//------------------------------//
// Eggs 
// Story: The Many Complications of Interspecies Romance 
// by HapHazred 
//------------------------------//

Applejack shifted her weight as she felt a soft, heavy weight press against her body from above. She drifted in and out of consciousness. One minute she'd be feeling light as a feather, uplifted by the breath of another brushing against her cheeks and mane. The next, she'd feel the sensation of muscles and bone was crushing the breath from her lungs.

She began to sweat under the oppressive weight and warmth. The heat built up under her skin, and she became more aware of her senses. Smell began to become a factor. She could smell armpit and morning breath in equal measures, made worse by the heat. The sensation of dampness intensified.

She began to hear things. The gentle, silent, small sound of air escaping nostrils. Her ears, ticklish to everything, began to flicker as somepony's mane brushed against the insides...

She opened her eyes, awareness of her surroundings returning.

Crushing her from above was Rainbow Dash, sleeping soundly. 

She wasn't just taking snuggling to the extreme. She wasn't simply draped over Applejack like a blanket. That, she could deal with. Instead, Rainbow was positioned in the same way as a cat indifferent to the fact that the thing it was sleeping on was alive might. She wobbled a little every time Applejack breathed in and out, and her weight, her weight, made each breath a struggle. As if Rainbow didn't even care for Applejack's sleep.

Well, that wasn't entirely true. Since the pair had begun sleeping in the same place regularly, Rainbow had gone from a loud and boisterous snorer to a silent and pleasant sleeper. She had seamlessly adapted to lying next to another live creature... and it had all been for Applejack.

So why, oh, Celestia why was she precariously balanced on top of Applejack? She wasn't a cushion to be sat on!

It wasn't normal. It shouldn't even be comfortable for Rainbow. She looked ready to topple at any moment.

Applejack's mind was made up. She was uncomfortable: she was going to move.

She moved her pelvis to the left with a short, sharp, violent motion, and Rainbow slid to the side... only to unfold, prepared for Applejack trying to escape. Her fore-hooves drifted up Applejack's coat towards her shoulders, and her hind legs slid against the disgruntled sleeper's body. Her waist and lower body pressed against Applejack's own.

Rainbow's eyes drifted open with the speed of a fat, pampered cat. They gave Applejack a look that, had she received late at night in a bar, would have caused her to immediately put down her drink, tip the bartender and take her home for cuddles and cake.

"Morning," Rainbow cooed.

Applejack was so flustered by the smooth, slick, and downright sleazy movements of Rainbow's athletic, taut body against hers that she completely forgot to complain about her sleeping habits.

"Uh..." she replied, eloquent as ever.





"...and, well, I didn't say anything," Applejack finished, tossing yet another slice of apple into her mouth. "But it's weird, ain't it? Ponies sleep with other ponies, not on them. And certainly not like that."

Rarity took a sip from her morning orange juice, and gave an unhelpful shrug. "Perhaps Rainbow is simply a little odd, dear. She certainly has other strange habits."

Applejack folded her forelegs. "Yeah, well, those at least make some kind of sense. Like her drinkin' ice cold water before goin' to bed to 'cool down her system'. That ain't normal, but I can kinda' twist my brain to make it work." She drank some of her coffee in between confused ranting. "That... just looked uncomfortable. But it weren't! I moved, and she just sort of slid into a normal position, business as usual."

"Maybe it's subconscious," Rarity suggested. "For example, when I work, I always tap my hoof. I don't even notice I'm doing it." She frowned. "Except, I suppose I do, because how else would I know about it? Hmm. How strange."

Applejack tapped her chin. "Maybe, Rares'. But I ain't ever heard of this kind of subconscious behaviour."

"It could just be a pegasus thing," Rarity said. "This wouldn't be the first time you've had difficulties adapting to life with a pegasus."

Applejack remembered only too well. She had to wear special shoes while tree-bucking now. "Perhaps. Maybe I should find some pegasi and ask 'em."

"Why not Rainbow?"

"She might get upset I don't like her usin' me as a mattress."

Rarity shrugged. "Or you could get over it. Maybe with time, you could enjoy it."

Applejack snickered. "No thanks: I like breathin' when I sleep."

Rarity gave Applejack a nonplussed stare. "You know, I remember taking care of Sweetie Belle when she was a foal. Eventually you might have to deal with the fact that things will sit on you."

Applejack snorted, and returned Rarity's stare with one of her own. "Rarity, you know as well as I do that ain't happening. We ain't equipped for that."

Raritty shrugged. "Well, if you're set on this, you could just ask Twilight. She isn't a Pegasus, but she'll probably know something about subconscious behaviour."

"I was gonna' ask Flutters."

"Yes, but Fluttershy gets awfully embarrassed when you talk about, well, sleeping. With her best friend." Rarity leaned forwards. "It makes her feel a bit awkward."

"Well, she'll have to get over it," Applejack said. "Twilight's out doin' some research on... what'd she call it?"

"Universe Theory something-or-other. Apparently she's having a lot of fun with the Pursuit Informatio."

Applejack shrugged. "I don't trust that book of hers. Magical books are always trouble."

Rarity knew only too well. "Yes, I am aware. Still, I'm sure Twilight will take the necessary precautions."

Applejack sighed. "Well... this'll be yet another awkward day in the life of Applejack the farmer, eh?"

"Hardly. It's still better than that time you thought sombreros were a good idea."

Applejack gave Rarity a death-glare that would have made a basilisk jealous. "We never speak of that. Do we, Rarity?"

Rarity sipped her juice again. "Speak of what, my dear?"

Applejack returned to her morning snack with her friend, watching her with a wary eye. "That's right," she warned. "Ain't nothin' to speak of."





After Applejack explained her position (and Rainbow's) to Fluttershy, she did feel awkward. It was the sort of awkwardness that spread across the room and spilled out into the street, leaving passers-by wondering why they felt the need to wear an extra layer or two.

"So, um, I was hoping you might tell me about pegasi sleepin' habits." Fluttershy did not reply. She was probably too busy wishing she was somewhere else. Applejack sighed. "C'mon, it's either that or I have to go and hurt Rainbow's feelings. I'd rather not do that. Just a little info'd be helpful, is all."

Fluttershy sighed.

"Um, okay," she began. "Well, it's not like every pegasus does this..."

Applejack folded her forelegs, listening intently.

"...but we rather like wrapping our partners in our... um, wings," she went on. "We have very sensitive wings, see, and it's very... nice."

Applejack nodded. "Yes, I noticed that. But that ain't what's happenin'. She literally lyin' on top of me, like some kind of guldarn' cat."

Fluttershy bit her lip. "Yes, um... are you sure Rainbow'd be happy with you telling me all this?"

"Nope," Applejack replied. "Which is why you're not gonna' tell her."

"Oh... right. Of course."

"So, about her sittin' on me..."

"Ah, yes, right... This one is more like motherly instinct, actually."

Applejack widened her eyes. "Rainbow's got one of those?"

"It looks like it," Fluttershy answered. "See, most pegasi instinctively try to keep their eggs warm during incubation period. It's quite common for us to... well, extend that to other things we think, ah, are precious."

Applejack's mouth hung open at the word 'egg'.

"I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch that."

Fluttershy swallowed. "pegasi try to keep their eggs—"

"There," Applejack said. "You said it again. 'Egg'. Why're you usin' that word?"

Fluttershy widened her eyes.

"Oh dear," she said. "Don't you know where baby pegasi come from?"





When Applejack returned home, she had a look of unadulterated horror on her face. Rainbow was waiting for her in their room, book between her hooves as she lay on the bed. She was slouched on her back, and Applejack's eyes were instinctively drawn downwards.

For the first time since she had started going out with Rainbow, her rump and assorted parts failed to look attractive.

Eggs come out of there, she thought, shuddering.

"Hey, AJ," Rainbow greeted, folding her page and tossing the book to the side. "'Sup?"

"I," Applejack began, "learned the strangest thing today."

Rainbow's ears perked up. "Oh? Like what? New rodeo in town?"

"Apparently, pegasi lay eggs."

Rainbow hesitated. The conversation seemed to hold its breath.

"Um, yeah? Doesn't everypony?"

Applejack shook her head, eyes still wide. "No, sugarcube. No we don't."

Rainbow frowned. "So... how does that work then?"

"The, uh, foals come out... normally. Like, they're born as babies, and... come with all the right bits attached. Without being in an egg," Applejack explained, putting an emphasis on the word 'normally'. Rainbow's mouth curled in distaste.

"What, like pigs and dogs and stuff?"

Applejack nodded. "Like normal animals, yes."

"That's gross," Rainbow replied, her own eyes widening too. "Like, really gross." She gasped. "Oh, sweet Celestia! Is that why sometimes there are those mares that get really cross at me when I call them fat?!"

"You called 'em fat? No wonder Daffodil ain't talkin' to us no more!"

"Hey, I only ever said it behind their backs! It's just Daffodil heard me!"

"That don't make it right," Applejack countered. "But before I forget: layin' eggs sounds disgustin'. Like... a bug or somethin'."

"More birdish than buggish, actually," Rainbow corrected. "It's just nature, AJ. No need to be creeped out by it."

"You were creeped out by our way not five minutes ago!"

"Yeah, but that was creepy nature."

"Eggs are worse. If they crack, they'll just... go everywhere," Applejack said, cringing. "And it's worse'n that, 'cause that's somepony's kid."

"Better than somepony's kid getting squeezed out of their butt. Honestly, how do you even fit through there with all the legs and stuff?"

"I'm told it's painful," Applejack replied.

"Besides, eggs are super practical. You can carry them around, take them to work, sit on them while you do your bills..." She looked at Applejack from hoof to withers. "You guys just get fat, then poop out a pony."

The pair fell into silence as they failed to stop themselves picturing their partners giving birth in their respective ways. Neither liked the mental image it provided.

"Okay. It's fine," Applejack said. "This is just something we'll have to deal with, ain't it?"

Rainbow snorted. "Says you. I'm staying away from your butt for a while. By the sounds of things, you could stick a fully armed ninja in there."

Applejack narrowed her eyes.

"I said, this is just something we'll have to deal with, ain't it?"

Rainbow caught the not so subtle threat of imminent violence in her tone. "Right... yeah. We can work past this."

Applejack nodded. "Yup. And I have the best idea," she declared. "I am going to repress this whole conversation as best I can. When, or if, we decide to cross that bridge, we'll... do something."

Rainbow pursed her lips. "Repress it?"

"Repress everything. Besides, we're two mares. We can't actually have kids, now, can we?"

Rainbow looked away. "Um..." she began. Applejack rolled her eyes.

"What else don't I know?"

"...well, uh... unlike most birds, pegasi don't actually need stallions to hatch eggs...?" she said, tentatively. Applejack went quiet. "It's just that... uh, it improves chances and stuff. It's more about... um... having the sex without actually needing the, uh, relevant parts. But if it's with a stallion, it increases the chances of a successful hatch by, like... loads."

Rainbow looked over at Applejack, a sheepish look in her eye, and waited for the inevitable explosion of indignation. 'How could you not tell me' was among one of the many questions Rainbow expected to be asked. 

No questions came. Instead, Applejack began to breathe heavily and sat herself down on the floor. Her breathing accelerated, and her expression was blank as a sheet of paper. Rainbow sat up straight, disturbed by Applejack's unexpected reaction to her last statement.

Getting cross at not knowing was one thing. Running a hoof through her mane and shaking her head in disbelief was another. Looking like she was about to pass out? Rainbow didn't see that one coming.

"You okay?"

"We can... we can have kids after all?" she asked. "But I didn't think you could if..."

"You can," Rainbow said. "It's just not likely."

"Huh." Applejack breathed in, a smile spreading across her face. "I didn't think I'd... even have a chance..."

Rainbow bounced onto the floor next to Applejack. "You're not mad?"

"I'm... I dunno," Applejack answered. "I spent most of my life thinkin' I'd never have foals of my own. I don't know what to think now you're tellin' me..."

Rainbow held her hooves up. "Hey now, let's not get ahead of ourselves. It's barely been a year. Way too soon for that kind of talk."

Applejack slowly nodded, and smiled. "Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. I'm just... boy, I got a lot to think about."

Rainbow grinned. "Okay then," she said. "Do you mind the whole egg-deal a bit less now?"

Applejack snorted. "Don't get me wrong, it still sounds completely unnatural, but... Maybe later down the line..." She looked down at the ground, and in a tiny voice, said "...worth it."





Twilight sat alone. Spike was nowhere to be seen. He'd be downstairs, Twilight reckoned, getting some late-night snack before he went to sleep. The silence of the room was deafening. It soaked up all the noise around her, leaving her suffocating without sound. 

Twilight looked down at the Pursuit Informatio. The book had answered small questions. Little things. 'What colour is the ball I'm holding'. 'Where is the ninth volume of Vector Velocity's treatise on rocket-powered pegasi'. Twilight regretted asking that one. Apparently, there were over a thousand copies of that specific volume. And now she knew the location of each and every one.

Now it was time for some harder questions.

Twilight licked her lips. There was a reason Spike wasn't there. Sometimes, magical books did things. Knowledge was omnipresent in this universe filled with magic, and she knew it had influence. If she acquired too much of it... She might as well go walking around a forest at hunting season with a goose taped to your head.

"What," she asked, "is the most powerful force in the universe?"

To her surprise, her surroundings were still in existence during the moments that followed. She made a small note on a pile of papers next to her. Doesn't destroy reality when asked complex questions. Try harder next time?

The Pursuit Informatio displayed only a single line of text, delivered directly to the part of her brain that always knew things.

Twilight repeated it aloud.

"...force of habit?" she muttered.





"Okay... you ready for sleep?"

"I can't believe I'm goin' along with this."

"Hey, it's just how we are. It's super comfortable," Rainbow said. "I'm glad you're willing to give it a shot."

"Just let me get comfy first," Applejack replied, and threw a thin sheet over herself, settling into position. "Okay... let's do this."

Rainbow's wings fluttered as she prepared herself. With a single, powerful beat, she was in the air, gliding around in a circle until she landed daintily upon Applejack's prone body. "Hey, it's pretty cool that I can do this without it happening while I'm sleeping."

"Just sit yourself down and let's get to sleep."

Rainbow curled in on herself, her wings and body hugging Applejack tightly. Applejack took a deep breath: her lungs were put under a bit more strain than they were used to.

"You okay down there?"

"Trouble breathing," Applejack replied. Rainbow frowned.

"Huh. How about if I move... here?"

Applejack felt the pressure on her stomach lessen. Her breath came smoothly now. She tilted her head to the side. "Huh. Actually, I feel okay." She lifted her head to get a good look at Rainbow. "How 'bout yoursel—"

But Rainbow was already fast asleep.