Cheese Sandwich Gets a 'Real Job'

by PensacolaRanger


Chapter 6 - The Breakfast Flub

Early the next morning…before anypony else rose…Cheese Sandwich rolled his eyes open, yawned & stretched, and got out of bed. He felt…good. REALLY good.. He even shook his head & tail bandages off. He wandered to the nearest mirror and checked himself all over. Not a burn scar left. “Wow…” he whispered. “(Heh) Must’ve been something I ate." he joked.

No doubt about it, Cheese was feeling like his old self again. Well…minus the Cheesy Sense.

“Aw…Gods bless Pinkie Pie and all her friends. The best friends anypony could have. They deserve something really special from me. Hmm…but what, exactly?” He thought. And thought. Then…an idea came to him. With no Cheesy Sense tingling.

Deciding he’d slept enough, in spite of the early hour, he tip-hoofed down to the kitchen. Carefully, so as not to make any loud noises to wake the others, he poked through the cabinets and other stores, for something to fix for breakfast. Not just for himself, but for Pinkie Pie and her friends, too. If he was going to work in a kitchen today anyway, he might as well get into practice right now.

“Today, I'll make breakfast for them!" he declared. Hmm…but what to make?

Cheese rummaged some more, until he found…what looked like…a large economy-sized box of…cold cereal? Well..at least it was something he didn’t have to cook, remembering he wasn’t all that experienced at the stove. He nosed through the refrigerator, and found what he presumed was…a milk jug? “Okay…now for bowls…spoons…and…juice?” he said, supervising himself.

He soon found apple juice…some assorted fruits to put in a big bowl…and…what else, oh, yes…bread & butter, for toast. The toaster itself seemed simple enough to operate, so he could cook that much. How hard could toast be, compared to party pizza?

***

Soon, as Luna’s Moon set and Celestia’s Sun rose, the Mane 6 began to stir awake. Fluttershy could already pick up a
pleasant aroma wafting through the air. “(*Sniff-sniff*) Hmm…I smell something yummy…” Her mouth began to water.

Twilight noticed it, too. “(*Sniff*) Hmm…say, you’re right. Is that…breakfast?" she wondered.

“(*Gasp*) Wait a minute…I usually make breakfast! What in tarnation---?” Applejack began, sitting up in bed.

But before AJ could finish her sentence…they all heard…accordion music. Sounded like..."A Walk Thru White-Tail Woods."
“Rise and shine, Ponies!” Cheese called in singsong, “It’s a beautiful morning, and breakfast is on the table! COME AND GET IT!”

“(*Gasp*) Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh---WHEE! It worked, Twilight! It worked, it worked, it worked! He’s all better now, and he’s made breakfast for us! YES-YES-YES-YES-YES! Come on, everypony, let’s GO! WHEE!” Pinkie babbled as she bounced out of bed and spring-bounced in her usual fashion, out the bedroom door, downstairs to the Mane Dining Hall.

“(*Grrr*) He’d better not have made a mess of my kitchen, like he did in the Mane Hallway on party night…” Applejack grumbled, as she fetched her tan Studson cowpony hat and cocked it into place on her blonde-maned head.

“Well…this is Cheese Sandwich we’re talking about, girls.” said Rarity, “I mean, it can’t possibly be any worse than that atrocious dinner party with Discord a while back, can it? Heh-heh!”

“Ecch! tell me about it…” said Rainbow Dash. “My lap is still stinging from that hot gravy boat incident! Ouch…”

“Hmph! Well, it worked, didn’t it?” said Fluttershy back in brave mode, as she confidently combed her mane with a hoof-brush. “Discord reformed. If he can do it, anypony can. Even Cheese Sandwich. He was kind enough to get up early and do this for us. That’s saying something positive about him. Let’s give him a chance.”

“Agreed. Come on, ponies, I’m starving…” Twilight commanded.

“Here-here,” Spike concurred, “I mean, compared to Discord, how bad can Cheese Sandwich be?”

As soon as he said those words, Spike wished he hadn’t. That was clearly an open invitation for trouble.

***

Soon, one by one, the mares of Princess Twilight’s Court of Friendship made their way down to the Mane Dining Hall. Cheese had breakfast all laid out on the Grand Table, in 8 respective place settings: Twilight, Spike, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and himself. Each placing--except Spike's---had a glass of milk, glass of apple juice, a plate of buttered toast, and a bowl of crunchy oat cereal all ready & waiting. For Spike instead of cereal, his bowl was filled with colorful gems. (Cheese remembered that about dragons, having worked a few dragon parties, too.) Not as grand as Pancakes a la Applejack, but hey, a kitchen pony’s got to start somewhere.

Cheese himself was clad in chef’s hat & apron, same as Pinkie Pie the day before, and squeeze-boxing a morning serenade, while trotting a graceful waltz on his hind-hooves. “Friends, ponies, country-mares*…breakfast is served." he repeat-announced, finishing on
accordion.

“WHEE!” squealed Pinkie Pie as she bounced up to her placing. “Come on, everypony, eat up!"

One by one, the ponies took their places, eyes wide with delight.

“Well, well…nice job, Cheese!” said Twilight. “I can see this day is off to a great start.”


“Umm…might ‘wanna hold that thought, Sugar cube…” said a dubious Applejack, as she noticed something strange
about the cereal. She turned her head and opened one green eye wide in a sidelong glance (like a magnifying lens.)

Mildly alarmed, Pinkie and Cheese craned toward AJ. Pinkie’s ears began to twitch. “Uh-oh…” she whispered.


There were tiny dark specs on the O’s of oat cereal. They seemed odd to Applejack.

“Huh? What’s wrong?” Twilight inquired.

Then Rainbow Dash noticed something strange at her own placing: a faint sour odor in the air. She sniffed a few times.
It was coming from the milk glass. “What the hay?” she queried. Curiously, she turned her head sideways, clutched the
glass of milk in her teeth---and quickly turned it 180 degrees to land upside-down on the table with a sound CLINK!

Twilight turned her head to see. “Rainbow Dash, what’re you doing?”

Dash righted her head, taking the glass up with it in her teeth. The milk did not spill.
Instead…it was standing up on the table, in a gelatinous, jiggling mound, shaped like the glass!
Mouth agape, she let the glass fall back on the table. It didn’t break but clunked, fell over, and rolled a bit.

“EWWW…!!” said a repulsed Rarity, "CURDLED MILK! Disgusting!” She recoiled and backed away from the table!
“Oh, my…” said Fluttershy, as she and everypony else also backed away.

All but Applejack, still scrutinizing her cereal bowl. Then she gasped, as one of the specs…moved.
Then another, and another, and another…until the entire bowl was swarming with them!

"ANTS!" she neighed, and nearly galloped backwards from the table! “Meep…” said a quailing Fluttershy.

“Uh-ohh…” said Cheese, cringing as his ears, mane & tail drooped, and his accordion emitted a chord of sour notes.

Then AJ glanced back at her glass of apple juice: oily-looking and thick as pie-filling! And the toast…moldy.
And the butter…too far-gone to even bother describing. The assorted fruits in the bowl at table-center, had also gone bad.

“Somethin’ must’a gone wrong with the fridge last night! Come on, Rarity…” Applejack commanded as she galloped
through the kitchen double-doors.

“But I don’t understand, I cast that chilling spell myself; it was perfectly fine…” Rarity babbled, following AJ.
Rainbow Dash & Fluttershy followed suit, flying close behind.


Impatient (and still quite hungry) Twilight Sparkle glowered stormily at Cheese, who wilted apologetically.

“Everything looked fine in there this morning to me, I swear!” he tried, awkwardly.

But Pinkie Pie smiled her widest SQUEE grin, and started babbling:
“Oh, gee--look at the time-it’s getting late-come on, Cheese-we ‘gotta get over to Sugarcube Corner--NOW!!"

Pinkie grabbed Cheese by the mane with her teeth (he dropped the accordion) and they both galloped at top speed out of the Dining Room double doors, to quickly vacate the castle!

“CHEESE SANDWICH, PINKIE PIE, YOU TWO COME BACK HERE RIGHT THIS---THIS… (*Groan*) Oh, forget it…”

Twilight knew she could just teleport right in front of them outside the castle and give them a stern taking-to, saying: "This ISN'T OVER, you two! I SWEAR I'm going to get to the BOTTOM of this! You'd better SHAPE UP, Cheese Sandwich; you've got only 25 DAYS LEFT!" then teleport away again.

But…thinking better of it, she let it go and looked over at Spike----the only one in the castle this morning with a full breakfast to feed on---happily munching his gems.

“(*Gulp*) Oh, well…I stand corrected.” he said, shrugging his shoulders.

Rolling her eyes, Twilight levitated one small amethyst stone from the bowl, and popped it into her mouth.

“Wow…you can eat gems too, now?” asked Spike, wondering if she’d cast a gem-eating spell on herself.

“(*Nom-nom*) No…but I can suck on one, can’t I?” she answered, wiping a slobber of hungry drool from her mouth with a hoof, as she swabbed the rock around on her tongue, wishing it were rock-candy. "(*Sigh*) At least until I can come up with an alternative plan for breakfast this morning..." she thought to herself.

Spike shrugged. “It’s your castle…” he affirmed.


***


“(*Whew*) That was a close one, Pinks. For a moment there, I thought Twilight was going to have me for breakfast!”
said Cheese, as the two party ponies approached the Sugarcube Corner bakery.

“(*Giggle*) Don’t be silly, Cheese! Twilight may be lots of things, but she's no cannibal!" said Pinkie Pie.

“I ‘dunno; the way she was looking at me, she seemed ready to eat me alive!" Cheese shuddered.

“Oh, she’s always cranky in the morning, especially when she’s really-really hungry for breakfast.” Pinkie explained rapidly, “…and speaking of breakfast…” now she turned serious, “…what you should’ve done in the kitchen before preparing anything, was check the freshness dates on all the food stocks. When the dates expire, food spoils really fast, even in the fridge. That’s why it’s a good idea to keep an open box of baking soda in there. I mean gee-whiz, Cheese, how did you live for so long on your own without knowing that?"

“I’ve…just never really had to think about it before.” Cheese answered in his own defense.
Pinkie sounded so much like his mother right now.

“Hmm, speaking of the fridge…” Cheese remembered, “…didn’t Applejack say she suspected something went wrong with it last night? Yet when I got up, everything looked perfectly fine to me. If only my Cheesy Sense had been working, I would’ve known something was up…”

Pinkie adamantly shook her head. “Cheese…you can't tell with food just by appearances. You really have to check the dates.
That’s what the Cakes taught me. I mean, I can’t begin to tell you how many times whole ingredient packages had to be thrown out because of expired dates, or because of ants in the pantry. I mean, that’s bad for business…”

“That’s another thing Applejack mentioned…” Cheese continued, “…ants in the cereal. I may not be an exterminator or an architect, but…how can ants manage to get into a crystal castle?"

“Hmmm…that is strange…” Pinkie agreed, “…and coming from me, that’s really saying something! But…let’s not think about that right now. Time to clock in for work. Remember, Cheese…you’re my assistant-in-training!" She batted her baby-blue eyes and SQUEE-grinned up at him.

“(*Groan*) I can hardly wait…” said a bewildered Cheese Sandwich.




[CONTINUED NEXT CHAPTER]