//------------------------------//
// Chapter One 
// Story: Disease of the Soul 
// by Dilos1 
//------------------------------//

	 The bright luminous glow of the full moon shone down on many grand structures and towers of the city of Canterlot, bathing the almost surreal collection of towering spires and grand halls of one the greatest cities in Equestria. The streets were eerily quiet, as most of the city's inhabitants had seen fit to head home from their duties to rest, and resume their lives the following morning, while those with jobs that took place during the nighttime hours prepared to assume their shifts under the watchful eyes of Luna's cosmic pearl.

Those ponies without duties or the present need to go to bed right away simply strolled around for a night out on the town, either alone or in the company of a friend on a park bench.

But in the tallest spire in the grand mountain city, a tall alabaster figure, with sparkling magenta eyes and a mane and tail that flowed like the auroras that could be seen far to the north, stood solitary on a wide marble balcony as she surveyed her and her sister's kingdom in all its glory. But none of its splendor held very much appeal to her at the moment; not the glistening rooftops of massive and ornate structures, nor the way how the moon gave the city itself an otherworldly feel. As Princess Celestia gazed upward at the slowly ascending moon, the alicorn could not help but feel a sense of melancholy turn her normal neutral expression into one of sadness and disappointment.

"What did I do wrong?"

Celestia spoke to nopony in particular, yet she paused anyway after she voiced the unheard question as though the answer to her query would manifest itself before her in response. She had no such luck however, as the cool night air of the passing months of Fall remained utterly silent, offering Celestia no answer.

Letting her gaze drop downward to the city and her palace below Celestia looked at but did not really see nor hear the elegant architecture or the faint clanging of the night guard's armor as they readied themselves for a scheduled patrol of the castle grounds.

"What did I do to make you turn away from me?"

Again there was no reply to her question, and Celestia found herself feeling foolish for expecting one. For a few long moments afterward the alicorn simply stood there, perched on her balcony like a great swan; regal and majestic, but broken and tired inside.

"Twice now I have failed," she finally said when the silence became oppressive and threatened to crush her under its weight. "First with my sister, and now with you, my student." As the words left her mouth Celestia clenched her eyes as she recalled her first encounter with the red maned unicorn filly that had once so long ago been so eager to learn from the Princess. It did not matter to Celestia that she could not cause the dragon egg to hatch. Truth be told, nopony before Twilight had ever been able to perform the magic necessary to do so. 

What mattered to Celestia then was the filly's tenacity when she was presented with a task that even the most accomplished mage would have deemed a nigh impossible task. It was her unwillingness to give up or accept failure after spending minutes on end trying to coax the life hidden behind its shell to emerge that had initially caught the Princess' interest. And it was that interest that Celestia displayed to the filly that helped her make the choice to take Sunset Shimmer under her wing as her student.

If only things had turned out differently.

If only Celestia had not been foolish enough to make the same mistakes she had made with-

"Sister?"

Startled out of her thoughts of remorse, Celestia lifted her head and turned to look at who had spoken to her.

"Art thou well?" Princess Luna asked, her face impassive as she spoke. Her eyes however, bright blue orbs so full of life and emotion that Celestia could practically feel the concern ebbing off in waves from the midnight blue alicorn, betrayed her thoughts in regards to the  state her elder sister was in.

"Yes Luna," Celestia answered in a soft tone. "I will be fine."

Luna blinked and ruffled her wings slightly in response. She then strolled up to stand next to Celestia, her metal-clad hooves clicking on the hard marble floor of the balcony and her mane of swirling starlight billowing as she approached. The two stood in silence for only a few minutes, but to Celestia it felt to her more like a small eternity had passed them by. Eventually the taller pony saw fit to break the silence.

"Your night looks especially beautiful Luna," she said as she turned her attention back to the moon, grateful that the shadowy imprint of a mare's head was no longer there to remind her of one her greatest failures. But even though it was no longer able to taunt her as it had for over a thousand years as it once had, Celestia's heart was still weighted down by the course of action she had to take in order to keep Equestria safe. "I never could hold a candle to how well you could orchestrate the stars," she added.

Luna glanced up at her moon, then back to her sister. "Perhaps," she said. "But we are certain thou did well enough in our absence."

Luna's answer, however she might have intended it to be, did little to ease Celestia of her anxiety. Redirecting her attention the great white disk that occupied the night sky Luna sighed through her nostrils as she continued to stand in silence by her sister. Another span of minutes passed before the Princess of the Night said, "The appointed time is nearing, is it not?"

Celestia stiffened, somewhat irked that her sister had guessed the reason for her sadness so easily. It took a long time for her to respond, and when she finally did it came in the form of a nod; a slow movement that conveyed a sense of heartache and dread.

"If she chooses to return, would it not be prudent for thou to be present?" Luna asked.

This time Celestia's reply came more quickly than the others."I have already seen fit to station a guard outside the chamber where the mirror is being kept, and I put spells in place that will alert me of any magic being used in there. If she does choose to come, then I will know."

"That is not the reason we ask thee, sister."

Celestia's breath caught in her throat. Tearing her gaze away from the moon she found herself looking into the eyes of her younger sister. And no longer was she keeping her emotions contained behind a mask of impassiveness. On Luna's visage was a look of such concern and sadness that Celestia was tempted to take a step back. She remained rooted the spot though as Luna continued speaking.

"We are not ignorant to thy troubles Celestia. We have seen how thy dreams consume thee about this Sunset Shimmer." Luna paused in her speech to draw in a breath. "Thou art fearful that thy former apprentice has slid further down the path of darkness since her departure."

For a long while neither one them spoke. Celestia for her part was trying to remain as stoic as possible in front of her sister, but found it to be extremely difficult to do so, as Luna had hit very close to home with her statement. And Celestia knew, no matter how hard it might be for her to admit both to Luna and herself, that she was right. Eventually she could not maintain her straight face any longer. Celestia exhaled, releasing a breath that she did not know she had been holding, and her eyes became downcast.

"Yes," she finally said with a slight hitch in her voice. Taking a breath herself she then began stutter out, "I had seen the signs Luna. I saw what she was turning her into. What I was turning her into. And yet even then I did not think to intervene more than I already had. And now, because of that, there is so much bitterness and resentment between us." Celestia paused to look back at Luna. "I never seem to learn, do I?" she said before turning to walk inside. She did not need to explain the meaning of her question for Luna to decipher what she was implying.

Following her elder sibling Luna said, "Dear sister, surely thou must know that we have forgiven thee, just as thou has forgiven us for a crime that was far greater?"

With a heavy sigh Celestia went to stand by the hearth that took up a large portion of her bedchambers. The wood inside the hearth showed no signs of burning, in spite of the flames that roared endlessly in their purpose of reducing the enchanted wood to cinders.

"I know Luna," Celestia said quietly as she gazed solemnly at the crackling flames. "And I cannot begin to tell you just how much that means to me to hear those words, after a thousand years of regret." Celestia hesitated as a very small smile crossed her face, unseen by her sister. But as quickly as it arrived, it disappeared. "However that does not mean that I have yet forgiven myself."

Behind Celestia Luna was silent. The taller alicorn turned her head to look at her sister. Luna's expression was almost unreadable, but once again it was her eyes that betrayed her emotions. In them Celestia saw a grave mixture of sadness and guilt.

"Sister," Luna said, breaking the silence, "surely thou dost not blame thyself for our actions?" When no answer was forthcoming she stated, "Celestia, twas our own jealousy and bitterness that allowed the Nightmare to take us so long ago."

At that Celestia turned to face her sister fully. "And it was my negligence that engendered such feelings in the first place," she said, grief evident in her voice as she struggled to look Luna in the eye. "Don't you see Luna? I failed to recognize my own ignorance. I failed to see how I was pushing you further and further away. And when I finally saw fit to do something about it, I was too late." Unable to keep her head up anymore from the weight of her guilt Celestia let her gaze drop the floor. Her wings drooped as she said so softly that Luna almost did not hear her, "I had failed as a sister. I had failed you."

As she finished her last sentence Celestia felt a single tear roll down her cheek. She took a shaky breath and turned back to look at the fire once more. "And now," she said, lowering her tone to that of a whisper, "I have only built upon my failure by making the exact same mistakes with Sunset."

"Sister?" Luna ventured after a pause in the conversation.

At first Celestia did not answer, unsure what else there was to be said. Finally speaking she said, "I will be fine Luna. . . .I just wish to be alone right now. To gather myself."

For what seemed like another eternity Celestia heard nothing but the crackling flames of the hearth. Eventually it was interrupted by the sound of hoofsteps retreating slowly as it echoed around the chamber, followed by the gentle flapping of feathery wings before fading away into the quiet of the night.





It was still a number of hours until the sun was scheduled to rise and Celestia would have to set it on its path across the morning sky  before eventually having it disappear over the opposite horizon to make way for Luna to raise the moon again. It was a ritual between the sisters that the two had upheld and adhered to for generations. Yet Celestia could still remember in perfect detail the day that ritual had been broken. She would never forget that day when she had been forced to use the Elements of Harmony against her own family. When Celestia had recovered as much as she could from the weight of her actions she had tried to rationalize what she had to do to save Equestria from an eternal night. 

What else could she have done? Luna had already refused to lower the moon, ignoring Celestia's pleas. She had already given herself fully to the Nightmare's foul taint, transforming herself into what future generations would call a wicked being of darkness. Celestia had no choice but to act against her sister. What could she have done?

"Something," Celestia said quietly as the flames continued to dance before her. "I could have done something."

It was, in Celestia's mind, not something that she had done that affected her so deeply, but rather what she had not done. It was something that kept her awake for nights on end; a question and answer that haunted her every day for the last thousand years, one that mocked her for her shortcomings with her sister. And now, a thousand years later, that same question mocked her for her failure with Sunset. Celestia took a deep breath, wanting to be rid of her thoughts. She had already come to terms with her regret years earlier, and Luna's return and redemption had helped ease her mind a great deal.

So why was she now once again feeling herself sinking into that same miasma of depression that had been afflicting her for ten centuries? It did not take much contemplation on her part to come to the appropriate answer. Letting a tired sigh escape her lips, Celestia turned away from the hearth and slowly walked over to a wall occupied entirely by multiple bookshelves of ornate design. Not a single shelf was empty, as dozens of tomes and books that Celestia had collected throughout her life filled every spare crevice that could be found. Sometimes she wondered how the bookshelves did not collapse under their weight.

Books from almost every conceivable subject adorned the shelves, from the memoirs of friends and aqquaintances long past to more modern additions of today's generation, such as "Rock Farming for Dimwits". But Celestia had not come for any of those. She already knew where the book she desired was located. Her long spiral horn became shrouded in faint golden aura, as a large brown book was slid out of its usual place at the top shelf. Held in the grip of her magic, the book floated down towards Celestia. Turning it in her grasp, the alabaster alicorn could not help but feel a sense of nostalgia, and sadness when she saw the stylized sun emblem woven into the front cover.

It was not unlike Celestia's own mark. In fact it was an almost perfect replica of the symbol that adorned her flank, announcing to all her duty of raising the sun in the morning. Celestia knew that, somewhere out there, there was another book that bore the similar mark of her former student.

For a long while Celestia stood there, studying the book as it floated in her grip, unsure if she should really be doing this, or even if she wanted to. All it could do now was bring her more pain and heartache. She knew that she should just put it back in its place and go to bed to get as much rest as possible before raising the sun in a few hours. And yet, in spite of her reasoning, the book remained where she held it.

Sighing in defeat, Celestia walked back over to lay down in front of the hearth with her legs underneath her, the book following obediently before coming down to rest in front of her. Celestia was about to flip open the cover, but she hesitated, unsure if she should be opening old wounds. So for a few long moments she stared at the unopened book, and the only sound that could be heard was that of fire.

Celestia briefly considered just putting it back on the shelf and forgetting about it, but something kept her rooted to the spot, and she was unable to do anything but gaze forlornly at it. Eventually she decided not to waste the effort of getting it the first place. Taking a deep breath to calm her now racing heart, and used her magic to open it to the first page.

The paper within was slightly yellowed with age, but aside from that it was near perfect condition. And on it was written a single paragraph comprised of neat and flowing letters.



Dear Princess Celestia,

If you are reading this then that means the literate transference spell that you taught me is doing its job. So that means whatever is written in one book will appear in the pages of the other.
On that note allow me to tell you how honored I am to have you as my teacher, Princess, and I will strive to do my absolute best to make you proud of me. You are, after all, not only my Princess but my hero as well

Signed, Sunset Shimmer.



Celestia's heart became as heavy as lead when she finished reading Sunset's short but heartfelt letter. The fact that Sunset had chosen this as the first thing to write to her in the book had touched the alicorn deeply back then, and for a fleeting moment she imagined that she had stepped back in time. Her fantasy of course was shattered when she saw the date it had been written, placing it well over ten years ago. Still wondering whether or not she should be doing this, Celestia turned the page, and started to read.

For what seemed like hours Celestia sat there as she read the passages of her former student. And as she studied the notes her face became more solemn and grave, and deep inside her chest her heart began to ache as though it were being squeezed by a vice. How had it come to this? Why was she so futilely seeking a semblance of comfort from words written so long ago, even when she knew they would bring none? Celestia did not know. Maybe she thought that if she read Sunset's notes from when she was happy just to be with the Princess, then perhaps Celestia would be able to forget for a moment what the young unicorn had become. Or maybe she wanted to forget her both of their mistakes, for a little while at least.

Whatever the reason may be, delving into the past was having an adverse effect on Celestia none-the-less. Steeling herself, Celestia skipped ahead a few pages to somewhere halfway through the book, and gazed sadly at the very last words Sunset had wrote to her before she left.



Princess Celestia,

For over ten years now I have been your student, and I have learned much in that time thanks to your tutelage. But despite my desire to learn more you kept things hidden from me, saying that I was not yet ready. 
And like the little filly I was back then I believed you. So I waited and waited for the day when you would finally tell me that I was ready. But that day never came, and I began to suspect that you had a different motive for keeping me in the dark.
At first I cast these suspicions aside, until I began to notice that other ponies were allowed into sections of the Royal Archives that I myself was forbidden to enter. Ponies that were both younger and less experienced than I. I could not help but wonder at this.
Why was it that you would allow unicorns barely able to lift a pebble into the most secluded sections of the archives while your "most trusted student" was barred from entering? After some thought the answer became clear: I was not good enough for you anymore.
Nopony else seemed to notice it before, but not me. I noticed when there were times that you were withdrawn and unapproachable. Sometimes you would excuse yourself from your own teaching sessions to go do maker knows what, leaving me alone to wonder, "why?"
Was it something that I had said? Was it something that I did or didn't do?
But no matter what I did to convince myself that it just my own imagination, I knew that it had something to do with me. I knew because every time you would look my way, you would smile and put on a nice face. But your eyes gave everything away.



Celestia had already read this letter multiple times in the past, so she already knew what was coming. But she still found herself foolishly hoping that she would find something different than what was written down. She read on.



Almost very time we met you had this look in your eyes, like you were suffering from regret. Then I thought about why I was not allowed into the archives, why you would suddenly cut our sessions short, and I came to one conclusion: that I had somehow disappointed you.



Even though Celestia knew what was coming, knew that what was written could not be changed, it still made her heart lurch when she read that last sentence. But there was still more to be read however.



I do not know why, nor do I care any longer. All I want right now is to become greater than I am now, so I can prove to you just how far I have come. And I plan to go even farther.
I remember the mirror that you showed me, and your brief explanation about its nature . You told me then that I was not yet yet advanced enough in my studies to learn more about it, that I was not yet ready. But now I know that if I remain under your tutelage then I will never reach my full potential. I know of the world that lies beyond the mirror, and I know that it is there that I will have what I always deserved but never got from you.
I leave you now with these words Celestia. The next time you see me you will finally see my worth.
Goodbye.



There it was. The final letter that Sunset Shimmer had ever written to Celestia, declaring to the Princess her hatred and contempt, and the alicorn could do nothing more than sit there and gaze sadly at the final passage of the message, and it eventually came to the point where she could no longer contain herself. Clenching her eyes, Celestia bowed her head and began to weep openly, not caring if her tears fell on the pages or if anypony saw.

"Oh Sunset," she whimpered softly, as though she were injured. "My disappointment was never with you. . . It was with myself."

For a long time Celestia wept, mourning the loss of one who she had considered not just a student but a close friend. She did not know for how long she cried, only that when the whimpering ceased and her eyes produced no more tears, leaving them dry and puffy, her time piece located above the hearth indicated it was coming close to the point where she would have to pick herself up off of the floor, raise the sun for another day, and once more put on a facade so that nopony would see the pain hidden behind her serene outward appearance. There was no reason for them to believe otherwise; she already had a thousand years worth of experience to perfect her disguise.

Celestia slowly inhaled in an attempt to sooth her nerves for the day ahead, and let it out with as much anxiety as it would take. She performed this ritual a few times before she felt she was ready to stand. As she did so her joints seemed to grind into each other, protesting her sudden movement. Ignoring the discomfort Celestia proceeded to reignite her horn to pick up the book. The book rose into the air, and Celestia was just about close it when some of the pages slid inward from the motion. To prevent them from becoming bent she raised a hoof to straighten them out. But as she did so, something caught her eye.

There, to her confusion, was what appeared to be more words written a little farther into the book, partially hidden by the edges of the paper.

Celestia felt her heart catch in her throat.

Had Sunset Shimmer decide to write more after her previous letter? If so what did she write? Deciding that simply standing there looking dumbstruck would not help in any way Celestia hurriedly flipped through the book to the appropriate page, though she almost dreaded what she might find. Had Sunset fallen so far that she would continue to torment her former mentor with more spite-filled words? Or had she decide to change her mind concerning the whole matter, and ask Celestia for forgiveness and understanding, perhaps even requesting a second chance with the Princess?

Celestia sincerely hoped it was the latter, as she would have taken Sunset back in a heartbeat. She would then beg her former student's forgiveness in turn for being absent when the unicorn needed her most.

She found neither.

What  Celestia found instead was a single short paragraph. And instead of the neat and concise line work that was typical for Sunset, the words appeared to have more or less been hastily scrawled onto the parchment by an unsteady writing utensil. And when she read it, Celestia was filled with dread.



Please help me Celestia.
Everyone else is either dead or dying, and I don't know how much time I have left. Look for me in the building with the shooting star on it.
Please help me.
Sunset Shimmer.