The air of the dressing room was humid and smelled of sweat. Several multicolored mares were already there, chatting as they took off their armor and got ready to hit the showers. With the last turn of the night watch over, they were anxious to return home to get some much needed sleep.
Noose stood on the doorway, nervously glancing each pony. She knew their names. She knew their tastes and dislikes. She knew so much about them from furtively listening to their conversations. But she never talked to them. Ever.
The batpony’s ears flicked under her hood. Glinting Steel was telling Luminaria about a date she had with a stallion named Rusty. Apparently, everything had gone smoothly, and she would seem him again this weekend. Noose smiled slightly, her two fangs protruding between her lips.
“Uh, excuse me?” spoke a voice behind the mare, who let out a yelp and jumped out of the way. She mentally chided herself for standing exactly on the worst possible place. The bulky mare that was trying to cross the door frowned at the exaggerated reaction from Noose. “Er…thank you.” she said, giving the mare an odd look as she walked past her.
Noose looked up from underneath her hood. Meteor Hammer. She was the latest addition to the night watch, after Troubleshooter had to retire. Used to work during the day watch.
Noose silently walked to the farthest corner of the dressing room, which wasn’t very far at all from the rest of the mares. But the glowstone there was always drained of magic and produced near to no light, which gave her a bit more of privacy.
The batpony glanced back. The other dozen mares were all talking to each other or busy in some other way. Good. Nopony would pay attention to her.
With a small sigh, Noose proceeded to take off her cloak. Underneath was the polished armor of the Ground Guard. Made of common steel and linen, it offered less protection than the Royal Guard’s, but it was much lighter and more comfortable. Perfect for her peacekeeper duty. In the center of the chestplate gleamed a pink gemstone, which matched her eyes and signaled her as the owner of that particular suit of armor.
Noose took a moment to touch the six-sided gem with her hoof. She could see her reflection on its surface, but tinted pink. Her midnight purple coat. Her sharp factions, softened by the soft fluff on her jaw, also present on her chest and elbows. Her slit pupils, shared with her brothers. And then, her eyes and her mane. A bless and a curse at the same time. Her mane and tail were a nice soft shade of pink which looked fantastic against her dark coat. And to complete it, her striking bright pink eyes. She had been gifted a very nice combination of colors, unlike her brothers. One had a rather dull palette, while the other looked incredibly freaky with his blood-red eyes.
But it also had some problems. Namely, it was very eye-catching, and gave her more attention than she wished for.
“Oh damn!” came the voice of Meteor Hammer over the rest of the chatter. Noose looked up and saw the burnt brown mare walking in her direction. Her heart sped up, her hooves fidgeting to open the belts that held her armor together.
Hammer sat on the bench next to her, causing it to creak. “I think it’s the first time I see you without your cloak!” she said, grinning. “You have really nice mane. I am so envious!” She said, idly rubbing her brown patch of mane.
‘Say something, or she will get angry.’
“I-I…thank you,” stammered Noose, finally freeing her breastplate.
“Why do you even hide it? You’re always wearing this sort of wrapping around your tail,” continued Hammer, unaware of Noose’s distress. “Maybe you don’t like its color? Listen girl, I have the most damn boring colors you could ever find.” Noose took off her flank armor and continued with the linen suit. Cold sweat pearled her forehead as one of the belts just refused to open. “So if I were you, I would show the Tartarus out of it. It wouldn’t change the style, though. You look just fine with your mane short.”
Desperate with the stubborn belt, Noose slid a hoof under it and pulled downwards, peeling the suit off her body. “Will do, t-thanks-bye.” she stammered under her breath as she hurriedly picked up all the parts of her armor and stormed through the door.
Silence reigned in the dressing room, all eyes fixed in the exit.
“…is she always like that?” asked a very dumbfolded Meteor Hammer.
“Yeah,” replied Luminaria from the other side of the room. “You’ll get used to it. She’s very shy.” There was a chorus of agreements.
She had forgotten her cloak.
She had forgotten her damn cloak. She hadn’t noticed until she was in the street. Her brothers weren’t there yet, so she had considered going back to retrieve it, but she quickly discarded the idea. She simply couldn’t.
When her brothers arrived, they didn’t say anything about the missing piece of clothing. But when they started walking back home, the two elder siblings stood separate enough to let Noose walk between them, shielding her from the eyes of everypony. And she appreciated it.
Despite this, she still felt exposed. She flinched when one stallion stopped on his tracks and stared her as they walked past him. Noose’s ears fell flat on her skull and she ducked further between her brothers.
The mare looked up. She could fly and get home much faster. But today the sky was completely clear, completely devoid of clouds, with a few pegasus hovering here and there. There was no cover, nowhere to hide. Everypony would be able to see her.
It wasn’t an option.
Twenty minutes later, the small group arrived at their home. It was a small house, near the edge of Canterlot, but located in a short, gloomy street with no direct view of the end of the city.
Noose made an immediate beeline for the sofa, where she dropped like a sack of potatoes, burying her face into the cushions. Everything was fine now. She was safe. The mare’s ear flicked at the sound of hoofsteps against the carpet. She could tell those heavy and slow movements belonged to Gallow, the middle brother.
Gallow placed something on the table and then sat on his armchair with a low grunt. Noose looked up and saw a plate of crackers and a bottle of soda. His brother was holding a similar one. Noose muttered a faint ‘Thank you’ and took a cracker.
The stallion studied his sister for a second, then opened the bottle with a bite. “So,” he started, placing the discarded cap on the table. “what happened?”
He didn’t sound angry nor amused. He sounded uninterested. Her brother always sounded uninterested. But his low voice had switched tone just enough to tell Noose that he cared about her. The mare let out a sigh and took a sip of her own bottle before telling him all what had happened in the dressing room. Gallow listened with attention, never interrupting his little sister. Only when she was done, the large stallion let out a heavy sigh.
“You’re going to have to learn to deal with that sooner or later,” he rumbled, taking a sip of his drink.
“That’s easy to say for you,” replied Noose. She took one of the crackers, tossed it upwards, and caught it in her mouth. “But I just can’t do it.”
His left eyebrow raised. “You can’t talk to ponies?”
“Exactly.”
“You’re talking to me right now.”
“Yeah, but that is different,” remarked Noose with a sigh, making it clear they had had this conversation before, and she was tired of it. “You’re my brother and I’ve always known you, and you care about me and stuff…”
“What about Armor Polish?” he insisted.
“She’s also different,” muttered Noose, rubbing her eyes with a hoof. “I met her while I was hunting, you know that.”
“Yes, I know,” agreed Gallow, rhythmically tapping the bottle with a hoof. Noose ate another cracker and buried her face in the sofa again. That had always been her favorite place to sleep. Her bed was mostly used for…other things, more private. She heard her brother chucking the rest of the bottle and getting up from the armchair. “You know that not everypony wants to hurt you, right? Most honestly want to meet you and know more about you.” A pink-maned head nodded. “Good. Just making sure. Are you planning to go hunting tomorrow?”
Another nod. “Y’ wnn com?” came the muffled question from Noose.
“No,” replied Gallow with mild annoyance. “You know I don’t like that kind of places.” A muffled giggle. The stallion shook his head and smiled slightly. “Love you, sis.”
“I wuw y’ too”
Noose heard Gallow trot off to his room. She sank her face further in the cushions. She should get to her bed, but she was way too comfortable on the sofa. She curled up a bit, trying to gather up courage and will to get up and climb the stairs, but it was to no avail. It was-
Something soft and warm landed on her, covering her entire body. Noose looked up and caught a glimpse of the tail of her brother, disappearing through the door. The mare curled up in her blanked and smiled, content.
Noose’s ear flicked.
She was now awake, but in this state of limbo where she was still mostly asleep, and would take some important stimulus to wake her up completely.
A Celestia-forsaken fly would probably do the job just fine.
Noose’s ear flicked yet again.
The mare let out an annoyed moan. She wanted to sleep a bit more, but the damn bug had for some reason decided her ear was the perfect place to land. Couldn’t it go bother someone else? Like her older brother, for example?
Noose’s ear flicked for the third time.
She was determined to stay asleep. She would win this battle. She would wait until the fly landed on her ear again to end its miserable existence once and for all. And then, she would sleep in peace.
A tickle on the edge of her ear. The mare resisted the urge to shake it off. Sticking her tongue and furrowing her brow, Noose very slowly raised her extended foreleg. Right. The fly hadn’t moved. The poor thing had no idea what was coming. On the count of three.
One.
Two..
Three…
-SPLAT-
“YES!”
Something cold and sticky had been splattered onto her face by her own hoof. However, she didn’t move. She didn’t flinch. She would let Scaffold enjoy his victory while he could.
“HAAHAAHAAHAAHAA!” came the high-pitched voice of the older brother. “Oooh, that was frekkin’ priceless! You had no idea what was coming!” Noose smiled despite herself. Thankfully, he couldn’t see his expression. “Don’t worry, this time it’s just whipped cream! You’ll get it off your fur just fine! But sis, you should have learned not to sleep like that by now.”
Another fit of maniacal laughter. Scaffold had the freakiest laugh, which combined perfectly with his appearance and personality. He looked and often acted like the absolute creep he was. But most ponies didn’t know he was generally very fun to have around, and a shameless prankster. The only reason he had stopped dipping Noose’s hoof in water while she slept was because he also used that sofa.
“Aah, oh man. That was awesome,” Scaffold’s laughter slowly died and Noose heard him get on all four. “Hey Noose, you’re not angry, are you?” Pause. “Noose? Hey, Noose! Hey, don’t you ignore me.” The mare felt him poking her side with a hoof.
That was the pull of the trigger.
Noose pounced on her brother and pinned him against the table. Taken by surprise, he didn’t fight back. Grinning, the mare leaned forward and rubbed her face on his head, neck and chest, while he hopelessly squirmed and sputtered for help. Not satisfied with staining him with whipped cream, Noose smiled impishly and sat atop of his chest, leaning into his muzzle.
“Open your mouth,” whispered Noose. Scaffold didn’t move, just stared at her in bewilderment with his crimson eyes. The mare licked her lips and started to gather saliva. “Ghhhjjjjj!” A thick string of dense spit descended from her mouth, hanging directly over Scaffold’s. The stallion’s eyes went wide and he attempted to free his hooves, but he was still pinned and she was stronger.
“No! No! NONONONONO! Don’t you do it, don’t you freaking dare!” screeched the stallion, eyes fixed on the spit. “Gallow! Gallow, help me! Aagh! No! That’s gross, even for your standards! Gallow!”
The middle brother appeared on the threshold. He stared at the scene before him for a second, crooked an eyebrow, then turned around and left.
“Oh my goodness Gallow, I will murder you! HELP ME!!” screamed Scaffold at the door.
“Don’t drag me into your nonsense,” called out Gallow.
“GALLOOOOW!” screeched Scaffold. His face was now flat on the table, so he could only see the spit it with a single eye. With no perception of depth, he couldn’t know how far it was. But it was growing larger with each passing second. He could only watch helplessly, as every struggle made the string tremble, threatening to fall. “Nooooose, don’t you do it!”
Noose rolled her eyes and retracted the spit, giving Scaffold a gentle slap on the face before getting off him. “You are gross…” he muttered. “And you wanted me to eat it?!”
The mare grinned. “It wouldn’t have been the worst thing you’ve ever swallowed.”
Scaffold looked up and grinned with this mouth full of fangs. “Says the pan to the cup.”
“That’s not how the saying goes!” called out Noose, trotting to the kitchen as she shook her head in amusement.
Gallow was already there, cooking. He always did the cooking. Both Noose and Scaffold lacked the patience required to make anything above ‘edible’. The smell of fried fish watered Noose’s mouth. She took a napkin and tried to clean off most of the whipped cream. “Good noon,” she said, peeking over her brother’s shoulder. “Mmmmmh, salmon. My favorite.”
“Good noon,” replied the stallion without looking back. “I fancy myself some eggs, too. Would you like one?”
“You always fancy eggs, Gallow,” chucked the mare.
Gallow turned his head and crooked an eyebrow. “Is that supposed to be an innuendo? Because it makes no sense.”
Noose huffed and rolled her eyes, but grinned. “Not everything I say about you is an innuendo, bro. And yes, I’d like an egg.”
“No,” agreed Gallow with a chuckle. “That would be Scaffold. Mind setting up the table? I’m almost done.”
“Aye-aye, commander!”
With the food cooked and the table set, the two siblings started to eat, aware that Scaffold would turn in at some point. Gallow was the first to break the silence. “So, it’s Saturday. What are your plans for tonight?”
“Oh, the same as usual,” replied Noose, eagerly devouring the egg. “Get clean, go fetch Armor Polish, and go hunting.”
“Sounds good,” muttered the large stallion. “Would you like us to give you space?”
“Nah,” Noose shrugged. “I don’t think it will turn out into anything special, don’t worry.”
“Alright,” said Gallow, nodding slightly. “I’ll still go to bed early, for good measure.”
Summoned by the smell of food, Scaffold appeared trotting through the door, still with small remains of whipped cream on his chin and cheek. “Oh boy! Fried salmon!” he cheered. “Thanks, bro!”
A good bath, a thoughtful brushing of her mane and tail, and a single accessory, and she was ready to go. Noose took a quick glance to her reflection on the mirror, nodded and trotted off.
She met Armor Polish at her place. The golden mare was already waiting for her by the door, and grinned when she saw Noose descending upon her from the dark sky. The two ponies knocked their hooves together and started walking. “So, how is it going?” asked Armor.
“Pretty well,” replied Noose, the incident in the dressing room earlier today completely forgotten. “You?”
“Same. ‘s all good. Did you have anything special in mind for tonight?” drawled the other pony.
“Honestly, I want to go to one of our usual places,” replied Noose. “I don’t really want to walk, and I’d rather not spend money on a cart. We’re ending this month, after all.”
“Yeah, I get’cha. So, that means we’re going to the Bucking Mare, huh?” Noose nodded. “Sounds good. And hey, for once you won’t have to explain to the bouncer why yer wearing that ugly thing.”
“Hey!” replied the batpony, feigning aggravation and giving a tug to the noose loosely tied around her neck. “It’s like a necklace.” Noose made a pause and her smile turned impish. “And besides, you never know when you may need a rope after hunting…”
Armor shook her head but grinned. “I like how you think, babe.”
The two ponies chatted a bit for the few minutes it took the pair to arrive to the bar. The bouncer smiled at them and even high-oned Polish. “That was weird,” commented Noose once they had crossed the doors.
“Yeah, it was,” said Armor, looking at the door. She caught a glimpse of the hulking stallion looking at her, which caused her to frown.
“I think he likes you.”
“Yeah, well…” huffed Armor. “He better sit down, because he’s going to be waiting for veeeery long…”
The bar smelled like sweat, like the dressing room. But this was different. Mixed with it was the scent of alcohol, smoke, excitement and loose tempers. Here, she was in control. Here, she felt at home and could do what she pleased.
Noose scanned the bar with her slitted eyes. There were plenty of stallions to choose from, but her attention was quickly caught by the red-maned pony sitting behind the mixtable. But he would probably be busy all night, so the mare decided he would be a good second option.
As she glanced over the crowd once more, she noticed Armor Polish had already made a decision. Following her eyes, she saw a mint unicorn with golden eyes who was chatting with a tan earth pony.
“Nice choice,” commented Noose with a hint of mockery. “But I think she may be taken. She’s leaning way too close to that other mare.”
“I know,” purred Armor. “But you know I always like to squeak in.” The golden mare trotted towards the bar, and Noose followed her with an amused eyeroll. They ordered two root beers and sat where they could watch the two ponies without disturbance.
“They are both cute, but I like the unicorn the most,” muttered Armor with an impish smile. Then she looked back at her friend. “You seen anything good?”
Noose nodded and pointed to the dance floor. There, a pale brown pegasus stallion unsuccessfully attempted to impress a mare with his moves. Armor frowned. “For real? He is going to be desperate, Noose. I think you can aim a bit higher.”
“And I think you should aim a bit lower,” replied Noose, sticking her tongue.
Armor narrowed her eyes. “Are you saying I can’t get those two in my bed at the same time?”
“Yep!”
“Oh, it is so on!” grinned Polish, giving her friend a punch in the shoulder. “Wanna bet?”
“Sure,” said Noose, shrugging nonchalantly. “Who wouldn’t want to bet over certainty?”
“Alright…if I can hook up with those two at the same time,” Not turning around, Armor pointed a hoof to the two mares. Noose grinned when she saw the mint unicorn nibbling the other’s ear. “You will…uh…sleep with me.”
Noose rolled her eyes. “Armor-”
“No, hear me out,” interrupted the other mare, raising a hoof. “I mean sleeping. No more than spooning, if we even get to that. How’s that?”
The batpony raised an eyebrow. “Armor, you are going to have to offer me something really good to accept that. Not because I despise the idea of cuddling with you for a night, I don’t mind that much; but because if I do, you’ll try to make your moves on me. And I think I’ve stated many times already that I am straight. So I really don’t know what you could offer that may-”
“A six-month supply of pineapples.”
“…pineapples?” whispered Noose, her eyes wide open and her jaw hanging open. “Y-you mean it?” Armor nodded. “That’s…that’s a lot of money, you know? You could buy yourself a lot of things with that money.”
Armor Polish nodded again. “That’s how certain I am, babe.” She extended a hoof and grinned. “Do we have a deal?”
Noose stared at the hoof. If she lost, she would never hear the end of it from Armor Polish, who would try to hit on her every single day for the rest of their lives. That could also lead to awkward situation at the barracks, as Armor was a shameless flirt and being there wouldn’t stop her. That alone made her hesitate.
Oh the other hoof, pineapples. Sweet, slightly acid, juicy, pineapples.
Noose extended her hoof…and missed, as Armor had retracted it. “Wait, we forgot to give you a condition.”
The batpony glared at her friend. “What condition?”
“Well, I can’t be the only one working here, can I?” grinned Armor. “You’ve got to earn your pineapples, else what fun is there? You have to earn something if you actually want to enjoy it, right?”” Noose was about to point out a large supply of her favorite fruit would be enjoyed even if she had to commit treason to get it, but Armor was on a roll. “So, how about you try to hook up with both Mr Desperate there and the DJ, and then you’ll get your pineapples? I’ll be generous: You can do one and then the other one, but they have to be hunted down tonight.”
“The DJ?” hissed Noose. “How am I supposed to do that? He is going to be busy, there is no way I can flirt with him! And we don’t even know if he is straight! If any of them are straight!”
“What’s harder? Doing that, or starting a threesome with a couple?”
“I….hum!” Noose pouted and crossed her forelegs across her chest. Her eyes quickly moved to each of the targets. The pegasus seemed to be utterly lost at the dance floor. He’d be easy. The DJ was still behind the mixtable, grinning and clearly having a blast. Convincing him to leave early would be tricky, to say the least. And lastly, the mint mare was busy giving her fillyfriend a peck on the lips. Any doubt she could have had about them dissipated like smoke in the wind. So it all came down to if they would accept to have a menage-á-trois with Armor Polish.
The offering hoof was there again, expecting.
‘Pineapples…’
With a heavy sigh, Noose bumped her friend’s hoof; praying so that the DJ was, in fact, straight.
“This is going to be one Tartarus of a night…” grumbled Noose, taking a sip of her beer.
“You bet!”