//------------------------------// // Dilan vs. a Junior Speedster // Story: The Moment No Pony was Waiting For (A Death Battle Parody) // by TundraStanza //------------------------------// A/N: Oh, good grief. What have I done? If it's not one thing, it's another. I need mental help. Oh and *spoiler alert* there's the teeniest, tiniest, bit of a chance that some blood will be spilled. Just thought it would be fair to warn you. Properties belong to Hasbro, Screw Attack, and Square Enix. (Oh, and I guess one line from Sega.) --- The Moment No Pony was Waiting For (28) ---Death Battle--- ~My kingdom, I'm the knight of the wind.~ *Pop.* Uh... *stashes replica of Caliburn* you saw nothing. Tornadoes, twisters, and vacuum chambers fill the screen. "You know, for something we can't see," opens B, "the wind sure packs a punch." "And today," adds W, "we're pitting two combatants that use the wind to their advantage." "Xaldin the Whirlwind Master." "And Gilda the Gryphon." "Who's up for eagle drumsticks?" "I'm W and he's B and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle." ---Death Battle--- A man with some crazy, long hair braids and wearing a black cloak is shown on screen. "Xaldin is No. 3 of Organization XIII," introduces W, "Like the rest of the Organization members, he is a Nobody, an empty shell of the original person after his heart was lost to darkness." "He used to be Dilan," says B, "an apprentice of Ansem the wise and a guard of Radiant Garden. But now, Xaldin is a freaking bad*ss." Stats appear as W continues, "He wields six lances, long ranged weapons that can somehow float and follow him wherever he moves. He is an elemental wind user capable of levitation and blasting back enemies using over pressurized air at lethal forces. His plan of attack consists of quick, multiple strikes. He can also reshape the pattern of his lances and wind to form a giant dragon-like entity that easily overpowers grounded enemies." "He's not just a strong fighter. He's also got quite a level in persuasion. Hell, he even turned Beast against Belle and the castle servants in rage." "Like the Dragoon Nobodies, Xaldin can perform jump attacks which are fairly difficult to dodge without a plan of escape. After he takes life-threatening damage, he can also perform the Limit Break attack known as Dragoon Storm. His lances swirl around him and deliver heavy blows of wind damage." "Mph. Pfft. 'Heavy blows'. It's too bad for Xaldin that even with all that hot air, he can't take an elbowing from a certain woman when he tries to force a decision." Indeed, the cut scene reveals Belle performing said elbow punch right into Xaldin's rib cage. She grabs the rose in his possession and then runs off. "Good one, Belle!" congratulates Keyblade wielder Sora. ---Death Battle--- The title card parts to reveal a creature with the head and claws of an eagle and the body of a lion. "Gilda is a gryphon and old friend of Rainbow Dash from their days at summer flight camp," introduces W, "As far back as the tales in Greek mythology, gryphons symbolize courage, power, and majesty." B points out, "So then why doesn't this gal have a crown?" Various facts and figures appear as W continues, "A gryphon is a half-lion and half-eagle and can easily display the strength and ferocity of both predators. Gilda is no exception." "In other words, it looks at you like cat food... or is that bird food?" "Like nearly every creature capable of flight in Equestria, Gilda can walk and stand on clouds, though actual manipulation of said clouds is still unknown." "So if I took a pair of clearly fake wings and stood on a cloud in Equestria, I wouldn't fall through?" "She can jump fairly high and her average flight velocity is only slightly slower than that of Rainbow Dash's average." "Sounds like my GPA." "Gilda is fairly aggressive and impatient, though she does try to keep up appearances when around friends. That said, her patience has a very low limit." "Six party pranks to be exact." A joy buzzer, spicy lemon drops, spittle glass, springs-in-a-box, trick candles, and a misplaced pin-the-tail illustrate B's comment. "She refuses to take responsibility for any of her actions and has been witnessed committing petty theft, startling the elderly, and roaring down a local's face." "Here, kitty, kitty!" The final cut scene shows Gilda saying, "When you decide not to be lame anymore, give me a call." ---Death Battle--- "All right, the combatants are set," declares W, "Let's settle this debate once and for all." "Gamefly!" shouts B. "Wait, what?" Wait, what? --- A/N: Wait, what? --- ---Death Battle--- "If you don't want to buy games," says B, "You can just rent games that you'd like to check out on Gamefly. There are no late fees and the monthly fee is relatively low for the quality of games you can find and play. You can rent out as many as 3 at a time by mail and when you're done with one, just send it back to get the next game on your customized list. If you want to keep the game you've rented you can choose to buy it straight from the site at a discounted price. Go to gamefly.com/deathbattle to get a 15-day free trial. But right now, it's time for a DEATH BATTLE!" ---Death Battle--- Uh... wow. I didn't expect him to throw that in. I thought we were done with ads. Ah, whatever. The setting for this battle appears to be a very generic, dark, and stone bridge out in front of nowhere. It's apparently nighttime in any case. A black dome that is a corridor of darkness appears briefly before disappearing to reveal a man. He's wearing a black coat and his hairs are all in long braids. Meanwhile from the other side of the screen, a cartoon-like gryphon flies in before landing on her feet creating a large booming noise from the stone bridge. "FIGHT!" "Where's the fun in this?" asks Xaldin. He pulls out four lances out of thin air and holds them while two others float diagonally behind him. Blustery winds seem to follow his command and levitate him. Gilda looks unimpressed and then flares her wings in anticipation of a fight. She even lifts an index claw in a taunting "come and get me" motion. No. 3 takes the bait and charges in with swirling lances. His lances swing through the air in various cutting motions. It's almost like he's dancing with the wind... if the wind consisted of knives. The gryphon for her part is managing quite well to avoid the direct sweeping attacks. She leaps over a low sweep, flies back from a lance twirl, and cleverly ducks under a few high, diagonal strikes. Xaldin alters his attack pattern slightly by jumping into the air. He almost seems to vanish before reappearing directly above his enemy and dives with air pressurized underneath two of his lances. The sudden wind blast to the head stuns Gilda as she's smacked into the stone bridge that she was standing on. The Whirlwind Master performs another jump-and-dive attack and a few feathers are knocked clean off of the gryphon's head. The organization member decides to jump again, but this time he does not disappear. Instead, his lances seem to encase tornadoes in a long serpentine form as he rides on its "head". It circles above the bridge a few times before holding a position on the left side of it. "Wear the face of despair!" Xaldin calls. The serpent-shaped vacuum opens its "mouth" and releases a long stream of wind at high velocity. It makes a long sweeping motion starting from one end of the bridge as it heads toward the other. Xaldin's intent appears to be to hit the enemy along the way. Gilda starts recovering from the earlier hits and shakes her head a few times. She then notices the wide, sideways tornado heading in her direction. Quickly, she starts flapping her wings and manages to fly high above where said tornado was aiming. She immediately follows up with a dive toward the man. Apparently, he had forgotten that she was capable of flight. Claws meet chest as Gilda rams Xaldin into the bridge. Feral instincts set in as she continues to swipe her claws against him. He has taken much damage, but the Whirlwind Master still has one trick left. With a flash of nearly invisible blue light, Xaldin is back on his feet and his lances circle around him creating wind bursts covering a five-foot radius. The gryphon who had been attacking on instinct is caught off guard and entangled by the sudden rushes of air. More feathers fly as Gilda is forced back a few feet. With a single toss, the Whirlwind Master throws one of his lances in a javelin style and uses his wind to exponentially raise its speed. The sound effect of flesh being pierced is heard. A few squirts of blood leak out of her chest and back as Gilda falls in a heap. The lance has pierced her heart. "K.O.!" ---Death Battle--- "D**n," says B, "That was a Death Battle." "Aggressiveness is a trait shared by Xaldin and Gilda," reflects W, "But Xaldin's lack of a heart prevented any emotions from clouding his thoughts. He had a superior advantage in range right from the start. Even though Gilda managed to dodge some of Xaldin's more impressive attacks, her predatory nature led her rage to blind her. In the end, she wasn't prepared for Xaldin's Limit Break Dragoon Storm leaving her wide open for the final attack." "Xaldin really blew her away." "The winner is Xaldin." A picture of Xaldin appears with his name boldly printed underneath. ---Death Battle--- "Stay tuned for more battles to the death." "Thanks for watching." --- A/N: Huh. Now I feel kind of guilty. Maybe I'll make up for it by making sure no one dies in the next chapter. I don't know. Properties belong to their respective owners. I gain no profit for this. I honestly don't know if that Gamefly offer is still available.