//------------------------------// // 9 Bar-room Blitz // Story: The Queen is Dead // by Meep the Changeling //------------------------------// David - 19th of Megan '15 EoH - Noon I spun before the glass even hit the ground. That wasn’t out of any skill on my end, that was out of pure blind panic. The inn exploded into chaos, a thing any real soldier knows isn’t just a movie thing. The most natural response to danger in the universe is to run. Twelve guys in fucking articulated plate. If ever there was a time to transform into Usain Bolt, this was it. One new, but valued, friend screaming her head off in terror. That made the decision for me. The only running I would do would be towards the enemy. The griffons stepped forwards amid the chaos, confused due to the sudden overturning of tables, and the sea of fleeing people. I ripped my cloak off with one hand, and drew my knife with the other. I had one shot, not to win, but to buy Jade her life. With luck, that whole ‘Army of One’ bullshit would work for a change. I had a heartbeat to take stock of the situation. We were in a corner, straight line from the door to the back wall. They were arranged in a half circle, covering the door and windows, and the stairs. We had a sea of civilians, overturned tables, and scattered flatware between us and them. The Griffon’s armor was articulated plate, joints covered almost completely. These were likely elite troops. The enemy was serious. On the upside their helmets had very large eye slits, and the closest griffon hadn’t spotted us yet. I had a shot. First rule of combat, nothing must register on an emotional level. Cool head. Logical plan. Step one, distract target. I wheeled around, grabbed a bottle from a nearby table, spun, and threw it towards a griffon at random. The sound of shattering glass accompanied a metallic thud. Step two, move to and unbalance target. I pushed off against the floor, launching into the fastest sprint I could manage, shoulder dropped squarely facing the griffon’s left side. Adrenaline dulled the crunching pain of the impact as I rammed into my target. A heartbeat later I kicked out with one leg, sweeping his talons away, the initial impact causing him to stagger to the side. Step three, get target onto the ground. My free hand seized the griffon’s left front leg. I pulled, his leg came with me, and gravity did it’s job, dropping the griffon to the ground with the sound of an anvil falling. Step four, kill. My hand left his arm, grabbed his beak like a vice, and yanked his head back. My knife plunged down in an overhead swing, shrieking as it scraped along his helmet’s eye slit, squelching as it scraped along bone. He thrashed in my grip for a heartbeat, and became meat. Step five, take advantage of psychological warfare. I ripped my knife free and swept it up into a saber grip. “You want me? Here I am, and here I will die! Oorah!” I shouted, making sure my ears lay flat, and taking care to stand atop their dead comrade. The griffon closest to the door reared up, unslung a crossbow from his back and leveled it at me. Second rule of combat, ranged beats melee. The griffon's talons tightened on the trigger, I’d bought less time than I thought I would. I felt I had time for some last words. “Ah, crapbask-” Suddenly, an overturned trestle table shot from the ground like a blue-glowing rocket, slamming edge first into the griffon, smashing his bow, then him, and then a section of wall, all of which blasted out into the street! “Hehe! I turned the tables!” Azur giggled happily from somewhere off to my right. The remaining ten griffons slowly started to spread out. One of them, a taller one with a red stripe painted along the top of his helmet started to bark orders. “Dustwing, you an yours take the unicorn. My crew, the dog. Everygriff else, squash that bug!” Azur moved up to where I could see him out of the corner of my eye. Good, units work better together. Even better the civvies had managed to get the hell out of the inn by now, and I couldn't see Jade. Hopefully she was safe. “Where’s Jade?” I asked, hoping Azur could confirm her having booked it. “No idea.” Azur replied. “So, you got this or… ?” “How the hell would I have this?” I demanded. Two griffons began to rush forwards, both of them had large blades welded to their armor’s talons. I stepped to the side, grabbed the edge of a table and heaved it over, dragging it between myself and- “Essen sie stock kraken, arschloch!” Azur shouted, voice echoing slightly. With a flare of blue light the floorboards ripped themselves up from the floor, grabbed the two griffons like an octopus's tentacles, and ripped them to the ground amid a shriek of wood. “Well, you did get that one pretty easily.” Azur commented, his voice sounding more than a little strained. “You hit?” I asked, keeping an eye on the still in combat griffons who were now almost completely surrounding us. “No breakfast.” Azur grunted, horn still glowing. The animated floorboards creaked again, and with a sound like someone snapping a metal ruler the griffon’s armor crumpled inwards. Pained screams filling the room immediately. No way they were dead, but a crushed rib and/or spine would keep them out of it. “I’ll need a minute…” He added as the floorboards grew still. I had another heartbeat to examine the situation. Jade was gone. Good. I had a thick table in front of me, but enemies were now surrounding me. That cut their approach down to one hundred and eighty degrees, but they could still fire weapons over the table. Bad. I had a pretty fucking terrifying wizard with me. Good. He needed a minute, because apparently unicorn magic runs on calories. Fuck. A griffon shot forwards before I could plan. His talons ripped grooves in the floor, mid stride he drew a short blade from his side, sprinting on three legs, blade aiming towards my chest. I jumped back. The blade sliced the air where I had been, instantly reversed direction and cut a line in my shirt. I swept my blade down, blocking his blade with a loud clash of steel on steel. He threw himself forwards, slamming into me and taking me to the ground. Stars exploded in my eyes as my head to hit the floorboards. A half second later my left shoulder burned in agony. Blinking my vision clear, I noticed the griffon had buried his beak into my shoulder. My knife arm was pinned between my chest and his barrel. I couldn’t do a damn thing has he snapped his head back and slammed his beak down again, ripping into my shoulder, and widening the wound. Biting my lip, I drew my legs up under me, pushed my feet against his gut and tried to lever him off me. It was no good. The armor made him too heavy. Pecked to death by an overgrown seagull, not what I had expected on my tombstone. A loud metallic ping exploded just above my head. My ears ringing, I looked up to see Jade’s shortsword stabbed into the Griffon’s helmet, a green aura engulfing it’s handle. The griffon slumped, dead weight. I pushed as hard as I could, barely managing to tip his armored carcass to the side. As I got back to my feat, I saw Azur locked in blade on magical energy construct blade combat with another griffon. I staggered forwards to lend a hand, left arm and shoulder somehow both numb and burning. I made it two steps before a piercing whistle made me reflexively snap my head around. Just outside one of the broken windows, a light red and blue unicorn mare stood, and she had my gun in her magical grip. “David! Catch!” Oh shit, that was Jade. She threw the gun towards me, followed a second later by the bag I had stashed it in. I twisted, reached, caught Boomstick, and missed the bag entirely. Shit! There went the ammo. I didn’t even think, I dove after the bag, slid across the glass covered floor, grabbed the bag’s strap, pulled it out from under a griffon who was rushing at me, rolled to the side, sprang back up and dove behind a table. My fingers flew as I snapped the breech open, ripped four shells out of the bag, slammed them into the barrels, and snapped my weapon shut. If this didn’t work, I wouldn’t get a chance to redesign her. I jumped back up, noticed a burning sensation in my chest from broken glass that had gotten stuck in me, leveled Boomstick at the griffon who was now standing over Azur, and pulled the trigger. The deafening boom and black/blue streak of light was not the twelve gauge thump I knew, loved, and had expected. Boomstick’s warcry sounded like a 700 nitro express, if it was mad as hell, but her kick was like a bloody .22 short round! The griffon lay a full three feet from where he had been, bits of iron shrapnel from the exit wound made the wall across from him look like I had unloaded birdshot into it. Suddenly my wounds didn’t hurt so much. I owed that smith a hug. The griffons took a step back, then one of them shouted, “Wait, those things just have the one shot! Charge!” I turned Boomstick’s valley sights onto him and fired a second round. Her roar was much softer this time, closer to the appropriate report. The griffon slumped down slowly, a hole through his breastplate. “Yeah, okay.” I said in a generally happy tone. The shoe was on the other foot now! Unfortunately, there were two more shells, and six of them. It was time for a bluff, and that gleeful 14 year old gun nut in my brain politely informed me that I would never have the opportunity to use a movie quote in context ever again. “Alright you primitive featherbags, listen up.” I said leveling the gun at a third griffon. “See this? This is my Boomstick! If you don’t want to join your friends as wall coverings, you’re going to just stand there and let my friends and I leave, and then keep standing here till we’re long gone. Ya got that?” The six remaining griffons hesitated for a minute, three began to talk quietly together, but one pulled an axe off his belt and started to walk forwards, “There’s no way he can shoot all of us before we rip his guts out!” I turned, aimed, and pulled the trigger. Instantly the entire room was filled with a flash of blue-black light, my ears hummed as if a grenade had gone off, and I was pretty sure I smelled fire! By the time I could see again, it also looked like a grenade had gone off, splintered floorboards, shards of metal, and griffon parts littered the floor. “This is not a safe weapon!” I said to myself urgently. “This is so not a safe weapon!” I made a mental note to not use Boomstick again until I knew what the fuck it did and when it did it. I needed another ranged solution. And to strangle that smith for making beauty unfucking usable. One of the remaining griffons gave me a quick nod and sat down, “That sounds like the best bucking idea I’ve heard today, sir!” “Das wurde awesome!” Azur exclaimed, beaming me that huge pony grin. Unfortunately, my brain was a bit shaken up and I couldn’t remember my German. “Ich glaube, ich bin verliebt!” “Yep. Great plan. In fact, I think we’re all unconscious!” Another said, deciding to take a seat. I noticed a large crossbow on one of the griffon’s backs. I carefully flipped Boomstick towards him, “You, give me your crossbow.” The griffon almost threw the bow at me. As it landed at my feet I noticed it was solid steel and brass, and had a rotating drum magazine on it. “Is… is that a semi-auto crossbow?” I asked, completely perplexed. “Yes, sir! Twelve round drum. Lever cocking.” The Griffon answered quickly. “Why the hell didn’t you open with that?” I asked, even more perplexed. Azur rolled his eyes, “Why didn’t you open with that Faust-damned karmic weapon?” I picked up the crossbow, and holding my gun on the griffons, backed up towards one of the windows, picking my cloak up off the ground on the way. “Karmic weapon?” I asked curiously, grateful that the blond unicorn knew what the damn thing did. “S-seriously?” Azur asked stopping to give me a baffled look. “Just got it. Smith didn’t say what it did.” I answered as I felt my back bump against the window frame. Azur hopped through the window, looking around for a moment before saying. “Clear.” I quickly stepped through the empty frame and made a beeline for my cart, which Jade was sitting on top of, in her red unicorn shape. With her normal Changeling tail. She was totally right apparently, that did take practice. “So, karmic weapon. It does as much damage to a creature as it has unrepentanted evil deeds to their name.” Azur explained. “Where are we going?” So that's what it did… that was almost unusable then, seeing as how on some bastards it would make them just fucking go off like a fucking claymore! “Away from here for now. We can work out a direction once we are safe.” I said before giving it a few moments of thought. “... Hop up on the cart. You can come with us if you like.” “Are you just saying that because I have nice flanks?” Azur asked playfully. I facepalmed and groaned. “No, because you’re a fucking wizard and we need you. Get in the cart, we have to deass the area!” Azur eardrooped, putting on the saddest, most hurt expression I had seen to date. It wasn’t even a faked expression, it had all the hallmarks of being the real deal. I’d actually hurt his feelings. Why the fuck would that have hurt his feelings? Shit… “I’ll do playful banter later, okay? Right now I don’t want to die!” I said gently, pointing back into the tavern. “They aren't a threat, you have that… gun?” Azur said as he pulled himself up into the back of the cart to sit beside Jade. “Did you not see it just make that griffon explode?” Jade asked Azur with a raised eyebrow. “You probably shouldn’t use that thing close to someone else…” Azur giggled and shook his head, “Oh please! It’s not that dangerous, just put up a shield spell!” Jade and I gave him a few seconds of silence, during which grabbed the handles of my cart and set off at a jog, ignoring my burning shoulder. Distance first, tend wounds second. “Oh… Wait… Can you guys cast spells?” Azur asked timidly. “Nope.” Jade answered. “Very simple ones. With a lot of concentration and effort.” I grunted. “Ah… Right. Then, as you said, let’s 'deass the area'. ‘Cuz I’m out of calories…” He admitted in a tone which made me assume he was blushing. “Wait, so unicorn magic is based on caloric intake?” I asked urgently. “Yes. We need to get the energy from somewhere, right?” he answered. I smiled, “Awesome! When we make camp, and I get my shoulder treated, I’m going to brew up a bunch of ‘mana potions’ and you’ll help me work out some basic spellcraft. Sound good?” “Sounds great! Oh, um, no dandelion. Allergic.” Azur informed. “No problem,” I said putting as much speed into pulling the cart as I could. Fortunately the fight had made people seek shelter. Even so the streets were narrow, hard to navigate, and I was really damn certain that the Griffon’s backup would be on our asses any second now. “I’m going to shut up and pull. We’ll talk later.” I informed, then put my all of my attention on getting the nope train to steam out of the station. David - 19th of Megan '15 EoH - Evening After we left Applewood behind us, Azur said we should head directly south. Apparently that was almost a straight shot to Capsan, the closest port that he knew about. I had been wandering about the inland area for the five years I had been here, and Jade had never left her hive before, so it was great to have someone with a general sense of where things were with us. Azur was a real ball of energy too. The further away from Applewood we got, the happier he became. He was an adult who kept their childish energy and playfulness while growing up. His not even flinching from that battle proved that much to me. It took a rare sort of person to face death with a grin like that. It would have creeped me the hell out, if he wasn't a wizard. After asking him about it, turns out he could have teleported out of danger if he had to. I guess knowing you can get out of any situation anytime you like would change your attitude on things. The fact that he stuck with me for that skirmish even though he could have escaped told me everything I needed to know about that girly Aryan pony. I was able to keep moving till mid evening. That’s when my shoulder gave out, so that’s when we made camp. To my delight, Jade immediately began practicing her cuts on a nearby tree, and to my astonishment, while I stitched up my shoulder, Azur stitched up my shirt. In better quality than the person who originally made it for me. I could barely tell it had been damaged. He’d even redone the old repairs to the side from the fight a few days ago. Unfortunately, patching myself up took all of my remaining energy. When I was done I had just enough energy to pull out my bedroll and get settled in for some sleep. As I drifted off I overheard Jade and Azur talking about a spellbook that Jade’s mother had given her before she fled. It sounded important, and like a big deal, but sleep beckoned, and my weary body eagerly followed her call. Today had been full of enough excitement. Whatever thing those two were excited about could wait till morning. Or maybe noon, my shoulder was telling me I had earned the right to sleep in.