//------------------------------//
// Chapter 24 Into the Mind of a Man 
// Story: My Daughter Chrysalis 
// by Scarheart 
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Iopened my eyes, trying to dissect what had just happened to me. Blinking away the disorientation, I noted I could not feel my body as I normally could. Memory served up the fading vision of her horn lighting up and to sometimes-too-serious expression I had come to know and love.

        Oh.

        She put me to sleep, Princess Luna.

        “Wha—?” Shaking my head, the surroundings I found myself in were...strange. “Huh?”

        “They’re frantically trying to find you,” said an unfamiliar voice somewhere to my left. “It would appear your father’s mind is a grand mansion filled with many rooms. So many memories.”

        I whipped around, immediately on my hooves and in a defensive stance. Wings buzzed in irritation. “Who’s there?” For some reason, I could not make out my landscape. Everything was blurry and out of focus. My eyes kept trying to blink. It was very disorienting.

        A shadowy figure slowly materialized some distance away. Or was it right in front of me? It was tall, distinctly feminine. Humanoid. Well, human.

        Human?

        “Tabitha?” I growled, baring my teeth.

        “No,” came the amused reply. “I am much older than my daughter.”

        The form solidified, stepping forward on bare, charcoal black feet. They were dainty, the legs shapely like a ballerina’s. She wore a simple dress covering her knees. It was modest, though still managed to accent her curves tastefully. Her hair spilled over her shoulders, a mix of white and green, with little braids in front of each pointed ear. Large, emerald eyes blazed softly, hypnotically. Her face was a perfect oval, her lips not quite full and dark red. I took a guess she was somewhere between a C cup and a B. The dark woman was also quite short, barely over five feet tall. 

        I could look her in the eye. She was beyond exotic in the beauty department.

        As my observation of her physical form was going on, another part of my brain started screaming at my conscience, banging on the thick door as loudly as possible. No, it didn’t quite click yet who I was looking at. The woman’s words were telling me I should know who she was by what she had just said.

        “I have not seen you in a very long time,” cooed the woman as she slowly made her way to me. Her steps were slow, as though she were approaching an easily spooked horse. I found I could not move as my eyes were locked on hers. “So very long. You look well, Chrysalis. Very healthy. A second nymph stage. Or foalhood.” She smirked gently, lifting her right hand. Her ebony skin was flawless. Her nails were perfect. Not too long and sculpted with expert detail.

        The touch to my muzzle was electrifying. I gasped, flinched...or tried to.

        “I find I like the human form. Though the color choices of the skin is a bit lacking,” she admitted as she slowly petted my muzzle. “The fingers are a wonderful set of tools. Opposable thumbs...such a marvelous example of evolutionary domination done as simply as possible.”

        Those eyes bore into me as she scrunched her face into an impish smile.

        “Let me see your human form, child.”

        Without my help, my body decided to morph, shimmering and altering. My forehooves shrank, narrowed. I rose up on my rear legs as they changed. There was no pain, nor was there the usual feelings of discomfort. The first time I had changed into a human girl was not the only time. I had practiced for months, trying to find the perfect form that suited me. Changelings can’t just turn into anything on a whim. It’s a lot easier when it’s another creature that has a base form similar to ours. Bipedal forms bring up a lot of inner body complications I had never anticipated.

        In short, I fell down a lot when Daddy wasn’t in the house and I was trying to practice walking as a human. Frustrating. As. Hell.

        The form I took was the one Daddy was eventually shown. I was a little taller, as I must have had a bit of a growth spurt since the last time I had it. Did changeling disguises age along with the user or was it an effort for us to keep up appearances? 

        I was upright now, as a human. Naked.

        The dark woman took a step back, fingers curled around her chin. Her eyes inspected me with scrutinizing darts. Slowly she made her way around me, taking in every aspect of my being. It was embarrassing.

        “A little taller. A hair over a hundred pounds. Still a wisp of a thing. Developing quite nicely. Your mane looks lovely. Why the pale skin? Pale pink, actually. So plain. So...blah." The dark woman made a face.

        I tried to retort. Nothing came out of my mouth.

        “Of course you can’t speak. I placed a silence spell upon you the moment my fingers touched your muzzle. Be still and let me look at you, child.”

        I could feel her fingers tracing over my arms, over my shoulders. She hummed as she moved, poking me every now and then.

        “You need to eat more,” she observed. “I suppose you are still developing physically, but you really do need wider hips. Males are attracted to females with wider hips. It suggests you are physically capable of bearing a child.”

        Then, as my face was brightly lit up with flames, she was in front of me. The smile she wore was somewhere between motherly and predatory with a dash of creepy thrown in for the hell of it.

        ...motherly?

        Something in the back in my mind clicked, accompanied by something akin to a ‘finally!’. There may or may not have been sarcastic clapping involved.

        “Call me Mom, dear,” said the dark woman with a smile.

        And then she hugged me.

        In a dreamscape, sensations can be controlled. They can be muted or intensified, but to a certain degree. Luna once told me such things are necessary to maintain the host awareness’ attention either away or towards you. A good practitioner, she had said, could mask herself from the dreamer and walk with impunity throughout the mind of the host. A master could bring a guest, as Luna had once done for me. Back then, she was proving a point she was always watching me, waiting for me to show any potential reversion of what I once was.

        The woman was at least as good as Luna.

        “I want you to just listen and follow. There is much to discuss. We also must do something about this human’s mind. It is an absolute mess. We will walk. I will talk. You will listen. As we do this, we will repair the damage done by my daughters— your sisters —and hopefully restore your father. It may require removing some of his memories. So long as we stay out of the Dreamscape, Luna will not detect us. I will be shielding the both of us from her. You will not be able to use your magic, dear. I love you, but I do not trust you. I imagine you would at this moment prefer to be with the princess. Luna, I believe would have wanted to guide you on this journey. But her realm is of dreams. It is not of the mind. That is my specialty.”

        With a flick of her wrist and a snap of her finger, I felt my body relax. I stumbled a little to regain my footing. Another wave of her hand and I was clothed in shorts and a tee shirt. My feet remained uncovered, like hers. I did not like being poked and prodded like a slab of beef. Glowering, I did my best to melt the woman with my stare.

        Sadly, it did not work.

        “Firstly, I know your thoughts. You must learn to control your emotions. You do not understand the grand scheme of what I have planned. You have your role to play. You have played it magnificently, to this point. As has your father. I have the gift of clairvoyance, to a degree. Celestia is also gifted. Luna, on a smaller scale. All alicorns do. It is one of the prices we pay for immortality. I suspect both Cadence and Twilight will grow into the gift as they pass their natural life spans and begin their immortal journeys.”

        I gave her a questioning look.

        “I adapt to what happens around me. I adjust. I was distraught when I thought you had been driven to madness. You disappeared. I mourned. A year later, you returned. But before then, I discovered what had happened to you and had you watched.” Her eyes drifted up and around. “Come. We must not dawdle. There is much to be done. Time is relative in a mind, but it still goes forward. Never backward. We will go to the library. Most of his memories are there. If we see anything broken, we will try to fix it.”

        She waved her hand again, and I was free.

        “Stay close. Do not wander. If you do not know what you are doing, you could very well cause more harm to your father’s mind than good, despite your intentions.”

        Again, I tried to say something. Again, it felt as though I was trying to talk through a brick wall in my mouth. I stumbled on faltering steps, completely not used to walking.

        “It’s mind walking, not the physical thing,” said the woman. Daddy called her Sil. I will think of her as Sil. “Just move one foot in front of the other. The adjustment won’t be as tedious as if you were actually in human form.”

        Reluctantly, I did just that and nearly tripped over my own noobness. An arm caught out and fingers grasped at my shoulder and arm to steady me. Sil laughed. It was a deceptively happy sound. I felt as though she really meant to eat my soul at some point. I mean, I was beginning to become aware of how powerful she might be. And this was a mental projection I was feeling this from!

        I padded after her on bare feet that made no sound on the wooden floors. As I realized I was walking on a floor, a room took shape around me. A sense of familiarity washed over my senses. I looked around and saw pictures on the wall. Photographs. Daddy not in them, but they were people I assumed he knew. Immediately I made out his parents and his sister, saw images of people I did not know but felt he did.

        “This house represents his memories, his hopes, his dreams and even his fears.” Sil guided me by the hand down a hallway. The lighting was low to the point of giving everything an orange dimness. “We will find what is loose. We will put things where they belong. My daughters were sloppy. The minion was sloppy. Your father’s mind was to have been observed and categorized so we might understand humans better. He is the first.” She straightened a picture frame. The photo was one of me, little and in a bathtub filled with bubbles. I was a cute kid, I noted.

        “My daughters. They are inconsiderate at times. I tell them to do something and they harm those I do not wish to see harmed.” We entered into a room. Judging from the shelves and furniture, it was a library. Books lay strewn across the floor. The ceiling had a single chandelier lit up with candles. There were wooden reliefs carved in intricate shapes and radiating from the only source of light.

        I did not like what she was implying.

        “In Canterlot, I touched his mind for the first time after a foolish changeling tried to discover the owner of the magic he had sensed. As your mind was guarded, the servant could not get into your mind. He found a way when he discovered the link between you and the human. Human minds cannot handle intrusions.”

        She leafed through the pages of a book she had scooped up from the floor, her golden eyes drinking in the contents of the pages. Gold? I thought they were green. And why did she choose an elf form? A dark elf, on top of that. Was that the dress I had worn for Daddy? No, she was six inches shorter than me. Same color. A bit more on the sexy side.

        I had more modest tastes.

        Why are you looking at me like that? I do.

        Sil closed the book and ran her fingers over its spine. Her expression was unreadable until she lifted her chin and gave me a smile. “I have come to respect your father, Chrysalis. My agents have been watching him ever since it was discovered where you had been sent.” A somber cloud darkened her already dark features. “I nearly lost my mind searching for you. Did you know your losses had thrown you into the pits of madness? So many minds had been linked to you for the battle, the sudden extinguishment of so many rent you. You had regarded them as your children, offering them a kingdom on a platter if they but did one simple thing and give you a chance to strike down the Sun and the Moon while they were unawares.”

        Her eyes glazed over, assuming a distant stare. “I punished those who had turned against you. While it was true I did not want you to succeed, I was beyond angry when you were rendered destitute through the loss of your army. Your hive was broken the moment your mind was shattered. Tens of thousands who regarded you as queen suddenly found themselves Grays.” Slowly, she placed the book on one of the shelves, moving with slow, seamless grace.

        “I am hard on my children. I must be. I turn them on each other, or else they would loose themselves upon the world. I must be a monster to contain the monsters I have created. I love them, but I fear what they would do if I could not reign them in.” Sil bent and picked up another book, this one thicker. “Oh, you can start picking up. His memories are here. The ones that help define who he is. This is as good a place as any to begin helping him. This is as good a place as any for me to make amends, if such a thing is possible.”

        I did so, my thoughts a jumble. For what seemed an eternity, I picked up books and helped the strange changeling-turned-fantasy elf sort out Daddy’s memories. Sil did not add to her explanation and I could not ask her. My lips were sealed. Why was she telling me all of this? I did not remember her. I did not view her as my mother.

        She looked like a fantasy elf, for crying out loud! Oddly enough, a short one.

        Every once in a while, I would steal a glance at the woman. Even though she was not in her changeling form, she still had an air of authority I had only seen in Celestia or Luna. The aura she radiated was unmistakable, nor did she bother to mute it like the alicorns did. She wanted me to feel her power. She wanted me to know exactly who she was.

        But in Daddy’s mind? Here? Why?

        I reeled, partially glad I could not speak. What would or what could I say to her? It was like discovering your mother was in truth an evil lich queen who was going out of character to be nice to you and the family who had raised you...for what?

        She was up to something. But, supposedly what we were doing was helping Daddy, though I had a really hard time picturing the recesses of his memories being confined in what appeared to be a mansion I remember from the old Westerns Daddy and I used to watch on television.

        If you’re still reading this, then you must know I’ve written all of this after the fact. Piggy backing Daddy’s writing is a bit weird and he insisted I pick up where he had left off. Or haven’t you noticed? Keep in mind, I am scared shitless at this point. I’m in my father’s head, listening to a woman who’s fiddling around with his memories and talking as though she and I are the bestest of friends.

        I seriously think I hate her. She’s toying with me. She’s toying with Daddy.

        She’s also implying Celestia and Luna are idiots, and in a familiar way. Did she know them? Were they aware of her beyond the farce of peaceful intent the changeling empress clung to like a starving tick in the ass of a deer? I was not sure, but…

        Sil motioned ‘come hither’ with a hand at me, her fingers curling slowly, beckoning as her eyes settled upon an oversized book at her feet. She levitated it with her other hand. I approached and she turned to me. The book opened. I peered in and noticed it was a photo album. The pictures were all of me. Sil slowly leafed through the pages, her eyes drinking in every detail in every image, an unreadable visage. I was still mildly disturbed by the ‘come hither’ thing. There was nothing sexual about it, but the motion was more of a master beckoning his dog than a mother motioning her child over.

        Bitch.

        “Oh,” she cooed. “You were adorable. If only cameras had been available when you were but a hatchling.” Sil’s eyes were misting. Misting!

A finger caressed a picture of me in the tub, covered in bubbles. I was staring up at Daddy, apparently in the throes of deciding if bubble baths were fun or not. The page turned, and there were more embarrassing baby pictures of me. The humanized changeling empress squealed in delight as her eyes fell open each new photo, taken directly from my dad’s memories.

        Without looking up from her perusing, she said in the form of an afterthought, “You may speak. One question and one question only. Do I make myself clear?” Golden eyes flicked at me and held until I nodded under a cloud of trepidation.

        Of course, the first question was for me the most obvious. “Why a drow?”

        The expression on her face briefly flashed really? before she sighed and closed the photo album. Sil did not answer, taking a moment to place the album onto the bookshelf and letting her fingers slide down wistfully along the spine. “Your father has certain...fantasies he still plays out in his mind. He happens to take a fancy to exotic females. I believe this one was from a...tabletop game of some sort. A... dark elf, I presume. Picking through your father’s head has been...educational, to say the least. I had no idea such a common human would have such a vivid imagination. Did you know he drew as a child and into his teenage years? Quite good, actually. A talent, completely developed without outside assistance. I should imagine he might have been a successful artist if he had the courage back then to pursue his dreams.” Sil shrugged. “His choice of a military life was more of a search for employment rather than a need to serve his nation.”

        I mulled that over, recalling Daddy’s desk in his room. He still doodled on occasion. Nothing of his interest in drawing had ever been pressed to my ears. The man still had secrets, even if it involved paper and pencils. Well, he still drew his World of Warcraft characters. Females, all of them. 

        Forever alone.

        Well, the jokes on the meme as Daddy has me and another daughter. At least he helped make Crystal. Which brought to mind another question. I opened my mouth to ask it, but my throat felt constricted and no sound dared utter itself from my lips. Mommy magicked my mouth shut.

        Oh, goodie.

        The glare I threw her would have melted adamantium, but she guided me along and pointed at the books scattered on the floor. “Start picking them up. They are in chronological order. Simple. You’ll know them apart by simply picking them up.”

        I’m sorry, but where in the manual did it say fiddling with someone’s noodle was simple? On top of that, what bloody manual? A human mind is a terrible wasteland. Daddy’s mental man cave belonged more to a bachelor who tried too hard to pick up women.

        Hey, Daddy would have found it funny!

        Without thinking too much further into the subject of what makes my daddy’s mind tick, I crouched down and began gathering up nondescript books. As I scooped them up, I began to realize there was nothing printed on the covers nor the spines. They looked like the sort of books you’d find in an old nineteenth century Victorian library. As I stood, Bigfoot materialized in a plush chair reading a rather large copy of Guns and Ammo and looking at me through a monocle.

        “Quite,” he said, before disappearing into the recesses of Daddy’s mind in a swirl of smoke, leaving behind nothing but an empty chair and a neglected magazine.

        Where the hell did that come from?

        I was about to point out something to Sil, standing up and pointing with one free hand. I tried to speak, but Sil’s words came back as nothing came out of my mouth. I don’t think I was prepared for what was to come next. Her face was impassive, but her eyes had become saucers. Her body had gone rigid and magic crackled in swirling green and gold hues about her frame. A hand went to her lips.

        “Oh, my.”

        I stepped towards her, clutching the book.

        “You shouldn’t be here. You shouldn’t even be aware!” she cried, taking a step back.

        From the doorway emerged Daddy, wearing a glowering mask as he strode in like Lazarus from the grave. It was as though he was angry death had eluded him and he wore the images of his most haunting life experiences within his eyes.

        “Sil,” he spoke with the calm before the storm. “What are you doing here? This is my house.” He blinked. “How do I know who you are? Why do I know who you are? Are we enemies? Are you a friend?” Confusion clouded about him and he swayed on his feet unsteadily. Daddy found me. “Chryssie? Pumpkin?”

        I flew to him, flinging my arms around his neck and hugging him for all I was worth. I felt his pain! I felt all of it! It was soul crushing and I knew why. With the waves of pain came his memories of having his mind raked for information on how to use human weapons. Behind those rolled every moment when Daddy took a life as nonchalantly as one would pluck a flower from a bush. His agony became mine and I wept. So much sorrow! It was as though his world would shatter and drown everything in the tears of his despair!

        How long did we cling to each other? I don’t know. It could have been forever and I tried everything I could to take his pain away. Daddy had enough of it in his life. He deserved to be happy! He deserved to be left alone! I was his purpose! I was his reason for being! I…

        I…

        I…

        Oh, God, I was keeping him from being himself...of being truly free!

        No! It was her influence! Her touch! Her madness! Her children! She! They! All of them!

        I fought against the pressure containing my voice. I raged against it with the fury of a cataclysm! I gathered myself as though I was pushing against the water behind the dam. It would not stop me! “He’s mine!” I shrieked, pushing him away and behind me, facing the Thing that dared to call herself my mother. “I am whole with him! I have no want and no need! I protect him, not you! Never you!”

        She staggered backwards again, clutching her chest as her lips twisted in a snarl. Her hair spilled over her face as she bent, nearly crumpling to her knees. Sil held still, her balance precarious. Her other hand came up, as if to ward me off.

        “Don’t be so difficult,” she hissed. The woman raised her head and I could see from between the strands of her hair her glowing whites. “Child, you know not the power before you. My might cannot be bested by the tantrums of a child.” She straightened, the hand held towards me pointing a finger. “You broke my spell. Impressive.” The smile I saw was not that of a proud mother. It was predatory.

        “Why are you doing this?” I challenged.

        “Why? Because Celestia follows voices in her head! She heeds the words of an oracle read to her so long ago few even know the most minimum of snippets! We all of roles to play in this world and she oversteps her bounds! I must balance everything! I must do what I must to maintain this world’s integrity! The Gods will awaken and I must do what I must to protect my changelings.” Sil took in a deep breath and deflated slowly. “She has grown lax and complacent. She does not know the darkness that will come when the worlds merge. I have spent countless generations preparing my changelings to protect this world from that darkness. I am the lesser of two evils, my daughter. I have purpose and I will fulfill that purpose. Your slate was wiped clean, child. Your purpose is beyond the ken of Equestria’s guardians or mine. Your father, as you see him, has been drawn into this.”

        Sil approached, opening her palm. “You can break the cycle, Chrysalis. You have the power to heal. You have the gift of the Second Sight. You are the Chosen One.”

        I stared at her.

        “Please. I will not influence you. I cannot influence you. But I beg you, come home. Let me look upon you with my own eyes. I wish to restore you to your former power, give unto you that which is your birthright. You must become a Queen, Chrysalis. You must have your hive. You must have your colony returned to you.”

        Her eyes went beyond me. “You, Michael Spriggs. You must return to me my child. Stand her before me, you at her side. Let a mother be reunited with her lost child. There is little I can give you in return, save your daughter.”

        “My what?” Daddy’s voice carried its disbelief.

        “Crystal Spriggs. She lives. She thrives. She thinks of you often and always asks when she can see her father. She knows what her mother did. She does not understand why. Crystal is an intelligent child, remarkably so.” Sil offered a small smile. “My granddaughter is a joy in my life. It was regrettable what my daughter did to you. She followed my orders.”

        There was silence. Uncomfortable silence. I had turned and was trying to read Daddy’s face. Being in his mind while his emotions roiled like a hurricane made me woozy.

        Crystal was alive? Didn't Felu say something to that effect? I think she did. It felt more profound experiencing it a second time. The emotions were overwhelming and could have only come from one source.

        “She’s...my daughter...she’s…” Daddy began to fall forward, his eyes rolling into the back of his head. How he could faint while in his own mind was beyond me, but I was bearing a phantasm weight upon my shoulders, straining to keep a man twice my size upright while in the middle of bleaching his brain.

        No, that isn’t right. That totally came out wrong. But, hey! You try bearing the weight of a man’s imaginary world upon imaginary shoulders while a dark succubus is standing there, staring at the two of you!

        “Stay away!” I yelled as she stepped towards us. I don’t care if she was going to help or start eating faces, she was on my no-mail list for Christmas cards! On top of that, she just admitted she was evil, making her more than likely the prime villainess in this story.

        Or was Felu to blame for all of this? Then there was that anorexic queen that had forced Daddy to do those terrible things to those admittedly terrible pirates.

        “You were not supposed to be aware.” Sil dropped her hand to her side. “You were supposed to be in a state of rest, dreamless while I repaired the damage to your mind. Michael Spriggs, you are a surprising individual.”

        “Why do you look like a dark elf?” Daddy pushed himself off of my shoulders, his fingers giving a squeeze of my shoulders. “I haven’t associated with that stuff since...well…” He faltered, blinking as he tried to focus his mind. “Crystal is alive? The plane. It crashed. Her mother walked away from it. Hundreds died. You? You did this? You did that to so many families? Why? Why would you do something like this?”

        “Get out.”

        I had the sensation of his powerful grip pulling me aside and out of the way. With a roar I never thought possible to come from his throat, he charged, reaching out towards the dark woman. He was swinging a fist, only to meet with empty air as she simply disappeared.

        I cried out to him. He stared at me, his cheeks stained with tears. Daddy roared his frustrations, howling at the ceiling before collapsing to the floor. Clutching his head, he was again a miserable shamble of broken man.

        “I will help you, Mr. Spriggs, whether you want it or not. I cannot allow you near my grandchild with your mind in the state it is. I have given you the truth. I cannot lie. I can mislead, but I cannot tell a falsehood. I hated you, at one time, Mr. Spriggs. I despised the face one of my daughters would love you far more than she loved me. I despised the fact you presumed to be the surrogate father and mother to Chrysalis. I hated you. I watched you. I could do nothing. I would not do nothing. I had power, yet was powerless against you. The bonds you formed with Chrysalis are unlike anything I thought possible between a human and a changeling. I was dubious with the bond you had with Felu. My doubts were broken when I felt Chrysalis back in this world, her mind as it was, but not as it had been.” A pair of eyes, massive and enveloping the very space around us took shape and loomed over us. They were the eyes of a queen, a monster.

        Daddy looked at me, his lips moving, forming words I could not believe. He shook his head, pleading with me.

        No, Daddy!

"I should heal your mind, make it whole. I owe you this much. You have suffered. You have endured more than any human should. You have done things no other human has done. You should have stayed on Earth, but you are here.” Sil’s voice had dropped to a soothing whisper. It was like having a lover sing sweet nothings or a mother’s assurance to a frightened child. She sounded as both in one. It was a horrible thing to experience, to see, to feel.

        Daddy stopped trembling, turning towards that mesmerizing voice. He slowly calmed, until he was simply staring, as if at nothing. I rushed to his side, touching at his face and trying to get him to look at me.

        “He will be fine. I had to put his mind to sleep. Come. There is not much time. No doubt Luna is aware I am here. I can keep her at bay for only so much longer. She may be desperate enough to risk harming him inadvertently.” The woman appeared again from nothing as she had disappeared just moments before.

        “I will restore his daughter to him and send them back to Earth. I think he has earned his daughter. Crystal will stop being upset with me, I think.”

        “Why are you doing this?” I asked.

        “Because I am responsible. His mind is scattered. You witnessed it for yourself. Did he not just ask you to end his life? He still has a purpose. He still has a duty. I have my duties. You will learn yours in time, Chrysalis.”

        “But…”

        “Either help me with him or I shall expel you from his mind. I brought you here to show I mean him no harm, that I am capable of doing something good. I am not some mindless fiend seeking to dominate the world, Chrysalis.”

        Her sincerity was overwhelming. Her stance was submissive. Her voice, pleading.

        I sighed, once again cradling Daddy in my arms. A kiss went to his imaginary forehead. A hug more for myself for good measure. I closed my eyes and contemplated. Finally, I asked, “What do you want me to do?”

        Sil smiled. “I will show you, my daughter.”