The sun was shining, birds were chirping and the mad ponies were walking the grounds. The Everfree Asylum as it had come to be known housed several hundred 'guests.' Located far from the city itself the facility was founded on the notion that isolation would make recovery faster. Most inmates were there under their own volition, some were committed by loving family members, still others were ordered there by the courts.
The two meddlers Discord and Batmite were here for one of the middle, though by the time they would be done with her she'd be one of the latter. "This isn't much fun at all, look them." The draconequus was motioning to the mentally unstable ponies on their midday sojourn. "No rioting, none of them trying to eat the topiary. This looks less like a crazy house and more like an assisted living home."
"We're not here to turn a bunch of grannies into supervillains (Regardless of how awesome that sounds), we came to find one pony in particular." said the mite.
"I haven't forgotten, let's just teleport into her room and get on with it."
"Wait, I have a better idea. What if we disguise ourselves as psychiatrists to get ourselves inside?"
"And why would we do that?"
"Because how often do you get the chance to run around as a pony?"
Discord put a claw to his goateed chin in thought, "Considering we're both immortal beings with nigh limitless power and nothing better to waste our time on I'd say the answer is all the time."
"Please?"
"I didn't say no." With a snap of his paw he was chimera no more, instead he became a grey unicorn with a tornado on his flank. "A little costume I like to run around in every once in a while. Let's see yours."
Batmite floated down to terra firma, his body was engulfed in a comic cloud of smoke and the pony that emerged was a sight to behold. A ghastly creature looking like something a three year old would draw if he only had red and black crayons. "Well, what do you think?"
"An alicorn OC? Really?"
"Fine I'll change, (Stupid jerk can't appreciate good character design.) Here what about this?" Batmite changed form once more, this time his appearance was much more subdued, a simple earth pony with muted pastel coloration. He was also wearing a turtle neck sweater and glasses to complete the look.
"Much better."
Infiltration was child's play, with conjured up Ph.D.’s and identification papers getting access to patients was a snap. As they flipped through the registry they finally found the name they were looking for, Screwball. Her cell was located towards the rear of the top floor and two over muscled stallions stood guard in front. "May I help you sirs?"
"Yes you may, we are two visiting doctors from Germaney and were interested in getting an interview with the patient you are guarding." said Discord in disguise.
"No ponies are allowed inside her cell except those authorized by the hospital's director. You are not on the list of authorized staff."
"Are you sure? Because I think we both are." In his false hooves he held the sign in sheet and both their pseudonyms were written in indelible ink. "Is their going to be a problem?" Discord’s voice was rhythmic, layered, hypnotic
In an instant all the color seemed to drain from the two and a noticeable change in their personality became apparent. "Problem? I don't give a flying feather who goes in there! Come on Nightwatch, let's get some brewskies and watch hoofball." Both stallions got up and walked out of the room ignoring the ponies who weren't supposed to be there.
"Nice trick, how do you do that anyway?" asked Batmite as he ditched the disguise, once more becoming his little trickster.
Discord followed suit, though once he did he found his horns piercing through the foam tiles on the ceiling. To alleviate that he plucked his head from atop his neck and placed it lower on his body, "It's nothing difficult I assure you. Ponies are simple creatures, all too often they define their whole being by a single trait. Honesty, loyalty, generosity, one has simply to fiddle around in their disproportionately large heads enough to realize that such traits can be reversed. Applejack became a liar, Rainbow Dash abandoned her friends, Rarity clung to a worthless pile of rubble called Tom."
"And the once dutiful guards become slobs?" asked Batmite.
"Something to that effect, yes."
"Hmm, that seems pretty villainous to me. I thought you were reformed Discord."
"Oh PUH-LEASE. Me? Discord, reformed? I'd never dream of such a thing, I'm merely playing them like the fools they are until my opportunity to regain power comes. True they have those Elements of Harmony that can seal me away, but bearers die, I am eternal."
Batmite stared at him intently, this was either a major continuity hiccup or Discord was hiding something. "Didn't they return the Elements of Harmony already? What's preventing you from taking over?"
A cold sweat came off of Discord, as the droplets hit the ground they turned to bullets. "Well I ah, there's the um, it's complicated and... Shut up imp."
"You don't actually like Fluttershy do you? Little miss kindness hasn't tamed Equestria's master of chaos, has she?"
"I said shut up imp!" the draconequus was notably upset at this point. "I'd like to be in a good mood to meet my 'daughter." With a snap he melted the heavy bar across the door into a puddle of goo, he swung the door wide open and motioned for Batmite to step inside. "After you."
He stepped in, or rather floated in unprepared for the two hundred pound mare waiting to pounce him. From his new vantage point on the floor he could see she was in her late forties but wore a propeller beanie indicative of youth. Most striking were her unnatural eyes, an endless mass of swirling pink spiral. "Get off of me!"
"No, you’re the big hairy bat! Wait no, you’re too small to be him. Hmm," the mare child looked him over intently then licked his face. "Euach! Dust, moldy paper, powdered cheese! You're not the big hairy bat, you're his fanatic! I think I'll squash you anyway." She drew back a hoof, preparing to strike.
"Discord get her off of me!"
Immediately her continence changed, "Daddy?"
All the walls in the room took on the face of the draconequus, smiling with his fiendish smile. "Hello little one, daddy's glad to see you." She jumped up and started hugging the face walls.
"I missed you so much daddy! They stuck me in this dull place and threw away the key, but you're here now. Does that mean you've come to reclaim your rightful place as ruler?" She was acting just like a little child.
All the faces on the wall merged into one and then emerged from the wall itself, with his eagle talon he twirled the little propeller on her hat. "Sorry pumpkin, daddy is too busy to take over the world right now. But you know, you could do something for him."
"What can I do? They've locked me in here and thrown away the key, everypony wants me to stay in my padded room." Her eyes were like those of a sad rabid puppy.
"But who can restrain Discord? Nopony that's who!"
"Except for six teenage mares with their magical fashion accessories." said Batmite.
"Be quite imp." Screwball demanded.
"That's my girl, anyway the door is open and if you're careful nopony will find you on your way out. I even have a little gift for you, use it as you like." He handed her a long wooden box, inside was a revolver with a four foot barrel. "I bet you could take down an airplane in one shot with a gun like that."
"Thank you daddy! I'll put it to good use." Screwball began toying with the gun, pulling back the hammer and pointing it at the floating multidimensional man child.
"Really Discord, aren't we supposed to be getting guns out of the hands- er hooves of our children?" He knew it posed no threat to himself, though it did come from a god of chaos so what surprises it held was anyponies guess.
Discord placed a finger like paw in one of Screwball's ears and his talon in the other, then proceeded to detach them from the rest of his body. With her hearing obscured he felt safe in saying, "I shouldn't have to explain myself but that Thing is not any child of mine. She's merely a descendant of the ponies I altered to be better suited to living in my world. Everypony else calls her broken, when in reality it's the whole world that's broken, at least from her perspective."
"Why would you do that in the first place?" asked Batmite.
"My way of being a benevolent ruler I suppose. Whatever the case Screwball is a square peg in the round hole of Equestria. The Na in the H2O, the-"
"I get it, she's going to clash." Batmite floated over and tore out the disembodied appendages from her ears. "Screwball, if you think you’re up for it, your daddy and I have a little job we want you to do."
"I'll do anything daddy wants, anything." she said in earnest.
"Good then, all you have to do is cause as much chaos as you can. You know the big hairy bat right? He's going to try and stop you and when he does you're going to fight him." said Discord.
"And squash him like vermin?"
Discord calmly shook his head no, Batmite was furiously shaking no. "Not yet pumpkin, but you'll get your chance one day. For now we wan't you to be an...adversary, a rival to Batman.”
"His antithesis," Batmite spouted with a little lisp.
Screwball was genuinely dejected, "Alright daddy, can I at least beat the snot out of him?"
"Yes you may."
"Yay! Thank you daddy, you're the best!"
"I am aren't I? Scoot along now, you have allot of work ahead of you and not much time to do it in." The draconequus pointed to the open door, to freedom. Without hesitation she bolted out the door, as she did the sensor band across her hoof set off the proximity alarm, a blaring siren wailed across the speakers.
"Oopsie, I forgot they put this on me the last time I tried to bite the nurse's face off." She embarrassedly hid the band behind her. "I'd better go before the strong young stallions in clean white coats come to get me. Bye bye daddy!" And with that she was gone, down the halls and bursting through security desks like they were balsa wood.
Feeling confident that their work was done for the moment the two other beings decided to leave the scene before it became crawling with police. As he left Batmite couldn't help but feel sorry for the insane mare he'd just helped escape. She was devoted to Discord but he treated her like nothing more than a pawn. Still they did need a pony to act as an arch nemesis of sorts and she fit the bill. Still he wondered, could she be trusted not to kill Batman just when the show was getting started?
A question for another time, he too faded from the room.