//------------------------------//
// The Smell of Tomato Soup 
// Story: Help Me 
// by RoyalBardofCanterlot 
//------------------------------//

Twilight Velvet tried not to worry. Being that she had one child in the royal guard and one child living far away this was difficult. Still, she knew her daughter was powerful and had never faced a challenge she couldn't overcome. She had defeated Nightmare Moon and redeemed Princess Luna. She had overcome the Spirit of Chaos. She was the personal student of Princess Celestia and among the strongest living unicorns. Still, Princess Celestia herself had shown up at her door and told her that she needed to check up on Twilight. Velvet had tried to get more information, but all Celestia would tell her was that Twilight needed her mother. Something had happened. Twilight had experimented with dark magic. Disaster had been just barely averted. Something was wrong, Celestia had seen it in her eyes. When she had tried to talk to her student about it, Twilight had shut her out.

Twilight never shut Celestia out. She hung on every word that came out of the Sun Princesses' mouth like it was the water of life itself. Velvet had promised Celestia that she would visit Twilight. Right after Celestia left Velvet had departed to catch the train to Ponyville, leaving a note for Night Light. While on the train, thoughts wrestled together in her mind. She couldn't deny she was disappointed in Twilight for using dark magic, but all unicorns experimented. What concerned her most was the fact that Celestia couldn't get through to her. While she'd never admit it she'd always felt Celestia was closer to Twilight than she herself was.  After all, Twilight had been her personal student and Celestia had taught her so much more than Velvet ever could have, been her confidante for years. If Celestia couldn't get through to her, what hope did Velvet have?

She sighed and looked out the window at the green hills rushing by. Ponyville was coming closer.
...
Twilight watched the pot of tomato soup as it boiled on the stove. The sweet smell spread throughout the library. She had sent Spike away, telling him to get out and enjoy the day. As for her, not a ray of light penetrated the darkened library. All the windows were closed. The blinds were pulled. Her friends had been informed that she was not too be disturbed. Today, Twilight simply wasn't in the mood for friendship. The smell of tomato soup reminded her of laying in bed, sick. Her mother would always make her tomato soup when she was sick. Later, Celestia would make her the same on Twilight's insistence.

The thought of Celestia made her smile, then made her frown. Celestia had tried to speak to her today. She had told her to go away. Celestia had been hurt, shocked. Better memories floated in her head. There was the time she had been sick, but trudged to lessons anyway. Celestia had sent her to bed and made her soup. That day had been spent with her sheltered in Celestia's wing while Celestia had told her stories. Celestia loved her. Upon further reflection, her parents loved her too. Her parents whom she wouldn't be making her weekly visits too this week. That was okay. They'd understand.

Her friends loved her. The friends she had just sent away. 

It was too bad she didn't deserve their friendship.

It was too bad she didn't deserve love.

A smile spread across her face at the sight of the noose on the table.

It would all be over soon. One last meal and then...well, since the Princess didn't have the guts to do it, she would end herself. In ancient times (before Celestia banned the death penalty), the dark wizard was bound, blindfolded, their horn removed and they were publicly hanged. Twilight had always admired the ancient ones swift approach to justice. She had always agreed with the death penalty, especially for dark magic.

After all, magic was a tool for light. To pervert it was monstrous.

She was monstrous.

The tomato soup was done. Pouring herself a bowl, she sat down at the table and sipped it. She savored every drop of the sweet, savory soup. She relished the memories it brought up. When it was done, she walked over to the sink and washed the bowl out.

It was time.

She picked up the noose with her hooves, walked to the living room and positioned a stool next to her. Climbing up on the stool, she tied the rope to the ceiling fan and placed it around her neck.

She felt no sorrow, no despair. She was beyond such feelings. There was only profound relief as she prepared to leap.

"TWILIGHT SPARKLE!"

She froze, midway between life and death. Her mother had just walked into the library. For one strange moment they stared at each other. Velvet stood there, staring at her daughter. Her daughter, noose around her neck, stared back.

Velvet approached her slowly, like one would do with a frightened animal.

"Twilight...honey...I don't know what's going on, but...let's talk."

Twilight seemed to be frozen by indecision.

Velvet's horn lit up and her magic lifted the noose from around her neck. Twilight didn't move to stop her. Velvet came closer. Twilight came off the step and Velvet gathered her up in a hug. She began to weep on her mother's shoulder while Velvet deepened the embrace.

"I-I don't know what's wrong with me, Mommy." Twilight choked out.

Velvet stroked her mane. "Why Twilight? Why would you try to...to hurt yourself?" The tears she was trying to contain fell from her eyes. "Do you know what your death would have done to me? Your father and your brother? We'd be devastated."

Twilight sobbed. "I-I thought the world would be better off without me. I did something terrible."

"Celestia told me."

"You must hate me!" Twilight pushed Velvet away. "There's no way you can still love me-that anyone can still love me-after what I did!"

"Twilight, all Celestia said was that you cast a want it-need it spell. Yes, it was wrong, but there's no need to kill yourself over it!"

Velvet tried to hug Twilight again only this time she was pushed away.

"N-no. Go away!"

Velvet placed a hoof on her daughter's shoulder. This reminded her of so many tantrums her daughter had thrown when she was younger. "Twilight. I'm not going to leave you like this. I couldn't."

Twilight wiped at her eyes. "If I go on like this, I'll just hurt more and more ponies."

Velvet walked closer to Twilight. "If you go on like what? Twilight, I don't understand."

Twilight held her head. "Ever since Discord...and Nightmare Moon even..." She turned away, her tail swishing violently. "I've been having these thoughts."

"What kind of thoughts?"

"Thoughts about dark magic. Thoughts about hurting living things, draining other's magic...manipulating them." She laughed bitterly. "Do you know how easy it would be for a unicorn of my gifts? I could enslave entire nations."

"Is that what you want to do?"

Twilight shook her head. "No. Celestia, no. That's why I have to die. If I'm dead I can't hurt anyone."

Velvet shook her head. "What about Spike? That dragon is practically your son. Would you just leave him all alone?"

"He'd be okay. He's going to outlive me anyway."

"He's a baby, Twilight. What about Celestia? How do you think she'd feel about your death? How do you think Shining Armor would feel? Or your father? Or me?"

"It doesn't matter. What ponies feel doesn't matter."

"Twilight, look at me."

Twilight didn't turn.

"Twilight, please." 

Velvet walked over so that she was facing Twilight. Twilight's eyes were completely bloodshot. Dark circles she hadn't noticed before hinted that Twilight had not been sleeping for a long time.

She extended a hoof and placed it on Twilight's cheek.

"Fist off, I still love you. Okay? So does Celestia. She was the one that sent me."

"How? How could anypony still love me?"

"Because I'm your mother Twilight and Celestia might as well be your second one. Everpony makes mistakes, but...I'm not sure if you were in your right mind when you made yours."

Twilight shook her head."What if I do it again? What if I do something worse next time?"

"Canterlot Medical's not that far away."

Twilight bit her lip. "Are you saying I need to be locked away in a psych ward?"

"Twilight. You need help. Think about this rationally. If you broke your hoof you'd go to the doctor wouldn't you?"

"Of course and I know where you're going-"

"You need help and you are going to the doctor."

"I..."

"I'm not giving you a choice." Velvet said firmly.

Twilight sighed. "Okay. Okay, I'll go."

Twilight followed Velvet as they walked to the front door.

"Let's go to Ponyville Medical Center. It's closer." Twilight said.

"As long as you get help."

They stepped out onto the street. It was a rather crowded day, but they made their way through the crowd. They trotted in silence till they reached the hospital. Twilight hesitated. 

"I'm here. I'm right here with you." Velvet told her.

Twilight walked through the doors. Velvet went to the front desk to sign her in while Twilight took a seat.
...
Dr. Stable walked into the sterile room Twilight and Velvet had been directed too. Twilight had said little since they had left the library. Now, she was squeezing onto her mother's hoof like when she had been a child. Velvet squeezed back.

"I just realized, Spike will be worried when he sees I'm gone." She mumbled to herself. She was slouching downward in her chair.

"I'll check up on him." Velvet promised.

Dr. Stable cleared his throat. "So, why don't you tell me what brings you here today?"

"Didn't you read my chart?" Twilight snapped.

"I did, but in these cases I like to hear from the patients themselves." He turned to Velvet. "Miss Velvet, I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"No. I told her I wouldn't leave her."

"Mommy-Mom-it's okay."

"Can't I stay?" Velvet asked.

"It's against policy, Ma'am."

"I'll be right outside the door, okay?" Velvet said. She stood and left the room, leaving Twilight alone with the doctor.

"I tried to hang myself.I...I've been thinking about killing myself for a while." Twilight said.

"How long have you had those thoughts?"

Twilight thought for a few moments. "Since the battle with Discord."

"Hmm...we can run a few tests for magical possession. Have you experienced any other symptoms? Hallucinations? Hearing voices?"

Twilight cut her eyes to the side and refused to speak.

"Miss Sparkle...I want to help you. To do that you have to be honest with me."

"I've been hearing voices." Twilight admitted in a small whisper.

"I see. I'm advising that you stay over for a twenty-four hour evaluation period."

Twilight didn't respond. Dr. Stable called Velvet back into the room and explained that Twilight would be staying. Velvet hugged Twilight and promised her that she would look after Spike.
...
When Velvet returned to the library she found Spike and five unfamiliar mares. Spike immediately ran up to her and grabbed her leg.

"Nana, have you seen Twilight? Do you know where she is?"

The five mares gathered around her and Spike.

"This is Twilight's mom, Twilight Velvet." Spike introduced. The other mares introduced themselves. 

"So, where is Twilight?" Applejack asked. "Spike sent a letter to the Princess, but she didn't know so he called us over. We looked over town and couldn't find her."

"Twilight's in the hospital."

"Oh my gosh!" Pinkie said. "We have to visit her! Maybe we can throw her a party to cheer her up!"

"What happened?" Fluttershy asked.

Velvet wondered if she should tell them. "Twilight is in the psychiatric hospital."

There were gasps and looks of concern from Twilight's friends.

"Wait, how'd she end up in a loony bin?" Dash asked, earning a surprisingly harsh glare from Pinkie Pie.

"It's called a psychiatric hospital, Dashie. It's NOT funny."

Everpony gave surprised glances to the pink pony who was definitely not laughing for once.

"Can we visit her?" Applejack asked.

"I think you can. I need to get home to Night Light. Spike, Twilight asked me to look after you so I suppose you'll have to come home with me."

"No way. I need to be here when Twilight comes back."

Velvet leaned down so her muzzle was at the level of Spike's mouth. "Spike, I know you're worried about Twilight. I am too, but there's nothing we can do for her right now. You can sleep in Twilight's old room. You still have that basket?"

"I do. I've never slept away from Twilight."

"You can sleep with me if you want."

"Okay, Nana." Spike leaned into her and Velvet gave him a nuzzle. "I want to visit Twilight too."

"Alright. We can do it together."
...
Twilight sat on the white bed, reading through "Fruit's Interpretation of Dreams" that she had requested from the hospital library. There was only so much staring out a window that one could do even if the view of the meadow was nice and peaceful. The room she was sitting in was a blinding color of white. The walls were white and the bed was white. The small white bookshelf fit in perfectly with the rest of the room. The rays of the sun filtered through and played against the walls. Twilight turned a page in her book. The doctors still didn't know what was wrong with her. They had ran a battery of tests. Nothing had been affecting her magic. There was no dark curses on her. Though if it was Discord's magic would they be able to tell?  At least the room was peaceful. It reminded her of her old tower. The doctor had strongly advised her to go out in the common area outside, but she didn't feel like it. Part of her wondered if this wasn't all a big mistake. It was true, she had tried to kill herself. Yet, did it really call for all this?

There was a knock at the door and the doctor walked in. "Twilight, you have some friends here to see you."

Twilight looked up from the book as her mother, Spike and friends walked in. Her eyes widened and she hurriedly stood.

"You told them?" Twilight hissed at her mother. Spike ran up and hugged her leg. Twilight hugged back and shot a glare at her mother.

"Simmer down, Sugarcube. We all wanted to know if you were okay." Applejack said. She walked up and nuzzled her. Twilight soon found herself enveloped in a group hug from all her friends, Spike and her mom.

Twilight felt herself begin to cry again as she returned the hug. "What you all must think of me..."

"We think you need help just like you've helped us in the past-like we've all helped each other at one time or another." Applejack said. "I'll bring you some fresh apple fritters tomorrow."

"Do you suppose they'll let me put up some decorations? That would do wonders for your mood." Rarity said. 

"I-I don't-" Twilight was about to say till Pinkie interrupted her.

"Oh, what kind of cake do you want for your party when you get out?" Pinkie asked.

"Um, vanilla?" Twilight ventured.

"Hey! I know what would cheer you up!" Dash announced. "I mean they put you in here cause you tried to off yourself right? So, I bet a personal flying show would cheer you up! I'll have to work on it though." She gave a whirl in midair.

Twilight gave a tentative smile at Dash's antics. "I'd like that. Can you maybe do the Filly Flash? Have I ever told you how much I like that one?"

"Ooh, or maybe I can bring you over a bunny! Or a stuffed animal? I have one for when I have nightmares."

"Oh...oh, you guys!" Twilight began to cry. "Thank you! I don't deserve friends like you!"

"Yeah you do, Twi." Applejack told her, giving her a pat on the back. "Look at all we've gone through together. We beat Discord. We'll get through this too."

Twilight hugged them and they all nuzzled and embraced her. There was plans made of what kind of party Pinkie would throw, Twilight and Applejack talked about the harvest coming in (Twilight promised to be out in time to help Applejack with it), Fluttershy told a story about a new baby bear getting into some honey that had Twilight laughing for the first time in days. Hours passed and soon visiting time was over. Spike didn't want to leave and Twilight didn't want him to leave either so the doctor said Spike could say. Night fell and Twilight reclined on the bed. Spike could barely sleep without his basket, but Twilight's soft fur made a great substitute. As Twilight laid there, with Spike by her side, memories of her friend's laughter still in her ears, Twilight felt that maybe she was going to be alright.