With dinner served and shared, Silver rose and excused herself. The moment she was gone, the others shared glances.
Luna spoke first, "Are you certain we cannot try my way?"
Night pointed at Cadance. "Cadance has Silver's trust, a powerful thing. I think Silver will believe and at least try anything she proposes, so we should let her try to get through."
Luna scowled, partially directed at Celestia. "We once had her full trust as well."
Twilight clopped her hooves. "We have her trust too, don't we?"
Night sighed softly. "Twilight... You ripped her... Don't you remember?"
Twilight had the humility to look sheepish as it dawned on her how they had clashed. "Oh yeah... But what about you?"
Night sagged. "I spied on her, for Celestia. She figured it out."
Cadance frowned delicately. "I hadn't known there was such friction. She seemed quite loving of both of you, despite any past misgivings."
Twilight raised a hoof. "She forgives, but I don't think she forgets very easily. She loves my scholarly side. She adores even being a part of my science, but I'm not sure she'll ever forget when I forgot about her feelings and did... that. She'll strap herself to a table for me, but some part of her mind is wondering if that time will be the time I..."
Night wrapped a leg around Twilight and hugged her gently. "And it won't be. We've learned from our mistakes."
Elsewhere, Silver emerged from the restroom to spot someone in the dark. "Hello?"
They came forward. It was David. Silver was confused a moment, the memory of him buried too close to the recent to make a quick recollection, but he seemed to recognize her. "You're prettier than you gave yourself credit for."
There it was! "Oh! Other me. Hello. Are you well?"
David chuckled softly. "Better than you. I heard you died?"
"I got better," said Silver in a faux English voice. Both burst into a bit of a giggle. "I've wanted to use that joke properly forever. Say, did your father introduce you to Python?"
David nodded. "Sure did. Most of our past is in sync. So, welcome back to the living, and womanhood? How's that treating you?"
Silver looked back at herself. "I feel lovely, physically. I... They insist I'm missing something, mentally. It's really kind of bothersome. I mean... It's just not fun to be told you're broke that way. How can you even measure that for yourself?"
David seemed to understand. He reached for her and gently pet over her head, stroking her ears. The affection was accepted with a little purr. "I know what you mean. It is rough, but we have friends, right? Better than before, right?"
Silver smiled brightly. "You're right. We do have friends, and that makes a big difference... I should trust them, to show me what's wrong, and how to be better."
"Say." David stroked along her back with slow motions of his right hand. "How did you die anyway? You're a damn powerful alicorn, and talented too. What happened?"
Silver shook herself out. She liked being close to another, but his touches... They roused old memories. Did he want something? Was he signalling something? She felt like she should know, but it refused to come to her. Why were his fingers working around her tail like that? That w-- She jumped as he touched a sensitive portion just under her tail. "David!"
David drew a hand away, only to stroke back upwards along her. "We could die anytime, if you could go. What chance do I have?"
Silver struggled to put the pieces together. "Are you... Are we? David, answer me clearly, are you trying to suggest something, if so, please say it as bluntly as possible. I don't understand."
David looked a little put off by the request at first. He cupped her cheeks and rubbed slowly through the fur there. "I'm offering to make love to you, my pony self."
Silver gave a numb nod. Of course. He wanted what everpony else wanted. Why... Why did everypony want it? They shouldn't even consider having foals! They were brothers, at least, possibly closer. "David, why?"
He tickled her under her chin and rose her eyes to look at him. "You snatched me away from everything. You were a big, strong, friendly... Loving figure. You promised me everything, and I followed you. I don't mind being away so much, but only if I was running to something."
Silver licked over her lips. She didn't want to hurt this soul that seemed to be asking her to help it, but she felt nothing towards him but a gentle affection. It wasn't even the powerful surge she felt around Twilight or her other mates. But maybe... Maybe... "Would you show me what everypony wants so much?"
He looked confused at the question. "How do you mean?"
Silver turned away from him and raised her tail. "What everypony has gone on about. Show me."
He lost his momentum. "You mean you don't... know?" Silver shook her head back at him. "I'm not here to rape you, Silver."
"You're not raping if I say you can. Go ahead and show me why I should care." She lifted her tail higher. "Go on."
David squirmed. What she was offering was quite tempting, but he also gained full awareness of what the problem was, and he didnt want to take advantage of her, no matter how tempting. He set his hands on her hips and kneaded into her cutie mark even as he used his thumbs to push down her tail. "No. We can do it later, after you feel better."
Silver was almost certain being touched that way should be exciting on some level. She should be swooning and all the more ready for the stallion to do things to her, or disgusted, or angry, or... or anything... Anything but nothing... All she felt was agitation that she still didn't understand. She felt fury towards David well up a moment and she lifted him into the air with her magic, only to set him down gently. "Thank you... Please... It would probably be better if you found a mare that felt like you did." Or felt anything. Silver slipped away, escaping the encounter, only to be grabbed by the tail.
David gently pulled her back and she backpedaled rather than kick him or toss him aside. "Silver, I'm sorry I made you uncomfortable. I hope you feel better soon."
Silver smiled gently. "That's very nice, but I'm not sure if I ever will or not. Please, you don't have to wait for me, besides..." She rolled a hoof. "My old self was apparently involved with everypony in the kingdom and then some. Please... Your own mare would give you the time you deserve." She suddenly paused. "Oh, or stallion. Either is fine."
David released her. For a moment, Silver wished he hadn't. Why couldn't he just show her, break through the ice and force her to see what everyone else saw so easily? They parted ways without further words. Alas, David was not the only stallion destined to run into her that evening. Rough Tumble patrolled diligently, and closed with her on seeing her. "Silver?"
Silver perked her ears and smiled. "Tumble! It's nice to see you."
Rough rolled his ears back. "I did what you asked... I guarded them. They're safe..."
Silver looked confused a moment. "Everypony is safe, thank you." She leaned in to touch her nose to his cheek, but he recoiled. "What's wrong?"
Rough Tumble looked away with shame. "I was supposed to guard you."
Silver frowned. "None of that! I am my own pony. What happens to me is my fault. I won't let anypony else take credit, or fault, for it. Now why are you hiding from me? I... am I misremembering?"
"What do you remember?" Tumble perked an ear at her. "I heard you forgot a lot of things..."
Silver scowled a moment. "I remember you said you wanted to be with me, even if I was a mare, that you were attracted... to me, not stallions or mares. Is this not true any longer?"
Tumble looked lost a moment, then settled on his haunches. "Do you want to be together?"
Silver settled on her own haunches and reached out a hoof. "Hug?" He accepted, and they embraced gently. "You are part of my past, and current, Rough Tumble..."
Silver found her lips being pressed against, and a tongue invading. Rough pushed her back and he slid right up on top of her. He was doing it! She felt terrifying and excited, not for any... Not the way she was sure she should be. Would she feel anything, or would it be as dry as brushing her teeth? She steeled herself. She'd let him, and wouldn't speak a word of her dysfunction. He'd do it the way stallions should, and she'd know. She'd know if she was simply dead that way.
Rough rubbed his belly against hers and she pressed back, imitating him even though she didn't understand why they made the gestures they did. She felt him prodding her. She could feel the texture of it, and she wondered at it, and the feel of his body, but it just... It didn't excite her. He was inside. She spread her wings and wrapped it around him. She felt terrified she would be caught, that he'd notice how little she felt of him, and then he'd stop. She didn't want him to stop. "Harder," she spoke. "Go on, harder." She wasn't moaning it out, or pleading as someone being rutted should be, she was requesting. "Faster." She wanted to feel! She wanted to feel something!
He was going faster. He didn't notice! He was panting for breath. He was working so hard. Thump. Thump. Thump. It hurt a little to have him going so fast against her. Where was the pleasure? Where was the niceness that other ponies obviously went after? Thump. Thump. Thump. All she felt was building tenderness. He was moving so fast and powerfully that he was bruising her. That couldn't be right... "Slower..." He obediently slowed, and began to drag against her, pushing against her in purposeful and slow motions. He still hadn't noticed. He hadn't rejected her as the dead corpse she was. She felt tears starting to escape. She didn't want to be a corpse. Was that all she was to her lovers? Why couldn't she feel anything?
Oh, it was done... He flopped across her, panting and snorting for breath. It was done, and she was left feeling as dead as ever. She hugged Rough Tumble tightly to herself, sniffling softly.
"Are you alright?" He kissed her cheek. "I did it right, didn't I?"
Oh no! Silver squeezed him tighter. "You did great! You did... You did everything..." She had barely moved. She didn't know which way to go, or when to go, or how to feel. "Thank you, Tumble... Thank you." She kissed him briefly on the lips. "Thank you."
Rough nuzzled gently with her and pushed against her. She faked a little noise and he seemed to buy it. He was utterly fooled by her, and when he drew from her, he was blushing and looking proud. "I... I'm glad we're still friends, I mean... close friends... Even if you are a mare."
Silver internally sighed. Mare or stallion, she was an unfeeling monster. "Me too... Maybe..." She slid up to her hooves. "We should get some sleep." She kissed him goodnight, and trotted away, feeling nothing but the lingering soreness from the rough mating she'd invited on herself. What would it take to cure herself?
One thing she knew clearly, burning through her. She wouldn't be a victim. She would find the answer! Fate wouldn't control her.