"So remind me again," a white unicorn with a flame styled mane and box hooves began, "Why are we cruising on a dirt road, again?"
Inside the Mach 6, an immortal teen in white armor drove with an anthro Eevee and a white unicorn on a dirt road. "Box, some idiot stole Cortana and half of Rouge. Currently, I have a boring bat lady that can't hack into anything nor accept voice commands!"
"I don't know what you mean by "Korean eye have bad lady hat can pack into anything or receipt voice demands." Do you want to search the internet for "Korean eye have bad-"
"No."
"Calling Rafiki."
"NO."
A deep voice chirped on the ultimatrix, "Pride Land Dojo, Mr. Rafiki isn't here. Can you leave a message?"
"I'm having a malfunction Kratos, hang up." I replied.
"No malware detected. Sending Trojan Horse to Princess Luna."
"Deny!" I screamed.
"Calling Rafiki."
"Pride Land Dojo-"
"Hang up, Kratos." I replied.
"Have you tried turning your computer off and on?"
Box placed a hoof on the ultimatrix, its light flashing green for a moment. "Good goodness, that was close!" Box's voice exclaimed.
"Virus Detected."
"Huh. Rouge.EXE stopped working." The white earth stallion on my scouter gave me a salute, "TinyBox.EXE reporting for temporary duty!"
Box gave a smirk, picking the map back up, "Knowing you, I created Tiny to combat you when you returned."
"But, Celestia isn't angry at you. Rainbows and Sunshine." Tiny replied, rolling his box hoof. Tiny resembled Box, but instead of blue eyes and red mane he had red eyes and a mane that seemed to be made of blue cyber fire. "Anyway- Is that a cross fusion matrix?!"
"Don't destroy anything."
We stopped at a pub, walking inside and passing the tables and pool tables around us.
Sitting at the bar, a small tan girl in a pink shirt and orange shorts sat with a dancing purple backpack unloading a bag of bits. We sat at her sides as she placed the bag on her back. I assumed she had a shot, since she held a shot glass with an ice cube before she happily shouted, "OK. We need to count five bits to pay for the apple juice! Uno... Dos... Tres..."
As she counted, the coins magically left the small sack and landed on the counter. The three of us shared a glance before focusing on Dora.
"...Seis! Remember, leave a tip!" her attention was drawn to me, "Oh hi! Are you Fandom Man?"
"...Yes? Si?"
"Great! We need to find Sniper and return your friends!"
"Yeah... We've got no time to lose!" We hopped to our feet, only for the bar tending pony to stop us.
"You three ain't leavin', bub. Buy someting first," he said.
Dora looked at the readers, "I'm going to beat this guy up! Yell "Ponche" real loud!" She grabbed the unicorn by his horn and pulled him in for a headlock, rapidly punching his in the face with an innocent smile. "Ponche! Ponche! Ponche! Ponche!!"
He staggered back, trying to process the situation. He then broke the nearest bottle as a weapon.
Dora got up, "Let's finish him! Stand up now and yell "patada giratoria" as loud as you can!" She ran up, closing the distance as her leg rose, "Patada Giratoria!" He fell to the ground, moaning as Dora looked back at you. "Great!"
Eevee Mon looked over to me, "Apple juice?"
I gave a nod at him, "Apple cider."
"Come on, vaminos~! Everybody, let's go~!" Dora sang for the millionth time in her looping song. She suddenly stopped to ask the readers, "Dónde está? Where's Sniper?"
There was a ping as a bullet flew past Dora's head. "Bloody wanker!"
"There he is!"
I kept swerving, trying to prevent the Sniper from getting a better shot. Dora treated this like a joyride while Box and Eevee Mon tried firing the Sniper, who rode on a jeep with two more. The red Sniper reloaded his gun, "This'll be a bloody Christmas miracle to down these buggers!"
"We are in the Bad Lands," Dora's map responded, "New directions added! Changeling Hive, Big Rock, Sniper Hideout! Changeling Hive-" [b]*POW!!!* "I'm the Map! I'm the Map!" he shouted as he ducked back inside Backpack's pocket.
Just as soon as Map hid, star began floating over our heads. Dora happily screamed, "Catch them! Catch them! Catch them!"
Everyone grabbed stars, even the Snipers, though their stars were given to Dora.
"Explorer Star! Arma culo grande Star!" she cheered. The stars flew into Dora's star pocket, laughing as a huge star that resembled a colt revolver on each point hovered around Dora, a crazed smile on its face. Before the star could do anything, the Sniper's jeep collided with a dead tree and I had to grab the wheel and maneuver around cacti. "Everyone yell "auge"!"
We shrugged, "AUGE!"
Arma culo grande Star gave a wicked laugh as it fired a large bullet in the distance. A small mushroom cloud exploded behind us, I saw it on the rear view mirror before looking back at Dora, who wore a pair of shades. "Sniper no sniping."