The nights all seem to blur together. One is just the same as the next. Exchange passing greetings with Celestia, fly from place to place by myself, see Celestia rush past me to her first job of the day, go to bed.
The only ones awake are the night guards, but they’re not much company. If I speak to them they stand stiff at attention and answer questions with utmost courtesy. They don’t say much of anything back, though, and I can’t have any real conversation with them. I try dream-walking from time to time, but it’s just not the same. It’s not like really having someone to talk to.
This evening I’m going to talk with Celestia. I’ll get up early to make sure there’s plenty of time before she goes to bed. I’ll tell her... something. I don’t know. I can’t put what I’m feeling into words. It’s just this tight, painful feeling that comes more and more often now. But... I think that if we just had some time to sit together and really talk together maybe I’ll be able to tell her how I feel. I remember when we were younger, and if I wasn’t feeling good about things we would talk about it until I felt better. She would listen and make me laugh, and then she would tell me things that bothered her so I could make her laugh in turn.
I’m going to talk to her. This evening.
I wake up very early. It’s still late afternoon. I go to search for her right away, but she’s in a meeting. I can hear irritating voices of demanding nobles through the door, and Celestia replies in a clear, even tone. I know that voice. That’s the voice she uses when she’s just about at the end of her patience, but she’s determined to keep things polite and going smoothly.
This isn’t a good time to interrupt.
I go to the small dining room and order some food. Besides something for me I order some fresh fruit and cake that I know Celestia likes. I also send one of the servants to wait for the meeting to get out and tell her I want to see her.
I wait in the dining room for over an hour before she comes. I’ve nibbled a little, but mostly I’ve waited, hoping we could eat together. She pushes her way through the door, looking worn out.
“Yes, Luna, did you want something?”
“I heard your meeting. It sounded like it was going pretty roughly, so I got a treat for you.” With my magic I offer up the plate of fruit and cake.
“Oh, that looks marvelous. Thank you, Luna. A little pick-me-up is just what I needed after all that whining and demanding.”
“What was that all about?”
“Border disputes. There’s a little stretch of land in between two properties. When the boundaries were drawn it wasn’t included in either lot, but it’s not big enough to be a property of its own. Now both sides are claiming that it’s theirs.”
“Why not just split the land down the middle?”
“That would be the sensible thing to do, don’t you think? Split it evenly so they each get the same amount. But no, neither one is willing to concede to the other. It took forever to get them to agree to split the land at all. When they finally did agree to split it that just made things worse. Now they’re arguing about how it should be split. Drawing a line down the middle is completely unacceptable to either one. They’re ready to fight tooth and hoof over who gets each individual rock and tree.”
“I know it wouldn’t be very diplomatic, but it sounds like they could both use a swift kick in the hindquarters.”
She laughs. “I’m seriously tempted, but I don’t think it would be a good idea.”
It’s nice to see her loosen up a bit. Whenever I’ve seen her lately she’s been like one big ball of stress.
“Hey, Celestia, there’s something I’ve been wanting to talk about.”
“Yes, what is it?”
“Well, lately I... I’ve-"
I’m interrupted by a knock at the door, and a secretary comes in.
“I beg your pardon, Princess Celestia, but the ambassador is waiting for you.”
“Oh, horse apples, I forgot about that! I’m sorry, Luna, but I’ve got to go.”
“Wait, I... we’re not finished with our meal.”
“I’m sorry, but I’ve really got to go. Look, why don’t you meet me in the private reading room after I’m done with the ambassador? We can talk more then.”
That tight, frustrated feeling twists up inside me again, but it’s like there’s a blockage in my throat and I can’t force out the words I want to say.
“Okay.”