you read that wrong
Kichi comment
Hearing the screams you decide that you need some backup. You're about to call in more of your buggy brethren when-
"Wait, Solo, right. Oh yeah, the Guards!"
You start to run back towards the castle when you remember that you knocked them all the buck out,
"D'oh!" you lament, "On second thought, if those guys can't even handle a lone changeling then they're probably useless against whatever gorram abomination is attacking those fill-"
Your muttering is interrupted by more screams snapping you out of it.
"No rest for the wicked..." you mutter as you dash across the rickety bridge (plan D worked so far didn't it?) towards the screams.
Even thought those fillies aren't your responsibility and your disguise and flight aren't working, you aren't going to let some poor innocent foals get devoured by the forest. As you run, you think of an idea,
If I save them, then perhaps they'll be so grateful that they'll generate love (hero worship, NOT that other ESCLA(*1)-type of "love" you sickos) that I can consume! I could regain enough strength to find my Hive!
With that idea in mind, you smile and declare,
"Don't worry little fillies! I'm coming!"
A FEW MINUTES LATER
"Do'h! AGAIN?!!!" you yell in annoyance as you again find yourself lost in the Everfree and try to think of your next move...
What do you do? Well you take a break of course! you can't save anyone when your low on energy. And that bend can of bean's looks more appetizing by the minute. Maybe peel it open with your Aquila Talon. But oh wait! those must be magical beans if the can survived this long, and you know what happens when you open a can of expired magical beans.
...
ARE YOU SERIOUS!!! There are FILLIES in danger! Now's not the time for a snack break!
As you discard that idea and think of your next move, a thought comes to you,
you read that wrong's comment
"Huh... now that I think about it, how the hay did I I know there were exactly three fillies or if they were even fillies for that matter and not colts as foals are high-pitc-*smack*"
Suddenly your hoof bitchslaps you.
"Ow. Why do I keep doing that-*smack smack*"
Your hoof bitchslaps you twice and you take it as a cue that some narrative force is telling you to STBU, stop wasting time with nitpicking, and just go with it.
"I really need to check if involuntary self-harm is normal for changelings..." (*2*) you mutter as you continue running through the forest.
Erised comment
You find yourself at another loss as you quickly dart your head around looking for the endangered children. You might be looking out for yourself first and foremost, but I mean come on now, there's a group of little fillies in danger! Even changelings aren't nearly evil enough to endanger children.
Well... maybe Queen Chrysalis. She's pretty evil, but the point is, you're not!
"Alright Specialist, time to earn that rank. I just have to use my Spidey-Sense to find where they are before they get eaten alive..." you say and begin to concentrate as hard as you can. And you... can... almost... feel where they are...
"Wait, I'm not a super-teen getting rebooted every 4 years! I don't have that power!" you realize as another terrified scream echoes out through the woods.
"Screw it..." you say as you decide to just run towards the screams.
you read that wrong comment
When you burst through some bushes, you're greeted by the sight of 3 fillies running around in fear as some kind of tiger-goat-snake thing tries (and fortunately fails) to grab them. Wait a second...
"Gorramit, it's a Chimera..." you groan as you really wished those guards were here: they'd make for an excellent distraction that would allow you grab the foals and run to safety while the Chimera tore them apart, but unfortunately you only had the assistance of your own body and honestly you were starting to think even that was against you.
As the Chimera gets closer to the terrified children, your mind goes into overdrive with its limited memory,
Alright, I earned the rank of "Specialist" for a reason. Let's see... What was I taught in this scenario... Oh yeah; Whenever a higher ranking changeling is cornered, the lesser peasants should draw the attention of the threats to themselves so the more important one can escape for the good of the Hive... Why does that sound like it doesn't have everyling's best interest at-
You're snapped out of your thoughts by another scream. You now see that all three of the fillies have been backed into a corner and the Chimera is closing in.
Those fillies probably don't hold any rank in my hive, but buck it.
"Hey ugly-er Uglies! (I can't believe I'm using that line...) Why don't you pick on someone your own- er, slightly closer to your own size?!"
At this announcement the Chimera (along with the three foals) looked at you. For a good ten seconds, nothing/one/ling/pony makes a move until-
"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"
All three heads of the Chimera burst out laughing, hard.
"You can't possibly be serious!" the tiger exclaims through laughs.
"Honestly changeling, do you think we're seriously going to bother to take your kind seriously?" the goat chimed in, calming down.
The snake head/tail finished laughing and opted to stay silent as she focused on the foals.
"What's that supposed to mean?!" you yell indignantly at the insult to your entire species.
The tiger turns it's attention back to the foals as the goat head speaks,
"What I'm saying is changelings taste horrible! It's literally like trying to eat a cockroach covered in mud with toxic slime filling! If the hard chitin doesn't already drive you away then the bitter green blood will. The last time we tried to devour one of you roaches, we ended up let the pest drag itself away as our sister vomited for 5 minutes straight."
"OK first off why does everyone I meet keep comparing me to a cockroach?!" you respond, "I mean sure, ponies consider us an annoying pest, but seriously we're nothing like that! We have fangs see!?" you say pointing to you somewhat sharp fangs "Cockroaches don't have fangs! I think-"
"Silence roach." the goat said as it too turned it's attention back to the fillies as all three heads ignore you.
"Now sisters on 3." the tiger head leads, "One!"
Yeah... you kinda suck at the whole "distraction" thin-
"Two!"
No time to think! Gotta crank the suicidal level up to 11!
you read that wrong comment
Browndog77 comment
"Thr-!"
With that you throw your Bowler Hat like a Frisbee at the Chimera and it miraculously ricochets off all three of their heads... and then accidentally ricochets on all 3 of the fillies before landing near them.
"Ow!"
"Ow!"
"Ow! Hey!"
"Sorry!- I mean, Let's go." you apologize before defiantly declaring at the Chimera as all 3 of its heads whirl around to focus their angry glares on you.
"You're really starting to get on our nerves roach... " the tiger head growls.
"I sssay we make an exssssample out of him. " the snake adds.
"Yes, this bug has proven to be quite the annoyance, let's just squash him for sport sisters." the goat head chimed in as the vicious monster's entire body now facing you. Even though you're gulping in fear, you decide to stir the pot a bit more to keep their attention on you,
"Yeah well... uh... Your mother was a hamster and your fathers smelt of elderberries!" you yell as you position yourself in front of a tree.
The Chimera lets out a triple-roar as it charges at you, but you jump out of the way and it slams into a tree.
Erised comment
As the Chimera shakes off that daze of that impact, you notice a tree precariously hanging over the chimera by just a few wimpy vines. Thinking quick, you focus your chi to force-pull your Bowler Hat back to you and throw it at the vines...
Unfortunately your aim still needs work as your hat instead whizzes over the chimera and only slices through one of the multiple vines holding the tree in place before ricocheting off the tree and hitting the orange pegasus filly again.
"Ow! Again?!"
"Do'h! Sorry!"
"You missed." the three heads smirk in unison.
"Wasn't aiming for you." you half-truth with a smirk as you point both your hooves at the tree above the Chimera and focus as much of your chi as you can as the Snake head/tail looks up in confusion
"Someling call Sapphire Shores... " you declare as you yank your hooves back causing the tree to be force-pulled loose and collapse with a thunderous crash, kicking up a cloud of dust.
"You-"
"Still-"
"Missed!" the chimera heads say as they each emerge from the giant cloud of dust unscathed.
"Oh... uh. RUN FOR IT!" you yell to the fillies as you grab your hat and dive out of the way of the Chimera as it lunges at you.
Stupid gorram luck! you mentally panic as you flee from the Chimera hot on your heels, I need some breathing room, stat- *ding*
Quick! 815, use "Aquila Talon" and Chain Punch!
"Aquila Talon!" you yell causing your left hoof bracelet to transform into a bracer. As the Chimera closes in with the tiger head in the lead, you whirl around with your left hoof causing the hookblade to deploy and hit the Tiger full-on in the eye causing her to stumble back with an enraged roar of pain.
"Sister!" the goat and snake heads exclaim.
"You will pay for that, roach!" the Tiger yells as her eye swells shut.
"Little low on cash at the moment!" you quip as you thrust your left hoof forward to eject the hookblade and then retract it to grapple onto one of the lower branches of a nearby tree. You then force pull your Bowler back to you and in one smooth movement you put the hat back on your head as you smirk at the Chimera before making the "Bring it" motion with a hoof, but mentally you're going,
Holy Cruel Chrysalis! I can't believe that actually bucking worked! Why didn't I ever try straight-up combat before?
With rage in all 6 (correction, 5) of their eyes, the Chimera charges at you with jaws open, but you leap over the beast as it's fangs embed itself into the tree. Unfortunately the snake head lashes out, grabs you in midair with her teeth, and throws you, roughly slamming you into the nearest tree with a crack.
As you try to reorient yourself (and think you broke a rib or two), you see that the Chimera is stuck to the tree via the Tiger's fangs but the Snake head grabs you and throws you into another tree, breaking another rib.
"Right... That's why", you mutter through gritted teeth as you struggle to look back up and see the Snake head is coming in for another strike.
Adrenaline kicking in, you quickly manage to duck your head down so the Snake's fangs harmlessly hit against your Bowler Hat, repulsing her. She comes in for another go, but you're ready for her this time as you use your hookblade to grab the snake head by her neck and use her momentum to slam her face-first into a sizable rock on the ground. Before the snake can reorient herself, you quickly use "Chain Punch" to dribble her head against the stone with a rapid barrage of continuous downward strikes. When you stop your assault, the snake head flops onto the ground unconscious.
Now with the Snake KO, the Tiger stuck, and the Goat helpless to do anything, you run over to the fillies and yell...
you read that wrong's comment
"Quick! Hop on my back if you want to live!"
The foals stare at you, eyes wide in disbelief.
"Well?! What the buck are you three waiting for?!"
"W-well it's just that you're a uh a c-changeling s-sir...." said the unicorn with the snow white coat.
You facehoof as the Chimera starts almost freeing itself.
"Can we please not do this now!" you yell.
"How the hay do we know we can trust You?" the yellow earth pony with the big red bow questioned.
"Did you not just see me take on a Chimera single-hoovedly to save you guys?!" you retort.
"You hit us with a bucking hat!" the orange Pegasus yelled.
"Look I was aiming for the Chimera, my aim needs work OK? I'm sorry! Now can you three please GET ON MY BUCKING BACK SO WE CAN ESCAPE BEFORE THAT BUCKING MONSTER RIPS MY LUNGS OUT, TEARS THEM APART, AND USES THEM TO PLAY PING-PONG WITH MY GALLBLADDER?!"
"That sounds like an excellent Idea..." came the voice of the goat creature as the tiger dislodges a fang from the tree.
"OK!" the three fillies all yelled at once as they scrambled onto your back. After making sure all three were holding on tight (the adrenaline helping you ignore your broken ribs), you thrust your left hoof forward, shooting out the hookblade so it grapples onto a nearby tree.
"HOLD ON!" you yell as you pull your hoof back to make the chain retract and pull all four of you away.
When the tiger head finally dislodges itself, the Chimera finds its prey nowhere in sight.
"Where did our supper go?" the tiger head demands.
"Gone." the goat head answers, "This wouldn't have happened if you just-"
"Don't you even start..."
HALF AN HOUR OF RUNNING, SWINGING, AND GRAPPLE-HOOKBLADING LATER
BrownDog77 comment
When you think you're far enough away from the Chimera, you stop and catch your breath,
“Well... that... takes... care... of... that..." you comment between deep breathes of air, "Now.... what... are... you... 3... fillies... doing... out-” you begin before being glomped by three adorable missiles as each little filly hugs you and squeal out their thanks.
“Thanks for saving our lives Mistah!” says southern one with the red hair.
“Yeah, if it weren’t for you that thing would’ve eaten us!” says the squeaky unicorn.
“You are so awesome, thank you, thank you, thank you!” says the purple haired pegasus.
“I… I… HRK!” you cry as you clutch your chest and collapse to the ground, their adorableness giving you a cute overload (and upsetting your broken ribs(*3*)), “OK, OK, you’re welcome… Just give me some room OK?” you tell them as you try to get your breathing under control.
As the fillies get off you, you slowly get back up, gritting your teeth at your broken ribs. You sense the love the fillies are directing towards you (in the form of platonic hero-worship) and think,
Huh, that'll work. before you consume the love in the air and focus that love to cause a gentle cleansing green flame to briefly cover your body. When the flame ends, your ribs are healed and you don't feel fatigued, but you're hungry again.
“That’s better, now who are you and why are you 3 out here in the Everfree this late at night?”
“I’m Applebloom,” says the earth pony.
“I’m Scootaloo,” says the pegasus.
“And I’m Sweetie Belle,” says the unicorn.
“And we’re the CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS YAY!!!” they all shout at once, causing your ears to ring.
“Owww!”
“And we were out here looking to get our cutie marks in nocturnal archaeology until that thing attacked us.”
“Yes, thank you Mr. Changeling sir,” says Sweetie Belle.
“You're… not scared of me?”
“Well we were, but not now. You just saved our lives, why would we be scared of you?” asks Sweetie.
“Well I thought changelings were all wanted enemies of the state.” you say.
“They still are. Especially since you guys tried to invade Ponyville two weeks ago.” says Scootaloo, “Rainbow Dash loves clobbering you guys, I think she even dreams abo-”
"Wait, wait." you interrupt, "Number 1: Where is this 'Ponyville'?"
All three of the fillies point in the same direction and you follow their hooves to see that you're all at the edge of the Everfree forest near the outskirts of a town.
"Huh, horrowshow." you comment, "Number 2; What was that about a changeling invasion two weeks ago?"
"Weren't you a part of that invasion?" Scootaloo asks with confusion on her face.
"No, I was knocked out in this gorram forest since the failed wedding assault." you answer.
"In that case, it all started when we were trying to get our Cutie Marks as zoologists..."
"...And now the changelings are all locked up in some castle that Twilight says is 'class-eee-fed'." Sweetie Belle finishes
“Huh..." you verbally exclaim as you take all this in while mentally muttering,
There goes the "rejoining the Hive" option...
"And yet you’re all are still not scared of me?” you ask cautiously.
“Hay no, after what you did for us, we're now gonna to help ya!” says Applebloom.
“Help me?” you comment in confusion.
“Yeah, we’ll be CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS CHANGELING REFORMERS YAY!!!” they shout once more making your ears bleed.
“ARGH! OK FINE! JUST STOP SCREAMING!!!” you shout as you grab your ears in pain.
“Sorry,” they all sheepishly respond before Apple Bloom asks,
“Anyway Mr. Changeling, what’s your-?”
“WHAT?!” you shout through the ringing.
“What’s… your… name,” she says slowly.
“I’m Specialist 815!” you declare right before your hearing returns.
“Well that doesn’t sound like a name,” says Sweetie Belle.
“Yeah, that's more of a rank,” says Scootaloo.
“Hey it’s all I got, what do you want from me kid?” you snark.
“Well how about a name that sounds a little more name-ish?” says Apple Bloom.
"Yeah, so you can blend in better!" Scootaloo adds.
“Name-ish? Like what?” you ask.
"How about Hugh Jazz?" Scootaloo offers.
"I doubt it." you reply.
"Maya Buttreeks?" Scootaloo offers again with a hint of a mischievous smirk as Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle giggle.
"No." you reply more bluntly.
"Drew P. Wie-?"
"Nice try kid, but I've seen every episode of The Snafflesons." you interrupt.
"Darn it." Scootaloo says in disappointment.
“Well, what are some names that you like?” Sweetie Belle asks
You look up in thought and put a hoof to your chin as you think about a possible name and what you four are going to do from here...
WHAT DO YOU DO?