//------------------------------// // Chapter 4 // Story: Home is Where the Heart is // by smileyfacer //------------------------------// For a filly with much on her mind, Scootaloo never thought that school could pass any slower. It seemed that every time she looked at the large clock with two rearing fillies placed on the end of the needles, it was as if they had gone backwards. She carelessly rested her face in her two hooves, and felt her eyelids growing heavier. Before long, her eyes were shut, but not without slightly flickering as she failed the attempt of staying awake. The world around her grew more silent, and miss Cherilee's voice only became a faint echo in her ears. Wild images began to take shape and swirl around in her mind, but she had no time to dream before she was rudely awakened. The school bell had rung, just like it did in the early mornings. The usual piercing noise almost hurt in Scootaloo's sensitive ears as she violently rose. She gasped loudly and took a quick glance around to make sure that no one had seen her nap. "Scoots?" Scootaloo turned her head in a rush and faced Sweetie Belle. "You got something... sloppy, on your cheek." she quietly said, and pointed towards the lower corner of the pegasus filly's lips. Scootaloo quickly wiped the drippling saliva off her cheek, and smiled sheepishly at the unicorn filly. "Thanks." "Anytime Scootaloo! Wanna join us for some serious crusading?" the white filly asked, and let out a wide smile, before turned and proceeded to walk over to Applebloom, clearly just expecting the pegasus to follow. Scootaloo sighed heavily, before quietly trotting after the two fillies, but a voice suddenly made all of them stop in their tracks. "Scootaloo, can I have a minute of your time please?" The Crusaders turned their heads to see that it was miss Cherilee who had spoken. Scootaloo eyed her friends with caution, who shrugged, and whispered: "We'll meet you at the clubhouse." Scootaloo nodded, and gave a slight wave as the two fillies left for the clubhouse, which the pegasus filly almost called her second home, before reentering the school, with Cherilee in front of her. "Have I done anything wrong, miss?" Scootaloo nervously asked and awkwardly shifted as she sat upon the chair in front of Cherilee's desk. "No, not at all, dear Scootaloo. In fact, I'm afraid I've done something wrong." Scootaloo's eyes widened at the thought of her seemingly perfect teacher, to ever do something wrong. "You don't ever do anything wrong, miss Cherilee! You're the perfect teacher!" Scootaloo exclaimed, and almost seemed outraged by the mere thought. "Scootaloo, nobody can even imagine being perfect. If life was perfect, wouldn't you find it slightly boring?" Cherilee asked, and hope to get some answers out of the little filly. Cherilee had always tried to pay a little more to the orphan filly than the rest of the class, even though she wasn't the only one. The few other foals that were orphans like her, seemed quite satisfied with their lives compared to the circumstances, and to the teacher's surprise, most of them had already gotten their cutie marks, whereas Scootaloo had not. She seemed far more mature than the other orphan foals that had received their cutie marks, and as it seemed to be the struggle with young foals, they had self-esteem troubles, that resulted in no cutie mark. This would only make the problem even worse, as this would cause the foals without cutie marks, would be bullied by those with cutie marks, just like it happened with the two other fillies, Sweetie Belle and Applebloom. Nonetheless, just those fillies were bursting with self-confidence, and Cherilee suspected that it was exactly Scootaloo's doing. The daring filly had quickly begun to idolize the agile flyer Rainbow Dash, and had almost gotten the exact same confidence that the flying mare was so known for. But for some reason, that confidence had faded massively, and it was Cherilee's intention to find out what. "I guess so." "Is there anything the matter Scootaloo? You haven't said much these past weeks. Is there anything troubling you?" the teacher gently said, and started to gently rub the filly's tiny hoof. Scootaloo looked at it, before frowning and pulling her own hoof away. "I'm fine." she growled, and crossed her forelegs in annoyance. "Scootaloo, dear. I'm only concerned about you, and I would like to help you if you're fee-" "I said, I'm feeling fine!" Scootaloo roared as she violently got of the chair beneath her, and galloped out the door. "Scootaloo!" miss Cherilee shouted, and quickly tried to catch up with the filly as she reached the entrance, but Scootaloo was already gone. No matter how hard her eyes scouted for the orange pegasus, Cherilee could not see her at all. The teacher sighed, and went back inside the classroom to gather her own teacher edition schoolbooks, before she went outside again, and locked the front door. She went around the school just to doublecheck that everything was locked up as it ought to, before she headed to Ponyville. It seemed appropriate to pay the headmistress of the orphanage a visit. Scootaloo had no clue how to respond to miss Cherilee's question. She hated that her teacher could've read her so easily, because that meant that Sweetie Belle and Applebloom must know too. At the moment, she found herself way too sappy for her own liking. But she couldn't help it. After Cherilee's question Scootaloo had galloped out of the classroom, and immediately head for her own safehaven. Scootaloo had found it when she had just arrived in Ponyville, and had gone exploring the harmless woods surrounding the small village. It was quite a dense part of the forest, and Scootaloo clenched her teeth as she felt the thorns scratch her orange coat. She kept going through the thick thornbrushes for quite awhile, and for a minute she was unsure of whether or not she found the place she searched for. The dense bushes decreased in size and soon, she came to small clearing. It was somewhat small and round, but she was sure that all of the Crusaders could be there. The sun had not yet begun to set, and was still somewhat high in the sky, but she had found out that no matter how high or low the sun was, the light reached exactly that spot she stood in. She flexed her small muscles as the warmth of the golden rays struck her sore coat, but then pressed on. There was a small path on the exact opposite side of her, which she fondly remembered she followed the first time she found the first place. The first time Scootaloo found this place, she had gotten herself lost, and in fear, she had galloped wildly through the thick thornbrushes, and fell over a big stump, and into the clearing she was now in. It hadn't been as nice as it was now, and Scootaloo had spent a lot of time trying to fix the place up. The usual tall grass was now much shorter, and the small pebbles that had been spread around the clearing had been thrown far into the woods. As she walked across the clearing, she noticed several butterflies flying around in it, and instantly thought of Fluttershy, whom she was sure would love this little place of Scootaloo's. She was a bit torn between telling Sweetie Belle and Applebloom about this place, because as much as she'd like to share this beautiful place with her fellow Crusaders, in a sense, it was her own little haven. Scootaloo's place of dreams and hopes, that she ever so wished to come true. She cheerfully trotted a few more seconds, before she reached her destination, and was as always awestruck as she took in the sight. Ponyville had never seemed to small and insignifcant, and it somehow fitted with just how Scootaloo was feeling. When she sat there, from her little personal safehaven, Ponyville mattered little to none. But she still saw ponies going about to do their last chores of the day. She could faintly make out some colors that she recognized, but she was too far away to ever know if it was someone she knew. The sun seemed to hit the roof of all the buildings perfectly, and many of the colors seemed to shine ever so brightly in a fierce competition with the sun, before the cold and dark moon took over for the night. But in the bright daytime, Scootaloo could see the school, the orphanage, and farther out in the distance, she could see Sweet Apple Acres. It always boggled her mind how big the land that the Apple family owned when she went to this place, as it was massive. The meadow at the end stretched out into the horizon, and Scootaloo couldn't help but wonder what was in the distance. Was her real family there? Was her real home there? What exactly awaited behind the safe borders of Ponyville? The little filly sighed heavily, and looked up to one of the first stars that had begun to show their sparkles for today. It seemed unusually bright, and sparkled as if trying to compete with Celestia's sun. The tiny star seemed meek and tiny compared to the great circle of Celestia. But nonetheless, the star kept on shining. "I wish I knew my family. I wish I knew where I belong." she muttered under her breath, and her gaze returned towards her own small hooves. "I wish I had a family." the little filly whispered, barely audible, to any of the butterflies that cared to pay attention to her. She absentmindly started to trace circles with her hoofs, and her eyes were not paying attention to things she were drawing in the soft soil. But when it did, she focused her eyes upon the painting, and grew pale. A tiny family of pegasus ponies stood before her. Whereas the mare remained without wings, the stallion, big and strong had very muscular wings. She noticed two pegasus fillies, one bigger than the other. She couldn't help but wonder which one was her. Was she the youngest or oldest? She liked the thought of taking care of a sist- "No, no, no!" Scootaloo screamed, and violently erased the drawing with her hoof, before she collapsed into hard sobs. Tears began to stream down the filly's face, and like she always did, she started to count the tears to later punish herself. Scootaloo loathed tears. They were for silly and sappy fillies. She was sure that Rainbow Dash had never shed a tear in her life. She wanted to be like Rainbow Dash! Strong, agile, and hopefully a Wonderbolt. Scootaloo smiled at the thought of becoming a Wonderbolt, just like Rainbow Dash hoped, but those tiny hopes of achieving something great were instantly crushed as a tiny voice inside Scootaloo said: But you're a chicken, Scootaloo! You can't fly, can you? You'll never be like Rainbow Dash! Scootaloo let out a wild cry as she sheltered her eyes with her hooves, and tried to hold the tears in. Her hooves were not enough to keep the tears at bay, and she hardly noticed how her tears started to soak the soil beneath her, and how snot ran down her snout. She tried to dry her tears away, and hold them away by shutting her eyes tightly. But there were so many, and after what seemed hours of struggling to hold back tears, Scootaloo cared not. The little filly continued her harsh sobs, but laid down instead of sitting. She crossed her small forelegs, sobbed even louder than before, and shivered slightly as a cold wind brushed over her, but otherwise, she cared not. She was sure that some sort of animal would hear her, but she didn't care. She didn't care at all. Scootaloo lost track of time as she laid upon the cliff and tried to behold Ponyville through her thick tears, but it came increasingly harder, even though her eyes seemed to run dry for tears, exhaustion began to take hold of the little filly. She fought hard to keep her eyes open, but it was a hard battle that she could not win, and after a few minutes of useless struggling, the loud sobbing was reduced to a few weak whimpers in her restless sleep.