Gluing on my fake eyelashes as I work, I yawn, beaming as I flip through the pages of my shipping notebook. I skip past the section on pairings, right to the pages of date ideas.
I have a few bookmarked, some I’ve been working on for a while-like a cute play date for Spike and Sweetie Belle, and some more serious dates, you know, roses and candles and all that glamour.
Glancing to the calendar, I try again to make out my messy hand writing. Sunset Cafe, Friday at seven, that much I can make out. It’ll be enough. So long as I can be there to make sure everything goes off with out a hitch, everything will be fine. Speaking of, I’ll be late if I don’t get moving.
Hiding my shipping notebook beneath a pile of fabric, I grab a pink scarf from across the room, floating it around my neck. There. I’m ready to get to work!
The door swings open as I gallop out, beaming as the sun sets over Ponyville, casting a perfectly romantic aura across the sleepy little town. It’s going to be perfect, and maybe those two lucky ponies will fall in love, and I can plan their wedding!
Sighing, I saunter out into the town, enjoying the cool night breeze. The soft wind tosses my lavender curls into my eyes to my annoyance, but if I head back to pick up a hat or some hair accessories now, I’ll be late.
As I trot up to Sunset Cafe, I cast my disguise spell. My mane darkens into a lovely auburn with dark black highlights, and my eyes tingle slightly as they turn into a romantic emerald tone.
Stepping through the open door, I approach the politely smiling mare behind the counter. I clear my throat, speaking softly. “Reservations for Miss Cupid Hearts?” I ask. My voice is slightly deeper now, copying the lilting accent of Sweetie Belle’s friend little Pip.
The mare checks the register in front of her, eyes sliding down the list. “Cupid, Cupid... Ah, Cupid Hearts! Come with me, miss,” she says with a smile, standing. She leads me back into the cafe. Live flowers hang from the ceiling, fading light streaming in through the glass roof. We stop at a small table in a back, out of the way corner. Tipping the kind mare, I take my seat, propping my menu up as to hide my face so I can better watch the date unfold.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see a cyan pegasi huffing as she takes her seat, and I can’t help a smile. Clearly my drunken self knows what she’s doing-it’s been far too long since she’s been on a date.
A stallion in uniform walks over. “I’ll be your waiter tonight, miss. Is there anything I can get you to drink?”
“Just a water, please. But could please take the miss with the rainbow mane a bottle of your finest champagne? I’ll pay, but don’t tell her who did,” I tell him, beaming.
He raises an eyebrow, then pausing, nods. “Of course. I’ll be right on that,” he says, trotting away.
I relax in my seat, adjusting my scarf to lay across my cutie mark, in case Rainbow or her date glances my way.
A while passes, and finally, I can hear the sound of hooves. Glancing up, I can see a tall sky blue unicorn flouncing in. She paused at the table, giving Rainbow Dash a dirty look. “Oh, it’s you.”
“Wait, what? You’re my date?” Rainbow asked in shock, staring across the table at Trixie.
I stare past the menu, my throat catching. Really? I’d made this match? Clearly I’d been more drunk that night than I'd first thought. Grimacing, I cough into the edge of my hoof, grimacing.
“Trixie finds herself just as much annoyed, but she is not one to deny free wine,” the show pony huffs, sitting and magically pouring herself a glass of the champagne I’d ordered from the waiter.
“Yeah, I guess I’m not in the mood to skip our on free booze either,” Rainbow Dash grumbled, grabbing the glass from out of Trixie’s magical field.
The two egomaniacs shared the alcohol, eventually emptying the bottle entirely. Rainbow waved her hoof in the air, trying to call over the waiter. “Bring us another bottle,” she calls, slightly too loudly.
The waiter approached them, bringing a bottle of wine. “Are you sure you wouldn’t like something to eat?” he asks, unsure.
“No, Trixie demands champagne,” the aqua pony announced, tossing her mane. “Only the finest most delicious champagne shall do for the greatest and most powerfullest Tri-” she paused, cut off by a hiccup. “Trixie Lulamoon!” Sighing, the waiter handed off the wine.
I watch as the two mares drown their throats in alcohol, laughing, sharing embarrassing jokes, and generally causing a commotion in the fancy cafe. I chew my lip and look away, pained to watch the date as it goes down the drain.
Finally the waiter approaches them again, looking rather frustrated. “You’re disrupting the other diners. I’m afraid the two of you must leave.”
Rainbow groans, swiping a hoof in his general direction, as if trying to smack him. “No, you’re disrupting us! We need to have our dessert. Can you make cider into jello? I want jello cider.”
Trixie suddenly stands on wobbly legs, knocking her chair back. “If there’s one thing the great and powerful Trixie knows, it’s how to get thrown out of a restaurant with pride!”
“But dessert,” moans Rainbow, laying her head on the wine-stained table cloth with a thud.
Suddenly the Great and Drunken Trixie gets a glitter in the eye. “We don’t need dessert, for we have something far better!” Rainbow’s ears prick, and I wince, waiting for the other horseshoe to drop. “Trixie has recently acquired a flat over the quill and sofa shop!” She pauses, smiling as if she’s performing for an audience.
“And in that flat Trixie has the most magnificent bed for the two most magnificent of ponies! Come Rainbow Dash! Let us go make love into the night!”