It was quiet. Too quiet. Perfectly quiet. A sound that new parents yearn for.
"Waaaaaaaaahhhaaaaaaaaaa!"
Across the hall, the proud parents groan as they, once again, were torn away from the sleep they were so close to reaching. "Derring, can you...?" Ahuizota asked, feebly gesturing to the door.
"On it." The tired pegasus yawned and fumbled out of bed before trudging over to the baby’s room. Said baby was lying on her back in her crib, wailing like a banshee. Derring gently pulled her out and rocked her. "Calm down, daddy's here now." After a minute, little Yaocihuatl softened her cries to whimpers.
Derring sighed in relief as the noise went down. The bags under his eyes were a testament of how little sleep he had in the past few days since they came home from the hospital. "Scared of the dark? No, my little girl isn't scared of anything." He said. "She just wants to take over the world like her mommy. What's her diabolical plan? Making sure the only people who can stop her are too tired to do it by keeping them up all night. Yes it is, and she is doing great so far. All that's missing is the jungle cats."
Derring giggled to himself as he continued figuring out his foal's evil plan. "But like her momma, she made a miscalculation. She didn't realize that somepony needs to change her diaper eventually." He took a whiff and cringed in disgust.
"A big miscalculation indeed." He put his daughter down on the nearby table and proceeded to change her diaper. "The one time I wish I was a unicorn." He said, grumbling. He managed to remove the diaper and put on a fresh one with his hooves, with little mouth contact. Contrary to popular belief, wings were not as functional as hands. The diaper was disposed of and a now clean baby just stared at him sleepily.
"Your plan has been foiled...for now." Derring placed Yaocihuatl back in her crib and kissed her forehead. "Dream up some adventures tonight." He left the room and returned to bed.
"Dirty diaper?" Ahuizota asked, muffled by the pillows.
"Yep." Derring said as he slipped between the sheets, snuggling up to his wife. Once he was close, he felt her tail hand search its way between his legs. He became especially concerned when he felt her claws extend. "Uh, Ahui?"
"You made a miscalculation as well." She said, wrapping her arms around his body, restraining him with ease. "Forgetting to close the door when making fun of me in front of my daughter." She practically purred out. "Maybe I should foil your plan for future foals?" She traced a claw down the side of his face before working her magic on Derring.
His last words before he went down were "Not the face! Not the face!"
*****
A few days later found little Yaocihuatl gurgling with happiness as her grandma Memories played with her hoofies and toes. “This little piddy went to market, this little piddy went home…” Sweet Memories cooed at her grandchild. Beside her, flopped on the couch from exhaustion were her son and daughter-in-law.
“Thanks for coming over on short notice, Mom.” Derring said. “Kid’s been running us ragged.”
“Oh come now, Derry-Berry.” Sweet Memories said. “It’s no trouble at all. You get a break and I get to visit my adorable granddaughter and spoil her rotten. Everypony wins.” She leaned down to blow a raspberry on Yaoci’s belly causing her to giggle and squeal in delight.
“Don’t worry about that. Little tyke tyrant is already rotten to the core. She’ll take over the world by the time she earns her cutie mark.” Derring said jokingly.
“She’ll make her momma proud one day.” Ahuizota said, joining the conversation. “Just have to find her an arch-nemesis and let the rest work out on its own.”
Derring laughed. “I reserve the right to beat off any colts and arch-nemesii with a stick. A very pointy stick. Maybe two pointy sticks.”
“Just save a few for me, dear.” Ahuizota leaned over and gave him a quick nuzzle.
At that moment, little Yaocihuatl began to cry. Ahuizota sighed. “Derring can you get one of the bottle’s from the fridge?” He nodded and got up to get it.
Sweet Memories picked up the foal and rocked her. “You’re not going to breast feed her?” she asked.
Ahuizota’s ears pinned back. “I tried it a few times, but Yaocihuatl has a bad habit of being greedy. She’s not afraid to scratch when there’s nothing to drink. Plus, I’m too comfy right now.” She snuggled deeper into her spot as Derring returned with bottle in wing.
“One growth tonic for the child tyrant.” he said, placing the bottle next to the baby before jumping back on the couch. It wasn’t long until Yaoci noticed the revered drink and pounced on it (more like an adorable stretch until her grandma gave it to her). Keeping an eye on the baby, Derring said to Ahuizota, “At what point do you want to go for another? When she walks, talks, or plundered a village or two?”
Ahuizota lazily swatted at him. “Let’s wait until the first one and then we’ll talk.” she said, half-glaring at him. “Besides, I don’t think I’ll have the energy for another tyrant tyke.”
“Says you. The next one could take after me and uphold justice! Be a paragon saint.”
His mother just laughed. “Ha! This coming from the one who almost collapsed his entire school thinking there was buried treasure under it!”
Derring shot her a glare. “In my defense, I had legit proof! I just didn’t dig deep enough. Also, I got caught by the teacher.” he said while his wife cackled in glee.
“I think,” Ahuizota said, getting her laughter under control, “between the two of us, our foal is going to be a little tartarus-raiser.” Below her, said foal was on her back trying to suck the last of the milk dry from her bottle.
*****
Little Yaocihuatl sat in her high chair, awaiting the noms her parents would bring. She gurgled happily as her mother returned and sat in front of her.
“Alright Yaoci, I have your food here." Ahuizota said, opening the jar of baby food and spooning it out. "Here comes the airship! Whoosh!"
Out of sight, Derring watched as his wife mimicked their child eating the food, almost like some monkeys do. "Looks like broccoli this time. If Yaoci is anything like me, then 3…2…1…" SPLAT! "That's what I thought."
Back in the kitchen, Ahuizota had a forced smile while her daughter giggled at her new hat. She tried not to scream as the food seeped into her fur. "Now I know why Derring didn't want to do this." She swore a to get back at him for not telling her this would happen.
It took a few more jars and not a few towels before the feeding was finished. Later that night, Derring slid into bed with his wife and whispered in her ear. “Hey, Ahui. Feel like doing something special tonight?”
“What?”
Derring pulled out some whipped cream. “Food play.” he said with a shit eating grin.
He slept outside that night after learning how far his wife could chuck him out the window.
*****
“You sure you’ll be fine?” Derring asked for the third time as he put on his coat. Elsewhere, Ahuizota was scurrying about to finish some last minute things before their date tonight.
“Relax!” Silver Spade said. “Trust me, I can handle the kid while you two have a night on the town. Seriously, you guys need it.” She had stopped by yesterday and saw the frantic, worn out mess they were. The kid was really putting them through the wringer.
“I know, I know, but I’m a dad now. It’s my job to worry. I mean, have you taken care of a foal before?”
Silver rolled her eyes. “Yes, I’ve had to babysit my nephew a couple times. It won’t be that hard.”
Derring gave her a pointed look. “Your nephew is an earth pony who sleeps and moves like a rock. Yaoci is a pegasus hybrid with enough energy to burn a forest.”
“Hey,” Silver held up her hooves, “If the kid gets a bit rowdy, I’ll just levitate her for a while. Maybe stick her to the ceiling.” She said, then quickly added when Derring glared at her, “I’m kidding! Kidding! Maybe to the window, or to the wall.”
A facehoof was her only response for Ahuizota quickly reached the door. “C’mon, Derring. We’re going to be late!” With a whip of her tail, she grabbed her husband by the hoof and yanked him out the door.
Silver followed up to the doorstep and called out. “Don’t worry, I have the list of stuff to do that you gave me!” It wasn’t long before they were out of earshot. Chuckling, she turned back to the tyke sitting on the living room floor, trying to chew her way out of her bouncing chair. The sight of the little girl slobbering over herself was too much, forcing an ‘aawww’ out of Silver.
“Derring must be losing his touch if you’re giving him so much trouble. This’ll be a piece of cake. Now what did the list say again?” She quickly brought the list up to her face in her magic. “Hmm, ‘Keep her entertained’ That’s easy. ‘Use the food on the top shelf first’ Ok. ‘If she starts crying, use the milk in the fridge’ uh huh. ‘Keep an eye on her. Seriously. By the time you read this, she’s probably out of her chair’ Wait, what?”
True to the words, little Yaocihuatl had already slipped out of the chair and was crawling for the kitchen. But she fell short of her goal when she was suddenly levitated into the air. Not that she minded at all if the laughing was any indication, for it allowed her to flap her wings a few times before she came face-to-face with her caretaker.
“Well, that’s one thing you got from your dad.” Silver said to her, even though the baby didn’t understand and tried to boop her with her tail hand. “Yep, she’s gonna be a troublemaker when she grows up. The only question is who she takes after more in that regard.” She nuzzled the baby’s stomach, causing her to giggle. “Ten bits says it’s her mother’s side.”
In the next ten minutes, she just hoped that they never had another foal.
*****
Derring was excited for this day. It was a day any proud pegasus parent wanted to do with their flighty foals. Today was the day that Yaocihuatl wanted to learn to fly. She was certainly older now, a little over three years which was usually the time that a foals wings were strong enough to carry them short distances.
He stood with his daughter in front of his bedroom window. This was to ensure that she didn’t think it was okay to try to jump out her own window. Not that she probably couldn’t get past the triple child proof locks, but it was still important nonetheless.
“Who's ready to fly today?” Derring asked, “ Are you ready, Yaocihuatl?”
Yaocihuatl did a happy little dance in place and yelled out as loud and cute as she could. “Yay! Fly! Fly!”
Derring stared at her with mock seriousness. “You sound ready, but are you super serious? You have to be super serious to fly.”
She responded with her best at attention stance, though it was broken with her occasional giggles. “Soup ceweal, Dada.”
“Okay, you got me. Now first, we have to make sure your wings are ready.” Derring spread one of his wings. “See how my feathers are all smooth? That helps you fly. Show me your wings, Yaocihuatl.”
The tiny tyrant spread her wings, showing more than a few ruffled feathers from playing around the house.
“Hmm, it seems like either I haven't preened you in a while or somepony likes to get a little rough with her wings.” Derring said before pulling his daughter close and showing her how to keep her feathers straight. He surely didn't have any ulterior tickle based motives.
“Dada, no! Stop it!” Yaocihuatl said amidst her laughing. She squealed when Derring managed to sneak in a raspberry on the way to her other wing.
“Alright alright. I'm done now.” He said, letting her retreat back to her spot, out of tickle reach. “Now the next thing we have to do is flap our wings. Can you do that for me? Flap your wings.” He demonstrated his words to show her.
“Flap!” Yaocihuatl said as she tried to copy his movements. It took a few tries before she could follow it naturally.
“That’s great! Now we’re ready. Today, I want to show you how to glide. Stay here and watch me.” Derring said, stepping up to the window sill. He had taken his daughter on night flights when she didn’t want to sleep, so she should know how to do it, somewhere in her cute, little, clever brain of hers. Stepping off the window, he opened his wings to glide to the ground. Upon touching it, he looked back to see Yaocihuatl watching from the window with wide eyes full of wonder. After making sure the cloud padding he placed beforehoof was still strong enough, he called up to her.
“Now it’s your turn, Yaoci! Jump and glide! I’ll catch you.” he said.
Peeking over the edge of the sill, Yaoci stared at the drop and backed away. “Too high, Dada! No fly!”
His Dad senses going off, Derring flew back up to the window. “Don’t worry, Yaoci. Daddy’s here. I won’t let you fall.” Once she had calmed down enough, Derring held out his hooves. “Just fly to me. You can do that. Keep looking at me.”
Yaocihuatl approached the window sill again, this time only glancing at the drop before locking her eyes on her flying father. She crouched into pouncing position, wiggling her tiny tush before making the leap with wings flapping as hard as they could.
“You’re doing great!” Derring said, keeping just out of reach so she could keep flying. “Almost there!” He finally caught her when her wings were starting to tire out.
“You did it!” he said, hugging and swinging Yaocihuatl around in a circle. “You’re such a big girl!”
“Dada! I fly! I fly! Wheee! Pbbfffft!” Yaocihuatl waved her hands in the air, mimicking her wings. “Again! Again!”
Derring laughed at the adorable sight as he flew back to the ground. “You want to try again? Okay, but after we have lunch. Mom will get mad if we don’t eat.”
“Yay! I nom PBJ?”
“Say please.”
“Pwease?”
“Okay, but you have to use those eyes on mom.”
“Mmkay.”