//------------------------------// // Tear // Story: Torn Fabric // by Storm butt //------------------------------// “Maybe this is some freaky coincidence.” Hoity Toity mumbled under his breath. “No, I don’t believe that is the case,” Fancy Pants sighed and rested his face onto his hoof. He gazed out past his dining room table and into the light of Celestia’s morning sun. Just moments ago he had been wondering he he should simply eat egg whites or be daring and commit to a few slices of hay bacon strips. But no, here he was in his dining room with an unsettling tightness in his chest along with a poisonous taste on his tongue. A once intoxicating scent of coffee still lingered in the air, though he knew that perhaps it was a bit too bitter to truly enjoy right now. “Exactly how many places did you visit before you finally found a copy of this?” Fancy Pants let his horn glow before he grabbed ahold of the newspaper on the table with his magical grasp. He held it before Hoity Toity’s eyes, though the pony glanced away and bit gently on his lips. Under his dark purple sunglasses Fancy could see that his eyes truly refused to meet his own. Fancy Pants twisted his mouth, wondering just how easily he was able to get across his growing frustration in his maroon robe and untidied mane. “Three,” Hoity Toity spit out at last when Fancy Pants narrowed his eyes. “It’s just a popular news day, I think. I mean who doesn’t want a good morning paper on a… uh… tuesday…” Hoity Toity put his hoof to his lip and frowned. “But don’t worry darling, it’s going to be alright. I’ve had much worse printed about me.” “Don’t I know it,” Fancy Pants rolled his eyes and finally stood up from the cushion on the floor. He rubbed at his eye trying to force the sensation of exhaustion out of his system. “Did you come barging in here at the crack of dawn just to show me this? I thought you were with that…” Fancy Pants waved his hoof as if trying to grasp the name. “What did you call him? Hunk?” “Let’s not discuss my sexual life and how unbelievably unsatisfying a stallion of his size and mass turned out to be, shall we?” Hoity Toity shook his head and looked away. He covered his cheek as if he were hiding a blush, though by the way he kept looking to Fancy Pants under those purple shades the older stallion got the distinct feeling that he thrived on being questioned further. Fancy Pants chose to ignore his curiosity and simply roll his eyes. “Let us instead discuss how…” Hoity Toity reached up his hoof and snatched away the newspaper from Fancy Pants’ grasp and despite the older unicorn’s best attempts he was unable to keep it steady. Hoity, without missing a single beat, opened up to the third page and lifted the paper in the air. “Ah-ha! I knew it!” “You already saw it!” Fancy Pants nearly growled, letting his emotions get the best of him for just a moment. He didn’t need much more than a look at the large printed picture under the words “GOSSIP CORNER” in an overly large glamorified style of font, to see the picture that had spoiled his plans for a pleasant morning. Both him and Prince Blueblood were on the picture, though the fact that Fancy Pants was atop Prince Blueblood with a hoof grasping half of his unbuttoned shirt and lips pressed to his chest in the midst of weeds and grass under the shade of a tree spoiled any kind of warmth Fancy Pants usually felt upon the sight of Blueblood. The worst part however, was simply the large red… ball… in Prince Blueblood’s mouth. “Oh I know,” Hoity Toity sang and took a step away from Fancy Pants to avoid his snatching hoof and still stare at the picture. “How ever did you convince your little ‘Sweetheart’ to lay in such a dirty spot for you to fondle him? And do you just happen to keep a gag on you at all times? So many missed opportunities those nights we used to get drunk in our prime, dirty old man.” “Not now, Hoity.” Fancy Pants felt heat hit his cheeks, but more importantly his horn. He was tired of this pointless dancing around the dining table. He grabbed Hoity’s tail, tightly, and pulled on it with nearly all of his magical might. With nothing more than a painfully girlish yelp from the gossiping stallion the earth pony was pulled back several feet, forced to let go of the newspaper simply not to stumble and lose his footing on Fancy’s tiled floor. Fancy snatched up the paper with ease and instantly crumbled it up. If he was any less sound of mind he would have shoved it in his mouth in an attempt to dispose the evidence. “You are not a very GENTLE STALLION!” Hoity Toity stomped his hoof against the ground and began rubbing the base of his tail. Fancy Pants ignored his frustration and simply pressed the crumbled paper to his forehead and fell to sit on the floor. “This is a mess,” He mumbled, shaking his head back and forth. He hit his hoof to his head once, twice, three times, mumbling “Stupid, stupid, stupid!” Again and again. “Honestly, like I said, I’ve had much worse published about me in the paper.” Hoity Toity sighed and shook his head. He seemed to get over the pain rather quickly once he realized that Fancy Pants wasn’t paying any attention to him. “Honestly I can’t believe you’re getting this worked up about it. How many times have you two been in the paper this year alone?” “I’m not worried about me, Hoity,” Fancy Pants shook his head and slowly got to his hooves. He paced the kitchen slowly and held up the crumbled paper before his eyes with his magic. When he got to a garbage bin he let it fall slowly, careful not to let his current emotions get the best of him with unneeded violence to his appliances. He stared into the trash for a moment before taking in a slow, deep breath. “You don’t give me enough credit, you know. I have thicker skin than you about this stuff.” “I’m aware,” Hoity Toity frowned and peered to Fancy by lowering his glasses. “You walk around in a maroon robe every morning? I’d get thick skin real fast too if I did that.” “Thank you, Hoity,” Fancy Pants chuckled. Though he meant it to sound sarcastic, when it came out he couldn’t help but laugh. He placed a hoof to his forehead and felt sweat begin to gather. His mane was nothing short of a disastrous frizzled mess. “I’m just glad the birthday-boy got more action than me, at the very least,” Hoity Toity smirked at Fancy Pants. He was already at Fancy Pants’ counter and pouring himself a fresh mug of coffee. Fancy Pants couldn’t help but notice under all his annoyance that he was using his favorite mug, a white one with cat whispers painted on one of the sides. “How was the three weeks of having a eleven year age difference? Did you feel like slightly less of a ginormous perv?” “I felt young and energized like never before, thank you,” Fancy Pants rolled his eyes and walked back to the table to seat himself down and begin rubbing at his temples. “Would you pour me a glass too, Hoity?” “Are you positive you don’t want a glass of wine?” Hoity Toity chuckled, though Fancy could hear the cupboard open behind him. “At this hour?” Fancy giggled in reply but still shook his head. “I’d kill for one, actually. But no, I’m apparently making an unexpected visit on my day off to make sure my boyfriend hasn’t wasted half the kingdom’s money on newspapers.” “Oh come now, he’s only done that… twice…” Hoity Toity put his hoof to his lips again in thought. “Well it is early. Good day for the kingdom to have a bonfire I suppose. Want me to go round up about fifty of them?” “That’s not very funny.” Fancy Pants watched a mug of coffee be set down before him. He snatched up up with little hesitation and gulped down three swallows. It was unbelievably bitter on his tongue, as he expected. Regardless, he managed to drink half the mug without taking a breath. Hoity sipped at his mug slowly and stared over the table at Fancy Pants once he took his seat. The two met eyes for a moment and remained in silence, but it was Hoity who began coughing in his hoof as if waiting for Fancy to continue. “Do you have something to s-” “So, ballgags?” Hoity Toity raised his brow. Fancy Pants rubbed his temple in reponse and sighed. “We are not having this discussion. Not now or ever.” Fancy Pants got up from his seat and turned away from Hoity Toity before gulping down the rest of his coffee. He walked to the sink and began to rinse out the cup, hoping the subject would drop faster than he could finish. Unfortunately, he was speaking to Hoity Toity. “Oh, come now, Fancy,” Hoity Toity nearly bounced off of his cushion to Fancy Pants’ side. He placed a hoof delicatly on Fancy’s shoulder and attempted to lean forward and look deeply into his eyes by lowering his shades. “I have a million little dirty secrets to spill if you let me know.” “Is there a single pony in your little circle who doesn’t know at least half of those dirty million secrets?” Fancy Pants asked with a shake of his head. He lifted a dish towel with his magic and began to dry off his mug and turn once again away from Hoity Toity. “I don’t intend to share why Blueblood may or may not have been wearing a ballgag last night!” “Do you know why I had a bite mark bruise on my hind leg for a month last year?” Hoity Toity questioned with a sense of lingering tease on the end of his words. “A royal guard had a hoof fetish and you wouldn’t stop talking about taste and he got hungry,” Fancy Pants replied without missing a beat. “No cigar, Hoity.” “Damn,” Hoity Toity growled. “You never let me have any fun.” “Blueblood is your friend too now, Hoity. Honestly I don’t see why you’re so intent on embarrassing him. He’s not like me, he doesn’t handle it well.” Fancy Pants looked over his shoulder to throw Hoity Toity a bit of a glare. “I can safely assure you I put up much better front about this sort of business in front of him. If I were to get upset as I am now I don’t know what the stress would do to him.” “I’m just saying I’m very invested in the ever-growing relationship of two of my dear friends,” Hoity Toity chuckled and shook his head back and forth. “I’ve heard some rumors from the guards that the walls of the castle are haunted when you visit, is that true?” “Have I mentioned how horrible I think your habit of sleeping with guards is, Hoity?” Fancy Pants shook his head and felt his horn glow with warmth once more. He removed his maroon robe slowly and walked to the window to stare out into the streets of Canterlot. “Look, Hoity, I share a lot of information with you… and apparently all of Canterlot… but some things are simply private.” “Er… I believe you mean all of Equestria,” Hoity Toity spoke up, for the first time a bit of hesitation in his tone. “I’m afraid you’ve made it to the big leagues, darling. Sorry to say it.” “Excuse me?” Fancy Pants felt his mane whip when his head did so. Hoity Toity tried seemed to shrink and step aside with speed unknown to ponies when Fancy came charging back through the kitchen to the garbage bin and ripped it open. He pulled out the newspaper and began uncrumpling it with his magic. The title wasn’t “Canterlot Locals”, not by a long shot. It was “Equestria Worldly.” “Er…If it helps, I’m a bit jealous of you.” Hoity Toity chuckled, though it was forced and horribly awkward. A silence followed and hung in the air, both stallions too afraid to move much less speak. After what felt like an eternity “Oh dear.” ---------------------------------------------------- “Well it’s not a very appealing shot, I’ll give them that,” Shining Armor mumbled. Prince Blueblood could only focus on three things. The fact that apparently humiliating him was not front page news according to the newspaper Shining Armor read, the loud, sharp whistle of tea boiling over fire in the background, and the idea that Shining Armor was critiquing his borderline, public porn. “Stop staring at it!” Prince Blueblood barked, venom spewing from his words when he stamped his hoof onto the checkerboard pattern floor. “Dear, I think Blueblood has been embarrassed enough for one day. I don’t think he needs his best friend staring at Fancy Pants… enjoying him...” Cadence sighed loudly and wiped her brow with a cloth held by her magic. The whistling of the tea kettle ceased when Cadence lifted it from the burner. Even in the confinement in this tiny overly pink room he was still able to stare out the towering window beside the poster bed to his left and bite at his lip, wondering just how many ponies were now staring at… well, him. The ability to stare out at what sometimes felt like the entire world made him a bit dizzy to the point he had to sit down on the spot and cover his face with his hooves, a flush overtaking him. “Why in Equestria would you phrase it like that?” Blueblood shook his head and let out an audible groan, once again stamping his hoof to the floor. Frustration was overtaking him faster than he could process. “Look is there anybody I can legally deport from Canterlot or am I just wasting my precious time here?” “S-Sorry, Blue,” Shining Armor folded the newspaper quickly and avoided Blueblood’s gaze. His cheeks were obviously pink, painfully so. “Press is press… Hehe, there was a picture of Cadence and I last summer that had me wearing this pink bu-” “Tea’s ready!” Princess Cadence spoke up. Shining Armor seemed to freeze, cheeks growing pinker when realization hit him on what he almost said. “Shining likes blueberry annnnd, Blue likes honey and milk with his!” “I’m on a diet, actually,” Blueblood grumbled. He wanted his stare to penetrate the great kingdom of Canterlot and shred it to a million pieces. He heard Cadence walk over to him and saw her face penetrate his vision, a gentle smile on her face. “I think you deserve it, Sweetie,” She nodded her head and reached down her hoof to touch his. She squeezed gently before pulling on it and encouraging him to his hooves. Blueblood felt numb, but he obliged her request and sulked to the table where a mug meant for him awaited. “Come sit with us and we’ll talk about it.” “Must we?” Blueblood whined the response out. It seemed to take effort and strength beyond his belief simply to ask that simple question. He slumped down to the cushion and brought his tail around to cuddle it close to his chest. He wanted to curl up in a nice hot bed and hide underneath his blankets until the world forgot about him, but he supposed tea would have to suffice. “So I’m guessing we can skip the question with how things are going with Fancy Pa-AH!” Shining Armor’s question was interrupted by a loud, audible stomp from Cadence onto his tail, which he quickly grabbed for and held close to his body to mirror Blueblood. “Shh!” Cadence hissed, holding a hoof up to her lips. “No teasing! Honestly you’re just as thickheaded as when you were a teenager sometimes! At least hug him before saying that!” “Please don’t,” Blueblood shook his head. “I think I’ve had enough of ponies staring at me be touched by another stallion for one day.” “S-Sorry, Dear,” Shining’s ears fell against his head for a brief moment before he looked to Blueblood and smiled a silent apology. Blueblood stared at the steam rise from his milky tea and bit down on his tongue. It was difficult to think straight, admittedly. How he ever let Fancy Pants lay him down somewhere so… dirty was beyond him. He let his hair become muddied by dirt and entangled in grass just for a few moments of pleasure. He thought for a moment, and deduced that it was no better than earth ponies on a farm who couldn’t wait to get inside to do their duty, so to speak. “So,” Shining Armor was the first one who dared to break the silence. Cadence glared to him, and he tightened the hold on his tail. “I uh… I…” He brought his hoof to the back of his head and bit down on his lip before scratching at his mane. “Blue uh… how was the party?” “Aside from Hoity, Fluer, and Fancy Pants it was horribly loud and full of ponies I didn’t know, if I can be so choleric,” Blueblood grumbled under his breath. “Which would have been just fine with me, if I wasn’t so horribly foolish in permitting Fancy Pants to drink past three glasses of wine and get tipsy and flirty with me in such a public setting and get me all riled up!” Cadence seemed to sense that Blueblood was about to hit the table, for he watched all three glasses of tea rise the moment he did, only to be set back down when he hugged both arms together and let out a loud, annoyed whinny. “Honestly that dirty old man could make me cluck like a chicken in public if he so wished. How could I have let him convince me to do something so degrading so close to that many hungry journalists?” Blueblood was breathing fast, clutching his chest even when he felt his eyes sting. “Oh dear Celestia my father would have my head.” “Your father would have had your head the moment you told him you wanted to date a stallion, Blue,” Shining Armor shrugged his shoulders and took up his mug of tea, blowing at the brim to push away the steam before taking a sip. “Look don’t talk about him now, that only upsets you.” “Oh, right, wouldn’t want to be upset now would we?” Blueblood shrugged and laughed an awfully dry laugh. He snatched up his tea and gulped at it with a trembling hoof. He ignored the burn on his tongue and drank it regardless, lowering it only when he needed to gasp for air. “I think I might have a heart attack.” “You’re being over dramatic,” Shining Armor shook his head. “Bite me,” Prince Blueblood growled. If he could have he would have stamped on Shining Armor’s tail himself. “I think it’s a bit romantic,” Cadence giggled. Both Shining Armor and Blueblood looked to her, and she giggled again. She covered her mouth with her hoof and then cleared her throat before straightening her back. “Don’t you think so, Shiny? They’re still so passionate and in love after all this time! I know my first boyfriend didn’t last nearly as long as Blue’s, not nearly as enticing!” “Please stop discussing my sex life,” Blueblood hit his head to the table near instantly and groaned again. “Sorry,” Cadence giggled again. “But I’m glad you two are so happy! It makes my heart all bubbly and warm thinking about it!” She held her hooves to her chest and smiled at Blueblood. “How about you, Shining?” “I saw my best friend wear a ball gag, Cady,” Shining Armor stated blankly. Cadence frowned at that finally and looked down to her hooves, her lips twisting into a frown. The more she thought about it the steadily less romantic it sounded. “I mean… they certainly seemed to be enjoying themselves, if that’s what you mean.” “Please burn that image from your memories,” Blueblood sipped at the burning tea once more. Cadence was right, he very well did deserve the extra calories today of all days. He hit his hoof down to the table and snatched up the newspaper and held it to his chest. “In fact can we burn this, as well?” “I highly doubt that’s going to stop anypony from seeing it, deary,” Cadence frowned and shook her head. “I’m sorry.” There was a pause, and Blueblood tightened his muscles around the newspaper before biting his lip. He looked down to the checkerboard floor underneath him and took in a deep breath, trying to force his mind to calm down. “Can we burn the sixty other papers in my room…?” He let that question sit in the air a moment before he dared to look at the other two. Cadence’s eyes were wide, and Shining Armor had his mouth open as if he struggled to come up with anything to say. “Blue… how…” Shining Armor shook his head slowly. He placed his tea down and slowly lowered his face into his hooves. “How in Equestria did you buy sixty of them? It’s not even nine in the morning!” “I was in the garden this morning and saw one be delivered,” Blueblood mumbled softly and sipped at his tea. “I… I happened to see a mail-pegasus fly in and picked up the paper when he was delivering mail to Celestia. H-He always comes to the castle first and when I saw the headline with me I…” He tightened the muscles in his arms and felt his eyes sting. Just how foolish was he being, he thought. “I-I’m sorry, he and his partner were very confused even after I paid for them… t-they’re in my room.” “Oh, deary,” Cadence got up to her hooves and fluttered quickly over to Blueblood and pressed a hoof to his back before rubbing in circles. He began to swish his tail anxiously and bite harder on his lower lip. “You were blinded by emotions, that’s fine… an expensive fine, but fine!” Cadence reassured again and again until Blueblood was forced to nod his head in response. His next breath was shaky. “It’s an Equestria paper… not a Canterlot. Meaning it’s going to go all around Equestria and there’s hardly a thing I can do to stop it,” Blueblood shook his head back and forth. Shining was frowning, looking down into his barely sipped tea and silent in his own thoughts. “It doesn’t matter if I buy sixty or six-hundred, everypony’s going to see it. At least when they claimed Fancy paid me to sleep with him they didn’t have photographic proof!” Blueblood crumpled the paper in his hooves and tossed it aside. Shining glanced to it, but still didn’t say anything. He bit on the end of his hoof and took in a deep breath, listening to Blueblood let out an audible sniffle before attempting to muffle himself. “Blue… hey… we don’t think any less of you, buddy,” Shining assured. He leaned forward over the table and smiled gently, reaching out his hoof to press to Blueblood’s shoulder for a brief moment. “Oh please Shining, you and Cadence are the only ponies who should get it,” Blueblood snarled and growled the words, wondering if he could fight away his emotions with anger. “This could affect how everypony sees the castle, not just me. I-I’m the last of the pure royal bloodline and I’m just parading myself around like some kind of freak show! T-They’re going to make fun of my stupid animalistic desires and use it against Celestia for how she helped raise some s-slut!” Blueblood could feel his breath begin to pant in long, ragged breaths. His attempt to mask his emotions with anger failed, his eyes stinging again. His mouth felt dry when he thought about it, his chest tightening and heart aching. Cadence’s hoof rubbing his back didn’t offer him the comfort he desired. He bit down hard on the inside of his cheek and closed his eyes, fearful his tears would show. “Hey, Blue, don’t get like that,” Shining Armor got up from his seat and went to Blueblood’s side as well. Blueblood had the sudden urge to shrug off the hoof on his shoulder, but he fought it by tightening his muscles. “Fancy’s not gonna think that of you, right? People start rumors about Celestia and the royal family all the time. Most people are gonna think you’re… passionate, right?” “I highly doubt it.” Blueblood shook his head and finally shrugged off the two ponies when he squirmed to get to his hooves. “The ones who do will be a very silent majority, I believe. The others will just spread hideous rumors and… I’m feeling dizzy…” He places a hoof onto his head and turned away from his friends. “C’mon, Blue,” Shining Armor took another step forward. “We were gonna go out to lunch together, the three of us, remember?” He asked in a hopeful tone. “I know you love the fried egg salad that Iron Hoof has.” “I believe under the current circumstances you’ll both forgive me if I choose to stay home and… look at my pile of sixty one newspapers…” Blueblood shook his head and looked back to the two. There faces ranged from concerned to understanding to… somewhere in between. “Or a bit more realistically take a hot bath and soak for a bit. I do believe I’ve sweat enough to make farm ponies jealous this morning. It’s doing awful for my mane.” “We understand,” Cadence nodded her head. Shining Armor opened his mouth for a second, and then shut it. After several moments he nodded as well, though he wouldn’t meet his eyes with Blueblood’s for at least ten seconds. Even after several deep breaths Blueblood felt his chest continue to grow tighter. He looked back to the table and swallowed a lump in his throat. “Is there any more tea?” He questioned. ------------------------------------ The carriage ride to the castle was… awkward, to say the least. From the moment he stepped into the carriage the brown earth pony gave him strange looks, opening his mouth several times and looking to him at every stop as if he was just dying to ask something. No matter how much Fancy Pants wanted to believe the question was why on earth he chose to wear only a dress shirt and bow-tie out of his house without even fixing his mane, he knew it wasn’t true. He tried his best to pass the time by looking at his watch or staring at the scenery which had grown stagnant and dull the more time passed, but the trip was still agonizingly long. He saw a poor old stallion reading a newspaper at a turn right before a bridge, and wondered to himself if he had already seen the image. Fancy Pants knew his suspicions were confirmed the moment he was at the gate of the castle and fiddled through a bag of bits for the right amount to pay the stallion. The poor young pony could barely keep himself from squirming in place he fought so hard to avoid looking at the stallion. It was only when Fancy Pants counted out ten bits and put them all in the pony’s bag did the stallion feel brave enough to ask any questions. “You’re the pony who…” Needless to say, the stallion didn’t get a tip. Fancy Pants of course replied with a rather convincing “No” to the question he was given, but he still felt a chill go down his spin when he wondered just how many times he would face that question in the upcoming week. If his birthday party wasn’t a good enough reminder to his creep closer to middle age the fact that this kind of publicity was beginning to bother him was a sure sign. Perhaps ten years ago when he was still a young stallion he would have relished the idea of seducing a prince and having photographical evidence engrained on a few thousand newspapers, if not a million, but more recently he had picked up this little habit that had done him wonders over the years that he liked to call “Caring for those you love.”. What was important was not how he managed to handle his feelings right now, but how well the other victim in the photo did. “Oh dear,” He found himself commenting halfway across the drawbridge to the castle. He was checking his watch when he realized just how early it was, and he was already exhausted. He had walked this path a million times, usually for much more enticing reasons than this, but this time it felt much longer. When his hooves hit grass he ignored the gaze of each and every royal guard. It never ceased to amaze him just how casually he could stroll through the castle without even the accompaniment of a guard in recent months. Many guard knew his name, some nodding to him and others even trying to strike small conversations. But today Fancy Pants didn’t feel very… chatty… The morning dew of the grass clung to his hooves when he passed through the garden and to the entranceway that led to the quickest route to Blueblood’s room. While still ignoring the look of any and all pony around him he trotted into the castle, not bothering to wipe his hooves on the bright red rug beneath him. Pink walls and purple flowers greeted him along with windows tall enough to make walls out of. Craftsman ship that would normally entice his senses and inspire him in the aspects of the castle seemed dulled today, soured even. During his walk he rolled the concept around in his mind, the concept that everypony in Equestria, at best a good percentage, would have clear visual images of some of both stallion’s most intimate moment burned into their brains the moment they wanted to check their horoscopes. The thought was unsettling and made Fancy Pants grumble. He had to get the feelings out of his system, he thought. If anypony needed him to be happy and positive right now, it was Blueblood. The closer he drew himself to Blueblood’s room and the more guards he passed the louder Fancy Pants felt his heart beat. He pressed his hoof down to his heart and felt in the pocket of his coat a key. He slipped it out slowly with his magic pulled it from his pocket. Five more stairs and he was standing in the tallest section of the tower, more accurately known as Blueblood’s home. Not a single door was in the hallway except Blueblood’s own. The outstretch of red carpet that Fancy trotted down quickly without being stopped was an all too apparently reminder of the fact that not a single guard was standing outside of Blueblood’s door. A good sign for privacy, but a bad one considering Blueblood would have had to order them away. “Shoot,” Fancy Pants mumbled. He took the key from his magical grasp and held it in his hoof. The key to Blueblood’s room… the first gift Blueblood had ever given to him. He held it tightly in his hoof and pressed it briefly to his lips. When he got to the door it seemed to simply stand as a wall, it’s intricate markings and designs flawless. He pressed his hoof to it, and knocked three times. “Sweetheart?” He called. There was no response. There was a time where Blueblood insisted that he come in without hesitation, that Blueblood would never not want to see him. Still, it seemed a bit rude to just barge into a locked room. And locked it was, Fancy forced to press his ear to the door and listen closely for sounds of life. He heard nothing. He sighed and slipped the key into the lock, turning it slowly before pushing the door open. The first thing he noticed was not the large poster bed or drawn curtains that stood two stories above his head on the opposite end of the room, no it was the three stacks of newspapers standing right in front of the doorway before him. The floor turned to purple tiles and Fancy Pants let himself in. It was awfully dark. He had to squint past his monocle just to see properly, the only light coming from a door beside the large bed bigger than a king’s. The door was wide open, and Fancy Pants realized that he could hear water running. Fancy Pants closed the door behind him gently. The last thing he wanted to do was scare Blueblood. By the signs of the papers he purchased, he must already be on edge. Fancy Pants fought his frown, trying to force himself to give even the smallest smile. “Sweetheart?” He called hesitantly while he trotted towards the light. “Blueblood?” He called again. When he listened closely he could hear the sound of water shifting, and then a sudden stop as if one of the pipes in the walls had been cut off from flowing. “Fancy Pants?” Blueblood questioned. Fancy Pants felt his heart give a single beat. That was all he needed to smile, the sound of Blueblood calling his name. He picked up his speed and found himself in the doorway to the bathroom. He stared straight ahead at the impossibly large, snow white bathtub that was only half full. Blueblood stood up, water dripping from his legs and belly. Fancy looked to the floor and saw a bow-tie and dress shirt as well as a vest thrown about with little care. “I see you stole my favorite part of being with you, Sweetheart. When I get to undress you.” He smiled and looked to Blueblood. Blueblood opened his mouth, and Fancy expected some sort of retort, a blush even. However, all Blueblood could manage was a simple. “P-Please come here,” He nearly begged. The sound of his voice gave Fancy Pants a sudden aching pain deep in his chest. He didn’t hesitate to remove his monocle and pull at his bow-tie while he walked towards the tub. Past the jewel encrusted sink and over the fuzzy red carpet he was halfway out of his dress shirt when he took his first step into the tub. Blueblood was patient, and perhaps that was what made Fancy feel the worst. He waited until Fancy had properly removed all of his clothing before even walking forward and hugging him. He showed no emotion in this time other than a bite of his lip. He didn’t bother going for the kiss, simply taking the moment to cling to Fancy. His weight was heavy, so Fancy sat down in the warm, shallow water with him. Blueblood didn’t have anything to say, he didn’t even whimper. He simply clung desperately to Fancy and tightened his hug further when Fancy lifted his own forelegs. “Sorry I’m late,” Fancy Pants whispered into his ear. Blueblood buried his face in Fancy’s chest and clung tighter. Only then did he feel the slightest of a tremble from Blueblood, and only when Fancy thought he couldn’t squeeze any tighter did he pull himself away for just a moment. When he looked into Blueblood’s eyes he felt his breath stop in his throat. There in the shallow tub did he see Blueblood’s eyes, puffy and red. “Fancy… I… I thought awful things about you,” He smiled, but it seemed to hurt him to do so. Fancy lifted a wet hoof and pushed aside his mane to press his lips gently to his lover’s cheek. “I called you a stupid dirty old man to Shining… I called you a horny ass, too. I can’t believe we did something like that.” “You’re surprisingly accurate with your accusations,” Fancy Pants replied. He smirked and pressed his lips down to the end of Blueblood’s nose. It was wet, and not from bath water. “I’d blame you for making me a dirty old man if I wasn’t a bit more self aware, Sweetheart.” “Y-Yeah, that,” Blueblood chuckled again. He pressed his lips to Fancy’s own briefly. He lowered his forelegs to wrap around Fancy’s chest and hold him tightly. “I questioned Shining if we could d-deport somepony.” “Or throw them in the dungeon,” Fancy Pants smirked and touched his muzzle to Blueblood’s neck. “Barbaric, but fitting. But you know… you never did tell me Happy Birthday last night? I was a hurt before I remembered how muffled you were at the time.” “I was a bit… muffled,” Blueblood mumbled. He paused for a moment, as did Fancy. Despite knowing it was coming, the older unicorn still yelped when his belly was pinched at. “You’re quite awful at making me feel better.” “Oh I think I’m quite good at it!” Fancy Pants replied. In this moment he decided to sit up and push Blueblood to the other end of the tub so that he was now on top of the other stallion. “You know I hate to see my little boy-toy cry. Is that what they’re calling you these days?” “Dear Celestia never call me that again.” Blueblood covered his face with both his hooves and groaned audibly. “Or I’ll call you a sugar daddy or something vile next time I see a reporter.” “Some pretty big threats from a boy-toy.” Fancy pressed his lips down to Blueblood’s own. He could feel a giggle forcibly suppressed under Blueblood’s lips. When they split there was a moment a silence, a moment where the two crouched in the shallow water and hesitated. The silence began to feel heavy, and so Fancy Pants took it upon himself to shatter it. The last thing he wanted was to be the direct cause of those puffy red eyes before him, but he knew it had to be brought up. “Do you want to talk about it?” Fancy Pants asked, quietly. He pressed his hoof to Blueblood’s chest and felt water drip from it and down Blueblood’s chest. “I can’t imagine how you must feel, sweetheart. I’ve always had thick skin. I know you’re not used to this kind of stress from the media in the past year. Are you…?” “Fancy can we,” Blueblood said while shaking his head, interrupting Fancy Pants. “Can we not talk about it right now… I feel much better since you got here. Please just… let’s forget about it for a bit. I-I know you’re worried but I just really want to be with you right now and not think about it.” Fancy stroked his hoof down Blueblood’s cheek and nodded his head. With a kiss to his lover’s lips the deal was sealed, and with his magic he turned the knob to let more water run from the faucet into the tub. “You do entice me a lot with your flowery field scent, Sweetheart,” Fancy Pants giggled. “I know it’s hard to resist me when I’m in the tub with you like this.” “Oh, right, big tubby wet crude of a man makes my mouth water,” Blueblood poked at Fancy’s belly and Fancy in reply smirked devilishly. “You’re lucky I love you.” “I love you too, Sweetheart,” Fancy Pants replied. He could forget the articles for a bit, if only for the sake of Blueblood.