//------------------------------// // Villains Victorious // Story: There's Nopony I'd Rather Be Than Me // by Tatsurou //------------------------------// Moony sat back in her office, going over paperwork as she sipped some hot chocolate and munched her way through a plate of sweets and an oversized cherry. She made a mental note to send a thank you to Miss Jubilee for managing to grow such large cherries simply to indulge her nostalgia, since it was one of so few things that let her remember those she was certain she would never see again. Changing from Princess to President, eating sweets and pies and oversized fruit, having commissioned the blacksmiths to build her a race car... She banished the thoughts of what she had lost. She had gained so much, after all, and the country - neigh, the entire world - depended on her. She couldn't let herself sink into sorrow. Still, these few comforts helped ease the ache in her heart somewhat, though it also kept such knowledge fresh in her mind. Taking another bite of the giant cherry, she turned her mind to recent events. Shining Armor and Cadence had married, with Moony and Celestia jointly overseeing the ceremony at dusk. After that, they had gone off on their honeymoon, and promptly uncovered a lost Empire and an ancient evil. As Moony was the first to receive the message about what had been found, she decided to address the evil in question herself. She was rather disappointed to discover that said evil was rather readily swayed with the proper approach. She now had a new Nightmare General, and the Canterlot Gardens now included a perpetual motion escalator powered by the magic in the crystal slinkies that constantly tried to climb down it. And Equestria had a new ally to the far north. Of course, there was also the promise of putting captured POWs in slavery to build and maintain more such escalators...but after what Moony had demonstrated in conquering Equestria, no one wanted to declare war on them. Just the rumor that Moony was marshaling her forces against someone was enough to get that someone surrendering, which meant there were never any prisoners. ...Moony still didn't know what to do about the surrender letter from the 'Cult of the Sun', since it was mostly desperate apologies for even considering trying to capture and imprison her as vengeance for doing so to Celestia. With all that sorted out, Moony had returned to her usual paperwork to keep the country running. Still, it was on quiet days like this one that she was left missing those she knew back at the arcade...and wondering why her cherry was dancing. "What?" she asked flatly as various other items in her chambers began animating and behaving in unusual manners. "What is this?" "Call it early negotiations," a somewhat familiar voice spoke out as something appeared in the air in front of her. At first she was confused at what she was seeing, but one of her Luna memories quickly came to the fore. "Discord, right?" she asked bluntly. "Sharp as ever," Discord replied, bowing. "What do you mean, early negotiations?" Moony asked. "Straight to the point, as always," Discord cackled. "Simply put, I'm going to be playing...a bit of a game with your sister and the Harmony Bearers, and I'd like you to stay out of it." Moony raised an eyebrow. "And why would I do that?" she asked. "Oh, I think I can come up with something..." he replied, snapping his talons. On the other side of the room, two large objects partially materialized. One looked like a giant mechanical eye, while the other Moony recognized as a computer, but with many screens. What left her with a dropped jaw, however, was the images on the screens. Each was one of the games from the arcade. "How...what?" she gasped. Discord grinned widely. "Not the original cabinets, of course," he pointed out. "But as a player, you won't know the difference. Perhaps this...reconnection is worth your cooperation?" Moony thought for a time, then nodded. "In exchange for this, I will not assist my sister or the Harmony Bearers in defeating you," she promised. Besides, she thought silently, I can easily take you myself afterwards. Grinning widely, Discord snapped his talons, making the machines finish materializing. The intro animations began playing, just like she remembered from the arcade. "Nice doing business with you," Discord cackled. "I'll leave you to your memories." With that, he vanished. Walking forward, Moony put her hooves on the controls, moving the cursor around until she'd selected Fix-it-Felix Jr. She began to play the game, controlling Felix to jump up and up towards the top of the building, fixing it as he went. However, as she approached the top, she decided...not to finish the game. She let Felix leap from the building. When the game over screen came up, she saw the three letter input for the high score. Out of a surge of nostalgia, she input 'NMM'. Suddenly every sprite on all the screens froze, turning towards the screens. Ralph suddenly leapt off the building, racing out the left side of the screen. Before long, he appeared in Soul Calibur. "Moony?" he called out. "Is that you?" Moony fell back out of her chair. "D-D...Daddy?" Suddenly all the sprites were clamoring at the screens, all the familiar faces, somehow all there. Zero.exe, Nightmare, Vanellope, Tara Gum, Calhoun, Felix, Wily...everyone eagerly calling out to her, so happy to see her again. She staggered backwards, tears in her eyes at this reunion. She bumped against the other machine. "ENCOM Realizer active," the machine intoned. "Connection to emulated games established. Please select a sprite to Realize." "Realize?" Moony asked in confusion. "Ralph, what does-" "Selection confirmed," the machine stated as the eye glowed. "Sprite designate 'Ralph' isolated." On the screen, Ralph was suddenly zapped with a blue light, vanishing bit by bit, byte by byte. "Daddy!" Moony screamed out in fear. "Sprite fully assimilated and encoded," the machine proclaimed. "Beginning Realization." A laser shot out from the eye, first tracing a 2D line grid, then making it 3D. It then began filling in the grid cell by cell. When it was finished, Wreck-it-Ralph staggered a bit. "Moony?" he asked, shocked. "Daddy!" Moony screamed out, rushing forward to bury herself against his chest. Immediately, his arms wrapped around her, and they held each other close. After nearly an hour of just holding each other close - and Wily muttering as he analyzed the digital end of the Realizer - Ralph finally managed to speak up. "So...this is your game?" he asked, looking around. "Not a game, Daddy," she replied. "It's a user world." "Wow," Ralph gasped in amazement. "That...must have come as a shock." "You have no idea," Moony agreed. "Especially considering how much of it felt like a game, and how close it was to what Stan wrote out for me." "Nice digs!" Vanellope called from the screen, glancing around. "What's your role if you've got a place like that?" Moony chuckled. "Well, I went from conquering tyrant Queen to benevolent Princess to President-for-Life." Vanellope chuckled and flashed her a thumbs up. "And...are the clouds supposed to be pink and raining brown?" Ralph asked, staring out the window. Reaching out the window, he grabbed at a passing cloud, surprised that he actually managed it. He took a taste. "Cotton candy raining chocolate milk? But this isn't Sugar Rush!" "No," Moony replied. "It's the work of yet another threat to the country...but I agreed not to assist the heroes of the land in fighting him, in exchange for him making this-" She gestured to Ralph, the Realizer, and the computers. "-possible." "Oh," Ralph replied. "These heroes..." "My sister and some close friends," Moony replied. Ralph blinked, then grinned widely. "I didn't agree." Moony blinked at his statement...and her answering grin was vicious. "You see," Discord explained to Twilight and her friends, "this is the first rule of the game. No flying...and no magic!" "But that's not fair!" Fluttershy complained, stomping her hoof. "You're doing both!" The other ponies murmured in agreement. Discord grinned. "Oh? And what are you going to do about it?" Fluttershy took a deep breath and opened her mouth wide. "I'M GONNA WRECK IT!" She gasped in shock. "Did...did I say that?" Discord backed up in shock and confusion. "What the-" Something slammed into Discord from above, creating a massive crater beneath him from the impact. When the dust settled, Ralph stood up, stepping back from Discord and cracking his knuckles. "Had enough?" he asked. Discord shook himself off and pulled himself together. Literally, as the impact had caused his mismatched parts to fall apart. "What do you think you're doing?" he demanded. "Saving the day," Ralph replied, punching him hard enough to make him fall apart again. Angrily, Discord pulled himself back together. "This is my game...not yours!" Pulling a massive fireball out of the air, he hurled it at Ralph, only for it to bounce off a blue energy barrier. Discord's eyes popped. "You said you wouldn't interfere!" "No," Moony replied as the smoke cleared. "I said I would not assist Celestia and the others. Ralph made no such promise." "And what do you call this?" Discord demanded, gesturing at the energy field. "Assisting Ralph," she replied. "You'll notice the others are no longer fighting you." Turning, Discord saw this was fact. Twilight and the others were sitting back to watch while Spike and a few Cybugs gave them popcorn. "But...but that's sophistry!" "Of course," Moony replied. "I'm a politician." "That's not fair!" Discord complained. "What did you expect?" Turning, Moony bucked Discord in the face with both hind hooves. "I'm bad!" Discord staggered, and found himself face to face with Ralph. "And that's good!" Ralph proclaimed, punching Discord in the gut. Flipping head over heels, he found himself face to face with Chrysalis. "I will never be good," she purred, delivering her own double hind hoof buck, this time to his crotch. Clutching his injury, Discord wobbled around...and found himself facing Sombra. "And that'ssssss...not bad," he hissed, sending a bolt of dark magic through Discord. A familiar whirring noise filled the air, and Wily's saucer lowered. Raising up out of it, he primed all the weapons as all the other sprites showed up. "There's no one I'd rather be...than me," he purred, grinning wickedly. Discord whimpered. "That just ain't fair..." he pouted. At that moment, two karts pulled up: "The Precious Gift" and "Dream Eater". "Sorry," Vanellope said as she primed an ice cream launcher from her kart. "We don't give a fuck," Calhoun finished, stepping out of "Dream Eater" with her machine gun. Ten very brutal minutes later, Discord lay back on the ground, his body resembling Swiss cheese and a white flag held over his head, twitching occasionally. Moony, meanwhile, introduced Twilight and the others to the joys of kart racing.