Chapter 11: Don’t Sweet It
The room was silent, save for the gentle ticking of the antique clock positioned above the door. Twilight found herself glancing at the clock nervously every now and then, wondering what it would be like to meet a Celestia… that was not Celestia.
Nearby, Luna sat regally, her back straight and her posture stiff. It seemed like she was trying to make a good impression, but Twilight couldn’t tell. Luna’s expression could have been made of stone. She caught herself wistfully admiring the way the Luna held herself. Though she had been less than graceful around her subjects the last time she had visited Ponyville, Twilight had to remind herself that Luna was an experienced leader.
Luna was a princess that had strength and character to hold her own without so much as a twitch. She was firm and measured when need be, but she also sincerely desired the goodwill of her subjects, even to the point of ridicule. Change was hard, but Luna had this inner strength to her approach. She was tortured, brooding and misunderstood, and still she weathered it all. That was the part that Twilight couldn’t help but envy. She wondered if she could ever match that kind of composure, ever be able to handle that inevitable responsibility that weighed the soul and mind. In that way, Luna was similar to her sister, it seemed like nothing truly fazed her.
“Twilight?”
Twilight flinched.
“Y-Yes?” she replied, her own cheeks reddening. She must have looked strange, staring at the princess.
“Calm thyself, ’Tis only a meeting between princesses. You have been prepared for such diplomatic occasions before, have you not?”
Twilight nodded, but her eyes told a different story. “I-I understand.”
Luna slowly let go of her guarded countenance, smiling ruefully at Twilight. “You know,” she said softly. “I’m a little jealous of you.”
Twilight mouth fell open, she was so shocked she couldn’t even formulate a fitting reply.
“W-What?” she spluttered, then internally scolded herself.
Nice one, Twilight.
“I mean, what could you be jealous of?” Twilight continued quickly. “I’m so nervous that this seat’s the only thing that’s propping me up.”
Luna chuckled. “That’s it,” she emphasised the statement with a gentle tap of her hoof on the table. “It’s that openness with your feelings that make you so approachable, Twilight.” Luna vented a soft sigh, and her gaze grew wistful with an inner longing that Twilight found painful to even look at. Instead she concentrated on counting the woodgrains embedded in the table.
“You’re loved by almost everypony you meet, and you are well on your way to becoming a popular ruler. Even after, shall we say, ‘Twilight fever’ had ebbed, you are still adored in so many ways that I nor my sister could hope to attain.” Twilight heard the tea being lifted, then set back down.
Twilight flushed. “I-I wasn’t always like that,” she mumbled into her mane.
Luna nodded. “That’s partly why I’m envious. You make it look so easy, how ponies can change. My sister has vividly recounted how you’ve grown up, and I’ve seen it with mine own eyes.” Luna fiddled her hooves, then sighed. “I wish change would come so easily.”
Twilight bit her lip. The irony of the situation wasn’t lost on her.
“Luna I—”
A knock on the door interrupted her.
“Yes?” Luna called out, giving Twilight an apologetic glance.
The muffled voice of the guard filtered through.
“Discord requests to join the meeting, Princess.”
Luna shared a look with Twilight.
“Why not?” Twilight sighed. “At least he might explain himself.”
“Or infuriate us further,” Luna added wryly. Then she raised her voice. “Send him in!”
With a flash, Discord appeared in the centre of the table, arms outstretched as a magician would performing to an enraptured audience. Although his audience at the moment wasn’t particularly enraptured, nor so accommodating.
“So what’s your part in all of this?” Twilight demanded, deciding on impulse that the best defence would be to attack.
Discord looked affronted. “I balk at the insinuating undertone,” he replied with a pained claw to his feathered chest. “This was simply not my fault.”
Luna raised an eyebrow. “It bears all the markings of your foul work,” she ground out, “ do you not enjoy the Chaos?”
Discord waggled his clawed appendage to and fro, causing Luna’s eyes to go temporarily cross-eyed. Her disapproval upgraded to a menacing glare.
“I don’t deal with such things anymore,” he said dismissively. “I’m rather a fan of the artistry this other one has pulled off.”
“Other one?” queried Twilight sharply. “What other one? Another draconequus?!”
“Oh please, I’m unique, you can’t get more than one of me!” Discord examined his paw nonchalantly. “I simply deduced that if it wasn’t me, it must be something else.”
“How would you know that?” Twilight pressed.
Discord threw up his arms in frustration. “Why all the suspicion?! It’s not as if I’ve done anything for the last few months.”
Twilight’s eyebrows furrowed together. “Apart from the rainbow sheep.”
Discord chuckled, but raised a hoof. “Well now, that was—”
“Let us not forget to incident with the Canterlot fountains!” Luna interjected harshly. “Thou knowest the hardship we’ve had with the noble-folk!”
Discord flicked a claw. “Well you must admit they did deserve—”
“You gave life to my books and told them to go free!” Twilight snapped.
Discord guffawed. “Alright, you got me on that one, but it was a harmless prank between friends. I may be capricious, but I’m no longer malicious!”
Twilight sat back down in her seat and glared at the draconequus. “So what?” she said. “It’s something different?”
Discord cleared his throat and patted his brow with a freshly summoned handkerchief. “Yes, well, it’s definitely something powerful enough to traverse worlds.”
“Worlds?” Twilight spluttered. “You mean—”
“Honestly, Twilight, it is like you’ve never been to a different world before.” Discord tutted, patting Twilight on her head and mussing up her mane. Twilight wiggled out of his grasp and slapped away his paw, gripping her mane protectively as the draconequus continued. “But you don’t have to believe me, the opportunity has come to give you a taste of, shall we say, an alternative perspective?” He snapped his claws, disappearing in the momentarily blinding light.
Luna shook her head. “That draconequus always gets under my coat,” she muttered bitterly. “I cannot see the good my sister sees in him.”
Twilight sighed. “Most of us can’t, but Fluttershy does.” Twilight rubbed a weary hoof over her face. “And as much as I hate to admit it, he does come in handy every now and then.” She forced herself to slowly unwind. “Fluttershy trusts him, and I trust Fluttershy. Which means I trust Discord—” Twilight hesitated then placed her head in her hooves “—dear Celestia, I never thought I would ever say that.”
If Luna was at unease with Twilight’s choice of words she didn’t show it. “Perhaps Discord has been lying, or creating a false illusion to stir up some trouble?” Luna proffered. “I would think that would be much like the Discord we know.”
Twilight looked away. “Ahem, yes, the possibility has occurred to me. If that’s the case then… who is the pony standing over there?”
Even Luna couldn’t help but gasp in surprise. “Sister?!”
Princess Celestia of Equestria stared down her sister coldly. “You,” she spoke in stentorian tones, “are not my sister.”
Luna balked. “But—”
“My word,” Celestia interrupted. “Do not get fresh with me, Princess Luna. I know you may think I am your sister, but I am not this world’s Celestia.” She rolled her eyes. “When I came to this world there were all these friendly subjects, acting all familiar with me.” She snorted. “Unacceptable, is this a kingdom I have created even as an alternate version of myself? I would have expected better.”
Twilight and Luna glanced at each other. They were both taken aback by the sheer aggression this alicorn showed. Galvanising herself into action, Twilight got out of her seat and gave Celestia a small bow. “Of course, Princess,” she said smoothly. Time to put those diplomatic skills the Princess had been teaching her to use. She indicated to a vacant seat on the opposite side of the table. “If you would like to take a seat?” Twilight offered.
Celestia accepted the invitation stiffly. “Ah I see Twilight, that even in this universe you are dependable as ever.” She sat down in what could only be described as gracefully, but her posture was ramrod stiff with her eyes locked at a fixed height. “Now,” Celestia said. “We may begin.”
“Sister—”
“Do not presume that I will tolerate that slip one more time!” Celestia yelled. She slammed a hoof into the table. “I am not your Celestia. I want to return to my world, and you shall help me in doing so.”
Luna sat back down, her eyes downcast. Twilight sank into her seat, the glare from Celestia’s visage too familiar and too severe to reconcile. She instinctively shrunk, trying to make herself as small as possible, as if she was trying to disappear into her seat.
Celestia didn’t say anything for a moment or two, Twilight couldn’t see it, but she assumed she was trying to get a grip on her rage.
“As you know,” Celestia continued with some difficulty. “I do not have a firmest grip on temper. I must apologise for my lack of propriety. I rarely have much tolerance for easily rectifiable mistakes. I am aware of such hypocrisy when dealing with such familiar faces, so I slip into a familiar routine. Changelings, you realise, it is a conditioned response, and I’m afraid an association has been made in my mind.” Twilight glanced up to meet Celestia’s… for lack of a better word molten gaze.
Celestia raised an eyebrow. “Similar in look, but different in bearing and attitude.”
Celestia took a moment to sip at the cold tea. She didn’t seem to mind, in fact, the tea settled down with suddenly billowing steam. Twilight’s eyes widened as she realised that Celestia had passively cast a heating spell without the added protection of a transitive framework. That was beyond reckless!
A flash appeared in the centre of the room.
Celestia swept her gaze to sudden appearance of Discord. “Ah, Discord, I was wondering where you went.” She glanced back at the two ponies on the other side of the table. “It seems you found no need to return him to stone… for the third time.”
Discord waddled over to Luna, putting Luna squarely between himself and Celestia.
“You know, when I first found her, I thought, ‘Wouldn’t this be fun?’,” he muttered.
“What changed your mind?” Luna whispered back.
“Stop whispering and attend me,” Celestia commanded, her hoof struck the table with enough force to send a crack in the middle of the table. Luna leaped back from the sudden act of violence, her chair skittering back and narrowly missing Discord who managed to sidestep the chair equally narrowly. Twilight glanced between them wide-eyed.
“That’s what,” Discord replied wryly. “This Celestia’s a loose cannon, and this is coming from me, the Lord of Chaos!”
Celestia didn’t seem impressed. She glared at each of them in turn, then cleared her throat, bringing her voice down from a bellow to a soft, but unmistakably hostile, tone. “Well I suppose I am honour-bound to wish you no ill will,” Celestia directed that statement at Discord. She turned back and addressed Luna and Twilight, taking a deep breath. “I apologise for the damage to your furnishings. Everything back home had been fortified, so I am simply unused to flimsy nature of your fittings.” She paused slightly. “Forgive me.” Though each apology was well-meant, they did sound like they were dragged bodily out of her mouth every time. With a start, Twilight realised that Celestia was unused to explaining herself, or apologising, and that she was certainly making an effort to do both.
“That’s okay,” Twilight replied with a somewhat forced smile. “No harm done, we just want our Celestia back, so it’s in our best interests to take you back.” She cleared her throat. “Without a preliminary analysis I can’t tell you much, but I’d like to participate in some tests with Berchruder matrices to determine if we can pinpoint…” Twilight trailed off as Celestia eyed her critically. Her searching gaze reminded her of the School’s examination board. Especially of Mistress Pierce, with the way they penetrated right to her soul. Despite that, a slight smile played upon her lips, as if she were amused.
“Hmm, competent, knowledgeable and from the looks of things—” Celestia took in her wings “—powerful.” Celestia grinned at the alicorn in a way a cat might to a rat. “Perhaps you would like to be under my employ instead of the other Celestia? You show much promise.”
Twilight didn’t know what to say. “W-What?” she squeaked.
Celestia got up from her seat and eyed Twilight more closely. “What I’m saying,” Celestia whispered conspiratorially. “Is that there are many, many, benefits as one of my retainers.”
Twilight rapidly reddened as Celestia barked a laugh. “Ah, but perhaps not so much if you are easily teased as my own. Though what you have proposed makes sense. Very well, I will submit to your tests. Though much as I’d like to satisfy some of my curiosity, my subjects must be worried during my extended absence. I must return to secure Equestrian borders.” She turned back and addressed them all. “We shall meet again early in the morning to tackle the problem. Though I may not look it, I’m also at the end of my proverbial rope, and I will appreciate some rest.”
Twilight rose, but Celestia stared her down again. “Do not worry, I will find my own way to a guest suite. I bid you all a good day.”
With that Celestia left the room, with its occupants feeling as if a storm had just thundered past.
“See?” Discord muttered. “That mare scares me, and there’s not much that scares me at all.”
Luna bit her lip and nodded. “Twilight?” she queried, noticing that Twilight was still staring at the door. “Poor mare she must be—”
“Amazing!” Twilight exclaimed, beaming from ear to ear. She caught the judgemental looks Discord and Luna sent her way and flushed slightly. “I-I mean look,” she said. “We get to see a side of Celestia we’ve never seen before!”
Luna frowned, but didn’t say anything.
Twilight faltered at Luna’s look, but continued hastily. “What I’m saying is that this is an unprecedented opportunity to see what life would be like if we were a little different.” She turned to Luna. “Haven’t you ever wished things were a little different?” She turned to Discord. “What the world would be like if Celestia had a altered personality?”
Luna conceded the point with a nod. “Let us not get too ahead of ourselves, Princess Twilight. Our number one priority is to retrieve my real sister.” Luna mumbled something that Twilight couldn’t catch, but didn’t have a chance to ask when Luna continued. “We must restore them both to their rightful places.”
Twilight sank back, mollified by Luna’s reasoning.
“Okay,” she said. Then a thought occurred to her. “I wonder what dinner would be like?”
Discord shuddered. He raised a claw in farewell. “One meeting was enough for me,” he muttered, and snapped away in a flash.