Writhe N. Payne's face went flush red. "I… y-you…"
"HA! Hahahaha!" Dan took the opportunity to point and laugh at the prosecutor. "Pranked by your own client! Looks like the only evidence you provided is that Dr. No can karaoke."
"Gnrrrrr," Payne growled, "don't think you've won this, biped. I won't stop until you trespassers are behind bars!"
Phoenix rubbed his chin, then grinned. "So you're saying, you're never gonna give us up?"
The jury burst into a gale of laughter. Dan, Lightning, Sombra, Spike and Firedancer doubled over, clutching their sides. Even the judge laughed, followed by Phoenix himself. The doors to the courtroom cracked open further revealing the two royal guards standing outside laughing as they watched. The only one who didn't find it funny was Writhe N. Payne while the rest of the court writhed in laughter.
"STOP IT!" Payne stomped the floor with both hooves, though this did nothing to stop the laughter. "I still have more evidence against you!"
Phoenix smirked. "And how much of it involves Rick Astley?"
"HA!"
The court erupted into laughter again.
Payne's face turned even redder. "STOP!! I am… this is a very serious matter!"
"I agree," Wright calmly said. "Your honor, I move that the records of this trial show that both the prosecution and the defense take karaoke very seriously."
The court's laughter practically shook the room. The judge had to bang his gavel through his own chuckles and that of the jury.
"Ordermmmmff, hahaha! Erhem, ORDER!! This court will come to order!!"
"Thank you… your honor," Payne said, regaining his composure. The rest of the courtroom and the defense counsel returned to their seats, only the occasional snicker breaking the quiet clamor.
"The previous evidence provided by the prosecution will be disregarded. And who is this new official who has entered the courtroom?" the judge asked, gesturing to Lightning Claw with his gavel.
"Um, I'm ah, I'm Lightning Claw. I work for FIST as chief of security," he waved his hoof.
"I see, well, despite your assistance with the previous evidence, you don't seem to have any relevance in this trial. I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to leave," judge said, an unfortunate tone to his voice.
"Awww," Lightning said. He approached the bench, tilting his head to one side, letting his hoof steps reverberate off the floor and looking at the judge with large eyes. "Pleeeeeeease?"
"Ohhh," the judge replied. "He's too cute. Don't you find these ponies too adorable to refuse, Mr. Wright?"
"Umm… yes?" Phoenix said, sweating. (Maybe it would be easier getting a not guilty verdict out of the judge if I was a pony.)
"You did try to kill me once," Dan harumphed, glaring at Lightning. "I ain't forgetting that."
"Awww, but that was a long time ago!" Lightning said, flying up to Dan at the defense bench.
"Three months," Dan replied. He held up his cane which had been strapped to his back for the trip. "And I still have this in case there are any more… electrical problems. I wonder if your medical insurance will cover you if you try to use the faulty wiring excuse."
"Does the defense have a problem with this new appointee?" the judge asked, now back to his traditional sternness.
Phoenix swallowed. "Um… do you… think Lightning Claw is… cute, Dan?"
Dan slowly turned to the lawyer. "Are you seriously asking me this question?"
"The defense is reminded that you are all under oath during these proceedings!" the judge bellowed.
"It might help having him with us, Dan," Phoenix said, still sweating.
"Fine," Dan sighed heavily. "Yes, he's… cute.
"Awwww," Lightning slowly wrapped his forelegs around Dan and gave him a hug.
Dan shook. "I'm going to kill all of you and hide your bodies in separate places, in separate pieces, separately."
"D'awww," Lightning pulled away. "We're friends now!"
"I hate you so much," Dan said, hugging back with his confined fingers.
"I love you too, Dan," Lightning nuzzled him a little.
"Yes, you're all cute, we're all friends, I'm going to strangle you with your own spinal columns." Dan pried Lightning Claw off of him, making a loud velcro noise as the static cling in Lightning's coat clung to Dan's shirt.
"Do you think Vice Grip is cute?" Lightning asked.
Dan shook. "Cute as a button. A launch button."
"That doesn't sound very cute," Lightning said.
"Depends on what you're launching."
"Mr. Wright!" the judge bellowed, deciding to join in on the conversation. "Do you think these ponies are cute?"
"Yes," Phoenix said quickly. "And uh, you know, they trust me with all of their important trials."
"How delightful!" the judge said cheerfully. "That's quite a responsibility!"
The prosecution didn't object but he did raise his hoof. "I, uh, I don't have an objection but uh…" He rested his head on the desk, nervous.
"Ah, Mr. Payne. What does the prosecution have to say about Mr., uh…"
"Lightning Claw."
"Lightning Claw's addition to the proceedings. Surely his expertise and adorableness will help the trial, don't you agree?"
Payne was sweating as profusely as Phoenix Wright was moments ago. "Um, sure but… I was wondering…" He stood up, adjusted his shades and brushed back his mane again.
"Yes, Mr. Payne?"
"Do… do you guys… think I'm… cute?"
The courtroom burst into laughter again. Dan, Lightning Claw and Firedancer had tears in their eyes as they couldn't contain themselves, even Phoenix clutched the desk to remain standing. The judge chuckled himself before banging his gavel.
"ORDER! ORDER! Mr. Payne, you have already been instructed not to make outbursts in this court! We will not tolerate any more of your disruptive jokes!"
Payne trembled. "B-but I wasn't joking…"
"We know!" Firedancer exclaimed, holding his stomach. "That's why it's so funny!"
"Order!" the judge banged his gavel again. "Mr. Payne, the prosecution will now proceed but you will take this trial seriously!"
Payne lifted his head up from the desk. "Yes, your honor…" He cleared his throat. "The prosecution calls to the stand its first witness, Officer Firedancer!"
"Hahahaha! Oh wait, that's me," Firedancer said.