The Weed

by kudzuhaiku


What a friend we have in cheeses

The griffon seemed like a helpful creature. Ortzi flew overhead, circling, keeping an eye on the wilds all around them as Maud pulled her wagon along the narrow road that followed along the river. After much discussion, a decision was made to find the dragon and see what was up. It was Maud that made the point that it was better to face the dragon directly and find out what was going on, than live with constant fear and worry about a surprise dragon visit. Tarnished Teapot hadn’t agreed at first, but after sleeping on it, it seemed sensible.

Dragons were supposed to be well behaved, in accordance to the treaty held with the Royal Pony Sisters. Even with the treaty, dragon attacks happened. In the wilds, bad things happened beyond the reach and the influence of the Royal Pony Sisters. Diamond dog attacks, dragon attacks, and not all griffons were ready for the magic of friendship. Equestria was a dangerous place, full of sapient, very intelligent magical predators that were capable hunters; as such, the orphanariums were full of foals and there were many tales of tragedy.

Ponyville, even though it suffered through frequent disasters, was a safe place by comparison. Tarnish had seen enough of the wilds to know how dangerous it was. He had survived attacks from many different sorts of vicious predatory beasts. Jackalopes, chupacabras, crackle jackals, flying skunks, (not predatory but unpleasant to say the least) a hydra, and one funky looking rooster-lizard thing that had left him petrified.

All of his experiences had left Tarnish a little wiser, allowing him to survive the wilds.


“You’ve gotten taller since I met you,” Maud said as she walked beside Tarnish. She craned her head upwards. “This must be the summer of your growth spurt.” She gave her husband a sidelong glance, batting her eyelashes at him. “All of you has grown.”

Cheeks flushed, Tarnish swallowed, now feeling rather hot and thirsty.

“You’re all legs,” Maud continued, not caring that Tarnish was looking flustered “If this keeps up, with as tall as you are getting, I’ll be able to stand beneath you and get out of the rain.”

“I’m not that tall.” Tarnish’s voice cracked and became somewhat squeaky.

“Hmm,” was Maud’s reply. She tilted her head upwards, peering out from beneath the brim of her sunhat, tracking the helpful griffon, and then returned her eyes to the road. It was Tarnish’s job to keep an eye on the griffon. The road was rocky, narrow, and full of sand, which made pulling the wagon difficult. The wheels hit the rocks half buried in the sand, bouncing, thumping, and slowing down. Pulling a wagon meant maintaining momentum; building said momentum was the hard part, and anything that slowed the wagon was a major detriment to forward progress.

Now aware of Maud’s words, Tarnish realised how much taller he was, and how he now looked down upon Maud. How much had he grown? At some point, he had failed to notice. He was several heads taller. He looked down at himself, spying his amulet, trying to take himself in. Like his mother, Tarnish was long, gangly, but not bulky. He was long necked, longer necked now than he had been. Feeling a bit self conscious, he wondered if his neck was too long. He felt like a giraffe. He jerked his head around, looking skyward, and saw Ortzi. The griffon was still circling.

No, Tarnish said to himself. Ortzi was descending, his circling was bringing him downwards in a slow, efficient manner. Tarnish stopped and looked at Maud. “He’s coming down, Maud, something must be up.”


Overhead, a massive shape blocked out the sun. Tarnish, his ears perked, heard a peep from Ortzi. He didn’t know what the peep meant, or what emotion it conveyed, but the sound made Tarnish worry as he took a step forwards, standing in front of Maud.

The dragon, while huge, was not the largest of dragons. Maybe fifty to seventy five feet in length, it flapped its wings as it made its way down to the floor of the chasm. The dragon was long, sleek, and skinny. It’s scales were pinkish-gold and purplish-silver, glittering in the early morning sunlight.

The dragon, lacking any better place to land, dropped down in the river with a splash and a crash. It stood on four legs, flexing its long wings, and then it’s long, serpentine neck snaked downwards, his head moving towards the trio on the shore.

Tarnish stepped forwards, reminding himself of Longhaul’s advice. It never hurt to be polite. “Hello… my name is Tarnished Teapot, this is my wife, Maud, and this griffon is our recent acquaintance. His name is Ortzi Goldbeak.” Tarnish paused and looked the dragon in the eye. “How can we help you?”

The dragon looked confused for a moment, then sad, and then, after studying Tarnish, hopeful. “My name is Gorgonzola and I’m trying to look for my offspring.”

“Offspring?” Tarnish shook his head. “We haven’t seen any baby dragons.”

“She’s not a dragon.” Gorgonzola looked apprehensive for a moment, biting her lip, and curls of steam rose from her nostrils. Her long talons flexed and her tail swished to and fro. “Grey Owl is a little pegasus… she is mine… mine… I found her… I have raised her.” The dragon paused, looking guilty. “She’s grown up a bit and she went off exploring when I wasn’t looking.”

All Tarnish could think about was his own mother. It brought up a lot of conflicting feelings for him. He nodded his head. “Of course we’ll help you… what can we do?” He saw a look of relief spread over the dragon’s face. As it turned out, a mother’s relief was easy to spot on almost any sort of face.

“A little ways south, there is a spider cave… I fear they have taken her,” Gorgonzola replied. “I hope she still lives. The spiders keep their prey alive… but only for so long.”

Tarnish turned to look at his companions. He saw Maud nodding and Ortzi was tilting his head. He returned his gaze to the dragon. “We’ll help. Can you show us the cave?”

“I can take you there,” Gorgonzola replied. She looked at the wagon and then back at the ponies. “I can also keep an eye on your belongings. The cave isn’t very far… I believe she is in there, but I could be wrong. I could pay you—”

“Ma’am, payment isn’t necessary.” Tarnish tilted his pith helmet back upon his head.

“Yes it is… we dragons pay our debts. To seek aid without payment is unthinkable.” Gorgonzola bristled at the very idea, her many spines and frills all standing out on end. Her claws flexed. “I shall pay you up front… my payment might be helpful.” The dragon reached up and pulled a sack that hung around her neck over her slender head.

She began to rummage inside, pulling out several stuffed animals, various odds and ends, and then, with a snarl of triumph, she pulled out a shining silver sword in a jeweled silver sheath. She held it by the sheath and extended it to Tarnish in her long talons. “It is magic… it will help you against the spiders.” She slid the long cord holding the bag back over her neck.

Not knowing what else to do, Tarnish accepted the sword. He glanced at it a brief moment, admiring its beauty, and then clipped the sheath to the strap that held on his saddlebags.

“Before we go… Ortzi, I hate to ask you, but I need for you to find me something… this is a good area to find it, but it might take some looking.” Tarnish went to the wagon, heading for the trunk with the books in it. “There are some plants that will help with spider bites… one of them is wild basil… other is a marsh potato… the marsh potato is going to be tricky to find, but there should be some around here. They’re tiny, purple, and smell real bad. They’re great for drawing out poison and infections.”

“I can try to find them,” Ortzi replied.

Maud, unhitching herself from the wagon, said nothing. She came around to the back of the wagon just as Tarnish was pulling out a book. She watched him flip it open and then pass the book to Ortzi. The griffon nodded and the big dragon was peering down, trying to get a look inside the book.

“We’ll search the spider cave to try and find Grey Owl.” Tarnish looked up at the dragon. “Once you take us there, please, return here and look after our wagon.”

“Of course,” Gorgonzola replied, bowing her head.

“Once we come out of the cave, I will launch a flare. Do you think you could see a flare from here?” Tarnish asked. He saw the dragon nod. “Good. Maud, are you ready to do this? I want to tell you to stay here with the wagon, but I know I’ll get lectured later if I do.”

Maud raised her eyebrow and gave Tarnish a cool, calm, and collected stare. “I think we have a better chance facing the spiders together.” She watched as Tarnish grabbed a few items and stuffed them into his saddlebags.

“I’m ready to go… let’s do this,” Tarnish announced.

Looking at Tarnish, Maud saw that he was a dashing looking figure with his saddlebags, his pith helmet, and the shiny sword now secured to his saddlebag strap. His fine chocolate pelt stood out in sharp contrast with the soft khaki colour of the rest of his gear. She was going to have to give him happy husband hugs later for his efforts.

“Who’s afraid of a few spiders?” Tarnish asked, looking up at the dragon.