Saying goodbye to new friends was not an easy thing to do. After a day of rest and recovery, after a day of good times together, Tarnished Teapot and Maud Pie left behind their friends at a fork in the road. Quakehoof, Flying Grace, Bright Hope, and Storm Blitz were headed to Ponyville, following the road that Tarnish himself had once walked on his way down to Dodge City Junction.
“Maud… I have a confession to make,” Tarnish said as he walked beside Maud in the somewhat cool, but rather humid night air.
“And that is?” Maud turned to look at Tarnish. She saw worry upon his face and Maud let out a little sigh. Tarnish was adorable when he looked worried.
“Those foals… they scared me. I didn’t know how to act around them. And in the back of my mind, I’m freaking out because I know how you feel about family and I know that someday you’re going to want to have a few foals but I’m so scared out of my mind because I don’t know how to act around them or what to do with them and I just feel bad because of everything that happened when I was a foal and now I am disappointed that I am going to hurt you and I—”
“Hush.”
Tarnish, hearing Maud’s soft monotone, hushed. He looked at the earth pony beside him, hoping that somehow, she would make all of this better. Maud had a way of making things better.
“Tarnish, you had a rough foalhood. That does not mean that you will be a bad father. It just means that you don’t know what to do. You never had siblings or much contact with younger foals. So your anxiety is based upon the fact that you are dealing with the unknown.” Maud paused and something that might almost be seen as a smile appeared upon her face, if one squinted hard and used their imagination. “I think you’ll do fine. Just do what you do for me.”
Tarnish sighed, feeling better.
“We don’t need to worry about that for a while.” Maud’s somewhat curly mane bounced as she walked and her tail did much the same. “But you do realise… we are going to have to cross that bridge at some point. Pinny Lane deserves to make up for lost time and my mother has dropped not so subtle hints that she wants grandfoals. Soon. Maybe someday… but for now, we have work to do.”
“I like this… life on the road. This isn’t so bad. I’ve heard stories about how much hard work it is… but I like it.” Tarnish looked up at the stars overhead and then back at the road in front of him.
“It’s a lot nicer when you have somepony with you,” Maud said to Tarnish.
Froggy Bottom Bogg was a damp, fetid place. The road was narrow and the ruts weren’t very deep. Not much traffic came along this stretch of highway. Overhead, trees formed a canopy and hanging moss dangled down. On the other side of Froggy Bottom Bogg was the Ghastly Gorge. The highway skirted along the far southern edge of Froggy Bottom Bogg, but sections of the highway were still fairly swampy.
Tarnish was already miserable. It was humid and biting flies descended upon him and Maud in swarms. Clouds of mosquitoes filled the air. Tarnish, who had been reading his magic primer almost daily, had taken to using a static discharge spell to try to deal with the bugs, killing off hundreds at a time, but more kept coming, an endless army of biting flies and blood suckers. Maud, who had a much longer tail, whipped it around to keep flies from landing.
The air was sticky and stinky. The scent of stagnant water hung heavy in the air, along with rotting vegetation and other smells of decay. There was a breeze, but it was unpleasant. A southern wind carried with it the stench of the bog. Froggy Bottom Bogg was the place where most of the water of central Equestria drained. The ground here was primarily limestone, and the water of the bog sank down into the earth to fill an aquifer. Maud explained all of this as they traveled, reciting facts on how important this aquifer was for all of Equestria.
“Did you feel that?” Tarnish froze mid-step and looked at Maud. It would be dawn soon and they hadn’t found a suitable place to camp. Tarnish felt it again. The whole earth shook all around them. A growing sense of alarm rose up inside of Tarnish when he saw Maud unhitching herself from the wagon. “What’s going on Maud?”
“Something big. Something real big is causing these seismic shockwaves. To have this much energy traveling through the ground… you’d need something enormous,” Maud replied as she freed herself.
The ground shook again and Tarnish felt all of the hairs upon his back stand up. And then, the trembling earth shook and did not stop. In the distance, the sounds of snapping trees could be heard.
“Tarnish, I think we’re in trouble… we might lose the wagon. Let’s try to lead it away. Stay close to me,” Maud said in a voice of utter calm.
Not being a total idiot, Tarnish had long since figured out that the calmer that Maud sounded, the worse the situation was. And with the way that Maud sounded right now, this must be bad. He followed after her as she ran ahead, away from the wagon.
They rounded a bend in the road and a monstrous figure smashed through the treeline to greet them. A four headed hydra hissed, roared, bellowed, and snarled as it charged.
Not knowing what to do, Tarnish lifted up a good sized log on the side of the road and hurled it. It bonked the hydra on one of its four heads, snapping the head back and making the other three heads enraged.
The wagon was behind them, the hydra was in front of them, and Tarnish didn’t know which direction to go. If the wagon got smashed, he and Maud were going to be in a tough spot, but all of this meant surviving the hydra.
One of the heads lunged for Tarnish. The colt sidestepped and could see sharp teeth scant inches out of his peripheral vision. Maud, standing up on two legs, hefted a boulder in her forelegs.
“Don’t you touch him,” Maud said in a calm deadpan. “I’ll kill you… this is the only warning you get.”
As Tarnish ducked away, Maud hurled her boulder at the hydra. It struck the behemoth in the neck with terrific force. One head was ripped away by the impact. The other three heads screamed in fury and agony.
And then, the severed head began to regrow. Now, the hydra had five heads. Three large heads and two smaller heads that grew larger with every moment that passed. One of the heads snapped at Tarnish once more and Tarnish was lucky to get just out of reach as the serrated teeth snapped shut just inches away from his backside.
“I warned you,” Maud said, her eyes narrow slits. “Now, you die.”
Hefting up another big rock she had found at the side of the road, Maud whirled around and then hurled it at the hydra, striking it in the base of its many necks. The hydra howled in pain as it fell back. It stumbled around trying to regain its balance, roaring in fury.
Tarnish turned around just in time to see Maud running at great speed towards the hydra. His heart lept up into his throat. He watched as the largest head shot down, maw open, and then, much to Tarnish’s horror, he watched as Maud was snapped up and swallowed whole. He watched a large lump traveling down the hydra’s neck.
Inside of Tarnish, his rage boiled. So angry that he could not even scream, Tarnish began to tremble with fury. He thought about every horrible thing that had happened in his life. He thought about his many rejections. His banishment. His magic when it was still a curse to him. His mother’s neglect. Dodge City Junction. Being beaten and hung. And now, losing Maud.
Tarnished Teapot boiled over, gritting and grinding his teeth as the hydra worked to swallow the pony that he loved more than life itself. A terrible, horrible, soul burning rage consumed the colt. For a second, Tarnish wondered if this is what dark magic felt like, because he felt something coming up from deep inside of him… something terrible.
The air filled with a keen whistling, very much like a teapot that was boiling over. It took a moment, but Tarnish realised, it was him. He was boiling over. Furious, full of rage, stiff legged, Tarnish stomped towards the hydra with murder on his mind.
One of the heads lunged down to gobble him up. Acting on reflex, Tarnish launched a jet of superheated steam, accompanied by a kaliope shriek of a steam whistle. The flesh on the face of the hydra boiled away as the powerful jet of steam struck it. The hydra jerked its head back and the other heads all began to attack.
Tarnish found that he had more than enough rage to go around. With a fearful toot that sounded like a train’s steam whistle, he released a blast of steam, cooking another hydra head. The hydra screamed in agony as it pulled all of its heads back from Tarnish, who was still boiling over. Steam curled up from his horn.
One of the hydra heads let out a startled gurgle, its eyes going wide. The other heads that had not been scalded did the same, while the steam boiled heads thrashed about. One of the heads let out a pained cry, and then the hydra’s whole body shuddered as Maud punched her way free from the inside. The massive creature crashed down to the ground as Maud emerged, covered in ichor and goo. With a gasp, the hydra died.
“Maud!” Tarnish’s rage died away with an almost deafening toot. He launched himself at Maud, slamming into her at full force, but he didn’t budge her an inch. He threw his forelegs around her and began kissing her face, not caring that she was covered in slime.
“I told you I’d kill you,” Maud said to the dead hydra in a flat deadpan. She sat down in the dirt and wrapped her forelegs around Tarnish. “Are you okay? Are you hurt?”
“I’m fine,” Tarnish replied. He looked Maud over and saw blood. Reaching down, he touched her side, just behind her ribs. “You’re bleeding.”
“The teeth snagged me a bit when he ate me,” Maud said. “It’s minor.”
“I thought I lost you.” Tarnish began sobbing as he pulled Maud as close as possible. “I thought I lost you… I saw you being swallowed.”
“I had to get inside the hydra somehow,” Maud explained, sounding calm and serene, almost as if she had just woken up from a pleasant nap. “It would have kept regrowing heads. Once I was inside, I began punching and kicking until I found its heart. Once I crushed that, it was over.”
“What were you thinking, trying to get swallowed by a hydra? You just about scared me to death! I thought I had lost you forever!” Tarnish snapped, a little of his anger coming back.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t have time to explain it.” Maud pressed her lips against Tarnish’s cheek. “Forgive me. I didn’t mean to scare you… but I couldn’t bear to see you get hurt. You mean everything to me.”
Shaking, Tarnish redoubled his grip around Maud and pressed his face against her neck, not caring at all that she was covered in liquified hydra guts. He didn’t care how she smelled at this moment, which was unpleasant by any set of standards. All Tarnish cared about was that she was alive.
“When I was inside the hydra, I could have swore I heard a train,” Maud said into Tarnish’s ear.
There was no way for either Maud or Tarnish to get clean without using up most of their drinking water. Maud’s smock was ruined, there were several long tears where the hydra’s teeth had grazed her flesh. Tarnish tried to clean Maud’s wounds as best as he could, but what Maud needed was a bath.
“So that was you making choo choo noises,” Maud said as she looked at Tarnish.
“I don’t know what happened, but I think I found my special spell. I was so angry Maud, it scared me. I didn’t know that I could be that angry. At first, I thought I must be casting dark magic or something. The thought of losing you pushed me over the edge.” Tarnish looked at the water barrel. “Maud, we’re going to have to use this water to get cleaned up. I still have a mostly full canteen. You’re filthy and I can’t imagine that the digestive juices from the hydra are doing you or me any good.”
“That’s the only drinkable water we have,” Maud said, glancing over at the wagon.
“Maud, I don’t want you getting an infection.” Tarnish looked Maud in the eye. “There should be enough water for both of us to get cleaned up if we’re careful. “The cuts don’t look too bad, they’re not too deep, but they are worrisomely disgusting right now.”
“We’ll use the water.” Maud heaved a sigh and shook her head. “Hopefully we’ll find some water that isn’t too disgusting to drink.”
“We could always use the mirror to call for help,” Tarnish suggested.
“It’s not that bad just yet.” Maud considered the option. A few days of walking from Ponyville meant that they were just a few hours away as the pegasus flies. “Let’s see how we do on our own. Meanwhile, let’s get cleaned up.”