatively close, very exited over what kind of occasion would make her grouch of a sister bring gifts. Aria reached a hand inside and rummaged carefully. She grabbed something and pulled it out. It was a small purple mug with a topaz gemstone expertly painted on it. She slid it across the table towards Adagio. She looked at it strangely, examining the side presented to her. She gave a forced smile and turned to Aria. "You got me a mug... how, 'thoughtful,' of you," Adagio muttered apathetically Aria's brow furrowed as she sighed in annoyance. "Read the mug, numb-nuts," she said. Adagio complied and wrapped a hand around the mug and lifted it up to investigate the other side. On the other side of it were words written on it. She read them aloud. "Worlds greatest..." her eyes widened suddenly as she put a hand to her mouth. "...Aunt?" her eyes glued to those words for a good ten seconds before she looks back up. "Holy god! When?!" she asked, her voice rising in pitch up very quickly. "Found out last month," Aria replied with a warm expression. She reached inside her backpack and gave Sonata a mug as well. It had a dark pink heart on it and on the other side was an amethyst gem. But instead of 'greatest aunt,' the words were written as 'worst aunt.' "Wait, I don't get it...?" Sonata said, one eyebrow raised. "Sonata, Aria's-" "Hold up!" Aria interrupted. "I wanna see how long it is before she figures it out." Sonata stared into the distance, seemingly trying to put the pieces together. ... "Oooooohhhhhhh!" she said, smiling slightly and nodding. ... No reac- "OH MY GOD!" She suddenly burst upwards and nearly tackled Aria out of her chair. She wrapped her arms around her and they actually wrapped around the chair she was sitting on as well. "Alright, alright," Aria protested, trying push her off. She was stronger in every way, yet she somehow couldn't push Sonata off herself. "You can let..." Adagio just came up beside her and now her arms were wrapped around her and Sonata. ... "Could I get some personal space!" Aria barked suddenly. The two didn't flinch but they did comply and let her go. Once they took their seats again, Aria could do nothing to stop the influx of, 'congratulations,' and, 'when is it's?' She would say she spent around thirty minutes answering their questions and she just felt exhausted after all that. "So!" she said. "Could we please just get this night started?" she asked. Being entirely truthful... she was hoping that would have went better. After regaining her bearings, Adagio got up and walked to the sofa in the living room. Sonata got up as well, but still had enough time to give Aria a celebratory smile. Aria was mumbling beneath her breath when she got there. She took a seat next to the black blanket and realized just how cold the room was. She tore down the blanket and wrapped it around herself. "So what're we watching, cougar?" she asked, finding a suitable position laying on her side. Adagio was rummaging through a cupboard where she held an assortment of things, mostly just dusty old books, but sometimes a mysterious movie would appear there that she lost during spring cleaning. "We are watching..." she pulled a disc out. "Return of The Attack of The Zombie Mutants From Hell and Outer Space..." her voice trailed off as she read the extensive title. "When the hell did I get this?" "Sounds like my kind of movie!" Aria said. Below the television was a DVD player. Placing it in, Adagio went back to the couch and grabbed the remote. She pressed play. The pre-movie commercials began, allowing for ample time to start up a riveting conversation. ... "So..." Adagio began awkwardly. Then, inspiration struck. "Sonata?" "Hmm?" she hummed, turning her head to face her. "Have you been seeing anyone?" she asked with a smirk. Sonata put on a contemplative look. "Uh, not really, no," she answered plainly. Aria suddenly bolted upright, staring at Sonata with the most bewildered expression. "I refuse to believe that!" she exclaimed. "Sonata, you're twenty-six years old now, and you're telling us not ONE guy tried to hit on you?" She just shrugged her shoulders. "I guess no ones interested in me," she said sadly. "Give me your phone," Aria demanded. "What?! Why?!" "Just give it to me, I wanna see something," Aria replied. "What?" "You gonna ask questions or are you gonna give me your phone?" Sonata reached into her sweater pocket. "Okay?" she pulled out a little pink phone and handed it to Aria skeptically. Aria immediately went to her phone list. Her hand trembled at the sight. "NINETY-SEVEN CONTACTS!!!" She shrieked. "What!?" Adagio suddenly sat upright, her eyes expanding to near supernova levels. "Your lying; let me see," Adagio dared, holding her hand out. Aria tossed the phone into the air, much to Sonata's dismay, as Adagio snatched it before it could land on the soft couch. Looking at the the screen, Adagio's eyes widened nearly twice as much as before. "Freaking hell, Sonata! You've been busy!" she exclaimed, scrolling down the list, only recognizing two names in the whole list. 'Aria,' and, 'Adagio.' "What'd I do?" she asked, still confused as to the whole situation. "Sonata?" Aria began. "Out of that whole list; how many of em' are dudes?" "Well there not ALL guys, some girls even give me their phone numbers... but they never call for some reason...?" she stared off quietly. Aria just stared at her while Adagio was bellowing with laughter. "I'm so proud!" Adagio said, finding some breath. "Proud? This is just sad," Aria counted. "My little sister's a real player!" she let lout before continuing her hysteria. "Wait, I'm confused?" Sonata chipped in. "What's going on?" "Sonata, do you really think all those guys and women were just being really nice to you for no reason?" Aria asked. "Kinda..." Sonata said sheepishly. "They were flirting with you!" "Ohhhhh!" her pondering expression returned again. "Wait, so why don't they call me again?" "That's not how flirting works! You're supposed to call them next!" "What? Why?" Sonata asked. "I don't know why! It's the rules of nature or something," Aria answered. "Okay...?" Sonata said skeptically. "Alright, look, here's the deal," Aria began. "You and me are gonna look through ever single one of these people, and your gonna try and remember as much as you can about them, can you do that?" "Yup!" "Alright, once we do that, I'm gonna pick out a suitable mate for you, okay?" "Kay?" "You'll call them and meet them for dinner." "Alright?" "And you let me and Dagi know if anything naughty happens, we'll take of it, you got that?" "Okay!" #### A good bit of time was spent on their next task. Aria would pull out a random number and Sonata would her best to remember that person in all details she could fathom. Adagio joined in when Sonata mentioned a man named, 'Apex Beat,' in a very good light. Once it was set and done, Sonata agreed to call someone, guy or gal, she couldn't remember, who went by, 'Vanishing Point.' After that, they finally started movie. ... "Hey, Dagi? How have things been going at the cafe?" Aria asked. "It's not a cafe," Adagio replied. "It's called the Madman's Cafe..." Aria retorted. "It's a jazz club," Adagio said sternly. "It's called the Madman's Cafe." "It's open at night!" "It's called the Madman's Cafe!" "THE NAME IS SUPPOSED TO BE IRONIC!" "THAT DOESN'T CHANGE THE CONTEXT!" "Ughh! Anyway, what did you want to know anyway?" Adagio asked in a disgruntled tone. "Anything new happen?" Aria asked. "Well, since you so graciously asked! If it weren't for me constantly pushing on the topic, we wouldn't have gotten someone to finally fill in our missing cello role," she answered. "Well that's good, you know em'?" Aria asked again. "Not yet," a predatory smile curled on her lips, "but I do intent too..." she let her words hang in the air like a bad omen. "Oh god! How old is she?" Aria asked in a mocking disgusted tone. "She's legal, she's actually attending a university not too far from here, if I remember correctly, she's majoring in Music Theory," that dark smile came again. "Best part is she looks fresh outta high school..." Aria threw her arms into the air. "Do you have, like, any problem with the fact your a freaking cougar?" "None. At. All" "ugh... moving on!" "You know, as a joke I actually started to call her, 'raw meat,' and the funniest part is she thinks its some sort of initiation!" she started to cackle. "I said I'm moving on!" Aria exclaimed. "You wanted to know so badly!" Adagio retorted. "She constantly has this, 'High and Mighty,' front she puts on, but I can see right through it. And you wanna know what I see?" "You're gonna tell me whether I say yes or no, aren't you?" Aria asked with no emotion. "You know me so well, Aria.' "Hey, Sonata?" Aria called. "Hmm?" Sonata hummed, turning away from the television. "Wanna go hang ourselves in the hallway?" "Was that sarcasm?" she asked. "yes," Aria said exasperatedly. "Yay! Wait? Was that sarcasm?" "No," Aria answered. "... Was that sarcasm?" "Oh my god!" "Oh shush, will you?" Adagio asked, chuckling slightly. "As I was saying-" "I'm gonna kill someone!" Aria muttered. "Was that-" "WILL YOU SHUT UP!!" Sonata flinched back, hers eyes widening in response. She suddenly got up and walked off. She didn't say anything, just walked to the bathroom next to the kitchen. "Nata, I'm sorry!" Aria called. Attempting to get up. She stopped her attempt when she heard the door. "Ugh... goddammit..." "I swear, that girl has the bladder of a puppy," said Adagio. "You're not at all bothered by the fact I just scared off my little sister?" Aria said. "Why should I? You gotta pretty good reason for being like that," Adagio explained. "And what would that be?" "It's right inside you." "Oh... yeah..." They could hear a small tinkling noise coming from the bathroom now. "You think she's ever gonna get laid?" Adagio asked suddenly. "I thought we both agreed she was asexual," Aria quipped. "Well she's gotta reproduce somehow," Adagio replied Aria put a hand on her chin. "I was always a big fan of mitosis." Adagio chuckled. "And how does that work." "I feel like one day she's gonna eat so much food that she kinda just splits into two Sonatas," Aria explained. "That'd be hell on earth," Adagio remarked. "Well, what do you say?" "I say she's the larval form of her species and one day she'll spin a cocoon and emerge two weeks later with an exo-skeleton and moth wings..." "Well... thanks for the nightmares..." Aria retorted. A smile brewed on her face. "Hey, maybe that's what she's doing right now." "Not in my bathroom, she ain't!" The door opened and Sonata walked back in looking slightly better. "Look, Nata, I'm sorry for snapping like that," Aria said. "It's okay," Sonata replied. "It's... okay?" Aria said skeptically. "Yeah," Sonata replied once more, taking a seat on the couch. "You're not mad?" "No, you just scared me a little, you didn't mean it, did you?" "Wha-no! of course not!" "Well, then I'm okay," Sonata finished. "Well glad that smoothed over," Adagio chimed. Aria just decided to drop the situation and- "I see in her eyes an inner beast, one that wants to let loose and ravage in bed," Adagio said without warning. "GOD #$%*!&/! dammit!!" #### "Ari?" "Yeah, Sonata?" "I'm cold," Sonata complained. "So what?" Aria asked, growing impatient. "Can I have your blanket?" she asked timidly. "Wha-? No!" Aria exclaimed. "Please?" "I'm the one carrying! I say I get to keep it!" ... "...Can we share it?" "Wha-!" "Please?" "I don't... fine! Whatever!" Aria groused. She lifted her arm up, allowing for a small place for a small person to fit in. Sonata got up. "Thank you," she said, sliding into the gap. "Yeah, whatever..." Aria grimaced. She closed the blanket and moved her head slightly to let Sonata her pillow. Adagio let out an amused chuckle. "And what are you laughing at, miss 'I can't get a steady relationship, so I compensate by dating barely legal kids'?" Aria fussed. Adagio smiled and shook her head. "You two would have made an adorable couple," she turned her head back to the TV "You shut your mouth!" Aria growled. She glared at Adagio for another minute or so before slowly turning her attention back to the television. #### "Alright, I say it's time to hit the hay," Adagio announced, turning off the TV as the movie's end credits began to play. "Wait! We didn't see if there are any after-credits!" Sonata pleaded suddenly, refusing to leave her warm spot on the couch. "Sonata, there is no way a movie like this has after-credits," Adagio protested. "But what if there is? Then we might miss something important," she replied. "I sincerely doubt a movie with a title like, 'Return of The Attack of The Zombie Mutants From Hell and Outer Space,' would have after-credits," Adagio replied listlessly. "Oh come on, Dagi!" Sonata whined. Adagio shook her head and switched the TV back on. Ten minutes of credits and nothing... "Whelp, that was good ten minutes of my life I'll never get back..." Aria said, shaking her head. "Alright, Sonata, we stayed and watched your little after-credits bull-hunkey. Now can we get some sleep?" Adagio asked, slightly ticked. Sonata was slowly getting up now from her spot, letting out a soft yawn. "Okay, Dagi." "Great, the guest bedroom is where it's always been," Adagio said. "Did you get the new beds?" Aria asked, getting up and removing her tiger pelt. She cut her hair short, so now it barely went past her ears. "I keep telling you, I'm not buying TWO beds for two guests who come over once a year! And besides, what's wrong with sharing a bed with Sonata?" "Cause this little gremlin keeps latching on to me when she sleeps!" Aria protested. "I swear she's like a parasite!" "I feel more comfortable when someone sleeps next to me..." Sonata said. "See? She feels safer next to you! Now go upstairs already," Adagio mumbled, heading to the kitchen. "Where are you going?" Aria asked, an angered face plastered. "I need to clean up the table!" Adagio called from the kitchen. Adagio could hear a groan coming from Aria and two sets of feet going up the steps leading to the guest rooms. She scratched her nose real quick and grabbed the glass containers with Sonata's home brought meals. She opened the fridge and found space for them on the bottom shelf. Closing the fridge, she turned back to the table and groaned when she saw the mess of plates and cups. Grabbing a few, she set some plates down in the sink and turned back to the table. The rest of the plates continued to mock her. "Ehh, I'll get to it tomorrow..." she said, walking back into the living room She heard something... just slightly outside her door. It sounded like something was rustling against the stone gravel outside. She turned slowly towards it as the sound continued to grow louder. They were heading for the door... Something in her, she wasn't too sure what, told her to get closer. She took a slow and deliberate step towards the door. It was all the way across the room and she was approaching very slowly, listening for any changed in the unknown trespasser's pace. It continued the same, and she quickened in response. She had a hand just inches over the door knob. With sudden speed, she grabbed and twisted the doorknob, pushing open the door nearly instantly. The door smacked against something and she could hear a feminine sounding grunt. She saw a darkly clad figure fall backwards, something dropping from their hands. They got up quickly and stared at Adagio. Their face was covered in a dark hood and all she could see was cyan colored eyes. Adagio began yelling. "GET OUT!!" she bellowed. "I'M CALLING THE POLICE! GET OUT!" she looked around and found a potted plant by the doorway. She quickly picked it up and arched it to toss. The figure was already halfway down the street. Panting heavily, she watched as the imminent threat was growing smaller as it ran off into the distance. She looked down and saw what exactly they dropped. It was an envelope. Looking back, she could see the figure disappearing into the darkness. She looked back down onto the letter and crouched. She wrapped it around her fingers softly and picked it up. She examined it front to back and found writing that said, 'Please Read Me.' Walking back in, she made extra care to assure herself that the door was locked. She looked back down on the envelope. She was debating whether or not to throw it away. Curiosity got the better of her when she opened the thing. It was a neatly folded piece of paper. Unfolding it, Adagio raised a brow when she read the contents. It was, 'I'm Sorry,' written seven times in different colored pencils and penmanship. She stared at it for a good while, unsure of what to make of this. She turned it around. There was an actual message on the back of it. 'Dear Adagio Dazzle.' How did that woman know her name? 'We want to tell you how sorry we are about what happened. We don't know whether you really don't remember us or if your trying not too, but please, let's talk with you. Please meet us at-' "ADAGIO!!" a panicked voice called going down the steps. Adagio looked up suddenly and saw Sonata and Aria standing by the steps, looking at her with panic and worry. "Are you alright?!" Aria asked, she was shifting her weight from one foot to the other, as if ready to fight.. "We heard screaming and wanted to make sure you were safe," Sonata said, talking a step towards her. Adagio looked at them and back at the letter. She looked back up before walking towards the kitchen. "I'm fine, girls," she assured. "It was just... it was just some crazy woman," she said as she tossed the note into the trash bin. "Come on, it's been a long night, let's get some sleep,' she suggested. She was the first to go up the steps as Aria and Sonata exchanged worried glances. #### The two got into the queen sized bed together, Sonata was already wrapping an arm around Aria as she groaned in protest. Aria closed her eyes, knowing how difficult finding sleep will be when she has a little sister constricting her lungs. She found herself surprised when Sonata actually let go of her. She rested a bit more comfortably now. "Ari?" Sonata asked after about five minutes. 'Oh, dear lord, why?' "What, Sonata?" Aria asked, trying her darn hardest to muster her, 'Don't bother me,' tone. "When did Adagio post this?" she asked, Aria could see the faint glow of phone. "When did she post what?" "This," Sonata said as she pulled up her phone so that Aria could get a clear look at it. It showed Aria and Sonata, the both of them lying down together. On Adagio's couch... Underneath a black blanket... Sharing the same heart-shaped pillow. Aria could hear her teeth grinding against each other. Underneath the picture was a large caption in a romantic font that read. 'TRUE LOVE,' "Oh, she is a dead woman!" Aria growled quietly. "What now?" Sonata asked. "You, me, tomorrow morning, we're getting her back!" Aria said deviously. "We're gonna teach sister dearest a lesson.."