A Troll Through the Park

by Spanner

Prologue: Event Zero

A great white mare stood on the balcony railing of Ponyville’s Golden Oaks library. Her balance was far better than most pegasi, but that wasn’t unexpected from a being of such longevity and grace.

Without a second thought or bit of difficulty, she grasped the sun with magic that dwarfed that of dozens of unicorns combined. The searing orb yielded to the force and came to rest below the horizon. Finishing her work she turned to the sound of her student’s rushing hoofsteps.

“How did you know I was in trouble?” the young unicorn asked.

“Your friend Spike made me aware you were letting your fears get the best of you. I commend him for taking your feelings seriously,” Celestia answered in her sagely voice.

The whole town fighting over a doll. It’s better than classic.

“Now if you will all excuse me, I must return to Canterlot. I’m expecting some mail.”

This has certainly been a day to remember. I must go write this one in my journal, Celestia thought as she took off from Twilight's balcony with a single flap of her satin wings.

“Wait! Do you want that to be a letter from each of us or one big letter,” Twilight hastily blurted out, as she teleported to the flying princess. Her hooves were outstretched in front of her. For a moment, Twilight was touching Celestia’s flank in mid air. The alicorn was nearing the end of casting her teleportation spell when she looked back at a blushing Twilight.

The Princess felt the familiar flash of teleportation, but she was, falling?

Celestia landed on the hard dirt in front of the library. Ow, oh my head. Falls don't usually hurt this much.

“Uh Twi, you do know unicorns don’t fly?”

“Oh my gosh Twilight. Are you okay? Do you need a book on first aid?”

Celestia’s eyes were still closed. Those certainly aren’t royal guards...  wait, ‘Twi?’

As she finally looked up, she thought, what are Applejack and Spike doing in Canterlot? Wait, the library? What in the name of... me, is going on here?

“AH!” Celestia exclaimed, as Pinkie Pie nearly landed on top of her. The party pony proceeded to shake her head, releasing a silly sound as her tongue waggled around.

“Oh Twilight, I can see why you jumped off your balcony. It’s soo much fun! Pinkie shouted giddily.

“I didn't jump off the balcony, and where is Twilight? I don’t see her,” Celestia asked in a shaky voice, her concern growing every second.

Applejack scratched her chin. “Hey Fluttershy! I think Twi hit her head harder than we thought. Didn’t you say one a yer pets got that amnesia or what’s it the other day?" The yellow pegasus jumped backward at Applejack's initial yell. Fluttershy slowly crept out the door to the dazed Celestia.

They were calling me Twilight. This must be some sort of joke?

Celestia looked to her gusts. “Don’t you mean Princ— AH! My coat, my hooves. They're...  they're...”

“A dreadful mess,” Rarity interrupted. “I must get you to the spa first light tomorrow.”

An ecstatic look formed on Pinkie’s face.”Prince Ah? I haven’t heard of him. I'll need to throw him a party!?”

Celestia looked herself over, then spotted her star stricken hindquarters. Only it wasn't the orange blazing star she was akin to. On her flank was a reddish pink six pointed burst, surrounded by five white points and smaller stars. Celestia stared at her student's former flank for longer than what may be considered normal. If staring at one's butt in public could be construed as such.

“Oh my.” That confirms it.

“Oh my what? Do you have something to share, so we don’t have to go through all that chaos again?” A cyan hoof pointed out towards the fields where ponies were wrestling not hours before. “Just get out with it already.” Rainbow dash said, almost pressing into her purple muzzle.

“Um... Dash... maybe you...” Futtershy tried to quietly interject.

“Give her some space to breathe,” Applejack interrupted Fluttershy, and started pushing Rainbow Dash out of the way. The meek mare was clearly miffed.

I can’t let them know it’s me. This is just too bizarre. Where has Twilight gone? Celestia thought as she mindlessly continued to gaze off into space.

Rainbow dash refused to break eye contact, even after being moved back towards the Library by Applejack's forceful shoving.

“Oh my... we need to write that letter to Celestia.” Please, please buy it. She prayed. Hoping the other Elements would just gloss over her awkwardness.

She was pleased to see the group of mares sigh in relief, despite her overly big grin.

“Well I guess that means she’s got her head on straight," remarked AJ.

Straight? Really! Your friend teleports off of a two story building, starts mumbling nonsense, then stares at herself before wanting to write a letter, and that's... NORMAL!?

Rainbow Dash almost seemed disappointed that all the excitement was over. “Yep she’s fine, only our egghead Twilight would sustain a head injury and want to get to work so fast."

Wow, does Twilight have to put up with that lip on a daily basis?

I just have to stay unnoticed until I get back to the castle. Wait, I won’t be able to raise the sun, and if I can’t get back tonight, then everypony will...

Celestia’s thoughts were interrupted by the shrill voice of a Pinkie Pie.

“Into an enormously huge, entire town in total chaos, Princess has to save the day problem!” Pinkie finished her part of the letter from her spot on the library floor.

Oh, how right you are Pinkie Pie. Total chaos indeed. Twilight told me about your powers, but they didn't warn you about this fiasco. Celestia looked towards the podium where Twilight's friends where writing the letter. Ah, I guess I get to say something to... myself?

“PS: Obviously, Spike did not have to learn a lesson...”

Darn it Spike! I wanted to tell myself that I make a great tyrannical role model and witness the looks on the faces of Twilight’s friends.

“Hey everypony! We should have a party! It could be a Twilight didn't get taken away and sent to magic kindergarten and probably didn't suffer a concussion party! It could even be a slumber party!” Pinkie exclaimed, as if the reveal of a slumber party was news worthy of the Equestrian Daily Prophet.

Magic kindergarten. The vision made her stifle a laugh. That little filly was soo cute, and destructive!

Celestia put on a false face of melancholy and tilted her ears back. “Sorry Pinkie Pie, I have lots of studying to attend to. I really must hit the books.”

“Is that just an excuse? Like when you skipped out on Gummy’s party?” Pinkie now clasped a bright desk lamp, from seemingly nowhere and flashed it in her face. Rainbow Dash gave the crazy symbol, with a twirl of her hoof towards the side of her head. Everypony else looked confused or chose to glare at Rainbow for the rude gesture.

There must be some topic of study, to convince them that I need my privacy…

Celestia beckoned for Rarity to get closer with her purple hoof.

“Oh, that’s what you are up to as of late.” Rarity’s eyes grew big, at the content of the whisper.

Applejack looked confused, until Rarity whispered to her and Fluttershy. Their eyes immediately widened as well.

“Alright, time to move on out Pinkie.” Applejack grabbed the resistant party pony by the tail and started for the stairs. Pinkie’s “Oky— doky— loaky?” was broken up by her head dropping down each drop of the steps as she was dragged down the oaken steps. At the bottom of the stairs, she could hear Pinkie mumble something about 'reading' versus 'hitting' books.

“I don’t get it. What did she say?” Rainbow Dash, begged for answers all the way to the door. "All I heard was something about compatibility lions and birds and the griffin gnomes?"

"Genome," Rarity corrected her, before pulling Dash along in her magic.

Applejack opened the door and paused in the exit. “We’ll tell you when you’re older.”

“We're the same age, AJ,” said Rainbow Dash.

The farm mare sighed and pointed to Spike.

"Oh. I knew that!" Rainbow grumbled incomprehensibly as she unwillingly floated outside.

The door finally closed. As the sound of Twilight's friends grew faint, panic grew inside of the princess as she bit her lower lip.

“Are you okay Twilight? Do I need to send another letter to the princess, because you look really nervous?” Spike set a claw on her mane. Spike flinched at the same time as his librarian caretaker, but kept his claw in place to comfort her.

“No, I’m just thinking about what everypony in town will think of me tomorrow.”

“Well you did entrance everypony with a magical doll.” The baby dragon bit his lip for the comment. He expected one of Twilight’s usual scowls, but it didn't come.

“Spike, just give me some space to collect my thoughts.” Spike nodded and went downstairs to check for gems that Twilight may have hid from him. For some reason, all of his precious gems kept disappearing.

Celestia watched the young dragon with not an inconsiderable amount of guilt.

What if I can’t raise the sun in time, what if Equestria loses faith in me? What if they think my dearest sister is back on the rise? what if I’m stuck like this? She looked down at her purple coat.

I’m so scrawny, and... normal.

Celestia’s pupils shrank at her next hypothetical thought. What if Luna finds out about this? I would never hear the end of it. Celestia checked to make sure Spike wasn't around, before declaring “This is the worst, possible, thing!”

“Uh, Twilight, what are you doing?” Spike observed the purple unicorn rummaging through drawers, cupboards, and generally tearing through every nook and cranny. The dragon just watched, while sucking on a large orange crystal.

There was an awkward pause, as she almost forgot to respond to her student’s name. “I’m looking for the money I... Celestia sent me last week.”

“Uh, Twilight, you spent all those bits on books. Remember?"

“Oh, yeah. I just had to get those books!,” she said, swinging a hoof across her opposite shoulder, in an 'aw shucks' sort of motion. Those bits were for food too. She is kind of an 'egghead.’ Well, a late night train ticket is now out of the question.

“You seem pretty stressed out Twilight. Are you sure you don't want to write about it? I haven’t sent the revised letter to the Princess yet.” Spike pulled out a quill and held it up to Celestia.

He turned his clawed toes inward and fidgeted to and fro. "You know you can always tell me anything right?"

The Sun Princess was paying no attention. What to do, what to do? Her pacing certainly wasn't calming the purple dragon. Suddenly a string of thoughts came to mind.

“Uh, Twilight, that smile is kind of scaring me.” Spike backed away in case another magical mishap happened to send him across the library. To his mild surprise, Twilight seemed to have calmed down.

“Go ahead and send that letter. I would like to write a personal letter to Celestia, in addition to that letter,” Celestia said in renewed confidence.

Referring to herself was getting to be fun. It was a novel experience if nothing else. In fact, all of this was beginning to excite Her Majesty.

If I can get the whole raising the sun gig under control, maybe I can have some fun in the meantime. The two letters were promptly delivered by Spike, who was instructed not to look at her private message.

Celestia went to sleep with two thoughts on her mind. I may have less magic power, but I do have all my spell knowledge, and at least Twilight’s bed is comfortable.

To be continued.