Silver wandered into the kitchen with restless energy and found Spike and Shei in there. She smiled at the both of them. "Room for one more?"
Spike looked over and blinked softly. Shei's reaction was less reserved. "Is that you, Silver Stars?" She paused only a brief instantly. "Are you truly alive?"
Silver nodded. "I feel alive. Care to test?" She sat on her haunches and offered a hoof. Shei closed the distance and they hugged gently. "Sorry for leaving you alone lately. I've been... What have I been doing?" She frowned gently. "Either way, we're friends. You know you can bother me any time, right?"
Shei recoiled. "We are not friends." Silver looked confused. "I don't mean it that way. We are more than friends. You are my master. You own me."
Spike raised a scaled finger. "I'm pretty sure owning ponies isn't allowed in Equestria."
Silver nodded towards Spike. "I can't be your master. Do I need to be?" Shei sank, looking lost. "Isn't being friends enough?" Shei kept lowering, flopping out on her belly. "I'm a mare anyway. I'd be a mistress if anything, which I'm not."
Shei pushed up to her haunches. "Forgive me, this is... all so sudden. Do you not love me anymore?"
Silver searched within herself. "I care for you deeply, and... I know I did poorly by you. It was my action that stole your sister away from you, and I can't ever truly repay that."
Shei reached over and prodded Silver in the chest. "I knew you had become somewhat distant, but this... Have you lost all the fire you once held for me?"
Silver frowned in thought. Did she have fire for Shei? She didn't feel that... "I want to be your friend."
"You mentioned that!" squeaked out Shei in a hysterical note. She hopped to her hooves and turned away. "That is all that I am, a friend of my sister's..." She clenched her teeth and stomped on her forehooves a moment, unable to even speak. "No... it's not fair. I suppose... I need to go speak to my aunt." She brushed past Silver and fled the kitchen.
Silver watched her go with a sad expression before turning to Spike. "Did I forget something? Were we about to go on a date?" Spike shook his head cluelessly. "She... She wants to be my lover."
Spike colored quickly. "That's my cue to vamoose!" He fled before the love talking got any deeper.
Silver was left alone to ponder. She didn't feel passion towards Shei. She cared for her, deeply, terribly. She wanted Shei to be happy, but she felt no urge to do sexual things with her... Who did she feel attracted to? She turned her mind to Twilight. She remembered being stirred easily by visions of the alicorn. Of her brilliance of mind, and the look of her fur. Even the curves of her... Nothing. Nothing at all. Silver felt love, but it had no physical aspect. She felt no desire to tackle Twilight to the ground and show her passion, just to maybe share a nuzzle, sit side-by-side. Perhaps they could read together, or play with the foals.
What about Rough Tumble? He wasn't scary in her mind anymore. Perhaps she was more straight than she was before. She specifically conjured images of Rough sliding onto her back, hugging her and moving to breed her. The thoughts made her blush, but she didn't grow warm. She didn't feel... anything. Friendship, kinship. She wanted to be near Rough Tumble, but she had no desire to breed with him, or anypony else.
She went through all her close ponies. Night Watch, Fast Change, even Trixie, her adopted mother. They were all fine ponies, but she had no flame for them, or anyone. She had no flame... Was she broken? Now that the thought had been conjured, she couldn't help playing with it in her mind. She felt certain she should have some amount of desire, but it wasn't there. Just friendship. The ponies she felt the strongest emotions towards were her foals, but that was a different kind of love. She felt she would protect them at any cost, and try her best to raise them well, surrounded by joy. There was no sexuality in that. There was no sexuality in anything.
"Silver?"
Silver looked up to see Night Watch propped against the inside of the door frame. She looked... awful. She was wearing that odd armor of hers, but Silver could clearly see she was drawn and thin. She was tired, no, exhausted, no... There had to be a stronger word to describe how utterly spent she appeared. "Silver..." She reached out a shaking hoof towards Silver, tears streaming as she smiled.
Silver rushed for her and gathered her up. "Night Watch, what have you been doing? My dear first wife, please, sit." Night didn't resist as she drew her along slowly to the dining table and sat her down. "Rest. I'm preparing something to eat, and you're going to eat it." Silver turned away from her. "If you feel the urge to sleep while I'm working, please, don't resist it. I'll wake you up the moment it's done, I swear."
Night sagged against the table, but her eyes were on Silver. "I can't sleep right now... It worked! You're... Tell me you're still you."
Silver nodded firmly. "Of course I'm me. And this 'me' can see you're starving. No more moving. Just sleeping and eating. What have you been doing?" She closed to nip softly at one of Night's tufted ears, only to feel a few hairs come out into her mouth. She recoiled in worry. "Please, we have to get something into you."
Night gave a weak nod against the table and finally allowed her eyes to drift shut. "I'll rest, if it makes you feel better, Silver." Despite the nonchalant words, Night passed out almost instantly. Silver gently pet across her thin mane before moving for the kitchen, deciding a soup would be best for the situation.
As she worked, hoofsteps approached. She wondered if Night had awakened. No, it was Rarity. "Hello, darling. My, I forgot how striking you were." Rarity had a friendly smile. "I really should be getting home. I trust everything is in hoof?"
Silver nodded towards her. "Everypony is sleeping or fine." She glanced away before returning her gaze at Rarity. "What happened?"
Rarity perked an ear. "You don't know? Oh, I suppose you wouldn't... Why, we revived you, of course. Whatever else would we do for Twilight's stallion, though I suppose you're not much of a stallion now."
Silver gave a slow nod. "I was a stallion, just before?" Rarity nodded. "Was I a handsome one?"
Rarity tittered. "Oh my, what a question! Why, I should say you were a striking image. You tempted many a mare to share time with you. Do you not recall it at all?"
Silver held up a hoof. "I swear. Sorry if these questions bother you. Did we?"
Rarity snorted softly. "I should think not. You may have been a prince, but you couldn't be my prince, Silver Stars. My prince would only have room for one mare, and that mare would be me. No, I'm afraid you didn't qualify."
Silver nodded her head slowly. So she wasn't romantic with Rarity, good to know. She didn't feel any attraction to the unicorn, even as, intellectually, she knew Rarity was pretty and worked hard to keep herself that way. "Thank you. I think I forgot a few things in the shuffle, and I'm trying to piece them back together."
Rarity raised a hoof to Silver's cheek and rubbed over it. "If you were a stallion when you asked that, I would have slapped you. Welcome back, darling, and I wish you a speedy recovery, for both your and Twilight's sake." She turned and trotted off, leaving a still-bewildered Silver.
With a finished pot of soup, Silver walked slowly back into the dining room with a bowl and spoon held in her magic. She slid it close to Night Watch, feeling hesitant to stir her, but she promised... "Night... You should eat."
Night roused with a start, jerking up to her haunches and looking around with wide eyes before she calmed. "Silver... You weren't a dream."
Silver smiled gently. "I'm right here." She slid the bowl towards Night. "Please, eat up. How long did it take to bring me back?"
Night sniffed at it gently. "It smells delicious, but I have no--" Silver popped a spoonful of nutritious soup into Night's snout and held it there until it was swallowed, then another spoon was gathered quickly. "Silver! You wouldn't dare." She lifted the spoon in her magic, bringing it to Night's snout. Night sighed softly and opened her mouth, allowing the spoon access. Despite her lack of appetite, she swallowed each time her snout was filled. "For you, Silver... How do you feel?"
Silver set the empty bowl aside just in time for Night to suddenly make a sick noise. She was about to vomit. Silver wrapped her magic around Night and reached into her, somehow stroking her insides, petting her from within and calming her wildly agitated system. Night squirmed in discomfort for a moment before she sagged, the urge to let loose her meal fading. "Thanks... It's been... about a week."
Silver frowned. "And you stopped eating and drinking the entire time?" Night nodded. "Tell me you at least drunk water?" Night looked away guiltily. "How are... I shouldn't ask that. I'm just glad you're mostly alright, but you're not leaving my sight until we get you fixed." Silver leaned in and kissed her cheek. "Alright?"
Night smiled gently. "When did you develop such a maternal side? It's kind of cute on you."
Silver tilted her head. "Am I not..." How did she phrase it. "I'm trying to find myself right now."
Night perked an ear. "You were always caring, but it was more... You were always a bit of a stallion, even when you were doting. I feel like I've somehow gained a new mother."
Silver frowned delicately. "Is it bothering you? Night... Maybe you can explain something for me. Before, when I was a stallion." She tried to imagine having all the stallion bits jostling down there, but it all felt academic. "Were we active?"
Night blinked. "We ran, and flew. Neither of us were terribly lazy, if that's what you mean?"
Silver licked over her lips slowly. "Not precisely. I meant, did we, you know... Did we breed? I mean, I know we must have at least once, or we wouldn't have a foal."
Night looked perplexed. "Any time you could squeeze me into your busy schedule of mares, and a stallion. They called you 'stud of the land', and you kind of lived up to it. You took the title and ran with it. I think you liked it."
Silver flicked her ears back. She tried to remember it, but it wasn't there. Stud of the land? She couldn't even conjure these feelings for her closest loves... She used to just hop on random mares and go at them? What sort of pony was she? What sort of pony had she become?