As the days went by, rumours spread among the townsfolk regarding the mysterious costumed hero.
“I heard she’s a Pegasus who lost her parents to crime.”
“She’s obviously a unicorn! There are flight spells you know.”
“I heard she took down a forger last week.”
“No, it was a gang of kidnappers!”
“No, it was an army of Nightmare Moon worshippers!”
“I heard it was an ursa and a hydra she defeated using only her bare hooves and a tree!”
A little filly named Diamond Tiara heard all these rumours, collecting every picture of Mare-Do-Well she could find and stuck them on her bedroom wall, eyes glimmering with wonder and excitement. She couldn’t wait for school next week, she had something very special cooked up for the class.
------------------------------------------------
Miss Spitfire stood in front of her class, smiling in an easygoing manner. “Today, Class, we are going to be discussing heroes of legend, both past and present. We’ll be reviewing notable figures from history as well as from the myths and legends found all around Equestria.”
“Ooh!” Diamond Tiara held her hoof aloft. “Ooh ooh oooh!”
Spitfire chuckled. “Yes Diamond Tiara, have something to share with the class?”
“You bet! Me and my friends made something special about the coolest hero around!”
“Oh? Do go on.” The teacher smiled.
“When criminals in this world appear
And frighten all who see and hear
The cry goes out both far and near
For Mare-Do-Well! Mare-Do-Well!
Mare-Do-Well! Mare-Do-Well!
Speed of lightning!
Roar of thunder!
Fighting those who rob and plunder!
Oh, Mare-Do-Well, MARE-DO-WELL!!”
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Grand Heist threw a newspaper out through his window, the headline reading ‘Mare-Do-Well takes down pickpocket!’
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A pair of nobles were chatting together as they read through a newspaper.
“When Berry Punch began to fall
From a building 7 stories tall
She knew upon who whom she could call
Whose ears prick up when Berry hollers
MARE-DO-WELL! Mare-Do well!”
“Mare-Do-Well! Mare-Do-Well!”
“There is no need to fear, or quaver.” A passing member of the royal guard joined the pair, tipping his helmet to them with a smile. “Mare-Do-Well was there to save her.”
“Mare-Do-Well!” The trio sang together. “Oh, Mare-Do-Well!”
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Grand Heist threw a newspaper into his fireplace, the headline reading ‘Mare-Do-Well the hero of Ponyville’ as it burned to ash.
--------------------------------
The trio of fillies ran through the town after school, the townsponies joining in as they sang.
“And when our woeful monologue
Is how by evil we’ve been flogged
Then breaking through the clouds and fog
Not cloud nor bird nor even bell
COMES MARE-DO-WELL!”
“Mare-Do-Well!” The crowd cried out as they saw the hero in question fly across the rooftops, pointing to her. “Mare-Do-Well!”
------------------------------------------
Grand Heist tore another newspaper apart, gritting his teeth in rage, slamming his window shut to drown out the townsponies’ cries.
“Who cares about this mare of wonder
Tearing evil spawns asunder?
That Mare-Do-Well
‘Oh what a wonder mare’,” he sang sarcastically,
“I will end her tale
Mare-Do-Well
MARE-DO-WELL!!!!!”
Grand Heist panted, body shivering in anger and rage, surrounded by the remains of countless discarded, ruined and destroyed newspapers.
“That knock-off thinks she can steal MY outfit, steal MY fame, the attention I deserve!? She has another think coming!” The thief ranted. “I’ll show her! I’ll show her who deserves the fame, the glory!”
He charged out of his room, glaring in determination.
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Applejack stood with Rarity and Twilight at Sugarcube Corner, the latter two there on business. Twilight was delivering some supplies for the bakery while Rarity was helping man the counter.
“So that Mare-Do-Well has been the talk of the town, hasn’t she?” Rarity wondered aloud.
Applejack smiled a twinkle in her eyes. “I think she has been doing an admirable job, especially since we don’t have any royal guards or official law enforcement in this town. Not to mention just how DASHING she looks in that outfit.”
Twilight shrugged dismissively. “Sadly, I don’t have much interest in that sort of stuff. As long as she doesn’t bother the farm, I’m alright with it, and I do appreciate that she’s helped a lot of ponies, but I’m not going to actively follow her or talk about her like some ponies.”
“Well you must admit that she’s certainly a better role model than that Gand Heist!” Applejack said huffily.
“I wouldn’t call him a role model, but I suppose he and Mare Do-Well do share some similarities, particularly the outfit.” The farmer shrugged. “Though I have even less interest in the exploits of a thief than a ‘superhero’.”
“Well, I certainly feel that Grand Heist has outstayed his welcome, and I hope Mare-Do-Well sends him a proper message that he has outstayed his welcome.” Applejack huffed irritably.
Rarity looked at her friend in concern. “You alright there, Jackie? I know Grand Heist is kind of annoying and a bit of jerk, but he’s not that big of a deal.”
“Yeah, Grand Heist is pretty much harmless.” Twilight added. “He has yet to hurt anypony, and he’s been largely quiet in Ponyville lately.”
“Ah know it’s just...” The fashionista bit her lip. “Well, Ah promised Rainbow Ah wouldn’t talk about it yet...”
Twilight raised a brow. “Talk about what? And where HAS Rainbow been lately? I haven’t seen her for a while.”
“Oh she’s just in her library, ruminating on what to do with the tickets the Princess gave her.” Applejack replied, looking around nervously.
Rarity put a hoof to her chin in thought. “Hmmm come to think of it Rainbow hasn’t been coming around since...”
The door to Sugarcube Corner slammed open, the gold-clad figure of Grand heist silhouetted in the sunlight. The thief ran in, placing his forelegs over Twilight and Rarity’s shoulders.
“Ah, nothing like some morning gossip to start the day.” The superstar criminal said casually. “Now, you girls know where I can talk to that OH SO POPULAR Mare-Do-Well?”
Rarity blinked. “And...why would we know anything about that?”
Grand Heist chuckled affably. “Oh, I’m not trying to imply anything, it’s just well, I have some words for that mare and...well, let’s call it a hunch, but I have reason to believe you may know her very well.” He turned to Applejack, who was glaring at him. “You wouldn’t happen to know anything, would you, miss clothes designer?”
“What I design for my clients and the accuracy of any connection to a local vigilante I may or may not have is no concern of yours.” Applejack said evenly, giving the thief a half-lidded stare. “And why are you so active today? You aren’t exactly known to be personable.”
“Ah, but you see, ma Cherie, I’m looking to reinvigorate my image, perhaps allow my fans a chance to see the greatest thief in all of Equestria in person!”
Applejack raised a brow. “And Ah assume that also includes the Royal Guard?”
“Oh, Miss Applejack, such a wit! It’s not like those obsessive justice zealots can catch, especially not all the way in Canterlot.” Grand Heist smiled, his voice dropping a couple octaves. “Now, do tell me where I can find that Mare-Do-Well, I think we’re both intelligent adults, we all know who she is.”
“Is it Spitfire?” Rarity interjected. “Because she IS a former wonderbolt and she CAN fly...”
Grand Heist jerked to her, eyes wide in anger. “No it’s not the school teacher you ninny! It’s obviously”
“Somepony help!” a pony yelled outside.
“There’s no need to fear, Mare-Do-Well is here!”
Grand Heist blinked, looking between the three mares and then to the still open door, then smiled pleasantly. “I think we shall continue this discussion later. Ariva derci, ladies.”
He ran outside, leaving Twilight and Rarity to look perplexed, Applejack taking the opportunity to leave the building as well.
---------------------------------
Mare-Do-Well leapt from rooftop to rooftop, leaping to the ground when she spotted a very gaudy individual running towards her.
Grand Heist screeched to a halt in front of his quarry, panting for breath. “Listen, you’re new to this and all, but let me reiterate something: this little...cry for attention is cute and all, but we both know you’re nothing. I am the star of this town, the pony who puts it on the map, so why don’t you just throw that stupid, ridiculous outfit away and go home and do...whatever it is you do, and we can both forget this whole ordeal right now before I get mad. Deal?”
Mare-Do-Well moved to reach for him until the cry came again. “HEEELLLP!” Mare-Do-Well froze for just a fraction before turning to run in the direction of the cry.
“Hey don’t ignore me!” Grand Heist exclaimed, running down the street after the hero. “I am not done talking to you!”
He reappeared in front her with a green flash, Mare-Do-Well blinking surprise before jumping over him, leaping across the rooftops. Grand Heist growled and teleported after the vigilante repeatedly from rooftop to rooftop before Mare-Do-Well decided to simply take flight into the air. Grand Heist grumbled and teleported into the air in front of her.
“Stop running away from me you coward!” The thief yelled into the hero’s face, blinking as he suddenly began to descend to the ground away from her. Mare-Do-Well shook her head and flew over towards the person in need as Grand Heist fell.
Grand Heist glared at her, a green glow surrounding him as he began to start a teleport again...only for the glow to disappear with a loud ‘PARP’ sound, a silver ring under his mask disintegrating harmlessly. Grand Heist yelped as he fell into a pond, a frog leaping onto his head as he rose up, outfit soaked though.
“She’s despicable.” Grand Heist grumbled.
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The stallion brightened as Mare-Do-Well landed in front of him.
“There’s no need to fear, Mare-Do-Well is here!”
“Oh thank you so much!” The stallion smiled gratefully, holding up a jar of jam. “I could really use some help opening this!”
Mare-Do-Well facehoofed.
---------------------------------
Grand Heist paced in his room, deep in thought.
“Negotiating didn’t work, so what will? I suppose being a superhero, the only thing she cna understand is violence! That in mind...perhaps...perhaps I shall turn her into a flea, a harmless little flea, and then I’ll put that flea in a box, then that box into another box and mail to myself and once it arrives....I’LL SMASH IT WITH A HAMMER!” He slammed his hooves together in emphasis. “It’s brilliant I tell you, genius I say!”
He was brought out of his ramblings by the buzzing of a small, blue gem flashing on his desk.
“On the other hoof, to save on postage, I suppose I could ask for some help from my cohort.” He grinned darkly. “Surely he can get me something...”
-----------------------
Grand Heist sat some distance outside of town, binoculars held up to his eyes as he surveyed Ponyville, a massive catapult holding a large boulder behind him.
“Hey.” A voice said irritably behind him. “You’re on my property.”
“Oh go away, I’m trying to find Mare-Do-Well.” Grand Heist replied, waving his hoof dismissively at the pink pony. “I don’t have time for fans right now, unusual as it may be.”
Pinkamena glared at him. “Ordinarily, I wouldn’t give anypony the time of day, especially not a weirdo dressed like a Hearth’s Warming tree, except you a) happen to be on my property and b) seem to be using one of my stock for...whatever it is you’re doing.”
“It’s just a rock, anypony can find those lying around out here.”
“Exactly why I moved up here, but aside from that, that BOULDER contains a very rich vein of copper that Iron Will Industries ordered, so, if you don’t mind, I’ll take it back.” Pinkamena spoke through gritted teeth.
Grand Heist bopped her on the head with his binoculars. “If you don’t even want an autograph, then please GO AWAY, I am BUSY!”
Pinkamena glared, stepping back away from him. Grand Heist chuckled arrogantly, turning back to ponyville. His eyes widened as he spied Mare-Do-Well flying around and the thief quickly pulled on a rope to activate the catapult behind him.
In his haste to strike and his focus entirely on Ponyville, he did not notice that Pinkamena had taken the boulder and in fact several small but key parts of the catapult, so instead of hefting a massive boulder at his nemesis, it instead collapsed midswing, the arm of the catapult falling on top of him, crushing his body.
A hoof reached out limply from under the catapult arm and rose weakly. “I’m alright...” Grand Heist spoke with a slur from underneath.
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Twilight was whistling to herself as she walked through Ponyville.
“STAMPEDE!” somepony cried.
Twilight blinked looked to the distance to see a large cloud of dust as a stampede of cows ran into town...and were almost upon her!
In a split second, Mare-Do-Well ran over and grabbed the farmer as Grand Heist leapt from a nearby rooftop, hammer held aloft. Mare-Do-Well disappeared in a flash, with Twilight in tow, leaving Grand Heist to fall to the ground, his face falling. The thief slowly sat up, ears pulling back as he spied the stampede near him...and then rush over him, trampling him under hoof.
Twilight spied the scene as she stood on a rooftop, Mare-Do-Well’s body glowing beside her as as the cows were corralled towards the Sparkle farm by several planks of wood floating through the air. The cows mooed in confsion and distress as a they were lead into a circle, the wood being sued to erect a sturdy fence to hold them until they calmed down, no matter hwo they struggled they couldn’t knock it down.
Twilight blinked, turning to her saviour. “Oh, thank you very much! I just hope those cows are”
She stopped in mid-sentence. The Mysterious Mare-Do-Well had mysteriously vanished without her looking.
“I suppose that’s kinda rude...but she did help stop a stampede from hurting a lot of ponies, including myself.” The farmer smiled as she leapt from the roof to the ground. “She’s much nicer than she looks.” She hummed to herself as she walked back home to speak with the cows.
Grand Heist’s twisted, injured body twitched occasionally as he was left on the ground, grunting in pain as he slowly dragged himself to his hideout.
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Grand Heist held onto a baby carriage, disguised in a cloak. He figured that all he needed to do was draw Mare-Do-Well himself rather than wait for her. He chuckled as he thought the plan through in his head again: he would push the carriage towards a large pit he had dug up earlier. The moment Mare-Do-Well would grab it, hoping to save it, only to active the several small rockets that would send it, and her, hurtling into the pit filled with ravenous dogs, wasp nests and a porcupine. Then she would see who gets the last laugh!
It would be Grand Heist. He’d get the last laugh.
He shoved the cart violently towards the pit. “Oh no! My poor, helpless child is about to fall into that mysteriously freshly dug hole! Is there no one who can save it!?”
Fluttershy gently pushed the carriage back, pushing it into the thief’s hooves. “Here you go miss! Be sure to keep a strong grip okay?” She flew out of the way, leaving a bewildered Grand Heist behind.
The gaudily dressed thief’s eyes widened as the rockets fired and he was sent flying, managing to let go just as it flew over the pit...and thus falling in, his screams of pain filling the area.
Fluttershy giggled at his antics. “You’re so silly, miss!”
------------------------------
Grand Heist gritted his teeth in rage, ignoring the buzzing of his accomplice. He chuckled darkly as he drew up what was in his mind the perfect, foolproof plan to getting his revenge on Mare-Do-Well and thus securing his fame in the backwater town.
“Boom boom boom.” He muttered quietly to himself with a wicked cackle.