The next day was bright and sunny, and Raindrops heard birds twittering as she flew out of her window and over her backyard before landing in the streets behind her house. Cheerilee and Trixie were already there, and Raindrops waved to them when she landed. "We ready?"
Cheerilee nodded briskly. "I looked up the relevant statutes last night. Mayor Scrolls has the authority to order a non-resident out of Ponyville, especially if she's been documented harassing locals. This should only take a few minutes."
"Good." Raindrops began to walk towards the Mayor's office. "Then let's go."
They walked for a few minutes before Raindrops saw the boulder-like Juggernaut step out of the stairwell next to Noteworthy's shop and trot towards them. Her sword was at her side and she had a large saddlebag dangling over her back. "Raindrops! I--"
"No." Raindrops looked away from her. "Not a chance."
"But--"
Trixie reared onto her back hooves. "Excuse me!" the showmare protested. "But the Honest and Honorable Raindrops has made it quite clear that she will not agree to duel you, no matter how often you ask her!" She smirked. "There is no argument you can make, no threat you can impose, no price you can pay, that will change her mind!"
Juggernaut was silent for a few moments before tilting her head. "No price?"
"None." Raindrops rolled her eyes. "I'm not going to fight you even if you offer me two super-duper fancy wing armor things. Or even if you stay here for a month and a half. So you can just--"
Juggernaut's face brightened. "Then I offer twenty thousand bits for duel!" she said.
All three mares stared at her. "Twenty thousand?" gasped Trixie. "Where in Equestria did you get that kind of money?"
Juggernaut's smile gleamed. "I strongest warrior in Equestria--Archduke Fisher say so himself! And he pay lot of money so nopony could buy me away." She shifted her saddlebag and opened it, revealing that it was full of silver bits. "That not enough? I pay thirty thousand if Raindrops duel me."
Trixie opened her mouth to say something else, but Raindrops spoke first. "Seriously? You think you can pay me to fight you?" She tried not to think about how that money could help remodel her family's old, cramped house, or enable her to have special horseshoes commissioned to allow Snails to walk on clouds like the rest of his family, or allow her to take a few months off from work and away from Rainbow Dash. "No deal! Not for thirty thousand or any other price!"
She sped up, with Trixie and Cheerilee racing to keep pace with her and Juggernaut following more sedately. They reached City Hall in moments and Raindrops stopped just short of the door when she heard voices from inside. "Scrolls is inside," she announced. "Good. You might as well get on the train now, Juggernaut, because--"
The door slammed open, bonking against Raindrops' muzzle, and Mayor Scrolls stormed out. Applejack and Carrot Top exited behind her, both talking at once. "I know I ain't much with fancy mathematics," said the apple farmer, "but Big Mac's graphs should make it real clear. We can do more with the land--"
"The Farmer's Union is trying to expand, we could use--"
"And let's not forget the Trust has all the equipment needed to clear that field--"
"The Union has more than enough pony power to--"
"ENOUGH!" screamed Scrolls. Everypony stared at her, even Juggernaut, as the mayor glared at both farmers. "I should not need to remind either of you," she continued in a slow, heavy voice, "What happened the last time you two feuded. Your respective farms were almost destroyed due to lack of capital and collapse of your customer base, respectively." She trotted around the farmers so her back was to the entrance of City Hall. "I am astounded that you two would be so eager to court disaster again."
"Ain't no disaster!" protested Applejack. "We--"
"You fully intend to sue if I rule against you," said Mayor Scrolls. "Regardless of the undeniable fact you would risk a consumer backlash even worse than the last one. And you," she turned to Carrot Top. "Are also considering suing if I rule for Applejack, though you would surely bankrupt yourself if you lost the suit."
Nopony spoke for several seconds. Eventually, Applejack said, "Mayor Scrolls, with all due respect, I really don't see what business any of this is of yours. All you need to do is rule--"
"It is my business because I am the mayor of this town!" snapped Scrolls. "Both of your farms are vitally important to Ponyville. You do understand this, I trust?"
The farmers looked at each other. "Of course," said Carrot Top. "I know my farm contributes a lot to the Union and to Ponyville in general. And Applejack's does too."
"It's an honor an' a privilege to feed Ponyville," Applejack added. "That's the code I live by. An' I'm sure Carrot Top here feels the same way."
Mayor Scrolls nodded. "Then I trust you see why I have a vested interest in stopping either of you from wrecking your respective businesses because of this ridiculous rivalry you two have." She took a breath. "And furthermore, I consider you both my friends. On a personal level, I don't want either of your farms to fail. And so I implore both of you to work this out without lawsuits." She moved to the door of City Hall. "I am legally obligated to render a decision by noon tomorrow. I will fulfill my duties. But I would very much appreciate if you would construct some kind of compromise before then, in order to obviate my ruling and spare both of you--plus this entire village--what we all know would be a ruinous lawsuit for all concerned."
Carrot Top looked like she wanted to protest more, but Trixie, Cheerilee, and Raindrops walked up behind her, and Cheerilee embraced her in a hug. "Now that she mentions it, a compromise wouldn't be that bad, would it?" asked the magenta mare. "Then you'd both get more than you have now." She smiled at both of them. "And neither of you would be run out of town. That's the best case, isn't it?"
Both farmers eyed each other for a long moment before Carrot Top looked away, and Applejack followed suit a moment later. "We'll try," said the apple farmer. "No promises, but we'll give it a shot."
"Fine." Carrot Top stepped forwards and reluctantly bumped hooves with Applejack.
"That is all I ask." Mayor Scrolls nodded briskly. "If there is nothing else, I suggest you get to it. I have a meeting and--"
Raindrops flew up and then landed in front of the farmers. "Wait," she said. "We've got a problem for you too." She gestured at Juggernaut, who had quietly watched the farmers arguing without saying anything. "That mare is from out of town, and she's been doing nothing but bothering me since she showed up yesterday. We want her gone."
Everypony turned to look at Juggernaut, who approached Mayor Scrolls. "I cause no trouble," she said. "I break no law. All I do is ask Raindrops to duel me. She is knight; I have right to do this."
"Only if you're also a knight," said Cheerilee in a prim tone.
"I am!" Juggernaut smiled. "Minister of War have power to knight one pony. He choose me." She turned back to Scrolls. "So I can ask for duel as many times as I want."
"You asked me five or six times yesterday alone!" snapped Raindrops. "You followed me around! You broke into my house!"
"Your family ask me inside." Juggernaut shrugged. "It legal. And I want duel."
Applejack hesitated, as if reluctant to get involved, but then said, "Juggernaut also made my little sister powerful dizzy after givin' her a horsey-back ride, Mayor."
"She say she want ride," protested Juggernaut. "She say she in hurry and I need go fast. Her friend with coat like ripe orange and mane like bruised grape also say she want go fast. So I run. How I know Ponyville foals more fragile than Rushian foals?"
Scrolls sighed. "Applejack," she said. "It sounds like the incident with Apple Bloom was just an unfortunate misunderstanding. Was Apple Bloom injured?"
Applejack shook her head. "No, she walked it off."
"I see. And Raindrops, has this pony done anything illegal whatsoever?"
Raindrops clenched her jaw. "Not exactly," she had to admit. "But... she's annoying!"
"I can't throw a pony out of town just because she's annoying." Scrolls was silent for a few moments before turning to Juggernaut. "And what do you plan to do while in town, anyways?"
"Ask Raindrops for duel until she say 'da,'" said Juggernaut. "And buy things." She opened her saddlebag again, and Scrolls' eyes glittered at the sight of the bits. "Buy many things. Pay much sales tax."
"Seriously?" asked Trixie. "You can barely speak Equestrian but you know what sales tax is?"
Raindrops took a step forwards until she was standing directly in front of Mayor Scrolls. "You can't be serious about her. She has no business here!"
"By definition, if she wants to buy things, she does in fact have business here." Scrolls turned to go back inside. "And even if she didn't, as I said, I cannot and will not ban a pony from Ponyville just for invoking her legal right to challenge a Knight of the Realm to a duel. I'm sorry, but your request to evict this pony is denied."
She stepped into City Hall and shut the door behind her, leaving the Elements to exchange worried glances while Juggernaut beamed.
#
"Thanks for trying to help?" ventured Trixie to Applejack.
The five mares had retreated to Trixie's home and holed up in the office Raindrops knew she would be late for work, but seeing as how her assignment was just to follow Juggernaut around, she had a feeling work was going to come to her. "Yeah," she managed. "Thanks, AJ."
"Ain't nothin'." Applejack frowned. "Even if the thing with little Bloom was an accident, the way she's botherin' you ain't right. You let me know if she's givin' you more trouble; I can ask Big Mac to try knockin' some sense into her like she did those darned mafia ponies that tried to foalnap Dinky."
"I can get some farmhands from the Union to help too," said Carrot Top. "If we have to. But in the meantime..."
Applejack nodded. "Guess we owe it to the mayor to try workin' this field thing out. Wanna talk at my place? Big Mac'll brew up some mighty tasty apple tea, an' he's got all the facts an' figures 'bout that field ready too."
Carrot Top looked unenthusiastic. "I guess so. Unless you need more help with Juggernaut?" she asked the others.
Trixie shook her head. "We'll work it out. You two go negotiate."
When the farmers had left, Cheerilee rose. "I have to get to school soon," she said. "Trixie, how are your other plans for Juggernaut coming along?"
"I telegrammed Canterlot to see if Rushia has a new noble yet. If so, we can just ask him or her." Trixie thought for a moment. "Fisher had a son, Anatoleap Canterprov Fisher, who's supposed to be a pretty good guy. If he's the pick, we're fine. Otherwise, I'll just write Luna like I usually do when there's something I can't handle."
"So, your daily letter then?" Raindrops smiled, even though she knew it wasn't one of her better jokes.
"Hey! I write her once every few days at most. And only to ask for her help with really important problems, like late bourbon shipments." Trixie grinned and got up. "You can hang out here as long as you want, although I do technically have some work I'm supposed to do today so I can't really talk long."
Raindrops shook her head. "No, I'll go to work... which is, literally, following Juggernaut around." Raindrops sighed. "But don't worry. I'll try to last a few more hours without punching her."
"That's the spirit!" Trixie grinned. "And hey, feel free to help yourself to a bourbon or two if it'll help." She paused. "Nothing top shelf, of course, but--"
Raindrops grinned and threw a pillow at her. "I'm fine," she said. "See you later." She flew to the door, braced herself, and stepped outside.
"I challenge you to duel!" called Juggernaut from just beyond Trixie's fence.
The weathermare took a deep breath. A few more hours, she thought, And this'll be over.
#
As Raindrops expected, Juggernaut did little for the next few hours except wander through town, occasionally challenge her to a duel, and make a couple of purchases. When lunchtime rolled around she returned to Sugar Cube Corner and simply said, "I buy pies."
"How many pies?" asked Pinkie.
"One wagon of pies." Juggernaut took a double hoofful of bits and put it on the counter. "Plus one chocolate sundae."
Pinkie's eyes brightened. "Alright!" she chirped. "One wagon of pies and one sundae coming up!"
Raindrops scowled. She had followed Juggernaut inside, as per her 'follow Juggernaut everywhere' assignment, and was idly looking over the cakes. "Since when is 'wagon' a unit of measure?" she asked.
"Since Juggy showed up!" Pinkie Pie beamed. "She's a great pie-eater! Why, she could almost beat my record!"
Raindrops, who had seen Pinkie Pie consume enough sweets to paralyze an elephant without batting an eye, winced.
Juggernaut took the wagon of pies to the field by the schoolhouse, where the foals were all waiting for her. Raindrops frowned when she saw that many of them were wearing white. Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon had actual martial arts uniforms, but many of the other foals were wearing blankets, cloaks, and...
"Snails!" cried Raindrops when she saw her brother. "Is that my fluffy bathrobe?"
Snails, who was almost swallowed inside the voluminous robe, nodded. "Uh huh!" she said. "Before she left yesterday, Juggernaut said she'd do some training with us today! And everypony knows you wear white when you're training in martial arts!"
"But..." Raindrops saw mud and water dripping from the bottom of her favorite robe; Snails had evidently walked through some puddles while wearing it. "But--"
She was cut off by Juggernaut, who drew her sword. The foals squealed with joy and grabbed vaguely sword-shaped sticks. The unicorns held them with telekinesis while the other pony gripped them in their mouths. Juggernaut pointed hers up and then yelled, "First position!" She struck forwards, as did all the foals.
Raindrops choked as Snails stumbled on his giant robe, fell, and almost poked himself with his stick. "Cheerilee!" she called to the magenta mare, who was sitting on the stairs to the schoolhouse. "Do something!"
Cheerilee gave her a helpless look. "I tried," she said. "After school yesterday I told her to leave my students alone. But the PTA overruled me this morning and decided that foals should be offered 'martial arts training' by an expert during recess."
"But--but you're an expert!" protested Raindrops. "You're my teacher, for Luna's sake! You don't need her; you could do it!"
"Not according to the PTA." Cheerilee scowled. "Or at least Spoiled Rich, the PTA's president. Which I'm sure has nothing whatsoever to do with Juggernaut spending a ridiculous amount of money at the Rich family's Barnyard Bargains last night."
Juggernaut didn't seem to notice the argument. "Next position!" she called, slashing her sword out. It struck a boulder in just the right way to shatter it, and the foals cheered. "Strike, little ponies! Strike like disgruntled bear!"
The foals followed suit, a few tripping and poking each other, but most swinging their 'swords' successfully.
Raindrops cringed as Snips stabbed his stick into Raindrops' robe, ripping a gash in it. Choking back her anger, she forced herself to fly away.
#
"Um, Raindrops? I might have some bad news."
The weathermare turned to Trixie and felt a scowl creeping over her features. Her shift would end in minutes, and Juggernaut had gone into Heavy Roller's wagon shop to purchase a new pie wagon. Raindrops glanced at the mare through the window of the store, then turned back to Trixie. "What?"
The showmare weakly waved a telegram with her telekinesis. "The new Rushian noble wrote me back," she said. "And it's... not quite what we wanted. But it's not the end of the world! It just--"
Raindrops snatched the telegram and opened it. "Dear Representative Lulamoon. I have received your notice that a citizen of my province is annoying one of your friends. However, I do not feel it is an appropriate use of my power to force an Equestrian citizen to relocate herself simply because her presence is objectionable to a knight. As such, I will be taking no action. Sincerely, Archduchess Svelte Lord-Fisher." She scowled. "Who's Svelte? You said some guy named Anatoleap would be taking over!"
"Anatoleap is Fisher's son, but apparently they can't find him. He's probably in hiding with his dad. Svelte was Fisher's wife and the Representative of Stalliongrad. She's..." Trixie trailed off. "She's not a bad pony, but she's really cynical. Something really bad happened to her in Stalliongrad--I don't know the details, but I heard that's how she lost her horn--and when I talked to her a couple years ago, she more or less told me she thinks ponies are inherently corrupt. I don't think she's made a single friend in years." Trixie shuddered at the memory. "Anyways. She probably figured our request was just two ponies that Luna favors--us--asking one of our government contacts to get rid of a pony we personally find annoying, since that's how she sees the world."
Raindrops' mouth moved silently for a moment. "So now that Luna finally purged the corruption from the government, we've gone so far the other way that the nobles aren't doing useful things because they're worried it might be corrupt." She thumped her head against the window of Roller's shop. "Terrific."
"So I'll write Luna." Trixie carefully embraced Raindrops. "Trixie is your friend, remember. She'll solve this!"
"Hope so," Raindrops managed. "Because I'm getting tired of this, and if it doesn't stop soon..." She trailed off. She didn't need to explain what would happen if she lost control and just decked Juggernaut. She didn't need to. Being arrested for assault would be the very least of her problems.
"Maybe you should take a few days off," suggested Trixie. "Go out of town?"
Raindrops shook her head. "I'd have to take Snails with me, so that Juggernaut couldn't do something crazy like hold him hostage. And I don't want to worry him. He's been through a lot lately, and I just want him to be happy and have fun with his bugs. Not hide from some brute in a Trottingham or Hoofington hotel with--"
Juggernaut stepped out of the wagon shop with a heavy-duty wagon trailing behind her. "Raindrops!" the mare called. "You ready to duel now?"
Raindrops sighed and looked at Trixie. "Get Luna as soon as you can, okay?" she asked before flying into the air and heading home.
#
"Seventeen!" gasped Snails as he pushed himself off the ground. "Eighteen! Nineteen!"
Raindrops frowned as she flew into her backyard and saw her little brother doing push-ups. His beetle was in front of him, doing push-ups as well, albeit twice as quickly as Snails. As she watched, it raised a leg and clacked its mandibles, and Snails nodded. "Right. Gotta go faster!"
"Snails?" Raindrops flew down to his side. "What are you doing?"
The colt grinned when he saw her and then staggered to his shaking hooves. "Practicing!" he said. "Juggernaut said if we worked out like she did we would become big and strong!"
Raindrops gathered Snails into a hug. "Maybe I could exercise with you?" she offered. "I'm pretty tough myself." She grinned and flexed a wing.
"Really?" Snails beamed. "That'd be awesome! Then I might be ready by Saturday!"
The weathermare froze. "What's on Saturday?" she asked.
"Juggernaut agreed to do special training in the park with me. I asked if she could give me extra help this weekend and she said yes!" Snails's horn sparked and his eyes shone with excitement. "Isn't that awesome? I'll get to train with one of the most awesome fighters in Equestria for a whole day! I mean, she's not as awesome as you, but she's still pretty awesome! She chopped down that dead tree by Lily's shop with a single cut!"
Raindrops' heart pounded. If she agreed to this, Snails would be spending the whole day with Juggernaut, who could reveal her real purpose in town--to avenge her brother by beating Raindrops into the dirt--and horrify him. If she refused to allow him to go, Snails would know something was wrong anyway. Unless she could get Juggernaut out of town by then--which was looking less and less likely by the hour--Snails was going to suffer.
"Dropsie?" Snails frowned as he wriggled out of Raindrops' hug. "Is something wrong?"
Raindrops didn't trust herself to speak for several moments. Her thoughts were too full of visions of her strangling Juggernaut. "Snails," she eventually managed. "Could you go inside please? You need to wash up."
"But I'm not done getting strong yet!" Snails protested. "I..."
Raindrops gave him a long look, and his voice trailed off. The Hercules beetle jumped back into his mane as he slowly began to walk inside.
When he was gone, Raindrops punched a hoof into the ground, driving her leg down almost up to the knee. "Luna," she muttered to herself, "I know you're our princess, and I'm supposed to love and honor you, but I'm just saying--you'd better come through."
#
The sun had set by the time Raindrops returned to Trixie's house. She once again entered through the front door and reached the living room, where she heard a lively debate.
"...I know he's a jerk, but I'm just saying, that whole martial law thing was to protect us, right?" Lyra was saying. "If we can find him and tell him what Juggernaut's doing, wouldn't he try to call her off?"
"The Shadowbolts and Guards have been hunting him for over a week," said Cheerilee. "If they can't find him, I don't think we'll have any better luck."
"Then what about Greengrass?" ventured Ditzy. "Maybe he could run one of his 'games' on Juggernaut."
Trixie snorted. "Even if he wasn't a total scumbag, he lost all his influence, remember? He can't do anything."
Cheerilee brightened. "There's Baron Max. He worked with us in Canterlot. If we wrote him, maybe he could help."
"How, by bucking Juggernaut in the face?" asked Trixie. "I've heard that's how he solves most of his problems, but that's not really applicable here. And even if he did, Juggernaut would kick him back, and then Duchess Posey would send ten feet of snow to Ponyville for getting her coltfriend killed. We--" She turned slightly, and Raindrops' eyes met hers. "Raindrops! Hi!"
The weathermare's glare silenced her. "I'm guessing Luna's response wasn't good."
The other mares in the room all looked at each other before Trixie took a telegram off the table. "My faithful student... yadda yadda... I will of course intervene if you genuinely believe Juggernaut may assault Raindrops, or any other pony in Ponyville. However, if this is not the case, I would encourage you to continue searching for your own solution to this problem. I believe that you and your friends are more than capable of devising a method of removing this intruder from your town without violence." Trixie paused for a moment, but Ditzy nudged her, and she sighed and continued. "A noble of my Court is expected to be creative and resourceful, able to effectively deal with small problems in her province without requiring support of the crown. Please bear this in mind before you decide that Juggernaut is truly an insurmountable obstacle."
Nopony said anything for a long moment. Then Raindrops snapped, "In other words, because Trixie has political ambitions, Luna thinks we should be able to handle this without her. Except we can't. So Juggernaut's going to camp out in town forever."
"No." The showmare sighed. "Trixie will write back to Luna and inform her that we have tried everything and failed. Surely she will not think too much less of Trixie." She was silent for a few seconds. "And besides! What's a noble title when friends are suffering?"
"We'll support you," said Ditzy. "We have the Right of Approach."
"And we are kind of stopping Corona from taking over," added Lyra. "That's gotta be worth something! And--"
"No."
Everypony turned to look at Raindrops. The yellow-coated mare scowled but continued. "You're not sacrificing your political career over this. If Luna won't help, I'll find another way." She felt a wave of anger building inside her, rage that everything had failed and she once again had to protect herself and her brother from some thoughtless brute who didn't care who she hurt as long as she got what she wanted, but she managed to push it aside. "See you all tomorrow."
She made it to the front yard before Trixie caught up with her. "Raindrops! I--"
"I'm not mad at you," said Raindrops. A light rain was starting to fall, but Raindrops barely noticed as she walked on with Trixie following. "It's Juggernaut I'm mad at. Well, her and all the other ponies who apparently don't think this matters." Her eyes blazed. "My brother was frightened out of his mind in Canterlot. He was almost killed. Now I have to worry about him finding out this Juggernaut wants to beat me to a pulp!" She scowled. "How am I even supposed to tell him that this new pony he thinks is so awesome is actually here to knock my muzzle in? I can't--"
Something moved in the darkness besides her.
Trixie and Raindrops jumped back as a shadowy, bulky figure rose up. It had been so still that it had just seemed like a large lump at first, a broken-down wagon or pile of trash carelessly fallen out of a garbage cart, but when it moved, its bulk made it clear who it was. "You not tell Snails why I here?" Juggernaut asked. "You not want him know?"
"Hey!" Trixie flushed. "Why're you skulking around like that?"
Juggernaut ignored her. "My brother not stop hurting until we fight, Dame Raindrops. He not be at peace until I beat you." She stepped closer, shadows shifting around her body. "We will fight."
"Never." Raindrops felt her teeth grinding. "Not in a million years."
"Then, next time your brother leave house, I tell him why I here." There was no edge of cruelty in Juggernaut's tone; she sounded as if she were calmly describing a useful chess tactic, not something that could traumatize a foal. "You understand?"
Raindrops tensed, and only Trixie's legs suddenly wrapped around her middle stopped her from leaping at Juggernaut's face. The other mare just turned to go. "I see you tomorrow," she said, and left.
"Raindrops," whispered Trixie as she hugged the other mare. "Raindrops, stay calm. If you just hit her she can hit you back. Snails won't be happy if you wind up in the hospital--"
"I know!" shouted Raindrops. "I know, but apparently there's nothing I can do about it!" She struggled against Trixie's grip. "All I want is to protect him! Is that too much to ask?"
Trixie hugged her further. "Just don't do anything rash," she whispered. "Keep Snails home tomorrow; I'll clear it with Cheerilee. We will work this out, I Pinkie Promise. Okay?"
Raindrops said nothing.
"Okay?" urged Trixie. "Please, Raindrops. I--"
"Okay." Raindrops heard her voice, as if from a distance, and realized how toneless it was. Like she had already given up. "I'll stay home with Snails tomorrow."
Trixie hugged him for a few more seconds before letting go. "Alright. We'll think up some more ideas, and if all else fails, I'll tell Luna we really do need her help. Sound good?" She waited until Raindrops nodded, then smiled. "Need me to walk you home?"
Raindrops shook her head and flapped her wings. "I'll fly," she muttered. "See you tomorrow."
She soared high into the air and began moving towards her family's home. Her friends, she thought, would try their very hardest to find a way to deal with Juggernaut. But they wouldn't succeed. There were too many factor working against them.
Juggernaut was going to traumatize her brother all over again, and there was absolutely nothing anypony could do about it.